Immediate Danger
by Detective Olivia Stabler
Summary: Something terrible has happened to Olivia. As Elliot sits by her hospital bed waiting to find out if she will live, thinks back on everything they have been through together that got them to where they are today.
1. 1 Shadows

_**Immediate Danger**___

_**(Chapter One: Shadows)**_

**Olivia felt a cold seeping into her body as she stood next to her desk looking down at the open files and little yellow sticky notes scattered across it with messages written on them in her handwriting. She had a strange feeling in the pit of her stomach like something was very wrong and usually her feelings were pretty accurate. She looked around the large empty room with concern in her big brown eyes. Where was everyone? The door to Captain Cragen's office stood open, but there was no one inside. The entire building was empty. She stood listening to the screaming of the quietness as it echoed through her mind trying to remember if there was some meeting or cause for this. Something was terribly wrong. Olivia could feel the stillness closing in around her and for a brief moment of panic as if it would swallow her up like it seemed to have done her co-workers. She reached in her pocket and pulled out her cell phone. No missed calls. With a confused look of concern she dialed Elliot's number. Just as she as she was about to push the send button Olivia heard a familiar sound. She closed the phone and walked slowly toward the office door and into the hallway then she heard it again.**

"**Olivia?" A voice called to her. It was Elliot, he must have been looking for her. With a sigh of relief she proceeded down the hallway toward the staircase. **

"**El? What's going on?" She called out, but when she got to the top of the stairs no one was there. **

"**Elliot?" He must have been downstairs and unable to hear her calling to him. Olivia made her way quickly down the staircase to the lobby area on the ground level of the building, but it appeared to be empty as well. She walked over to the large glass doors and peered into the street outside, but it was empty. Just then she saw a reflection in the glass, someone was standing behind her. Olivia felt a lump rise into her throat and her heart pounding so hard she thought it might explode. The figure in the glass appeared to be staring straight at her, but she couldn't make out a face. Judging by the reflection, this person was much taller than Elliot. She lowered her hand and moved it ever so slowly to unlock the revolver she carried with her. Liv felt breath on the back of her neck as she gripped the handle of the gun with her trembling hand. **

"**Freeze!" She yelled as she spun around ready to fire on anything or anyone who may cause a threat. But no one was there. Olivia noticed what appeared to be drops of blood on the floor in front of her and with gun in hand knelt down to take a closer look. She reached out and touched her finger tip to the dark substance. Not only was it blood, it was fresh blood. The droplets were still warm to the touch. She heard a gentle tap on the floor as more drops appeared. Soon the droplets had formed a small puddle. Olivia looked up above her head to try to see where they could be falling from. Then she realized she had gotten the blood on her hand. She opened her hand and the blood ran between her fingers and fell to the floor pooling beside the small puddle she had found before. **

"**What?" She mumbled quietly to herself. She took off her jacket and dropped it to the floor examining herself for wounds. She didn't appear to have any, but blood had soaked a large portion of her white blouse. Olivia felt a tear roll from her cheek. What the hell was going on here? She could feel herself about to lose control. Was she going crazy? Where was everyone? What had happened to them? Whose blood was this? What had she done? **

**Olivia brushed her hand across her face to push her hair away from her eyes. She turned back around to look into the reflection of the glass door once more, but she only saw her own blood smeared face. Beginning to feel weak and dizzy, Olivia backed up into a corner of the room. She could see from here if anyone approached her. She leaned back against the wall and slowly slid down to sit in the floor. Liv felt her eyes getting heavy as she tried to keep herself alert, but it was no use. She leaned her head against the wall and closed her eyes.**

**What seemed like only moments later Olivia heard footsteps in the room with her. Still groggy, she opened her eyes to survey the room. Everything was blurry and the room appeared dark. To her right she could see a soft white light. She could make out figures of people but she could not see them clearly and they didn't appear to even notice her. Where was she?**

"**Elliot?" She heard her own voice call softly. Then she closed her eyes and drifted off again.**


	2. 2 Devastation

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Two: Devastation)_

It was about six o'clock Sunday evening and Elliot was having dinner with his children after church when he felt his cell phone vibrating. He reached into the pocket of his black suit and looked down to see who it was. Elliot hated to be disrupted during his time with his children. Since the separation he only got visitations with them a few hours a week and he wanted to make the most of them. He hated missing out on their lives so much, but under the circumstances until a custody agreement could be reached between the lawyers and the divorce was final he tried to make the best of things for the sake of the children. It was Captain Cragen.

"Daddy?" Maureen said with disappointment. "You don't talk on your phone at the table, it's rude!"

"I will just be a minute honey." Elliot replied as he stood up and kissed her on the forehead. "I have to take this. Kathleen help your brother out," he said motioning for her to hand the Eli another breadstick from the basket on the table. Elliot walked toward the front door and opened his phone and placed it to his ear. He was about to ask what was going on when he heard the concern in Cragen's voice on the other end.

"Elliot, something has happened. You need to get to Bellevue as soon as you can. It's Olivia."

Elliot shut the phone in his hand and for a moment felt almost nauseous not knowing what was wrong with her. Cragen wasn't sure of the details himself, but had received a call after the first responder to a 911 dispatch had sent them to Olivia's apartment and they realized she was a cop. All they would tell him over the phone was that she was badly injured and was being taken to Bellevue. Cragen immediately called Elliot to meet him there. Elliot rushed back to the table. Their food had just been delivered and the kids were enjoying their meal.

"What's going on daddy?" Kathleen asked as the other four children looked up at him with questions in their eyes.

"I have an emergency at work and I have to go, now. I have called your mother and she is going to pick you guys up here. She is on her way. You guys just stay right here, finish your dinner and wait on her. If you need me call my cell," he replied.

Elliot felt a little uneasy leaving the kids in the restaurant like this. But they were in a upper-class restaurant in a good part of the city and Kathy was only a few blocks away when he had called her giving as few details as possible and she agreed to come get the kids. Besides Maureen was eighteen and Kathleen sixteen, both plenty old enough and responsible enough to sit with the three younger children for the twenty minutes it would take their mother to arrive. Elliot kissed the kids goodbye and paid the check then rushed to Bellevue to be with Olivia.

The twelve block drive across town seemed to take hours. Everything seemed to be moving in slow motion. Every bad thing he could possibly think could have happened to her was rushing through his brain. Elliot had never felt so scared or worried about Olivia like this. He parked the car in on the third level of the parking garage and raced up two flights of stairs to the fifth floor Intensive Care Unit. Elliot couldn't even breathe until he saw Cragen standing in front of him. He felt his heart pounding as he walked quickly toward Cragen at the end of a hallway that seemed to grow longer in front of him with each step he took.

"Where's Liv?" Elliot said with tears welling up in his eyes. "What happened?"

"They have not told me anything. Just that the building super who lives in the unit across the hall came home to find Olivia's door standing open. Liv was unconscious on the floor and there was a lot of blood. He called 911. When the paramedics realized she was police they contacted me. I called you first thing," Cragen replied. Moments later a nurse approached the two of them. Elliot happened to notice the chart she held in her arms had Liv's name on it. Elliot raised his eyes to meet hers.

"Are you Elliot Stabler?" She asked politely.

"Yes, I am." Elliot answered nodding his head.

"I'm sorry I couldn't give your friend here any more information on Olivia Benson, but you are listed as her next of kin on her medical files. I cannot legally release the information to anyone but you. I'm really sorry for the inconvenience."

"Is she okay?" Elliot blurted out.

"I'm going to let you talk to the doctor on call, he is the one that has been monitoring you friends condition. If you would please follow me, the doctor is waiting."

Elliot was starting to get annoyed with the way these people seemed to be avoiding giving him the answers he so desperately needed. They followed the woman down another hall and around a corner. At the end of the hall was a hospital room. The blinds were closed, but Elliot could see the forms of a doctor and two nurses moving around inside the room.

"Wait here," the woman said as she walked slowly toward the room opening the door and speaking to the doctor inside. Within seconds a tall dark headed man came out of the room and was standing in front of them. The man appeared young, really young, twenty five maybe. Too young, Elliot thought to have already been through medical school.

"I'm Doctor Jacobs," the man said shaking Elliot's hand. "We have her stabilized for now, but she has lost a lot of blood. She's probably going to need more in the next twenty four hours. She has been fading in and out of consciousness since they brought her in and has not been able to give us any details on the attack."

"What the hell happened to her?" Cragen asked. Elliot was still trying to form words to speak.

"We're not completely sure. She was attacked and possibly raped. He beat her up pretty bad. My guess she put up one hell of a fight. She has several small defense wounds on her hands. I'm guessing he held her at knife point as he held her down and assaulted her. She has a small burn on her left cheek, it appears to be a carpet burn. Those are all minor scrapes and bruises. She also has a couple of broken fingers on her right hand. Our big worry right now is the head wound. He hit her at least twice with a blunt object, something heavy. This is what caused most of her blood loss. She sustained a severe concussion. I'm guessing the broken fingers were from her raising her hands to try and shield her face from the blow. It doesn't look good. You have to understand that even if she does survive this there is no telling how this kind of trauma could effect her brain," Doctor Jacobs stated.

Elliot looked up at him, unsure of what to say. "We have the same blood type," he mumbled as he placed his finger tips to his brow trying to remember the last time he saw her face. She was smiling at him, she had a beautiful smile. He needed that memory to help hold him together now. There was no way he could handle it if he lost her.

"That's good," said Doctor Jacobs. "It would be good if we went ahead and drew some, so we have it if she needs it. I can arrange it."

"Did they run a rape kit?" Cragen asked. At least one of them was thinking like a cop. Olivia needed them on her side right now and Elliot wasn't able to think of anything at the moment except that smile. Her beautiful smile and the way the sunlight beamed off her auburn hair as if setting it afire. Elliot had always thought that Olivia was one of the most attractive women he had ever seen. But, she was more than beautiful. She was smart and dedicated to the cause and he had never met anyone with her passion for life. Somewhere inside he knew he would never meet anyone like her ever again. He couldn't let her die. She would never give up on him. He had to fight this battle for her until she was strong enough to fight it on her own. She was counting on him and he was not going to let her down.

"Since she wasn't conscious long enough to consent, we couldn't run the rape kit with out permission from her next of kin. That is you Mr. Stabler," the doctor replied looking up at Elliot.

"Bring in Warner," Elliot said. "Let her do the kit."

Doctor Jacobs gave Elliot a strange look. "We have a full staff of medical professionals who are perfectly capable of taking care of your friend. I assure you she is in good hands."

"No offense to you and your staff doctor, but my partner was just assaulted and probably raped by a man who tried to murder her! I'm not going to let some complete stranger perform a very invasive procedure on her. Our department is handling the case and I want our people on the inside of this thing. Doctor Melinda Warner, has been a licensed medical examiner for over fifteen years and has assisted our department in hundreds of these types of cases. She knows what she is looking for and Olivia knows her. I would just be more comfortable if you allowed her to do this!"

Elliot glared at the young doctor with a very stern look. There was no way he was going to let some strange man examine Olivia. If she had infact been raped he knew that she would not be comfortable with a man she had never even met before completing a rape kit on her.

"This is against hospital policy," the doctor said shaking his head. "But I understand. I will allow your doctor to do the examination, but I want one of my nurses present. And I need a copy of the report to go into her file."

Elliot nodded in agreement. He actually felt a little accomplished that was easier than he thought it would be. He turned around to see Cragen staring him down.

"You are not on this case Elliot," Cragen said in a stern voice. "I know you want to help her, but you are too close to this. I can't allow it. I will make sure she is taken care of and I promise you that no one in this department will rest until justice is found for her. I want you to take some time off. Stay here and be with her. She needs you here. I will oversee things on the other side of these doors and make sure Olivia's case is in the best hands. I will keep you as up to date as I can, but I can't give it to you. I hope you can understand."

"I want to know what is going on! Get somebody out there and find this guy! I don't know if I can just sit here and wait for her to die! Sit here and do nothing!"

"We are doing everything we can do! Her case is top priority! I have only the best people on this! I will have Dr. Huang get started on some kind of profile for this guy, Munch and Fin are leading a team processing the crime scene and questioning in neighbors and anyone in the neighborhood who may have seen her attacker. Believe me Elliot, you are not the only one who wants to see this bastard caught and punished for what he's done to Liv." Cragen put his hand on Elliot's shoulder in an attempt to comfort him. "Melinda Warner is on her way down here. After she finishes the examine hopefully we will have some sort of evidence to go on, something that will help us to catch this guy and put him away for good. Doctor Jacobs said you could go in and Olivia in a few minutes. I think she needs you with her right now. I'm going to get over to Olivia's apartment and see what I can find. We will make it through this if we all stick together. We will _all _make it through this. She needs us to be strong for her, Elliot. You call me if anything changes or as soon as you find anything out." With that Captain Donald Cragen patted Elliot on the back and headed back down the hall.


	3. 3 Alone In The Night

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Three: Alone In The Night)_

Elliot stood against the wall next to the window to the room Olivia was being kept in. This waiting was killing him. The nurses and doctors were still getting her settled into the room and cleaned up, then he would be able to go see her. Thinking about the injuries the doctor had described made Elliot almost cringe in anger, how could anyone hurt her? Why would they? Olivia was so vibrant and full of live. Or she used to be. She would have given anything to anyone and done anything to help people. She was the heart and soul of their partnership. A partnership he knew couldn't survive without her. He needed her. He always had. But it wasn't until now that he realized just how much.

Melinda arrived within the hour and completed the exam. Elliot didn't end up being able to see Liv until after Melinda had finished her work. She hurried back to her lab to try to pull a few strings and rush the results of Olivia's rape kit. She was supposed to call him as soon as she found something out.

For now Elliot sat alone in a quiet room holding Olivia's hand. It was night time now and the room was dark except for a small light in the wall down by the floor that illuminated the way to the doorway. Liv was battered and bruised, but seemed to be resting peacefully. She was breathing on her own, but had machines hooked up to her to monitor her brain activity and heart rhythm. The nurse had come in and turned down the volume on the machines so that Elliot could rest if he needed to. He was tired, wore out, but refused to sleep for fear that Liv would gain consciousness for a few seconds and he wouldn't be awake to comfort her. Instead he sat in a chair next to her hospital bed with his head resting on the bedrail and holding her hand. He prayed for her to just squeeze his hand to give him some sign that she was still with him, but there was no response. Every couple of hours a nurse would come and check Liv's IV and the bandage on her head and then she was gone again. Gone, Elliot thought to himself. Gone to her desk in the hallway about six feet from the door of Olivia's room. There were camera's inside the room and a monitor at the desk so the on duty nurse could keep a constant watch. Elliot was actually kind of pleased with the care they were giving Liv.

Elliot decided to step out and get a cup of coffee. He had been sitting in her room in the dark waiting for sleep, but there were too many things on his mind. There would be no sleep for him tonight. He looked at the clock in the hallway 11:54 pm. Elliot thought to himself, at this time last night he and Olivia were sitting in a small diner with Cragen, Fin and Munch unwinding over cheeseburgers and beer from a long and eventful day at work. Elliot took a deep breath and a sip of the strong black coffee. What he would give if he could go back to last night, back to that diner and see her again. He would walk her home and not let her out of his sight, he would do whatever it took to protect her. But it was too late for that now. Now the only thing he could do was be with her. Just sit with her and wait. Elliot walked back to Olivia's room. She looked so peaceful resting there, like an angel. He moved closer to her bed and leaned in to kiss her forehead. A part of him still hadn't quite registered that this was all real. He stood over her watching her sleep as if standing guard. Then he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket.

"Hello," he said with just a hint of excitement in his voice.

"I'm getting off the elevator now, " he heard Melinda's voice say on the other end of the phone. "Elliot I need to talk to you."

"I'll be there in a minute," Elliot replied as he hung up the phone.

When Elliot stepped out the door of Olivia's room he saw Melinda at the other end of the hallway.

"Melinda," he called to her.

She turned and moved toward Elliot. In her hands she held the report from Olivia's rape kit results. Elliot felt a lump rise in his throat.

"You got the results? That was fast."

"Well, I called in a few favors. How's she doing?"

"Resting for now. She hasn't woke up since I got here."

"She did good Elliot! Liv's a smart girl. I was able to pull tissue from under her fingernails, she fought him hard. Elliot, she was raped. There were two attackers. I pulled two different semen samples and a couple of hairs in the rape kit and sent them off for testing. I should know more in the morning."

Elliot stared down at the floor trying to process everything that had just been said to him. "Have you shared these results with anyone else?" He asked Melinda.

"No, I thought I should talk to you first," she replied.

"Don't put that in your report!" Elliot said.

"Elliot, no one is going to think bad of Olivia. She was raped. These men forced themselves on her. This is in no way her fault!"

Elliot took a deep breath and ran his hands over his face. "I was with her this morning." He said quietly, still looking down at the floor.

"You were with her? Did you happen to notice anyone watching her or following her? The officers said she had probably been out running. Do you think someone may have followed the two of you back to her apartment?"

"No," Elliot said looking into Melinda's eyes. "We didn't go running. I was _with _Olivia this morning. We made love. I didn't use a condom. I stayed with her last night."

Elliot watched Melinda's face as she tried to register the information he had just given her.

"You had sex with Olivia this morning?" Melinda asked.

"Yes." Elliot nodded.

"In other words, one of the samples I found is yours. Elliot I'm going to need a DNA sample to…"

"I'll get you whatever you need," Elliot said cutting her off. "Look, Melinda, no one knew about us. I really don't think this is the best way for people to find out."

"I'll make sure this just stays between us," Melinda answered. And with that, somehow the fact that Olivia had recently had sexual contact with two men somehow disappeared from her file.


	4. 4 Haunted

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Four: Haunted)_

One Year earlier….

It had been so many days since she has seen his face, heard his voice or felt the comfort of his hand the way he placed it on the small of her back to lead her into the room the like he sometimes did. Olivia was beginning to wonder if she had made the right decision in going undercover for so long. But the truth was that she didn't know what else to do. It wasn't the first time, she had been approached by the fear of losing the only person she had left in her life. Elliot was more than just a partner. He was more than just a friend. He was the only person in the entire world she trusted fully and completely. Olivia was closer to Elliot than she had ever been to anyone in her life.

Not knowing the identity of her father had quite an effect on Olivia's life. Her relationship (for lack of a better word) with her mother was damaged from the start. Serena Benson had loved her daughter dearly. But after a few cocktails she never failed to remind Olivia of the truth of her existence. Olivia was the product of her mothers rape. This fact haunted not only Serena, but Olivia as well. She still remembered a few nights when her mother had a drink or two too many and they would fight. The arguing and shouting would last for hours with words that cut to the bone. More than once Serena had reminded Olivia how she could have chose to abort the pregnancy or to give the baby up for adoption. Instead, she _chose_ to have her daughter and raise her alone. Though she never really felt her mother's pain, Liv tried to understand where it came from. Olivia often though about how scared she would have been if she had found herself in a similar situation. Though it didn't seem to matter how much she tried to avoid confrontation with her mother, two glasses of wine and Serena was a complete stranger full of hostility. One day Olivia just couldn't take the drinking anymore so she packed a bag and moved out.

Olivia managed to keep a distant relationship with her mother. She would not see or hear from Serena for weeks at a time, then one day she would call and want to meet up for lunch. They had never discussed that day or the events that lead up to it, but just accepted it and moved forward. Olivia met her own demons that day. Before she could get packed and make her getaway, Serena had come home. Olivia tried to talk to her mother. No fighting, no shouting or harsh words. But Serena had already worked her way through about half a bottle of vodka and refused to hear her daughter's pleas. With tears in her eyes, Olivia threw the strap of her bag over her shoulder and headed for the front door to her boyfriend's car waiting outside.

Before she could make it down the stairs of the apartment, Serena grabbed her by the wrist. Serena had given up on bargaining with Olivia to get her to stay and resorted to verbally attacking her instead, a decision no doubt influenced by her blood alcohol level. Olivia felt Serena's hand tighten around her wrist Serena pulled Olivia toward her forcing their eyes to meet. Serena shook Olivia while looking her in the eyes, called her a whore for running off to live with her boyfriend and slapped her across the face.

Olivia's next move was one that she would regret for the rest of her life. Serena had moved in front of Olivia to block her path. When Olivia tried to leave Serena grabbed her arm again and Olivia shoved Serena hard to get away from her. Under normal circumstances Olivia never would have hurt her mother. But the circumstances in this household had not been normal in quite a while. Olivia must have pushed her much harder than intended because Serena flew backward and fell down the staircase. For a brief moment Olivia was sure she had killed her mother. She hadn't of course, but their relationship never really resembled that of a normal mother and daughter.

For the past few months Olivia had completely been cut off from her usual life. She had agreed to go undercover to help out the F.B.I. on a case when a confidential informant on a case, Hailey Kerns, was killed. For the last sixty-three days, Olivia had not even heard anyone speak her name. Here in this life she was known as Persephone James, a naturalist involved with a group of people who responsible for several echo terrorism attacks. It had been quite a culture shock for Liv, these last two months living in Oregon. And she had more than enough time to think about her relationship with Elliot. Olivia found it strange how much she missed being around him and wondered how he was getting along with out her. She felt bad about the way she had left things back in New York. She just disappeared and hadn't even had the chance to tell Elliot goodbye or explain this to him. She had to leave so quickly that she herself hadn't even had any notice, it was crucial to this case that her cover not be blown. But now the case had been closed. All of the loose ends were tied up and she had been back in New York for a little while, not quite ready to return to work.

She had done some thinking about their situation a several months before when she and Elliot had realized they needed a break from each other. They had been working so close for so long that it had began to feel as if they were under appreciative of each other. After a very heated argument in the middle of their precinct she had told her captain that she wanted a new partner. She had reached a point in her life and career that she thought she would never reach. She and Elliot had actually had a fight, a real fight. This scared her more than she would admit. They had never fought. Sure they had disagreed on occasion, but never to this extent. And she had never found herself offended by the words he said to her. This time, the words they exchanged were hurtful ones. And though she knew in her heart that neither of them really meant what was being said, she knew there was an even deeper problem hidden within them.


	5. 5 Ruin

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Five: Ruin) _

In the moments leading up to their very public outburst, Olivia had been attacked by a murder who was holding two small children hostage. Victor Paul Gitano, had slashed her across the throat with a knife when she tried to stop him from boarding a train with his hostages. Luckily the cut was not deep enough to cause any real damage, but Liv had been knocked down and was bleeding. Elliot turned back for just a moment in panic to check on her. In this moment Victor murdered one of his hostages, a young boy and escaped with his sister. This is the guilt that fueled Elliot's half of the argument. At the end of the day the case had worked out, but the damage between them was done. In a quiet moment alone they had agreed they could never put their personal relationship ahead of their job again. Elliot had said that he couldn't do this anymore. And somewhere inside she knew that she couldn't either. They needed a break from each other. Olivia transferred to computer crimes for a little while, but somehow found her way back to sex crimes. Right back to where it had all started eight years earlier.

The last time she came back they had managed to, for the most part, put things back in order. But this time she wasn't sure how Detective Stabler would handle her return. Upon her return to the city Olivia had found herself almost anxious to get back to work, to see her co-workers again. They were like her family and she had grown to miss them all while she was gone. But when she returned she quickly realized that things were not quite as she had left them. Elliot had gotten himself a new partner. Detective Dani Beck and from the looks of things, he was getting quite comfortable with her. Liv couldn't help but feel a little jealous of this woman, but she didn't really understand why. After Captain Cragen suggested she take a little personal time, Olivia had realized that maybe she wasn't quite ready to come back.

But this time she was back and she intended on staying. Olivia found herself standing in front of the elevator door with an uneasy feeling in her stomach as she watched the light count down to the parking level and the doors opened up. She stepped inside as the doors shut in front of her. She was a little nervous, she wasn't quite sure where she would fit in anymore. And she wasn't exactly sure what she would say to Elliot when they came face to face once again. When the elevator door re-opened Olivia it was almost as if she had never left. Infact, it seemed as if no one even noticed she was standing there. She felt kind of selfish for admitting that she had expected at least one familiar face to look up at here and seem happy to see her. Someone to turn to the rush of detectives in the room and say "Hey everyone, Olivia is back!" Well, maybe not. But they could at least acknowledge the fact that she was gone!

Liv walked toward Captain Cragen's office, but she didn't see any of her friends around. Munch and Fin must have been out somewhere busting criminals. And Elliot was probably off somewhere with Detective Beck. Olivia tapped on the glass to Cragen's door as he motioned for her to come in. He was on the phone when she entered so the closed the door behind herself and sat down in the chair in front of his desk. This seemed strange for her. Usually when she was in Cragen's office it was just long enough to fill him on the latest details of the case she and Elliot had been working on and then they were off again.

"Welcome back, Detective Benson!" Cragen said as he hung up the phone. "You picked kind of a crazy day to return, Munch, Fin & Elliot are all off in court at the moment. That is liable to take all afternoon. We have been so tied up in this mess, I'm afraid that all I really have for you at the moment is paperwork! That is until I can get you a paired up with a partner again."

"Paper work is fine," Liv said with only partial disappointment.

Cragen stood up and handed Olivia a large stack of files. "I assume you remember how to do this," he said with a laugh. "You can just set up at your old desk."

"Won't Detective Beck be using it?" Olivia asked, really only half interested in the answer.

"You know Detective Beck?" Cragen asked.

"We met for just a moment when I came back before. She seemed like a nice girl." Liv said.

"Well, Dani doesn't use that desk anymore." Cragen replied.

Olivia had a knot in her stomach the size of a basket ball. Somewhere inside she feared Cragen would stick her with Detective Beck. Then she wondered if Elliot had talked about her to Dani. What would he have said about her. Was it good or bad?

"Detective Beck is no longer with us." Cragen said.

"Oh." Olivia felt her a lump in her throat. Now she felt horrible for being jealous of this poor girl. "Do you mean….?"

"No," Cragen cut Olivia off in mid sentence. "I mean, Detective Beck has decided that her interests lie in another department. Not everyone can handle sex crimes, Liv."

Olivia just nodded her head in agreement and took her seat back at her old desk. She opened a file in front of her and attempted to get some work done. But she found herself distracted. Gazing over on Elliot's side of the desk, she noticed that his picture of Kathy was gone. The pictures of the kids were still there and the mug that his son Dickie had made for him for Father's Day years before still sat on the corner of the desk full of ink pens. She wondered what this could possibly mean. Were they divorced? Liv had known they were having problems and that Kathy had taken the kids and moved to her mothers. But last she knew Elliot was trying to talk Kathy out of filing for divorce. Olivia though about this for a minute. This must have been such a hard time for him. A time when he would have need a friend, his best friend. He had needed her and she was not there for him. What if he can never forgive her? What if she can never forgive herself?


	6. 6 Home

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Six: Home) _

Later that afternoon Fin and Munch returned from their big day in court. The three of them laughed and talked like it was old times. They really made her feel happy to be back. When Elliot returned, Olivia was gone to lunch. He walked in and sat his stuff down on his desk noticing the stack of papers piled upon the once empty desk.

"Elliot! I need to see you in my office, please." Cragen said.

"What's up captain?" Elliot said, halfway knowing where this conversation was going to lead.

"I've finally got you a partner."

"Are you sure captain, maybe I'm better off working alone." Elliot couldn't help but wonder where Cragen found this one. Or if he or she could handle it. Most people are not equipped to handle this sort of work. Even being cops, most cannot deal with this day in and day out seeing the things they see and knowing the things they know.

"Well, try not to run this one off!" Cragen said.

Elliot walked out of the office and closed the door. As he turned around he spotted her walking into the room. It was Olivia. Her hair was longer and lighter with little highlights that seemed to make her big brown eyes sort of glow with warmth. He had been so worried about her. He knew why she didn't call, he knew that she couldn't. And he knew that he had once told her that he didn't want to worry about her so much anymore. There had been a time when he had thought that was a problem. But now looking at her across the room he felt himself smile for the first time in over two months. They just stood there looking into each others eyes for a few moments and in those moments it was like they were alone in the world. Elliot took a deep breath.

"Hi stranger," Olivia said with a smile as she reached in to hug him. She had worried all this time about what she would say to him and what she would do if she saw him, then when the time came everything just felt so natural.

Elliot gave her a quick hug back, then let go. Even though part of him wanted to hold on to her longer for fear of losing her again. Lately it seemed as if he was losing everyone important in his life.

"Liv, What are you doing here?" He said as she sat down on the corner of her desk.

"I work here," she said with a smile. And with that he knew she was home.


	7. 7 Friends & Foes

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Seven: Friends and Foes)_

The gang had decided to get together at a place across town for a few drinks that night. Kind of a little welcome gathering for Olivia. Things were finally starting to get back to normal in her life. Normal, except for this newfound awkwardness between she and Elliot. After three hours and about four beers later the gang found themselves sitting at a table in an almost empty bar telling stories of infamous cases, the good old days. Olivia looked at the smiling faces around her. And for the first time in a long time she felt her place in a family, this family.

Their Captain Donald Cragen was the first to excuse himself for the evening. Captain Cragen had began his battle with alcohol shortly after his wife was killed in a plane crash. Cragen had now completed a twelve step program and kicked his addiction. Liv always wondered if these nights out were tough on him being a recovering alcoholic. But if it was he never showed it. The things they all saw every day were enough to make anyone want to crawl into a bottle in search of an escape. It was a running joke that number of his empty water bottles on the table was always higher than the number of beer bottles any other member of the group was responsible for. Cragen was the father figure in this family.

Sitting across the table from Olivia was Casey Novak. Casey and Olivia had become friends while working numerous cases together over the years. Casey was the Assistant District Attorney and prosecuted many of the cased their department had worked. She had more than earned her place as a member of their team. With her briefcase and blazer draped over the back of her chair. Under the light of the lamp that dangled over their table you could see the definition between the auburn and blonde strands of her golden hair. Casey was like a sister to Olivia and the gang.

To Casey's left sat Detective John Munch. Munch had transferred in from Baltimore's Homicide Unit. In the past John had dealt solely in deceased victims. Though he adapted quickly to his co-workers here in New York, the change in the job took a while longer. Munch's way of coping with his work was to not "cope" with it at all. John's past was clouded with troubled relationships. He was an amazing Senior Detective and was damn good at his job, but also served as a reminder to her that you have to find a way to cope with the pains of life. Munch had separated his work life from his personal life to the point that he no longer had a personal life. He didn't seem to date anymore. And seemed to have given up completely on the idea of marriage after a few fail attempts. John was full of conspiracy theories and cynical comments. He put a front that made him appear rough around the edges to the point that he seemed to be miserable all of the time. He was dedicated and showed a great passion for his work and though he would probably never come right out and say it, Liv could tell that he cared deeply about his co-workers.

John's partner was a street-wise veteran of the narcotics department who had recently transferred in to Special Victims about six years earlier. Detective Odafin Tutuola, or Fin, had been a perfect match for Detective Munch. Spending many years in the underbelly of the city working the streets in narcotics, Fin, had a several connections and ways of gathering information that had proven helpful to SVU cases numerous times. On occasion Olivia had been partnered with Fin instead of Elliot. They didn't seem to have the same chemistry she had with her partner, but had always had her back.

Fin & Munch were kind of like older brothers in a way. They had always been there for her when she needed them at work. She didn't share much of her personal life with either of them, but she knew if she ever needed anything they would be there for her. They were both very protective of Olivia. They were protective of the entire "family" but possibly a little more so over her. She had thought this may have been because she was the only female detective in their group, or maybe because they knew that she didn't have any real family of her own. Her mother had passed away years earlier. And now, this was the only place she belonged.

Then there was Elliot. Olivia looked up over her right shoulder as she peeled the label from her beer bottle. As she raised her eyes they met Elliot's and she smiled. He just grinned back shaking his head. Olivia just laughed to her self, how long had he been staring at her? Her relationship with Elliot was hard to explain. Infact she was pretty sure there were no words that could thoroughly describe it. One part brother, one part friend, the only partner she had ever managed to keep for over a year, he knew everything about her and somehow still wanted to be near her. They were best friends and her bond with Elliot Stabler was closer than that of anyone else she had ever known. They had no sexual relationship. Until recently Elliot had lived with his wife Kathy and five children. Elliot was one of the few in the department who was able to make a marriage work. His trick was simple, he never talked about work at home. Sounds easy enough, right? But holding all of that emotion and pent up anger inside was not easy either. That is where Liv came in. They had both depended on their talks to get them through the years. She could only imagine how hard it would be to go home and kiss you child goodnight after busting a perp for the rape and murder of a ten year old girl. Olivia helped Elliot deal with this. Kathy knew they were close and although Liv could sometimes sense a jealous vibe coming from her, she knew that Kathy understood that she was not a threat to the marriage.

Kathy and Elliot had been together for nearly twenty years. Elliot was a Marine and he and Kathy married shortly after they found out she was pregnant with their oldest daughter Maureen. They were young and Elliot joined the police force so that he could be home more with his wife and baby. A few years later came daughter Kathleen, then the twins Richard "Dickie" and Elizabeth. But after years of spending nights alone and dealing with Elliot's sleepless nights being haunted by what he had seen at his job Kathy had decided to take the kids move in with her mother. After they had separated, Kathy realized she was pregnant with their fifth child, their now ten month old son, Eli. The couple reconciled for a while, but things just didn't seem to be working out.

Elliot had told Liv how much it bothered Kathy that he wouldn't talk to her about the things that bothered him. Somewhere in Elliot's mind this was his way of protecting her and the kids from the evil he was forced to face everyday. Just before Olivia had left to go undercover, Kathy had left Elliot for the second time and taken the children. She had mentioned wanting a divorce, but Elliot was sure they could work it out and that is what they were trying to do. As of now Olivia wasn't sure what had happened in their situation. She had only had moments to even speak to her partner and no time alone with him. She had a hundred questions about all of the things that happened while she was gone. A hundred questions she was not sure how to ask him. But that conversation would have to wait until she could get Elliot alone.

Olivia took a deep breath and then excused herself to the ladies room. As she came out and headed across the room back to the table she heard Elliot's voice behind her.

"Hey," he said.

Olivia turned around to look at him. "Hey," she replied.

"I was hoping to get the chance to talk to you alone," Elliot said.

"Um.. Okay. Well, do you want to go then?" Olivia asked.

"Okay," he replied.

And with that they said goodbye to their friends and left the bar. Elliot and Olivia took a taxi back to her apartment. Liv got out a bottle of red wine and a couple of glasses and they went up onto the roof of the apartment to catch up on the last two months. On the roof Olivia had a small patio table and four chairs. She and Elliot turned their chairs to look out across the city. New York had a bad side. But from here, at night with all the lights lit up and the muffled sounds of the busy people rushing around the streets below it was hard to see. This place had become an escape for the two of them. Sometimes late at night after a particularly troublesome case when neither of them could sleep, they would come up here and look out over the city. The view kind of served as a reminder of the beauty that still remained. They had held many conversations here.

"How have you been?" Elliot asked her.

"Good, I guess. It was strange being away from everyone for so long. Who would have thought I'd miss the city? What about you?"

"Okay. Things were a little rough for a while, but it's all working out." He took a deep breath then exhaled slowly trying to relax. Then he turned to look at Olivia sitting across the table from him staring down into her glass and could tell something was on her mind.

"What's going on Liv? Is everything okay?" He studied her with concern waiting for her to raise her eyes to meet his, but it never happened. "Liv?"

"Yeah, yeah, everything is fine. I just… this is quite an adjustment, you know? But it's nice to be home."

Elliot reached across the table and placed his hand on top of hers in support.

"I'm glad you're back," he said softly as he noticed the glisten of tears on her cheek in the moonlight. "It drove me crazy, not knowing where you were or being able to talk to you. Not knowing if you were safe."

Finally she tilted her head and stared at him with heavy and exhausted eyes. She took a deep breath as he reached up and brushed a tear from her cheek. "I missed you," she whispered softly.

"I missed you, too." He replied. "Talk to me, Olivia."

"I've just felt… so alone. In a strange place, pretending to be someone else. I had no one who really knew me, no one to talk to. And so much has happened here since I left. There were so many times that I wanted to call and just hear your voice. Just talk to you for a minute. In eight years of working together, I don't think I had gone a total of two days with out talking to you. Then all of a sudden, I couldn't. For sixty-three days I was with out my best friend. And I know a lot of things have gone on here with you. A lot of hard times. And I wasn't here for you. I let you down Elliot. And I'm sorry. I thought about you a lot while I was gone. A couple of times, I even tried to call. But someone would walk up and I couldn't talk. Or I didn't know what to say to you, so I didn't say anything. Instead, I just hung up the phone."

"I knew it was you. I don't know how, I just had a feeling. But I somehow knew. It scared the Hell out of me at first. I was worried, maybe you were trying to call for help. I had no clue where you were and no way to get to you if you did need me. But I knew that you wouldn't have taken the job if you didn't know that you could handle it. I knew the F.B.I. was watching over you. It just made me nervous, you know? But you are back now. And we can start putting things back together. What you did, Liv, helped solve a murder. You were right where you were supposed to be."

"Elliot if I learned one thing the entire time I was gone it was that _this_ is where I am supposed to be. I guess somehow I just though life here would freeze and everything would be exactly the same when I came back. But everything has changed."

"Things were different. A lot of things were different. I, for the first time was forced to face the fact that my marriage of twenty years was probably over. I had to work with a couple of different partners. And in the long run I realized I am not the easiest person to work with."

"Was it really that bad?" She looked up at him and smiled. Somehow the feeling that he needed her made her feel a little better.

"It was horrible." They both laughed. "The first guy," he continued, "well, lets just say that we had completely different work habits. We were always stepping on each others toes. We were just way to different. We had no common ground to stand on."

"You and I are completely different," she said with a smile.

"But you and I have a balance. We complement each other. With him it was a total disaster."

"What about Detective Beck?" Olivia focused all of her attention on Elliot's facial expression when she asked him this question. She knew that his expression would tell her more than he would ever say in words. "The two of you worked pretty well together, didn't you?"

Elliot turned his eyes down as if hiding them from her. He wouldn't lie to her, he never did. Not that it would do him any good, because she knew him well enough to tell when he wasn't being truthful of hiding something from her.

"Detective Beck and I worked very well together. But it wasn't the same as it was with you and I. Liv, we have known each other so long…." Elliot paused for a moment fighting back a lump in his throat. "We're more than just partners, we're like family, we are best friends. I have never worked with any partner as long as I have with you. When you left, I didn't just lose my partner. I lost my friend. Dani and I worked well together. And for a little while we had a pretty good friendship, too. But going through all of this. I was in a lonely place and I found comfort in her friendship. But before long it was like it wasn't just a friendship anymore. I think it was just dealing with Kathy and this divorce thing. I don't know. Dani and I dated, Liv. Not long, it was more of a fling. But for a short time we did have a relationship. And it is strange, because as much as I wanted this new beginning with her…. I felt like I was cheating."

"Elliot, if Kathy was filing for divorce then you weren't cheating on her. You had no reason to feel guilty." Olivia could not believe she was hearing her voice say these words. She wanted Elliot to be happy. But she for some reason didn't want Dani Beck in the picture.

"No Liv, I felt like I was cheating on you."

Olivia looked up at him. What the hell had just happened here.

"Elliot, I just want you to be happy. Why should I mind if you found someone else? I mean, that is what friends want for each other right?"

All of a sudden Olivia could feel tears streaming down both of her cheeks. Why was she crying? She honestly wanted nothing more than whatever it took to make Elliot happy. Part of her was even glad to see him getting over Kathy. She tried as hard as she could to stop the tears before he noticed. She had no idea why they were even there. She got up from her chair and walked over to the ledge to look down at the city street below. She couldn't let him see her like this.

It seemed for a moment that Olivia's plan was working. Elliot hadn't noticed her crying, he was still sitting in the chair behind her as she stood here racking her brain trying to figure out what had just happened to her.

"I know," he said. "It's kind of silly. We only saw each other a few times. We kissed, but that is pretty much all that happened. I think we both wanted more. We had talked about going away together. Like for a weekend or something, but things were moving so fast. Then we got into a really tough case. Dani got emotionally attached to a this girl, the kid was damaged so badly by the things she had been through. One night while Dani slept the girl set her apartment on fire. No one was harmed, but I think that was when she saw for the first time what we really face every day. Dani, Detective Beck, transferred out of SVU shortly after that."

"Elliot, I'm sorry." She heard Elliot stand up and walk over toward her.

"Well, nothing really happened…"

"That's really none of my business," she heard herself almost snap at him. She didn't mean to be so sharp, but she didn't want to hear another word. Infact, for some reason she found herself almost angry at him for even making her think about it in the first place! Olivia, was completely confused about the way she felt. She was scared and angry and nervous and had no idea why. This was Elliot! The only one person in the entire world who understood her. The only one she could really talk to, say anything to and he never judged her. Yet now she found herself afraid to tell him all of the things that had been on her mind. Olivia hated this new found insecurity she had about herself when she was around Elliot now. It was never like this before. Why couldn't things just be like they were before? Because they had changed. Everything had changed. The moment she left, she lost everything they had once shared. And now she was too stubborn to come out and tell that she needed him. That she just wanted things to go back to the way they were before. But inside she was terrified, that it would never be the same again.

"What is going on with you? Liv, it's like you have been avoiding talking to me since you got back." Elliot said as he turned her around to see the tears pouring from her eyes. "Hey?"

Olivia looked up at him almost trembling as she drew in a deep breath. Elliot put his hand on her shoulder. He had no idea what had brought this on, he had never seen Liv this secretive. What was is she wasn't telling him? Had something happened to her in Oregon? He could tell when he looked at her that there was something she was hiding from him. She was not acting at all like herself.

"Liv please, tell me what is going on. How can I help you if I don't know what the problem is? You are scaring me."

"It's nothing. Really. I don't even know why I'm crying. It's stupid really."

"What is stupid?"

Olivia pulled herself free of his hands, she was still a little angry and for this moment didn't want him touching her. She turned her back to him and wiped her face with her hands to push the tears away. Another deep breath. She had to get control of herself.

"Olivia?"

"What?" She shouted as she turned around to face him again. Oh God, she thought, here it comes. And she was right, every emotion she had kept locked up inside her this entire time was about to break loose. "You want to know? Do you really want to know? How could you do this?" She stopped herself there before she said something she would later regret. Shouting at Elliot over something she didn't even understand herself wasn't going to fix anything at all.

"How could I do what?"

Olivia, sat down on the building ledge and just stared down at her shoes for a second. It was too late, now. She couldn't not say anything. She placed her hands the ledge on each side of her and looked up at turned her head to look at Elliot once again.

"Why is it okay for you to care so much about Dani? For you to get so close to her, but you push me away? There were moments, Elliot. With you and me. I know you felt it too, I saw it in your eyes. But we never let anything happen, we were partners and that came first. I understood that. But…. Why can you love her, but not me?" She whispered softly as she placed her hand against his chest. She could feel the warmth of the tears on her face once again, but this time she didn't care. Infact, she found them almost comforting.

Elliot just stood there with a look in his eyes that she had never seen before. Part remorse and part shock, he wasn't sure what to say. She was right. Somehow, in some way he had betrayed her. Things were uncomfortably quiet for a while, but neither of them was sure what to say to the other. Elliot just stood there and watched her cry. He had never felt so bad in his life. He didn't realize that she had felt like this. Yes, they had flirted with each other before and he was definitely attracted to her. But a romantic relationship between them had never been an option. Not sure of what to say to make things right between them, Elliot placed his hand against her cheek and looked into her eyes.

"I'm so sorry." He whispered. "I never meant to hurt you. I would never in a million years do anything I thought was going to hurt you."

She looked back at him with sadness in her eyes as she placed her hand against his. "I know that." She said softly. "It's been a long night, I'm going to go to bed."

Elliot watched her as she gather the wine bottle and glassed from the table and headed back inside. He stood alone on the roof for a few minutes trying to think of something to say to make this right, but he could think of nothing. As he walked back through her apartment and gathered his jacket and keys to leave they hardly looked at each other. He felt awful for the way he had made her feel. Neither of them slept at all that night.


	8. 8 Accompaniment

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Eight: Accompaniment)_

The next day at work was a long and quiet one. Neither of them was sure how to face the other, so they didn't. Infact they hardly looked at each other or spoke all day. In the early hours of morning laying in bed exhausted both physically and emotionally, Olivia found it impossible to sleep. After about four hours of trying she gave up and decided to go for a walk.

Across town Elliot found himself alone in the apartment he had gotten after the last time he and Kathy split up. He was still having trouble believing that he let this situation with Liv get this out of control. The last thing he would ever want to do is hurt her. Next to his children, Olivia was the most important person in his life. He had to find a way to fix this.

Elliot rolled over to look at the clock 3:47 am. Just then he heard the buzz of the door bell. Elliot got out of bed and slid on a pair of jeans he had laying on the top of his dresser. As he pulled a sweatshirt over his head and walked down the stairs he heard the door bell buzz a second time.

"Yeah!" He shouted as he jerked the door open not sure of who it could be at this hour. On the front step stood Olivia with a cup of coffee in each hand. They just stared at each other for few seconds.

"I figured you'd be awake," she said quietly.

"I haven't slept in two days."

"I can tell," she said handing him a coffee cup. "Walk with me.

"Olivia, it's almost three in the morning. And it's freezing out here!"

"I like the cold air! It helps me think," she said as she started down the front steps.

"Okay. At least you are talking to me," Elliot replied as he followed her.

They had only walked about half a block when Olivia stopped on the sidewalk in front of him and turned around to face him.

"I wasn't _not_ talking to you. I just had a lot to think about. I don't really know what that was the other night. I know why things aren't like that between us. And I'm okay with that. I just…. I don't know. I guess I felt like you didn't need me anymore. You had a different partner and a new friend. A lot happened around here while I was gone. Elliot, I am happy that you found someone. I hated watching you hurt so much over Kathy. You needed this. Then I managed to make a total fool of myself and had that little breakdown. I am really sorry."

Somehow they had managed to turn around and walk back the half a block and were now standing in front of Elliot's apartment again. They sat stood on the steps and he reached out to hold her hand.

"Don't ever be sorry for telling the truth about the way you feel. You were right Liv. I can't look at you an honestly say that it had never crossed my mind, that I had never wondered what it would be like to kiss you. If I did I'd be lying. But that is as far as it has ever gone. We never attempted to take our relationship to that level because we are partners. I crossed a line with her. One that I am still not sure I should have crossed. I have been replaying every word you said in my head over and over all day. I know I left you feeling hurt and betrayed, but that is the last thing I would ever want to do. Olivia, besides my kids, you are the only person in this world I even give a damn about. We are partners and best friends and in so many ways I am closer to you than any lover I have ever had. If we ever dated and it went bad… If I ever screwed it up… it was too much to chance," Elliot stopped for a moment to look into her eyes. Olivia was holding her breath watching each word as it formed and rolled off his lips.

"Liv, I can't lose you. That is why I never acted on any feelings or moments we might have had. I would do anything for you. And there is nothing that you can't tell me. Don't ever be afraid to talk to me. We have to be completely honest with each other. No secrets. That's what makes what you and I have so special. We have an unconditional friendship, no matter what we are always here for each other and I refuse to give that up."

She smiled as they both chuckled then he caught her eye again.

"I love you, Olivia Benson. I always have and I always will." As she smiled at him again he could see the tears welling up in her eyes. Elliot placed his palm against Olivia's palm and slid his fingers between hers. "Some love is stronger than anything romance or sex can provide. It is pure, limitless and real. You mean more to me than anything in the world. Just tell me that we are going to be okay." With that she felt a tear slip from her cheek. Elliot pulled her into his arms and hugged her, he held her tightly in his arms for just a minute then kissed the top of her head.

In that moment Olivia felt safe for the first time in months. She hugged him back and nestled the side of her face in against the thickness of his sweatshirt. "I love you to, El," she said softly then stared into the blue of his eyes.

"Are we going to be okay?" He asked her and she could now see tears in his eyes.

"I think so," she replied.

"It's late. Let me grab my keys and I will take you home." Elliot ran back up the steps and grabbed his car keys off the kitchen counter. As they got into his car he looked at her and said "what are you doing out this late?"

"I couldn't sleep, so I went for a walk." She replied.

"Liv, your apartment is at least twenty blocks away. You walked all that way at three o'clock in the morning?"

"Well, no. I just walked around for about six blocks thinking things through. Then I was freezing so I stopped to get the coffee, that was when I decided it was silly for me to be there alone wishing I could talk to you when I knew you were not sleeping either. Then I got in a cab and came over here."

Elliot smiled at her. "You see, this is why you and I make such good partners. You know how I like my coffee." Olivia laughed. "You think I'm joking, but I'm serious. Detective Beck and I worked together for almost eight weeks and she still hadn't gotten it right. "That and you put up me."

"Someone has to, the department is running out detectives who have not worked with you. They are running out of options in finding you a new partner."

"Then maybe I should just keep my old one," he said as he started the car and the two of them laughed. "I guess you're stuck with me."

"I could think of worse people I could be stuck with," she replied with a smile.

"Oh yeah, who?"

"Dani Beck," she said with a sly smirk.

"Hey, now." by now they were both laughing and Olivia knew that everything was going to be okay.


	9. 9 Family

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Nine: Family)_

Things had been much better between them the past few weeks. Olivia had settled back into her old life and she and Elliot had managed to close several cases, strengthening their track record. Live had noticed a new balance that seemed to center in Elliot now. He had adapted much better than she had expected to being away from his children so much. Though Elliot had always worked long hours with no particular schedule he had always made certain he made time for his family. In Olivia's eyes Elliot was an amazing father and husband. He was always truthful to Kathy and although he was away from her a lot he gave her no reason to worry of infidelity, Elliot was a one woman at a time kind of man. Olivia had seen watched him sometimes with his children how tender and loving he was with them, always showering them with hugs and telling them how much he loved them. Even through the trying times of teenage mistakes, Elliot tried hard to keep communication with them and be understanding. Infact, it was watching him with his children that had made her wonder what kind of mother she would make.

Olivia had never really thought that much of starting a family until recently. After witnessing Eli's birth in the back of an Ambulance on the way to the hospital after a car accident, Liv had found a new curiosity for babies. This miraculous opportunity in her life had sparked a longing she would have previously thought alien to her, she had realized her own strong desire to become a mother. And though she tried hard to ignore these feelings in hope they would retreat, she was having no such luck.

Infact these thoughts had somehow managed to seep into her dreams and subconscious leaving Liv with an unconquered feeling of emptiness. She would often catch herself watching mothers out in public with their young children and her mind would wonder away to a world where everything was fair and just. In this fantasy world Liv would have found her perfect soul mate, possibly a handsome doctor or a successful lawyer. She would have given up her career a couple of years earlier when they married to help make their home. And by now she would probably be pregnant with second of three children. Three, she wondered. Why that seemed the perfect number she was not quite certain, but in the dreams she always seemed to have three children. Two boys and a girl, she thought to herself. And a handsome successful husband, a perfect family.

Olivia glanced down into the coffee cup sitting on the edge of her desk, then raised it toward her face to smell the black liquid she had filled it with hours earlier to decide if it was salvageable.

"Are you still here?" She asked Elliot as she poured the stale coffee down the drain and poured a fresh cup. "I thought this was your weekend with the kids?"

"It is…. I'm running a little late, but I am almost out of here," he replied as he re-stacked the files on his desk neatly and grabbed his jacket from the back of his chair.

"Benson and Stabler, it seems our suspect in the Theresa Tulley case has returned home from his business trip. I would like you to get him in here for questioning now," Cragen scalded handing a yellow sticky note to Olivia.

"So much for getting out of here at a decent hour," Elliot said as he tossed placed the jacket in his hand back over his chair.

"No, Elliot, I can get this. You go. You have not had the kids in three weeks," Olivia knew how much Elliot's time with his children meant to him and how it broke his heart not to get to see them more often then he did.

"I'll go with her, El," Fin said as he grabbed the keys from his pocket. "You go get your time with your kids, before they get too old to spend quality time with dear old dad.

Elliot laughed at that and gathered his things to leave once again. "Okay," he said looking at Olivia, but I want a full report later."

Olivia nodded her head in agreement. Then she and Fin set out to find Darryl Handler, a man suspected of raping his girlfriends fourteen year old sister. A fact only complicated by a complete lack of physical evidence. This was going to be a tough case, but one she was sure they would solve.

That night after work Olivia was laying in bed reading a book, trying to unwind before hopefully catching at least four or five hours of sleep before she had to get up and do it all again. Her mind kept drifting off into her little dream world again until finally she closed the book and picked up the case file from the nightstand. She reviewed all of the pictures and notes they had gathered the last few days, then remembered promising Elliot an update.

Liv reached across the bed, picked up the phone from the charger and dialed Elliot's number.

"It's about time," he said when he answered quick to get down to business. "Did you get anything good?"

"I got an alibi," she replied.

"That isn't good," Elliot said quietly.

"Fin's checking it out, he's supposed to let me know tomorrow. We were only about ten minutes into questioning and he layered up. So it was kind of a dead end. His attorney said they would prepare a statement for us and have it on my desk by noon tomorrow. I don't have a good feeling about this one, El."

"No, I guess he needed to buy some time to make up some big lie to cover his ass! And his shameless lawyer doesn't seem to care that what his scum ball client has done to a fourteen year old child is going to do to her for the rest of her life," he replied.

"Rough night with the kids?"

"I guess you could say that. Dickie didn't come because of a soccer game, the baby is sick and cried the entire time he was here, I have not seen Maureen since she moved into the dorms and left dinner early to go on a date, broke curfew, then proceeded to come back here and tell me that she is old enough she should be able to stay out as late as she wants because her mother lets her." Elliot sounded exhausted.

"Kathy lets her stay out as late as she wants?"

"Of course not. She's just been playing us against each other a lot lately, anyway I took them all home about an hour ago. I know this is hard on them, too. I miss being there with them, you know? I miss going into their rooms and kissing them good night after a long night at work. I don't see them much anymore and when I do get them it seems like the time goes by so fast," hearing Elliot talk about his time with his children made her happy. She loved that he was happy, finally after all of the heartache over this divorce and the custody issues it finally seemed like his troubles were resolved.

"Hey, Elliot, can I ask you something?" She paused for a moment to think it through. Was she sure she wanted to have this conversation with him? Once she did, the topic of her and motherhood would be open for discussion between them for a least the next few days and there would be no closing it.

"What's up, Liv?"

"Do you think you could ever see me with kids?" It was said now and there was nothing she could do to take it back. "I know it seems kind of silly," Olivia paused again long enough to tuck a stray piece of hair behind her ear. "I have just…. I don't know, been thinking. What is things were different? What if I had gotten married and had a family?" It was killing her that he hadn't said anything yet, even though she really hadn't given him the chance to speak.

"I think you would make a wonderful mother, Liv."

She felt a smile spread slowly across her face. "Really?"

"Yeah, I mean look how good you are with my kids. And when we work with children at work…. It is almost like you have a special power when it comes to kids. And they seem to love you."

"Thanks Elliot," she said softly with a smile.

"You got something you want to tell me?" He laughed.

"No, I was just thinking. You know, what if?"

"You get some sleep and I will talk to you tomorrow," he said.

"Yeah," she said quietly hanging up the phone.

Olivia placed the phone back on the night stand and settled back into her bed. She turned out the light and laid there in the dark thinking about the words he had said. No one knew her like Elliot did. Infact, in many ways he knew her better than she knew herself. The fact that he thought she would be a good mother pleased her. The truth was, something about having children of her own had always frightened Olivia. Perhaps due to her difficult relationship she once shared with her own mother.

Over the next few weeks Olivia noticed Elliot had brought up the subject of her having children numerous times. He even started bringing his own children around her more. Olivia was not exactly blind to his new behavior.

One day while they were sitting in the car watching a suspect trying to make a drug deal, Elliot turned to her out of the blue and said "I think you should do it."

"What?" Olivia replied, half sure of what he was talking about.

"I think you should start a family, you deserve to be happy, Liv."

"Um, thanks. I think. What exactly brought this up?" She asked.

"I was just thinking, if that is what you want, you should go for it."

"Even if I did want a baby now, I would kind of have to find a man first."

"Well, what about that guy you dated a few months ago? David…. Somebody. He seemed nice. Owned his own business and was building a house, wasn't he?"

"Elliot, David is gay. I didn't date him. I went out to dinner with him a couple of times. We went to college together and he was in town. We hadn't seen each other in a couple of years. Actually, he was asking me about you!" Olivia smiled at Elliot as if giving him a taste of his own medicine.

"What about Steve?" He asked, refusing to give up the battle before it had begun.

"Who is Steve?" She asked racking her brain.

"Steve Davis, the guy who did my taxes last year. Remember, I gave you his card. He's single!" Elliot looked pleased.

Olivia wasn't quite sure if he was joking or honestly thought she wanted to date his accountant Steve. "It isn't funny Elliot."

"I'm not trying to be funny. How long has it been since you went on a real date?"

"I don't know, a few months, I guess. I have been busy at work."

"You have been in hiding. Look Liv, all you do is think of everyone else. If you are ever really going to be happy you have to think of yourself every now and then. You need to get out and meet someone," Elliot looked at her and watched her trying not to focus on what he was saying to her. He wanted her to be happy and it had been a long time since he had seen her in a relationship.

"Look Elliot, I know you are just trying to help. But I am going to say this in the nicest way I know how….. Back off. When I am ready to date, I will date. You don't have to keep trying to set me up. I'm a big girl."

"I know," he replied. "I just don't like seeing you alone all of the time."

"Awww. That is sweet," she said as she hugged his shoulder and smiled.

"Hey," Fin called over the radio from the car behind them. "If you two are done making out, maybe we could take this guy today."

And with that they jumped out of the car and took off on a foot chase after the guy. Elliot followed him down a back alley while Olivia doubled back to get the car and cut them off at the street where she knew Elliot was going to run him out. She pulled around in the car and waited for her partner. A few moments later Elliot still had not come out.

"Did they come back your way, Fin?" Olivia called over the radio.

"Negative, we have the entrance blocked off. They have to come out your way," Fin replied.

Now Olivia was really getting nervous. She shut off the car and drew her gun. It was dusk and hard to see down the dark alley way between the old brick buildings. She held up a flashlight and beamed it off garbage dumpsters and but saw nothing.

"He's got a knife, Liv." She heard Elliot call to her and then she could hear foot steps coming toward her. Though she could not yet see the man, she knew he was running toward her with Elliot hot on his heels. Olivia ducked behind an over piled dumpster and waited for the right moment to play the element of surprise in her favor. She heard the man running and just as he approached her she stepped out hitting him in the nose with the handle of her flashlight. Olivia then tackled the guy getting him to the ground. As the two of them struggled, Elliot put his knee into the mans back and cuffed his hands behind his back then pulled him back to his feet to lead him back to the car.

"You, okay?" He asked Liv.

"Yup," she said still breathing a little heavy from taking down the criminal. They walked the man back to the car and as Elliot lowered the mans head to put him in the back seat he noticed he had torn his shirt in the scuffle.

"You're bleeding," Olivia said. "You should have that checked out."

"I'm fine, just a scratch." Elliot insisted.

Olivia moved in closer to examine the wound. "No, El. This is kind of deep, I think he got you with the knife. You might need a couple of stitches."

"Liv, I'm fine."

"Elliot, don't be a baby. Look Munch and Fin can take this creep in, I will take you to get this checked out. Don't argue with me!"

The wait in the emergency room seemed to take forever. Elliot called his kids to explain to them what had happened and tell them he was okay. A few minutes later Kathleen showed up at the emergency room to wait with them. Finally after almost a two hour wait they went into a small room. The doctor came around to look at the wound, but Elliot noticed he spent more of his time eyeing Olivia. Kathleen however as not the least bit subtle with her opinion of him.

"Oh, he's hot," she said staring at him across the room.

"And way too old for you," Elliot replied.

"Oh daddy, come on don't you want me to marry a handsome doctor?" Kathleen asked.

"Yeah, in about ten years!" Elliot replied. Olivia, had given up waiting on the hospital staff and had begun to inspect the gash in Elliot's shoulder herself when the doctor walked over. She didn't really even seem to notice the doctor, but he could not take his eyes off Olivia. Twelve stitches and a tetanus shot later they were finally ready to go. Elliot dropped Kathleen off at her car about half a block away then proceeded to drive Olivia home.

"Thank you," he said parked in front of her apartment building just before she got out of the car.

"No problem," she said with a tired smile, "Take it easy, I'll see you tomorrow."

"Hey, Liv?" He called to her.

"Yeah?"

"Don't be mad," he replied.

"Why would I be… Elliot, what did you do?" She asked almost afraid of what his answer would be.

"I gave that doctor your phone number."

"What?" She stood quiet for a second waiting for him to laugh, but he didn't. She hoped this was some kind of bad joke, but it wasn't. "You are serious?"

"Yes."

"What on earth would possess you to do that?" She felt mortified.

"You heard Kathleen, he's a catch. He's attractive and every girl wants a doctor."

"Elliot, for all you know he could have been married!"

"Calm down. He wasn't wearing a ring, besides he told me he was single."

"When did he tell you that?" She now stood on the sidewalk with a worried look in her eye and her arms crossed in front of her.

"When he asked me if you were single," Elliot said with a mischievous grin.

Olivia just stood there for a minute with a look that was half panic and half confusion.

"Good night Olivia," Elliot said as he started the car and pulled away.

Liv walked upstairs and got ready for bed. The more she thought about what had gone on that evening the more it frustrated, yet amused her at the same time. What was Elliot thinking? Before long she realized that her thoughts had strayed from her aggravation for Elliot to trying to remember the first name on Dr. Parker's name tag. Nick, she thought to herself as she smiled with a sigh. He was kind of cute. Olivia rolled over and turned out the light.


	10. 10 Settling Differences

**Immediate Danger**

**(Chapter Ten: Settling Differences)**

_**It had been just over two months since Olivia had first met Dr. Nick Parker and they had started dating shortly after. Olivia was actually kind of shocked that a guy Elliot had set her up with had turned out to be such a good guy. He was handsome and smart and treated her nice, everything she had been looking for in a man. In the past Olivia had been hesitant to let her guard down and get close to a man. Because of her past and her job she often had trouble trusting people in general. But with Nick it seemed different. He had been so patient with her, allowing their relationship to move slowly into the romance they now shared. Olivia had not allowed herself to care this much about a man in a long time. Normally on a first date he would ask her about her job, his reaction to what she told him was usually enough to prevent a second date. Most guys either shied away and never called her again or leaned in just a little too interested in the gory details and made her nervous. Needless to say, it was pretty much a lose-lose situation. **_

_**But Nick was different. When he would ask her how her day was over dinner and a glass of wine, Olivia felt comfortable talking to him. She didn't always share details with him, but she knew he was there to talk to if she needed someone. They had agreed after their first date to take things slow. Olivia hadn't been serious with anyone in months and Nick had lost his fiancé in a car accident nine months earlier and was just starting to date again. And now after numerous dates, they still had not been intimate. **_

_**Liv was supposed to meet Nick for dinner tonight. He had been out of town for four days at a conference in Chicago and they had only been able to talk a few times on the phone. She really missed him. Olivia had been doing a lot of thinking about their relationship and now as she stood in front of her bathroom mirror staring into the reflection of her own eyes she was thinking this could be the one. Olivia checked her make up and brushed her hair behind her ear. On the bed she had a small pile of outfits and she was trying to decide what to wear to have dinner with Nick. As she stood there looking down at the pile of clothing on her bed her cell phone rang.**_

"_**Hey El," she said as she opened the phone. She hadn't bothered to look, but she had a feeling it was him.**_

"_**Hey. Big date tonight, huh?" He said.**_

"_**Yup," she said with a sigh. "I'm getting ready now."**_

"_**What's on your mind?" He asked.**_

"_**Nothing," she said quietly as she sat down on the edge of the bed. But Elliot knew better. He could tell by the sound of her voice that she was needing to talk about something.**_

"_**Liv, are you going to make me drag it out of you?" Elliot asked. But Olivia was quiet and didn't answer him. "Olivia, do you want me to come over there for a little while?"**_

"_**No, Elliot. I'm okay. I guess I'm just nervous about tonight."**_

_**By now Elliot had turned his car around and was almost to Olivia's apartment. "So let's talk about it." He said.**_

"_**I'm not sure there is really anything to talk about," Olivia replied as her doorbell rang. Liv walked into the living room and opened the door to find Elliot standing on her front porch.**_

"_**Spill it," he said as he closed his phone and stepped inside.**_

"_**I don't know. It's just we have been dating for two months and I like him. I really like him. He's smart, he's funny, he is attractive. In so many ways he is everything I have been looking for in a guy."**_

"_**Then what's the problem?" Elliot said as he sat down on the white sofa.**_

"_**Elliot," she said as she looked at him with tears in her eyes, "I think I'm falling in love with him."**_

"_**That's great Liv," he replied as he nudged her arm with his. **_

_**Olivia took a deep breath. "I have not done this in so long, I'm not really even sure how to…."**_

_**Elliot chuckled. "It's like riding a bike Liv, it isn't something you forget."**_

"_**No, I didn't mean…. well yes, that too, I guess. But I mean, do I tell him that I am falling for him? What if I tell him and it pushes him away?" Olivia looked into Elliot's eyes as if they held the answer to this very complex question.**_

"_**I don't know," he said not knowing what to tell her. "Look Liv, all you can do is follow your heart. If you love him, tell him. Hopefully he will say it back. And as far a sex, you're a big girl."**_

"_**Elliot, I really don't want to have a sex talk with you right now," she said cutting him off.**_

"_**Look relax, I'm sure everything is going to be fine. Nick is a good guy and he cares about you. If things move forward, that is wonderful. But if you are comfortable where you are, it is okay to stay there, too." Elliot looked at her staring at him in realization.**_

"_**I guess I am just afraid of letting someone in, afraid of being hurt again. Look around us Elliot, all we see every day is pain. And somehow, so far I have managed to block it all out, all of the hurt and suffering in the world. I closed myself off for so long. I want to let him be close to me, I want to let him in. It is just such a big risk, you know. If I let this move into something serious, then I have so much more to lose. But is it really fair to him for me to keep such a distance?" Olivia took a deep breath and pushed her hair back away from her face. **_

"_**Ask yourself what you want. You can't live for other people Olivia, in the world we live in we are lucky to keep ourselves alive. It is different for me, I have children, it is my responsibility to worry about them. But right now you need to make sure that the life decisions that you make are for your best interest." Elliot reached over and squeezed her hand and she gave him a weary smile. "If you love him and you want to build a life with him, go for it. Honey, you deserve to be happy. You deserve to find the love of your life and have romance and get married and have babies and get your Happily Ever After. But he can't love you like that if you can't open up and let him in. All I want is for you to be happy. But if it doesn't work out, I'm going to be here too. You know that right?" Elliot wasn't sure if he had helped the situation any at all, but look in her eyes told him that he had at least made her feel better and that made everything worth it. "Where is he taking you?"**_

"_**This place across town where we had our first date," she said as she stood up and glanced again at the heaping pile of clothing on her bed.**_

"_**Fancy?" Elliot asked.**_

"_**Yes," she replied.**_

"_**The black one," he said picking up a black mini dress.**_

"_**That isn't too short? I don't want to be confused with the working girls," Olivia looked at him with a smile.**_

"_**It's sexy, but classy. I have seen you in it and you look beautiful, you want the man to notice you right. Trust me, he will notice. "**_

"_**I'm not sure what to do with my hair," she mumbled as she made her way back to the mirror and pulled her hair back in her hands mimicking a pony tail. **_

"_**Can I make a suggestion?" Elliot stood behind her watching her in the mirror and she nodded in agreement. "Do that thing where you pull it up in the back, then let the little pieces kind of fall around the sides of your face." Elliot turned her to face him and placed his hand behind her head and pulled her hair back to show her what he was talking about. He twisted a few if the stray strands of hair around his fingers to convince them to lay where he wanted them. He then brushed his fingers through her bangs and let them fall at an angle over her right eye. "Something like that," he said as she looked up at him and their eyes met. Olivia quickly turned her attention to the mirror and looked at what he had done. "Then wear those long earrings," he continued, "really classy look and it brings out your eyes."**_

_**Olivia grabbed a clip off the back of the sink and put it into place where Elliot had been holding her hair up. "Since when are you good at fixing women's hair?" She asked as she turned around to look at him again, "this is actually pretty good."**_

"_**I have three daughters and one bathroom, you learn these things when you have that many women in the house."**_

_**Olivia looked down at her watch. **_

"_**I have to get dressed," she said as she brushed past him. She wasn't shy around Elliot and didn't even seem to notice him in the room when she stripped down to her bra and panties before she stepped into the form fitting black dress. She reached behind her and zipped the dress then unhooked her bra and threw it on the bed. Elliot just watched her as she zipped around him gathering earrings and a necklace and putting them on, then ducked into her large closet and returned with a black pair of stiletto heels and slipped into them. "Perfume," she said as she approached him with two different bottles. "Which one?" She raised each bottle for him to smell.**_

"_**This one," Elliot said and watched as she misted it in the air then stepped into the fog. **_

"_**Okay," Olivia said as she stood looking in the mirror, "how do I look?"**_

"_**Amazing," Eliot replied unable to take his eyes off her.**_

"_**Thanks El," she said with a smile.**_

"_**Well, I'm going to go. It looks like you have everything under control here," he said walking toward her front door. "Just try to be confident, don't get nervous. Look into his eyes and tell him how you feel. Be safe," he said as he smiled at her. "If things go well, use a condom."**_

"_**Elliot! Okay, I've got it. I don't need a sex talk from my father." Olivia grabbed Elliot by the elbow and pushed him toward the now open door.**_

"_**Seriously Liv, good luck. Call me if you need me….. Call me if you don't. Let me know how things go. I'm sure everything will be great, you look beautiful," he said looking into her dark brown eyes then he leaned over and kissed her on the forehead. **_

"_**Elliot," she said as he stepped out the door. "Thank you," Olivia smiled and squeezed his hand then closed the door, Nick would be here to pick her up any minute. **_


	11. 11 Tender Kisses

_**Immediate Danger**_

_**(Chapter Eleven: Tender Kisses)**_

**It was just after nine o'clock as Olivia re-applied her lipstick and checked her hair in the ladies room mirror before returning to the table. Nick looked particularly handsome in a suit and tie. They had talked about going to see a movie and then having dinner, but Nick called her and changed their plans earlier that day. So here they were in a fancy romantic restaurant eating caviar, drinking champagne and dancing to romantic music. This was the place he had taken her two months earlier on their first date, although it seemed much more romantic now that they were actually a couple. Olivia had something important to tell nick tonight and this place was exactly what she needed to give her the confidence to tell him.**

**Olivia stopped on her way back to the table just to stare at him, he was a vary attractive man she thought smiling to herself. She took a deep breath and approached the table. Before she could sit down Nick stood up and pulled her chair out for her. Olivia smiled and stared at him with loving eyes. **

"**Have I told you how beautiful you look tonight?" He said with a smile.**

"**Twice," she replied with a grin, "but I like hearing it."**

"**Dance with me," he said taking her hand in his from across the table and standing up. "I want to show you off, make all of these other guys jealous."**

**Olivia was not used to being showered with this much attention from anyone. Normally it would make her self conscious and uncomfortable when a man commented so much on her looks, but not tonight. She was finally in love, finally happy and she wanted Nick to feel the same. **

**Nick held he close to him as they danced to soft, slow romantic music. Olivia closed her eyes and nestled her head into his shoulder, it felt so good to be held. She couldn't remember the last time a man made her feel this way.**

"**Olivia," Nick whispered in her ear softly as he drew her arms up around his neck.**

"**Yes," she almost cooed as she looked up into his green eyes.**

"**Kiss me," he said raising her chin with his thumb and leaning into her until their lips finally touched. **

**They had shared many kisses before, but none like this. The power in this kiss was like nothing she had ever experienced before. Olivia knew then that there was no way she was wrong about the way she felt about him. This was it! She was in love!**

**The cab ride back to her apartment was a quiet one. They sat in the back seat as he held her hand tight in his and just stared into each other's eyes. They both knew what they wanted. And Olivia had never wanted anything more. Nick walked her to her door and kissed her goodnight. But they couldn't seem to stop kissing. **

"**Olivia," he said as he placed his jacket around her shoulders and leaned in to kiss her again. Nick leaned her back against the dark brick of the building and kissed her again. "Baby, I should go."**

"**No, you should stay," she said softly gazing into his eyes. "Come up for a while."**

"**Really?" He said smiling at her.**

"**Yeah," she said softly.**

"**Give me a second," he said raising her hand to kiss it then walking over to pay the cab driver.**

**Olivia held him by the hand and lead him up the staircase to her apartment. Inside she opened a bottle of wine and poured two glasses. Nick sat down on the sofa as Olivia turned on some music and kicked of her high heels. She lit a few candles around the room and dimmed the lights then handed him a wine glass and sat down beside him. She took a drink for courage then sat her glass on the edge of the coffee table. **

"**I'm glad you decided to come in," she said smiling at him.**

"**So am I," Nick said seductively as he placed his glass on the table beside hers and leaned in to kiss her again. His kisses were strong and tasted like wine, Olivia wanted more. Before long found herself underneath him on the sofa kissing passionately. She ran her hands under his shirt to feel his abs as she trailed kisses down his neck, then moved her hands around to his back and ran them down the strong muscles she found there as well. Nick slid his hand up the outside of her thigh and under the edge of her skirt. Olivia felt her hand push his back down her leg as she kissed him again. She moaned quietly as he playfully bit her earlobe and growled in her hear. Olivia unbuttoned his white shirt and slid it off into the floor. Nick rand his bingers through the dark hair around her face, then took the clip out of her hair and dropped it to the floor. He kissed her so passionately as he ran his fingers through the wavy locks of her hair. Olivia ran her hands up his chest and pushed him upward to look into his eyes.**

"**I really want this," she whispered playfully.**

"**So do I," he replied and she knew this was it.**

"**Nick," she almost moaned as he nibbled on her ear again.**

"**Yeah," he said staring into her eyes. Olivia raised up to kiss him, then turned her head as if motioning toward the bedroom.**

"**I don't want to do this here," she panted. **

**Nick sat upright on the sofa to catch his breath. Olivia still laid there looking up at him, then she sat up as well. He stared at her as her hair fell down around her face.**

"**You are so beautiful," he whispered as he held he hands in his and brought them both to their feet. "I am the luckiest guy in the world," he whispered as he leaned in to kiss her tenderly on the lips.**

**Olivia took him by the hand and lead him down the hallway to the bedroom. **


	12. 12 Touch Me

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Twelve: Touch Me)_

Once inside the bedroom Olivia crawled seductively across the bed and patted her hand on the pillow beside her. She stared him down with her big brown eyes and smiled. Nick walked over to the edge of the bed and crawled in over the top of her kissing her again. By this point Olivia didn't even car if they actually had sex as long as he didn't stop kissing her. He raised them both up and unzipped the back of her dress then lowered her back to the bed. Once again he ran his hand up the outside of her thigh and under her skirt pushing it upward. Olivia reached down and unbuttoned his pants. Nick ran his hands up both of her legs and slid her down against him. Olivia just gazed lovingly into his eyes.

After a few moments of just admiring each other, Nick leaned down and pressed his lips to hers again. He caressed the side of her face with his thumb and ran his fingers through her hair. He moved down and began kissing her collarbone as she moaned softly and her breathing got heavier. Olivia felt his hands move across her stomach and move down her body sliding off her black lace panties. Then he raised her up, moved his hands back up her body and lifted the short black dress over her head. He stared at her for a few seconds. This was uncomfortable for Olivia, so she leaned in and kissed him again. Before she knew it they were rolling around in her bed together and his clothes were in a pile in the floor next to her dress.

"Wait," she panted. She placed her hand against Nicks chest and raised him up as she turned and reached into the night stand drawer. "Here," she whispered handing him a condom. Nick started to hesitate, but she stared into his eyes and ran her hands over his chest. Olivia laid back down on the pillow and closed her eyes. She couldn't believe this was finally about to happen.

"Okay," Nick said moving on top of her again.

Olivia looked deep into his eyes and kissed him once more as he raised up and entered her body. She moaned slightly, that was a little rougher than she had imagined it would be. But he was so into her every need. It had been so long since she had even made love, she wondered if he could tell. He kissed her and caressed her body with his hands while moving slowly inside of her. She couldn't help but moan quietly as he kissed her shoulder and ran his fingers down her spine. He then took one of her hands in each of his and raised them above her head. She wanted to hesitate, part of her didn't like losing control to him, but she couldn't put together the words to ask him to stop. She squeezed her eyes shut tightly and focused solely on the thought of him moving inside of her. Her breathing was heavy now and so was his. She opened her eyes again to look into his, but his were closed as well.

"Nick," she whispered as she broke her hand free of his and touched the side of his face.

He moaned and tipped his head back, then took a deep breath and looked down at her underneath him. "Yeah," he answered.

"Touch me," she said as she raised up to kiss him and wrapped her arms around his waist. Olivia closed her eyes again, it seemed like somehow she could feel him better with her eyes closed. She wanted to remember this feeling. The look in his eyes and every moment before, while and after he made love to her.

Nick ran his hands down her legs and pulled them higher on each side of him. Then pushed harder and deeper into her. She gasped for a moment. This was not exactly comfortable for her, but he seemed to be enjoying it, so she didn't say anything. She closed her eyes again and ran her hands down his back as she felt his thrusts get faster. She was moaning and enjoying him, but was not ready for it to be over.

Olivia closed her eyes tighter and reached her hands above her head to grasp the headboard. Nick tipped her head back and kissed her neck. That's it, she thought to herself as she opened her eyes to look into his. Their eyes met only for a second before he laid over her body and turned his head toward the wall. Olivia could not help but moan with his movements. He felt good, so good. Although it was nothing like she imagined it would be.

She wanted so badly for him to just look into her eyes. She wanted to see in them the pleasure she made him feel, but it almost seemed as if he was avoiding looking at her altogether. Olivia closed her eyes and imagined his staring into hers. She wanted him to look so deep into her soul and tell her that he felt the way that she did. She felt a little disappointed that he didn't seem to be paying as much attention to her as he did her body. Although the sex was very fulfilling physically, she couldn't help but feel a little let down emotionally.

"Nick," she whispered as his movements seemed to slow.

"Yeah," he replied almost out of breath.

"Look at me," she said softly as she pushed her hands downward against his chest.

"I am looking at you," he said staring down at her body underneath his.

"No," she said quietly, "look at me." She put her hand against his face and turned his head until he looked into her eyes. She could feel the tears welling up inside them as she stared at him. Nick leaned in and kissed her tenderly. He placed his hand beside her head on the bed and raised himself above her thrusting upward to finish. Olivia moaned, half in orgasm and half wanting to cry. She had been let down, but didn't want to show him and was too busy responding to the reaction of her body to his to be able to focus on what to say to him.

Nick fell in exhaustion across her body. Then laughed a little as he looked up at her and wiped a small bit of sweat from her forehead. He thrust a few more times inside her causing her to moan an almost whimper like sound then he she felt him exit her body.

Nick kissed her lips and then kissed the side of her neck. He rolled over and laid in the bed beside her. Olivia laid there in the quiet waiting for him to say something, anything to her, but the room was quiet. She took a deep breath and pulled the sheet up around her then turned on her side to settle in against him for the night. Nick almost seemed to resist her for a moment before he finally placed his arm around her. The way he held her now felt awkward and unnatural, not at all like the way he had held her when they danced earlier that night.

Olivia took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. Maybe she was over reacting, this was after all their first time making love. Maybe he was just nervous, maybe things would come more naturally for them the next time. She raised her hand and ran her fingertips in small circles on his chest. He raised his hand and placed it over hers.

"Nick," she whispered as she turned in to him and raised up to look at him.

"What baby?" He answered, but didn't look at her.

Olivia waited for a few seconds for him to look at her, but he never did. She lowered herself back down in the bed and kissed his chest as she felt a tear roll off her cheek. "I love you," she whispered softly and she laid back down beside him and nestled as close as she could to him.

"I love you, too." He replied. Somehow his words didn't sound anything like she had imagined they would. He didn't even look at her when he said it. He didn't hold her tight or kiss her lips. The phrase she had wanted so badly to hear him say had become just words as they fell from his lips in the dark. Olivia wanted so badly to cry. But not now, not here. Instead she closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep with his arm around her.


	13. 13 Stay With Me

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Thirteen: Stay With Me)_

The clock read 3:54 am when Olivia awoke to find herself alone in the bed. She took a deep breath and ran her arm over the side of the bed where Nick had been sleeping just hours before. She laid on her stomach in the dark and watched his shadow move across the room as he put his pants back on in the dark. Nick turned to look at her but could not tell she was awake. He started toward the bedroom door.

"You weren't going to say goodbye," she said softly as she raised up to look at him.

He just stood there quiet in the dark for a minute unsure of what to say. "I thought you were asleep."

"I was," she replied. She just sat there wrapped in a sheet waiting for some explanation from him.

"I didn't want to wake you," he said as he walked over to the bed and leaned in to kiss her.

"Stay with me," she whispered as she stared him down and forced him to look into her eyes. Part of her couldn't believe this was happening.

"I can't Olivia, not tonight." He said almost sharply as he pushed her hand from his chest.

"Nick it is almost four in the morning, what is the difference if you stay a couple more hours?" She almost felt abandon by him. This was not the man she had fell in love with over the last few months. She refused to be used and treated this way.

"Look Olivia, I have an early shift at the hospital and I still have to get home and get cleaned up. I have to shower and wash the sweat off me and I just have to go." He could see the disappointment on her face through the glow of moonlight through the blinds on the bedroom window. "I will see you tonight, okay?" He leaned in and kissed her tenderly. "And I will think about you the entire time I am away," he said with a smile. Olivia laid back down in her bed alone and sighed as she heard the apartment door shut. If she wanted him, she was going to have to deal with his crazy work schedule and long work hours. She certainly understood having a job that demanded a lot of you. She grabbed the pillow he had been sleeping on and pulled it up to her face breathing in deeply. It smelled like him, like his cologne. She placed it under her head and nestled her face in against it closing her eyes. She yawned quietly and drifted off to sleep.


	14. 14 Trouble With The Truth

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Fourteen: Trouble With The Truth)_

Olivia overslept the next morning and woke up with a slight hangover from all of the champagne and wine the night before. She showered and dressed quickly and was off to work. Part of her couldn't wait to see Elliot, he could help her sort this mess out. But part of her was embarrassed and almost ashamed of the way she had allowed him to treat her. She wanted to call Nick and ask him what had happened the night before. She wanted to confront him and ask him exactly what he wanted from her. Was he even in this relationship for the same reasons? Too much to think about before I have my coffee she thought to herself as she got into the elevator at work.

Olivia walked into the room and laid her things down on her desk. She took a deep breath and sat down in her chair trying to gather her thoughts before Elliot cornered her. Too late she thought as she saw his hand appear in front of her holding her steaming coffee mug.

"I made you breakfast," he said with a smile.

"You are an angel," she replied taking the cup from his hand and taking a big sip.

"You are still wearing your sunglasses Liv, late night?"

She laid her head down on her desk for a minute, it was pounding. "Not really. I'm hung-over," she mumbled.

Elliot knelt down beside her desk to look at her. He slid the sunglasses off her face, folded them up and put them on the top of her purse. "How did it go?" He whispered to her.

Olivia raised her head to look at him and he could see the tears welling up in her eyes. Elliot brushed a stray strand of hair from her eyes and put his forehead against hers.

"Let me get the car keys. We have a lot of work to do," he said looking into her eyes. She knew what he meant. The could not talk about it here and he knew she needed to get it off her chest. If he got the car and they went out to run down leads they would have some time alone to talk in the car.

Olivia opened her locker and set her purse inside. She unzipped it and took out a couple of aspirin from the bottle she kept there and swallowed them with coffee.

"You ready?" Elliot asked as he walked up behind her.

"Yup," she said closing the door of her locker and clipping her badge to her belt.

They made it half way across town without talking about anything but the case before Elliot pulled the car in a secluded area near riverside park. Wait right here he said as he climbed out of the car and disappeared behind some trees. Within a few minutes he had returned to the car with a paper plate in his hand.

"What is this," she asked.

"Funnel cake," he replied. "I found this vendor a few weeks ago while I was here with the kids. Taste it, I promise it will make you feel better!"

Olivia slid down in her car seat as the shared the greasy sweet food. He was right, she did feel better. But she knew it wasn't the cake. Just the fact that he took the time to try to please her made her feel better. Elliot was always good for that. She sighed and turned her head to gaze out the window.

"I think I screwed up," she said as she leaned her forehead against the glass.

"What happened?" He asked. They sat quietly for a few moments then he could see the tears running down her cheek.

"Everything," she said.

"It wasn't what you wanted it to be?" He was trying to coax conversation out of her without making her feel attacked.

"Things were wonderful at first," she said. "Then we went back to my apartment and I invited him in. We made love and…." she stopped and just stared quietly out the window.

"And…?" he asked.

"I told him I loved him. He said it too, but it was like he didn't mean it. Then early this morning I woke up and he was leaving. He was just going to leave and not say anything to me at all. Just get up and walk out. Elliot, I feel so stupid." She turned and looked at him. It broke his heart to see her cry.

"You can't feel bad for being honest with him, Liv. I'm sure he will come around. Maybe you caught him off guard. He wasn't expecting it," he put his hand on her shoulder in support. "I think you did the right thing."

"There's more," she sobbed. "When we were in bed together, he wouldn't look at me. Like into my eyes. I just wanted so bad for this to be perfect and it wasn't at all like I thought it would be." Olivia looked devastated.

"Liv, we have all had bad sexual experiences. I'm sure it will be better the next time. You said his wife died a long time ago, maybe it has been a long time for him. He just needs to get back into practice."

"I didn't say it was bad," she whispered as she turned her head to look at him.

Elliot smiled at her, "Ahhh."

Olivia laughed at his reaction. "Physically, it was good. But it was like there was no emotion. I guess I needed that. I really would have thought he would have been slower, you know? Sweeter and more in touch with me."

"You invited him in to make love, but all you got was sex?" Elliot looked at her and she looked up at him from sad eyes.

"Exactly. And when it was over, he just got up and walked away." she whispered.

"I'm sorry things didn't work out the way you wanted them to. I was really hoping he was the one. That he would come in and sweep you off your feet." Elliot was not exactly sure what to say to comfort her now. She took a deep breath, dried her eyes and focused her attention out the window again.

"Elliot, maybe love doesn't work the way we want it to. Maybe we have to just accept it when we realize it and take it for what it is. Maybe there is no real happy ending, no fairy tale romance." She turned her big brown eyes to look at him. "I still love him," she said looking at him for approval.

"What are you going to do?" He asked.

"What can I do? Any way I move, I'm going to get burned. I'm in love with a man that doesn't love me."

"Liv, maybe he does love you and he just isn't ready to say it. I have seen you guys together and you have great chemistry."

"I thought so too," she sighed. "I'm not ready to give him up," she said staring at Elliot.

"Then don't," Elliot replied. "If things were better before, slow things down. Get this relationship back to where you guys are comfortable. Take it from there."

"Thanks El," she said forcing a grin.

"You should talk to him and explain to him how you feel. Find out what is going on with him. Don't let him jerk you around, Liv. Sometimes the right thing hurts."

Olivia looked into Elliot's eyes and squeezed his hand, "that's what I'm afraid of."


	15. 15 Wounded

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Fifteen: Wounded)_

The next two months flew by quickly. Olivia was determined to make her delicate relationship work. She had tried to explain to Nick how she felt and it seemed like he had come around for the most part. At times there was still a strange distance between them and Olivia was working hard to find a way to resolve it. Things between them intimately had seemed to kind of work them selves out and he seemed to adore her. Olivia was finally feeling from Nick the love that she was trying so desperately to give him.

Tonight was a big night for them, it was their four month anniversary and a big social event for the hospital Nick worked in. It was a $200 a plate dinner to raise money for the new wing of the hospital. But more importantly than that, it was Nick's big chance to make a good impression on the hospital director and possibly get promoted to overlook the new wing.

Olivia put a lot of though into choosing the perfect dress. She felt like she was going to prom. She needed an elegant ball gown that made her look stunning. She was going to be on the arm of the most handsome doctor in the hospital and wanted him to be proud to be there with her.

"I think this is it!" She said to herself with excitement as she looked into the mirror in the dressing room. The gown was white satin and fit the curves of her body well. It wasn't too tight or too low cut, it was perfect. She stepped up on the small stool in the dressing room and turned around to look at the back of the gown. The rhinestone studded straps crossed her back and left a rhinestone chain to hang down in the center of her back. The dress was amazingly beautiful and fit like it had been made just for her. Olivia topped off her purchase with matching heels and a pair of earrings, then headed home to change. She decided to leave her hair down and wavy because that was how Nick liked it.

"That's it," she said sliding a rhinestone butterfly pin into her hair for the perfect touch. Olivia heard the door bell ring. She walked into the living room and opened the door. Someone else must have buzzed Nick into the building because there he stood with a dozen of the most beautiful red roses she had ever seen.

"Hey beautiful," he said as he stepped inside and hugged her.

She tipped her head back and kissed his lips, she felt like a princess on the arm of her prince. "I'm almost ready," she said as she walked back toward the bedroom to grab her shoes.

"Is that what you are wearing?" He asked and she turned to look at him.

"You don't like it?" Olivia could feel her heart skip a beat, she wanted so badly to make everything tonight perfect for him.

"I like it, but don't you think it is a little inappropriate? I can see your entire back, Olivia. And you might as well just take you top off and show the world your chest for what that leaves to the imagination!" Olivia stared at him in shock, she thought he would like the dress. She turned to glance in the mirror behind the couch, she didn't understand the problem.

"Honey, it really isn't that bad," she said as she smiled and turned to look at him. But his reaction was something she would have never expected, something she would never forget as long as she lived. Nick drew back his hand and slapped her across the cheek bone. Olivia stumbled backward and caught her balance against the wall. She stood there trembling, crying, not sure of what to do or say. She was terrified of him.

"Do not talk back to me! We don't have all night, go, change and hurry up!" Nick stepped back and she walked quickly toward her bedroom and locked the door. Olivia searched the dresser for her cell phone, but she had already put in in the purse she had taken in the living room. She was shaking so hard and trying to hold herself together. She placed her hands on the dresser and looked at herself in the mirror. Gasping for breath and trying not to break down she took several deep breaths. If she didn't go now it would only make things worse. He had already paid for the tickets. She looked at her self in the mirror and the tears streaming down her cheeks. She had to do this. She had to pull herself together and make this work, at least for tonight. She took one more deep breath then blotted her face with a tissue.

Olivia turned and quickly shuffled some dresses around in her closet until she found the simplest dressy-dress she owned. The dress was black and white and cut like a tank top at the top with a collar that fell just short of her neck. The skirt was ball gown length and fuller than the one she had before. She dressed as quickly as she could and touched up her make up, but couldn't hide the reddish blush of her right cheek where he had hit her.

Olivia stared into her own eyes in the mirror. "You can do this," she said, "now pull yourself together." She took a deep breath and walked back into the living room.

"Much better," Nick said as he approached her. He leaned in to kiss her and Olivia could not help but flinch, she felt her body tense up uncontrollably as he leaned in to her and kissed her cheek where he had slapped her. "I'm sorry," he mumbled, but it didn't sound like a true apology. "I shouldn't have hit you. But you know how important this night is, everything has to be perfect. That is why I am taking you," he said raising her hand to kiss it. But it was too late for flattery now. Olivia had already seen the demon that lived inside him.

The night was long, but seemed to be going well. Olivia kept watching the clock, all she wanted was to return to the safety of her own home. But Nick was mingling with everyone, holding her hand and dragging her around with him. She just kept smiling and really all she wanted to do was cry. How could she have been so wrong about him? She finally got a moment alone with him on the dance floor during a slow song.

"Nick," she said quietly afraid of upsetting him.

"What?" He asked looking into her eyes.

She smiled at him for the first time all night. In his eyes she saw the man she was in love with, not this monster he had become. "It's pretty late, I have to work early tomorrow."

"I'll let you know when it is time to go," he replied pulling her in closer to him.

Olivia was trapped and had no idea what to do. She leaned her head in against his shoulder and closed her eyes, fighting back tears. He moved his arms in tighter around her and leaned in to kiss her on the lips. "I love you," he said staring into her eyes. It was at that moment when he first broke her heart.

It was well after 2:00 am when they returned to Olivia's apartment and she had to get up to be at work at seven. Nick followed her into the apartment and closed the door behind them.

"That went well, I thought." He said watching her take off her earrings.

"Good," she said with a soft smile. She was so confused and needed time to think things through.

Nick moved in behind her as she looked in the mirror to remove her necklace. He raised her hair with one hand and kissed the back of her neck seductively. With the other arm he reached around in front of her and held her hand in his. "You are so beautiful," he whispered softly in her ear. He turned her around and backed her up against the wall to kiss her passionately. Olivia could feel her heart pounding deep in her chest, but she wasn't sure exactly why. Partially with desire for him and partially in fear, she just wanted this night to be over. She leaned her head into his chest and he picked her up and carried her into the bedroom to make love to her.


	16. 16 Lessons In Love

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Sixteen: Lessons In Love)_

The next morning was the first time Olivia had ever woke up in Nick's arms. It was still early and she had to get up and get ready for work. As she sat up and wrapped the sheet around her she felt his finger tips touch the center of her back.

"Where are you going so early?" he asked in a sleepy voice.

"I have to work," she said turning to kiss him.

"I love you," he said running his fingers through her wavy hair.

"I know you do," she said as she nestled the side of her face into his hand and kissing it. "I have to go," she whispered.

Olivia grabbed her clothes and headed for the bathroom down the hall to survey the damage. She pulled her hair into a pony tail and turned on the bathroom light. The red mark he had left on her cheek was still there staring back at her. "Elliot is going to freak," she said to her self almost in tears.

She moved quickly back into her master bathroom off the bedroom to grab some make up to try to hide the mark. After about twenty minutes she thought she finally had it covered. She grabbed her keys and headed off to work.

When she arrived she sat down at her desk and started on paperwork. Elliot was not that great at the clerical part of their job so there was always a pile of it that needed to be finished. This bought her a little time, Elliot would not confront her at work. He needed to get her alone to have that kind of talk with her. She glanced up at him across the desk and they made eye contact for the first time all day. Elliot glared at her in disappointment for not having already brought the subject up. She knew he knew something had happened and she couldn't lie to him, she never lied to him. She had to think of something, Elliot was furious and would not stand for this. After about three hours of silent looks across the desk Elliot stood up and stormed out of the room slamming the door behind him.

"Elliot wait," she cried as she ran out after him. She caught up to him pacing on the front steps of the police station.

"How long has he been hitting you?" He shouted.

"Elliot calm down!" She said grabbing his arms to try to make him stand still.

"I wont clam down Olivia! You show up to work with a hand print on your face and you tell me to clam down?!? What the hell is wrong with you?" Elliot was pacing so fast she thought he would explode.

"Elliot please don't be angry at me," she said with her eyes tearing up. "I need you on my side here."

"Liv, I am always on your side. And if you wont protect yourself, then it's up to me!" Elliot turned and walked quickly down the steps toward the parking garage.

"Elliot, what are you going to do?" She cried, honestly afraid that he would hurt Nick.

"I'm going to set him straight! He wants someone to hit, here I am!"

"Elliot Stop!" She screamed pushing against him to slow him down. "You can't do this, please don't do this. Not now!"

"Why?" He shouted at her before he realized it was her he was yelling at. She looked back at him trembling and for the first time he saw real fear in her eyes. Olivia just stood there torn, not sure what to say, so she didn't say anything. Elliot turned and continued walking toward his car.

"Because, I'm pregnant!" She called out to him as she burst into tears and sat down on the steps sobbing.

Elliot stopped in his tracks and turned to look at her. He could not believe the words that had just come from her mouth. And for the first time he realized why she had been fighting so hard to keep Nick in her life. Elliot walked over and sat down on the steps beside her. She looked at him and he had tears in his eyes, too.

"I have never been so scared, Elliot. I don't know what to do," she whispered through tears.

Elliot put his arm around her and kissed her forehead. He just held her against his chest for a few moments unsure of what to say or do. He had to find a way to protect her.


	17. 17 Finding Comfort

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Seventeen: Finding Comfort)_

Olivia awoke in the early hours of morning to a loud clap of thunder. She opened her heavy eyes and surveyed the room, then rolled over on her back and looked up at the ceiling. Staring into the shadows she tried to let the sound of the rain sing her back to sleep, but it was no use. She hadn't been sleeping well lately, she had too much on her mind. She seemed to be exhausted all of the time and figured it was just the pregnancy. She sat up in bed and stretched before placing her feet onto the thick plush of the carpet. She sat on the edge of the bed in the dark for a few minutes listening to the sound of the rain tapping on the window pane. She stood up and walked over to the bedroom window and drew up the blinds then placed her hand against the glass. Everything in the room was now covered with a cool blue glow from the light outside and she watched as the rain streamed down the outside of the glass. She loved the storms, somehow they had always been a comfort to her. She took a deep breath in relaxation then and walked down the hallway and into the kitchen.

The clock on the microwave read 1:23 am. Olivia tilted her head to focus her eyes on the glowing numbers, she thought it would have been later than that. She felt the cold of the tile on the kitchen floor beneath her feet as she stood in front of the refrigerator with the door open peering inside. She had only known for a few days now that she was going to be a mother, but had already replaced all of the wine and caffeinated drinks with juice and bottled water. She took another deep breath and grabbed a bottle of spring water from the crisper drawer, then closed the door. She pulled a glass from the cabinet and poured half a bottle of the cold liquid into it.

Olivia walked into the living room through the darkness to peer out the window. She could still hear the thunder booming off in the distance but it seemed like the storm was dying down. She turned around and walked back toward the hallway, hearing a noise behind her as she did. She turned on the hall light and the glow dimly lit the kitchen and living room areas as well. In the living room, on the couch she found Elliot sound asleep. She smiled with a soft laugh, he had tried to talk her into staying at his apartment tonight until she could think things through. He had told her it would give her a break from Nick, but Liv knew that he was really worried Nick would come by there and end up hurting her again. Elliot had dropped her off around eight o'clock and she took a long bath and went to bed around nine-thirty. He must have come back sometime after that to check on her. She loved this about him. He was such an amazing man, she thought. He was truthful and real and nothing like Nick had turned out to be.

Liv opened the hall closet door and took a blanket from the top shelf. She walked quietly over to Elliot and placed the blanket over him, kneeling down beside him to watch him sleep. She watched his chest as it rose and fell with each deep breath he took. She was so lucky to have him in her life, she thought to herself. She didn't know where she would be with out him and she certainly couldn't go through any of this with out him. She leaned in and kisses his forehead, the way he did to her so many times. She wasn't sure what exactly this bond was between them, but it was stronger than anything she had ever felt. She placed full trust in it and knew that at this moment in her life he was the only stability she really had. She stood up and walked back toward the hallway.

"What are you doing up?" She heard him ask quietly as she turned off the hall light.

"I couldn't sleep, I have been having a little trouble sleeping lately." She replied.

Elliot raised up on the couch and lifted the blanked, then motioned for her to come over to him. Olivia leaned against the living room wall and just looked at him for a moment then walked over to him and laid down beside him on the couch. He rolled over and pulled her into him then pulled the blanked up around them.

"You have had a lot on your mind," he said softly as he brushed her hair back from her eyes.

She nestled in closer to him placing the side of her face against shirt. Normally she would have thought this inappropriate, but she knew it was innocent and she found it comforting. She laid there on the sofa with him, her head against his chest watching the rise and fall of each breath. He held her in his arms and it felt so good to be held. Before she knew it her breaths matched the pace of his. She felt her eyes getting heavy and finally she drifted off to sleep.


	18. 18 The Hardest Thing

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Eighteen: The Hardest Thing)_

Olivia sat on her couch quietly, patiently trying to gain confidence as she waited for Nick to arrive. She had hidden the truth from him long enough and it was time she told him about the baby. She had no idea how he would handle it, but was hoping it would go well. In the back of her mind she had already decided to leave him and raise her child alone. Now she just had to break the news to him.

She picked up a crime/drama book she had started reading several months earlier and tried to use it to occupy her mind, but all she could think about was how he was going to react. What would he say? What would he do? She heard the buzzer downstairs and walked down to greet him and let him into the building.

"Hey," she said as she opened the door and he stepped inside. Elliot had come by earlier so they could work out a plan together and figure out what she was going to say to Nick.

"There's my girl," he said as he leaned in to kiss her. But Olivia turned her head and he kissed her cheek instead. She had to focus and could not let him distract her from what she was about to do. He held her hand as they walked back up the stairs and into her apartment.

"Would you like something to drink?" She asked as he seated himself on the sofa.

"Beer or wine would be great," he replied.

She chuckled a little as she glanced into the refrigerator, "I'm afraid all I have is juice and water," she replied.

"Water is fine," he said watching her closely, sensing something was going on with her.

"So, what's up?" He asked her as she handed him a glass and poured water from the bottle into it. "On the phone you said you wanted to talk to me."

"I said I needed to talk to you," she replied, hoping he would catch the difference.

She sat down too, but instead of placing herself on the sofa beside him she chose the chair across the room.

"Olivia, what is going on? I get the feeling you are avoiding me."

"I have just had a lot of things on my mind," she replied unable to look at him. "Nick, I'm pregnant." She said softly.

He just stared at her for a moment and she felt like a huge weight had been lifted from her chest.

"Pregnant?" He asked. "Are you sure?"

"Yes," she replied. "I took the test three times."

"And you are sure it is mine?"

She just looked at him unable to move and unsure of what to say. She could not believe ha had just asked her that.

"Who else's would it be Nick? You are the only one I have been with!" She was trying hard to keep herself from crying, but refused to give him the satisfaction. Part of her had expected this type of reaction from him.

"No one else?" He asked as if trying to prove a point.

"Only you," she said fighting back tears.

"Not even Elliot?" He asked glaring at her.

She sighed in an almost laugh, but had kind of expected this too. "Elliot and I are not like that!" She exclaimed. "We never have been!" She shook her head in disbelief, he was grasping at straws here to trying to keep from having to claim any responsibility.

"I thought you were on the pill!" He shouted at her.

"I was," she replied. "I didn't expect this either!"

So far so good. He was still on the couch and her still in her chair.

"I can't do this!" He shouted. "Not now. I'm at the height of my career. I can't have a baby."

"I don't expect you to," she replied looking down at the floor.

"What will it cost to get rid of it?" He asked her.

This was the comment that caused her to break. "I don't want to get rid of it," she replied feeling a single tear fall from her cheek. She had to keep control of this.

"Olivia, I didn't ask what you wanted! Think about this! We can't do this!"

"I don't expect anything from you," she said calmly. "Nothing more will ever be said about it. I just want to raise my baby, I'll do it alone. I just thought you deserved to know the truth, Nick. That somewhere in the world, you would have a child."

"Right and I am stuck paying out child support for the next eighteen years because you can't remember to take a pill!"

"I don't want child support. I don't want anything, Nick, just this baby."

Things were quiet for a minute as he stared at her.

"I can't deal with this right now, Olivia." He replied then he got up and walked out the door slamming it behind him.

She stood up and locked the apartment door then leaned against it. He had actually taken that much better than she thought he would. She sighed heavily then walked over and picked up the phone dialing Elliot's number.

"Hey," he said as he answered half way through the first ring, she knew he was waiting nervously for her to call. "How'd it go?"

"It actually went okay, I guess." She replied. "He wants me to have an abortion."

"Olivia, you do not even believe in abortion!" She could hear the concern in Elliot's voice.

"El, I didn't say I was going to do it. I can't kill my baby. I wont. I never even considered it! You know me better than that," she said.

"I know. But he seems to have this power over you and I figured he would try to talk or threaten you in to it," he said.

"Surprisingly he didn't threaten me at all," she replied. "Maybe it was honestly a one time thing, maybe he didn't really mean to hurt me Elliot. I mean, I know this relationship is not right for me. I am not staying with him, but I know what it is like to grow up with out a father. Maybe I shouldn't keep him from the baby's life, because of one mistake he made with me in a stressful moment." Olivia almost couldn't believe the words she heard coming out of her mouth. This didn't sound like her at all. But she was tired of fighting and just wanted to find some kind of solution to the situation.

"Liv, if he would snap and hit you, what makes you think he wouldn't hurt a baby. I have had five kids. Babies cry all of the time. They need fed, changed, burped and sometimes they just cry for no reason at all. Babies are very stressful. He hit you, don't take that chance with your child."

Elliot was right, as usual. She knew she had to make a clean break from Nick and cut off all ties between him and her child.

"You are right Elliot," she said quietly and hung up the phone.

Two hours later the buzzer rang for her apartment again. She figured it was Elliot coming over to comfort her and slipped her shoes on and walked down the stairs to let him in. Olivia opened the door and stood face to face with Nick.

"I just want to talk," he said calmly. "We need to work this out," Olivia nodded in agreement and let him in. They went back up to her apartment and talked casually for a couple of hours about random things while she made the two of them dinner and he set the table.

Afterward he told her to take it easy while he cleared the dishes. He was being awful nice, what was he up to? She wondered. Nick came over next to her and sat down beside her.

"Olivia," he said taking her hands in his and looking into her eyes.

"Yes," she replied giving him a blank stare.

"I have been thinking a lot about this over the last few hours. Honey, I know that you want this. I just don't think it is right for either of us."

"I agree, Nick. It just isn't working out," she said letting go of his hand. "I think we need space from each other," she continued. "We shouldn't see each other anymore."

Nick stared into her eyes. "I was talking about this crazy idea of yours to have a baby. Look," he said pulling a ball of hundred dollar bills out of his pocket and placing them on the coffee table. Olivia took a deep breath and stood up from the sofa. "There is a clinic across town. I made an appointment for tomorrow afternoon. I will take you if you want. This is the best thing."

She felt like someone was suffocating her. She could not believe that the man who helped her create this child was now insisting that she kill it. She turned around refusing to face him.

"I can't do it," she replied as tears poured from her eyes.

"I already made the appointment," he said standing up and grabbing her by the arm. She turned around and could feel the fear taking over her body when she saw the anger in his eyes. She jerked herself free of him and walked across the room.

"I won't. This will in no way effect you," she turned around to look at him again. "Just walk away, Nick. Walk away and it is all over."

"It isn't over," he said putting his hand on her arm and backing her against the wall. He leaned in to kiss her then she felt his hand against her throat. She stared into his eyes and he glared into hers. "You will do this if I have to pick you up and take you there myself," he whispered into her ear as he moved his thumb up against her jawbone and pressed slightly, not really hurting her, but making it difficult for her to breathe. He was threatening her.

Olivia gasped a shallow breath and continued staring into his eyes. "Stop it," she said as she placed her hand on his attempting to push him off of her. It was much bigger than her and had her pinned against the wall. He tightened the grip he now had on her throat with his hand. And watched for a second as she gasped and struggled to free herself. In the struggle she scratched his arm and he slapped her across the face once more, this time busting her lip.

Olivia could taste the blood from her lip and feel the warmth of her tears as she looked at him.

"Nick please, you're scaring me," she whispered as she felt him loosen his grip on her throat. By now she was crying heavily and trying to catch her breath.

"Don't make me hurt you, Olivia." He threatened staring into her eyes as he pressed his thumb to the split in her bottom lip now pouring blood down his wrist and arm as he held her.

She closed her eyes tightly as she heard the click of her gun being cocked.

"Let her go," Elliot said from behind him.

Nick released Olivia and she slid down the wall and into the floor sobbing and trying to catch her breath. She curled her knees up to her chest and watched through tears as Elliot escorted Nick out the door. Olivia placed her hands over her face and cried, trying to calm herself but there was no holding it back. She broke down right there.

Elliot came back into the apartment and dropped to the floor pulling her up to look at her. She practically jumped into his open arms and buried her face in his chest as she sobbed. Elliot picked her up in his arms and carried her to the sofa where he sat her down to inspect her wounds. He placed his thumb gently over the split in her lip to apply pressure to the gash. And looked into her eyes. She was calming down now.

"Where else did he hurt you?" He asked in a calm voice.

She raised her hand and placed it over his, "nowhere, he didn't really get the chance to."

"Elliot picked up the blanket draped over the back of the couch and placed it around her shoulders, then pulled her head in against his chest.

"You are going to have to get a restraining order," he said calmly to her.

"I know," she whispered. "Elliot, I think he would have…. If you hadn't been here…."

"I know," he said holding her tight in his arms and looking into her eyes. He kissed the top of her forehead and closed his eyes tight. Right then, he thanked God for bringing him back to her apartment just in time.


	19. 19 Choices

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Nineteen: Choices)_

Olivia sat on the edge of the sofa holding an ice pack to her busted lip. She looked up and watched as Elliot walked circles outside on her balcony talking on his cell phone. He had been making calls for the past hour trying to work out the details of a restraining order while keeping the situation as controlled as possible. Everyone knew that Olivia had been dating Nick, but until now no one had know about her pregnancy. Elliot was determined to keep it that way until Olivia felt comfortable telling people.

Elliot returned inside and sat beside her. He placed his hand on her back.

"How do you feel?" He asked looking into her now calm eyes.

"Better," she replied. All it took to make things better was him being there beside her. Olivia had no idea what Nick really was or was not capable of, but she really honestly thought that if Elliot had not entered the apartment when he did something horrible would have happened to her and her baby. He had saved her life and the life of the baby inside her, there was no doubt in her mind. And for that she was eternally grateful to him. But what shocked her the most about Elliot was how calm he was as he handled the situation. She would have thought he would have attacked Nick and she would have had to break up a fight between them. She was glad the hadn't happened. Elliot had a temper, especially when it came to standing up for her. If he ever got to the point of hitting Nick, Olivia was afraid the rage would take control and Elliot would kill him. She didn't want Nick in her life anymore, but she didn't want Elliot in prison for killing him either.

Elliot sighed and crossed his fingers behind his head as he leaned back on the sofa. "Why don't you get some things packed and come stay with me until we can get this restraining order in place?" He turned and looked at her, she was exhausted and needed to relax. All of this stress was not good for her, especially now.

"What's going on with it?" She asked removing the ice pack from her lip and looking at the blood on the cloth covering it.

"They are hesitating to grant the order……" Olivia turned and looked at him and he saw the fear begin to seep back into her eyes.

"Elliot, he almost killed me!" She said.

"I know. I talked to Casey, I had to explain the entire situation. She wont tell anyone, but I needed her to understand the importance of this situation. She is going to make some more calls and see what she can do. Liv, they are hesitating because you have not filed any formal charges on him." Elliot did not want her to feel like he was pressuring her. This was a decision she would have to make for herself and as much as he knew that pressing charges was probably best in the situation, things were completely different from where Olivia was sitting. This was a man she had loved, probably still loved and was the father of her unborn child. This had to be her decision.

Olivia looked down at the floor and ran her hands over her face before looking up at him again. "I have no idea what to do Elliot. He could lose his license over a battery charge. I don't want to hurt him, I just want him to leave me alone."

"But the D.A. could also decide to charge him with assaulting an off duty officer," Elliot said.

Olivia raised her head, she hadn't thought of that.

"Elliot," she said shaking her head.

"Liv, he knew you were a cop from the start. He knew you were a cop when he hit you. He knew you were pregnant and he hit you. He didn't care. He is in a lot of trouble here." Elliot looked at her and knew she had a lot to think about. "The D.A. said they would give you 48 hours to file formal charges. Casey is going to see if she can get you a say in how he is charged. Look, I think you have been through enough tonight. Pack some clothes and come home with me. Nick doesn't know where I live, you will be safe there. And it will give you some time to think." Elliot reached out and took her hand in his, he wished with all of his heart he could take away the pain she was feeling right now. Or at least knew a better way to comfort her. But for now, he wasn't letting her out of his sight. At least until Nick, the ticking time bomb had been defused.


	20. 20 Calm After The Storm

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Twenty: Calm After The Storm )_

After reaching Elliot's apartment Olivia took a shower and he fixed her a cup of hot tea to help her unwind. She now sat on his sofa wearing a tank top and a pair of shorts and had her knees drawn up to her chest with a blanket across her legs. She was holding the coffee mug he had given her on one hand and flipping channels on the television with the other. This was something that normally drove him crazy about anyone, but somehow with her he found it almost charming. She rarely watched television. Olivia was more into reading. Romance novels and crime stories were her passion. So now it was almost like she was trying to gather as much information as she could from the five second clip she watched of each channel.

He wasn't exactly sure what it was about her in this moment that caused him to fix his attention on her, but he was locked. Her dark hair was getting longer and had several loose waves in it. She had it pulled up in a pony tail, like she did many days at work. She looked just like she did every other time he had ever seen her, yet somehow he could not take his eyes off of her. She was smiling now and didn't even realize it. He loved this about her. The way she looked when no one was around to notice, when she was completely relaxed and could be herself. But there was more, he thought as he watched her every move. She was glowing. She looked amazing. How on earth could Nick be stupid enough to have her head over heels in love with him and treat her the way he did. Anyone would be lucky to be with her, Elliot thought. And here Nick was with her heart in the palm of his hand and all he could do was hurt her and push her away.

Elliot caught himself smiling and turned around so she wouldn't catch him staring. He still could not believe that Olivia was going to have a baby. This was exciting to him, almost as much as becoming a father himself. He was really happy for her. This was what she wanted. Definitely not the way she wanted it all to happen, but she wanted this baby so badly and now she was going to have it. Liv, would finally have a family of her own.

Elliot made popcorn and sat down beside her in hopes of her settling on something to watch. She kind of reminded him of a child who had recently learned how to work the remote control.

"Hungry?" He asked handing her the bowl.

"Starving," she replied taking a hand full of the warm popcorn and eating it one piece at a time.

Liv was a tough cop but she had a tender side as well. This was a side that most people didn't see. But he knew this Olivia well. She was almost delicate sitting here with him now. Every strand of her hair perfectly in place and her nails done. Underneath her bad ass cop exterior was a shy, sweet girl who craved approval from those close to her. She would do anything to make him happy and he knew this. He understood this about her, because he felt the same way with her. This was part of what made their bond so strong. And the reason he couldn't let Nick hurt her anymore. Olivia was street smart and could hold her own out there in the tough world they worked in. But when it came to her personal life, she was very naive and wanted more than anything for someone to love her the way she had always dreamed of being loved. This was the part that had wanted so badly not to give up on Nick, even though she knew in her mind he was not right for her. He may not be right for anyone, Elliot thought. But Olivia learned a lot from this relationship. In a way forcing the love sick little girl inside her to see the harsh truth about love. But there was one good thing that came out of the trials of this relationship, Olivia's baby. For as much as that child was a part of Nick, it was a piece of Olivia as well. Elliot was sure this baby was going to be perfect.

Liv sat the popcorn bowl down on the coffee table in front of her and stretched her legs out across his lap. She had finally settled on a channel playing "I Love Lucy" reruns and laid the remote control in the floor beside the couch. Elliot watched her carefully as she fluttered her heavy eyes trying not to fall asleep. He massaged her feet with his hands and she moaned softly in agreement with this decision.

"Liv," he said softly.

"Yeah," she said with her eyes still closed.

Elliot could feel her calf muscles relax as he moved his hands up to massage them. "Why don't you go to bed?" He asked her.

"I'm not tired," she yawned.

"Your exhausted, you've had a long day. The guest room is ready for you. Get some sleep. Tomorrow is Saturday, you can sleep in and I will even make you breakfast."

She groaned softly to him still massaging her feet. "Will you make coffee?" She asked with her eyes still closed.

"I thought you didn't drink coffee anymore," he said.

"I cut back, I only drink one cup a day."

"I will make anything you like," he said trying to bribe her to get some sleep.

"Elliot," she said opening her eyes slowly.

"Yeah," he replied/

Olivia sat up and was sitting facing him. "You take such good care of me," she said with adoring eyes as she leaned into him placing her forehead against his and looking into his eyes.

"Someone has to," he replied.

She smiled at him and her eyes sparkled like stars in the sky as she placed her hands on each side of his face and kissed him on the top of the head.

"Thank you," she whispered and with that she stood up and headed off to bed.


	21. 21 Taking Control

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Twenty One: Taking Control)_

Olivia was already up when Elliot entered the living room the next morning. She was sitting at the table wearing blue jeans and a green form fitting tee shirt. She had one leg folded under her and her hair was twisted up and held into position with a pencil. In her hand was the black ink pen she had been using to scribble little messages all over the legal pad that laid on the table in front of her. She was on the phone and it looked like she had been for the greater part of the morning. She looked up at Elliot as he entered the room shooting him a warm smile and motioning for him to come to her.

"Thank you so much Casey," he heard her say as he approached her and she hung up the phone. Olivia took a deep breath and looked up at him. He could tell she was feeling much better, he hadn't seen this confidence in her in a long time. "I have news," she said with pride.

"You do?" He asked still trying to figure out what was going on.

"Get dressed, we have to go," she replied as she handed him a cup of coffee.

"Wait, I missed something. Where are we going?" He asked still confused about what was taking place around him.

"You are taking me downtown to file formal charges against Nick," she said as she turned him toward the hallway.

"When did you decide this?" He asked. Elliot was glad she wanted to go through with it, but wanted to make sure that this was not something she was going to kick herself about later.

"I woke up early this morning and couldn't go back to sleep," she said.

"Liv, it is barely seven o'clock how early did you wake up?" Elliot said looking down at his watch.

"Ummm…. Four. Anyway, I had a lot on my mind. So I got dressed and went for a run. I always feel better after running. It just helps me think so much more clearly. I thought about this whole Nick thing and I realized that I have not been myself lately. Infact, I have not been myself since I got involved with him. Elliot every moment of the last four and a half months I have been racking my brain trying to think of what he wanted me to be. What I could do or how I could change to please him. That isn't me at all. I am tired of letting him hurt me, Elliot, and if I don't do something about it now he will keep hurting me for the rest of my life." She looked at Elliot and he could not believe he was hearing her say this. "El, it isn't just about me anymore. I have to break free of him once and for all. It's what is best for my baby. Nick is in no way fit to be anyone's father. I wanted so badly to have him in this baby's life because I know what it is like to grow up without a father. But what good would that be if my child grows up watching him hit me, or worse what if he hit the baby. I know that you have known this was the right thing all along and I know what it took for you to stand there and watch me make so many wrong ones, but I needed this to be my decision. Thank you for understanding that." Olivia placed her arms around his neck and hugged him tight. "Now, you'd better go get dressed."

Elliot started down the hallway toward his bedroom, then turned back to look at her. "Hey," he said and she raised her head to look at him. "I'm proud of you," he stated. "None of this has been easy, but you are doing the right thing." She smiled back at him and he walked into his bedroom.

Olivia walked into the police station and stopped to look around for a minute. Because the attack had taken place in her apartment and she lived in the vicinity of another precinct under normal circumstances the report would have had to be filed there. But these were not normal circumstances. Olivia was a Manhattan Special Victims Unit Detective, so they gave her the choice to file the charges in her own department if that was what she wanted. Determined to keep her personal life and work separated as much as possible she decided to file the charges across town. This would be better, she thought to herself, especially since her case would have been considered an SVU case.

Olivia felt a little foolish for a minute. What the hell had she been thinking these past few months. She had let herself fall into a trap and become one of the victims she had spent her life trying to help. And now her child was a victim as well. Olivia paused while filling out the form on her clip board and placed her hand on her barely visible belly as she felt tears start to build up in her eyes. She had to fix this, she had to make things right.


	22. 22 I Love You, Olivia Benson

_**Immediate Danger**_

_**(Chapter Twenty Two: I Love You, Olivia Benson)**_

**She took a deep breath and signed her name to the bottom of the form. Staring down at it, she felt Elliot's hand on her shoulder. Another deep breath and she walked to the desk and handed the forms across the counter to the Desk Sergeant on duty. **

"**Thank you Detective," the woman said looking up at her. "You know, you are doing the right thing. So many of us don't think these things can happen to us because of our work, but they do."**

"**Only if we let them," Olivia said looking up at her.**

"**It takes a strong person to do what you are doing," the woman said with a smile then turned to file the paper work.**

**Olivia was quiet almost the entire way back to Elliot's apartment. She sat looking out the passenger side window with her hands in her lap. In them, she clutched her copies of the restraining order and battery charges she had filed against Nick. **

"**You okay," Elliot asked quietly, not sure if she needed to talk or cry.**

"**Yeah," she whispered smiling back at him. "You know it's funny, all this time I have been trying to protect Nick. I didn't want to leave him because it would hurt him. I didn't want to file charges because it would hurt his career. Not once did he think of all of the things he was doing to hurt me…. Or this baby. And the strangest part of all is I have seen this before. I have watched men beat women and wonder why they wouldn't just leave, walk away from it all. It all seemed so simple then. I was different then, somehow. I changed so much of me to try to be what he wanted me to be. Somewhere along the way I lost myself. Before, watching other women go through this, I would gladly walk in an rough the guy up and slap some cuffs on him and haul him off to jail, without a second thought. It frustrated me when we would bring a guy in for beating his wife and she would drop the charges and he would go home to beat her some more. I have even seen the results when these cases turn deadly. And still, I stood there and did nothing while Nick did the exact same thing to me. I allowed myself to remain in that same situation, because I wanted nothing more in the world than for him to love me the way I loved him. And after he hit me, he would tell me that he loved me more than anything in the world. Even after I knew I was pregnant! Elliot what the hell is wrong with me?" **

"**Nothing," Elliot said reaching to hold her hand.**

"**I lost my mind," she replied.**

"**You loved someone who used that love as a weapon to control you. I'm not sure he ever loved you. He couldn't have! If he did then he would have done anything in his power to protect you, not hurt you! People who love you would never do anything they thought would hurt you." Elliot stared into her eyes wondering if he had said too much, wondering if she had fully understood the message of what he was trying to say. **

**They pulled up in front of his apartment as the rain began to fall. Another storm? Olivia wondered as she watched what had been a beautiful sun disappear behind a few grey clouds. They hurried inside trying to keep dry. **

**Elliot made her feel right at home in his apartment. They had pretty much always been comfortable with each other and had exchanged keys a while back. Olivia had given him her key during their second year as partners. No particular reason behind it. Just incase he should ever need to get in for some reason, he could. It was Olivia's idea actually, she had decided this the day she listed him as next of kin on her medical file. Her mother had passed away and she really had no one else. If emergency medical decisions needed to be made, Elliot was the logical choice. Besides, he knew her better than she knew her self and she trusted him, knowing he would do what was best for her. **

**She however had claimed her key to his apartment just a few months back when she returned from her undercover assignment in Oregon. When she had given him her apartment key, he was still living at home with Kathy and the kids. About a week after her return she and Elliot were sitting in a dark car at two o'clock in the morning on a steak out. Elliot turned to her out of the blue and he had something he wanted to give her. Olivia looked at him in confusion as he placed the small shiny piece of metal in her hand. **

"**I have yours and now you have mine," he said as she looked at him in the dark.**

"**Elliot, what is this?" She asked more confused now than before.**

"**The key to my apartment, I have been carrying it around since I moved in waiting for you to come back so I could give it to you." She smiled at him. "You are lucky, you know, Kathy and I dated for over a year before I gave her a key to my apartment. By that time I had already gotten her pregnant with Maureen."**

**Olivia laughed at him shaking her head. "Don't get any wise ideas," she said laughingly, "I might have to ask for mine back."**

**Elliot remembered that moment between them like it were yesterday. He looked at her now curled up on his couch. He loved having her stay with him. He wasn't sure she needed to be alone right now and with her here he knew she was safe. Nick was about to find out she had filed charges against him, Elliot knew there was going to be more trouble before things got better. **

"**How does pizza sound?" He asked her flipping through the phone book to find the delivery number.**

"**Amazing," she replied peering at him with puppy dog eyes over the arm of the couch.**

**As long as he had known her something about her was still strange to him. She was a very strong woman, confident and beautiful. Infact he thought, her confidence was part of what made her so beautiful. She was physically attractive, yes. Eyes that burned into your soul every time you looked into them, a smile like the sunshine, the most perfect body he had ever seen on a woman, she was gorgeous! Infact, had he not been married when they met or he had thought it wouldn't damage their friendship she was exactly the kind of woman he would have went for. At a glance she appeared high maintenance, kind of a princess, pretty girls usually are. But once you got to know Olivia you realized that she was very grounded and extremely smart. She could hold her own in any situation. This was part of the reason it bothered him so much to watch Nick control her the way he did. It was like caging a wild songbird or telling a star not to shine. She didn't belong to Nick, she belonged to the world and she needed to be free. **

**Elliot had tried numerous times to think of other things over the past few days, but it was no use. She was the only thing on his mind. He had always known she was beautiful, but he never noticed just how beautiful until he looked at her now. He understood the hold Nick had once had on her, because it was similar to the one she had on him. They were not romantic, but he loved her. He loved her as a friend and as his family, her and this baby and because of this love there was not a thing in the world he would not do to make her happy. This was exactly where Olivia had once stood when it came to Nick. He understood exactly, more than she could possibly understand. **

**They sat together on the couch eating pizza and talking about old times. He hadn't seen her smile this much in a long time. As they talked and laughed he realized how lucky he was to have her in his life and that he would do anything to keep her there. He loved hearing her laugh, the sound of her laughter made him happy. Still grinning Olivia looked Elliot in the eyes. He smiled back at her and he noticed a serious look spread over her face. She looked down at her hands then mumbled a few words to him. It took Elliot a few seconds to realize what she had even said.**

"**How did you know?" She asked him quietly.**

"**Know what?" He replied.**

**Olivia looked up at him, but the laughter was gone from her face. "How did you know to come back?" She asked sniffling and fighting back tears.**

**Elliot reached out and took her hand in his. "I didn't, really. I left my jacket. I could have waited and got it the next day, but I knew you had a tough day and figured I would check in on you. I thank God every day Olivia, that I did."**

**She looked at him and a tear rolled off his cheek. She hadn't actually seen him cry since his son was born. She turned herself around on the couch, leaned in to him and wrapped his arm around her. Then looked up at him with her beautiful brown eyes, "I am so lucky to have you," she whispered softly.**

"**I'm the lucky one," he replied taking a deep breath trying to regain control of his emotions. "Liv, I don't know what I would have done if I had waited. If I had come by later and found you hurt…or…or…worse." She felt his heart pounding against her back and his hand tighten around hers, he slid her back to rest against his chest as he wrapped his arms tighter against her, holding her. They didn't look at each other, they couldn't. If they did they would both break, he needed to say this to her. It was time she knew. "Olivia, I don't know what I would do if I ever lost you," he whispered and she could almost feel the pain in his voice. "You are my best friend, you are my partner, but you are so much more. You are my family, I need you." She gasped for a shallow breath to try to keep from crying and she felt him kiss her on the top of her head. Elliot tipped her head back and she saw the tears spilling from his azure blue eyes. He stared deep into the depths of browns and ambers that swirled in her eyes as he took a deep breath. **

"**I love you, Olivia Benson." He said as they held tight to each other and cried together.**

**She turned in to him, raised her hand and cupped it on the side of his face as he leaned in to place a kiss on her forehead.**

"**I love you, too Elliot." She replied softly. This was the first time these words had been spoken between the two of them with this meaning. **

**He held her tight in his arms, almost in fear that if he loosened his grip he would lose her. They curled up together on the sofa and drifted off to sleep. **


	23. 23 A Brand New Day

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Twenty Three: A Brand New Day)_

Elliot woke the next morning with Olivia still curled tight in his arms. Part of him felt if he just held her tight enough and long enough he could erase all of her pain. Last night they had exchanged heavy words, but he meant them. He wondered now as he watched her sleep peacefully in his arms with her head nestled against his chest if she had realized that he meant that he was in love with her. He brushed his thumb against her forehead removing a lock of her dark from her eyes and with this they fluttered open. She was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.

"Good morning," she said as she rolled her head to look up over his chest.

"Good morning," he replied combing his fingers through her hair. "How did you sleep?"

"Wonderfully," she replied with a smile. She turned her head to the side placing her ear against his shirt and listening to the pounding of his heart. This was the lullaby that had sung her to sleep the night before. She felt her body move with the rise and fall of each of breath he took as she held tight against him. She didn't want this perfect innocent moment to end. This moment was one of the best moments of her life, compared only to the moment she found out she was going to be a mother. "I feel so safe with you," she said softly with a yawn as she looked up at him again.

"You are safe with me," he replied raising her up to kiss her forehead. They stared into each others eyes for a moment, both of them dying inside for the moment their lips would finally meet. But this was not the time. There was too much between them now.

Olivia rolled over and sat up from the sofa. She stretched and looked at the clock on the VCR across the room, it was almost ten o'clock. She exhaled with a groan of relaxation then turned to look at Elliot. He was staring at her, he couldn't even blink, he couldn't take his eye's off of her. "This is the first time in months I have slept all the way through the night," she said as he sat up beside her.

He reached out to touch her hand, "Liv, I meant everything I said last night."

She stared at him for a moment trying to take in every detail of his face and his words. "So did I," she replied. She reached out and took his hand in hers. "Elliot," she said softly and he cupped his hand under her jaw bone looking into her eyes with undivided attention. "I can't do this right now," she said about to cry.

"I know," he whispered only half disappointed. He knew that she felt the same way and that was going to have to be enough for now. She had just come out of a bad relationship and was now pregnant and trying to put her live back together. For her, he was willing to wait. He wanted their timing to be perfect. He wanted every detail to be just the way she had always dreamed. And he knew if he ever really had her, fully and completely, he would never want to let her go. He looked at her now and had never wanted to make love to anyone more than he did her right now. But it wasn't just sexual. It was this need to be closer to her, to hold her and love her and protect her forever. He had brought this monster into her life. Now he wanted the chance to make it up to her. "Lay back down here with me," he almost begged locking their fingers together and pulling her toward him.

Olivia laid back down and put her head on his chest again, like she had never broke their embrace. She felt her breathing sync with his and their hearts beating together. She had never held so much emotion inside her at once. She wanted so badly to lean up and press her lips to his, but knew that it would never stop there. Her poor judgment in the past had made her love life a real mess and although she knew with every fiber of her being that Elliot would never hurt her, she wanted this mess with Nick to be completely over before entering another romantic relationship. She felt a tear roll off the tip of her nose and sniffled only for a second.

Elliot raised his hand and placed it softly on the back of her head. He wanted so badly to stare into her beautiful eyes, but he knew if their eyes met now that the romantic sparks and ten years of pent up hormones would get the best of him. For right now, as hard as it was to repress their desires, they had to hold off. They had waited ten long years for this, they could wait a few more months.

"Baby," he whispered strumming his fingers up and down her spine slowly over the top of her shirt.

"Yeah," she said softly trying not to look at him. She knew that if she looked in his eyes she would lose control. She smiled to herself, this was the first time he had ever called her baby. This was not something she normally liked from a significant other, infact she hated it. But with Elliot for some reason she didn't mind, she yearned to longed him say it again.

"Olivia," he whispered into her ear. "I have never loved anyone, the way that I love you."

That was it, it was done! She couldn't hold back any longer! Her face flushed with tears Olivia rolled over on top of him and pressed her lips to his.

Elliot hadn't expected this. Only dreamed it. He kissed her passionately, wildly like he had never kissed anyone in his life. Their kisses were strong and he flipped them over on the couch. Now she laid on her back staring up at him gazing into his eyes. He ran his thumb along the curves of her face trying to memorize them as they continued kissing. He moved his lips along her jaw line kissing every inch and down onto her neck. She moaned with pleasure as he kissed a tender spot on her neck. He ran his fingers through her hair. Then moved to kiss the other side of her neck. He had never seen anyone so perfectly put together. Elliot raised up over her as he kissed her lips. He broke their embrace for a moment and tried to speak, but she leaned up from below him placing her arms around his neck and pulling him back down on top of her again. She kissed him like he had never been kissed before. Her kisses were salty and sweet and he had never tasted anything better in his life.

Elliot moved his hands down and placed them on the bare skin of her belly. He raised her shirt ever so slightly and caressed her navel with his thumb. He raised up to look into her eyes again then kissed down ward over her tee shirt until he reached her midriff. He ran his hand over her skin. Olivia just watched him explore her body with wild eyes. Her once flat abdominal area was now raised slightly and her skin was soft and warm and smelled like the Shea Butter lotion she rubbed her belly down with. Elliot slid his hands over her belly as he stared at it. Olivia watched closely as he placed a small circle of soft kisses on it. She laughed slightly with the tickle of each kiss. Elliot placed both hands on her belly trying to feel the baby inside. Olivia smiled down on him, then their eyes met and he raised up to kiss her lips again.

"Liv," he whispered into her ear as he placed a kiss on her cheek.

"Yes," she whispered back to him.

Elliot brought his face back around to look into her eyes again. As he did their noses touched and he kissed her lips once more. "I want you," he whispered to her lovingly.

"I know," she exhaled softly and she drew a breath.

"No Liv," he said pushing himself into a sitting position on the couch. Olivia laid there for a second wondering what had just happened. Then she sat up to. Elliot looked deep into her eyes and placed his hand on the side of her face. "I want you and this baby," he said without a second thought.

She sighed and looked into the floor to try and process what he had just said to her. Then she tilted her head and raised her eyes to meet his once more. Elliot reached over and slid his fingers between hers as he smiled softly at her. "I want us to be together, the three of us. Let me be this baby's father."

Olivia was not sure what to think of this. She smiled at him and took a deep breath. "I think we need to slow down," she said quietly. "I want you in this baby's life, Elliot. But I am not sure this is the kind of commitment you just rush into after one make out session on a couch."

"Liv, I have five children I am fully aware of the responsibilities of raising a child."

"That was different Elliot, those were your children. Elliot, I am twelve weeks pregnant with another man's child. And that is a big adjustment for both of us. I want this, I really do," she said placing her hand against his chest. "I just don't think that I can offer you any more than this right now. At least until I get this mess with Nick settled. And figure out how I am going to make it through this pregnancy." She took a deep breath hoping he would understand. Her heart was pounding wildly in her chest.

"Olivia, I can wait for the relationship," he said holding her hand. "We have waited this long, I would wait forever for you. I love you. But I love this baby, too. I'm not going to change my mind. That would be like asking me not to love Maureen or Eli anymore. It isn't possible."

Olivia eased herself backwards across the sofa until she was against his chest and in his arms again. "I just think that is something that will come later, Elliot. I mean what if this doesn't end up working out for some reason?"

"Liv, do you honestly think that if it didn't work out that I would no longer be in your life? We just wouldn't be friends anymore or I would just stop caring about you?"

"Well, no." She answered.

"Look I could be this baby's father even if we weren't together. I am always going to love you Liv, even if it doesn't work out. And I don't think I could ever not live this kid. I have loved him from the second I found out about him."

"Him? Whose to say this baby isn't a girl?" Elliot could by her voice that she was smiling again.

"Not this one, I can just feel it. This one is a boy," Elliot said as he smiled and rubbed his hand over her belly again. "But our next one can be a girl."

"Our next one? Elliot, can we focus on getting this one out before you make plans to get me pregnant again?" Elliot smiled at her and held her tighter. "Besides, I don't even know that after going through this whole delivery thing I am going to be up to doing it again. I'm not good with pain."

"I will be there beside you, holding your hand through the entire thing," he said.

"You think so, huh? Well with this one you might be safe because you are not the one who put it in there. But if the next one is yours, then you might not want to be anywhere near me when it's born!" Olivia looked at him and smiled, she couldn't believe they were actually holding a conversation about having children together. They had never even made love and here he was talking about children. She adored him as a father and knew that he would never love this baby any less than he did his own. She just wanted to be sure they were doing the right thing for everyone involved if she agreed to it.


	24. 24 Water On The Rocks

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Twenty Four: Water On The Rocks)_

A few weeks had past and things seemed to be going wonderfully. Times between them had been good, remaining as close as they could without crossing the line. They were crazy about each other and spent much of their free time together, but had agreed it was best not to further pursue any sexual relationship until after the baby was born and Nick was out of the picture for good. Nick had almost seemed to have disappeared from their lives and things were really looking up for them. There were times when Olivia had just about but forgotten Nick all together. Then again she never would forget him completely, a part of him was growing inside her. Olivia's belly had started to grow and her secret could no longer be hidden. She and Elliot were going to have to find a way to break the news to everyone around them. Their own secret, however had remained just that, for now anyway.

Olivia sat at the desk across from Elliot tapping the end of her pencil against a pile of papers she had been reviewing. She knew the key to this case was right in front of her somewhere, but she was having trouble focusing long enough to single out any one particular detail. Her mind drifted and wondered a lot lately, not into any thoughts in particular, just away.

"Everything okay?" Elliot asked her from across the desk.

She must have zoned out again. "What?" she asked looking up at him.

"I said, is everything okay?" He studied her expression, but wasn't quite sure what this one meant. She seemed tired, he thought. But she was tired a lot lately. Elliot tried not to worry so much about her because it drove her crazy, but he couldn't help it. This woman and this baby were his life.

Liv took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, she rolled her eyes upward almost in annoyance to meet his. "I'm fine," she said looking at him. But her eyes told a different story. Wait, she wasn't fine. Olivia felt a knot harden in her stomach. She reached down and placed her hand on her stomach as she turned her eyes up to look at Elliot unsure of what was going on. But Elliot was turned around talking to Cragen about the case. She took a deep breath and tried to focus her eyes on something, anything, the room was starting to spin. That was not working so she closed her eyes tight and placed her head in her hands now finding it almost difficult to breathe. She drew in several short, shallow breaths but she could get no air. Her mouth was dry and she felt dizzy. Across her forehead tiny beads of sweat appeared and her skin felt clammy. Olivia took another deep breath as she raised her head. She jumped to her feet and ran for the ladies room.

Olivia's office chair rolled across the room and hit a trash can as she dashed out of the room. Elliot turned around to see what was going on, but she was already gone. In the back of his mind, he already knew. He distracted Cragen handing him a file of updates on their case and headed down the hallway to check on her.

Elliot stood outside the door of the ladies restroom and tapped on the frosted glass. Olivia had been in there now for almost ten minutes and no one else had gone in or come out, he was pretty sure the coast was clear. "Liv?" He called softly to her as he opened the door slowly. But no one answered. Elliot stepped inside slipping the "out of order" sign on the door and locking it behind him. "Liv?" He called again as he walked toward to open stall doors ahead of him.

She was sitting in the floor holding her head in her hands and he knew she wasn't feeling well. "Are you okay, honey?" He asked sweetly leaning in to comfort her. She groaned slightly and took a deep breath as she turned to look at him.

"I'll be fine," she said quietly with tears in her eyes. Elliot rubbed his hand across her back slowly in an attempt to make her feel better. She turned and leaned her back against the wall of the bathroom stall. Elliot reached up and felt her forehead.

"You feel a little warm," he said. "You might be coming down with something."

"It's just morning sickness, Elliot. It will pass in a few minutes, I'm fine."

"When was the last time you ate?" He asked her. He turned her and leaned her back into his arms and just held her for a minute.

"I didn't get a chance to this morning. We came in early and have been busy."

"Honey, you have to eat." He brushed back a few stray strands of hair that had fallen loose from her ponytail.

"Elliot, if I eat, I get sick."

"Liv, if you don't eat you get sick. Why don't I take you home and let you get some sleep?"

"Elliot, we have work to do. I can't go home and take a nap every day because I'm pregnant."

"You are right. But you can't run yourself ragged either Liv, you have to take care of yourself for this baby."

"I know," she whispered looking at him like she was ashamed.

Elliot leaned in and kissed her forehead. "Are you sure you are okay?" He asked bringing himself to his feet and extending his hand to her.

"Yeah," she said softly. "Could you bring me my purse?" She asked as they walked around the stall door to the sink. Sitting on the counter was her purse from her locker. Liv turned and smiled at Elliot.

"I had a feeling this was why you were in here," he said as she opened her bag and took out the travel toothbrush she now kept inside just for this reason. She turned around and hugged Elliot.

"What would I do with out you?" She asked looking up at him.

Elliot leaned down and kissed her cheek. "When you are done here I'm taking you to lunch. I guess I'm going to have to make sure you eat from now on." She smiled at him in adoration and he gently kissed the side of her neck.

"I'll be out in a minute," she said as he walked out the door closing it behind him.

Elliot chose a little Italian restaurant about twelve miles outside of town. He did this so they could actually have some time alone, a romantic meal and the chance to talk. They sat in a small booth in the back room where they could find a little more privacy. Olivia was slid in close to him and he had his arm around her. There were candles on the table and wine glasses, now filled with sparkling water. Liv had eaten a few crackers and a bread stick while waiting for their food and was now feeling much better. She stared at him and he smiled. He reached up and pulled the ponytail holder from her hair and roughed it up a bit. Her wavy strands seemed to fall exactly into place as if each was assigned a reserved spot in which to rest. She laughed and he leaned in to kiss her. One kiss turned into another and another…. They sat alone in the back room kissing passionately and holding each other.

Liv placed her head on Elliot's shoulder. "How are we going to tell people?" She asked. They all knew about her relationship with Nick and what he had put her through. But Casey was the only one at work who knew anything about Olivia's pregnancy. Liv smiled at Elliot. He smiled back at her and she laughed.

"What?" He asked.

She leaned back and looked done at her belly, at this angle it was very noticeable. She smiled again and took his hand in hers placing his fingertips just below her navel. "There," she said looking at him and her eyes lit up like fireworks. "Do you feel that?" Elliot nodded his head and a smile spread all the way across his face.

"Wow," he said. Elliot rubbed his hands in a circle around her belly then kissed her shirt right over the spot where the baby had kicked. This was the first time they had ever felt the baby move. Elliot leaned in and kissed her again as the waiter brought the tray of food they had ordered to their table.

After lunch it was back to work. Liv and Elliot had invited the entire crew to go out for drinks after work. Little did Cragen know this time he wouldn't be the only one ordering water from little green bottles.

They all sat around the table in their usual order trading stories. After about the third round Fin looked up at Olivia and asked "What's with the water? Are you the designated driver for the evening?"

Olivia looked at Elliot, this was not how they had planned to do this but she could not pass up the chance. "No," she said looking up at Fin. "I'm pregnant."

Fin looked confused. Olivia stood horrified for a second by the silence that had fallen over the group surrounding their table. Her eyes flashed to meet Elliot's in panic. Just as Elliot stood up to speak….

"Congratulations!" Casey said from the other side of the table. Olivia looked over at her and smiled. "I think this calls for a toast," Casey continued. And with in moments all of their glasses were raised. Everyone seemed to be very accepting and even a little excited. Olivia knew they all had questions, but wouldn't dare ask them now. Later in the evening Casey stood up to go to the bar and get another round for the table. Olivia walked up beside her.

"I owe you one," Liv said to Casey.

"No, you don't owe me anything," Casey said smiling and looking down at Olivia's more obvious belly. She placed her hands over the small bump and felt the baby move inside. "I am so happy for you Olivia," she said.

"I couldn't have done any of this with out your help," Olivia replied. "I couldn't get away from him the way I needed to. I confided in you and you held the confidence. I really appreciate that. I guess it comes with the job," Olivia said as the two of them sat down on barstools to wait for the drinks.

"It comes with the friendship," Casey said placing her hand over Olivia's. "You know, everyone here is going to be here to support you."

"Yeah," Olivia replied looking at Casey with tears in her eyes.

"Oh, don't cry or I will too," Casey said standing to hug Liv. They both laughed as they got teary eyed. "It's a man's world out there Olivia. We women have to stick together."

"I'll drink to that," Olivia said with a laugh raising her water on the rocks to Casey's bourbon glass. Olivia helped Casey carry the drinks back to the table. A few moments later Elliot approached Liv and pulled her aside.

"Things are going pretty well," he said.

"Yeah, that went much better than I thought it would." She smiled at him then they returned to the table to celebrate with their friends.


	25. 25 Threatened

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Twenty Five: Threatened)_

They were laying on the sofa in Elliot's apartment one evening watching an old black and white movie together when Olivia's cell phone rang on the kitchen table. She stood up and walked in to answer it. When she opened the phone and placed it to her ear she knew who it was. With out looking, without even hearing his voice Liv had a feeling it was Nick on the other end of the line. She was right.

"Olivia?" He asked in a stern voice.

Elliot had been watching her to see who it was when he noticed the troubled expression come across her face.

"Why are you calling me?" She asked instinctively placing one hand over her belly to feel her baby kicking.

"I miss you, Olivia. I just want to talk. Please just talk to me." Nick begged.

Elliot walked over to her and breathed the words "hang up." But Olivia just stood there listening, unsure of what to do.

"Nick, you are not supposed to call me. That is in your restraining order. You are not supposed to have any contact at all with me." She was sick of having this same fight with him, how could he not get this through his head? It was crystal clear and written on two pages in black and white!

"Olivia, just open the door and let me in. We can work this out."

With that Olivia looked up at Elliot with a frightened look on her face. She held the phone away from her face and whispered to Elliot, "he's at my apartment. He doesn't realize that I am not there."

Elliot moved quickly for his cell phone and called Fin.

"Nick, you are not supposed to be within one hundred yards of my residence or work place. It says that in the papers. You need to leave."

"Olivia, just open the door!" Nick shouted into the phone.

Liv could hear the buzzer to her apartment going off over the phone and heard Nick kick the locked door.

"Nick, you need to leave. Leave now. I don't want to see or hear from you anymore!"

Fin and Munch were on their way to Olivia's apartment to pick Nick up for violating the conditions of the restraining order.

"Olivia, this is my baby too."

Liv felt a big knot in her throat and she began to cry. Now he wanted the baby, too?

"I don't want you anywhere near this baby," she said to him. "Stay away from me!"

She could hear the sirens of the police cars over the phone. Munch and Fin were close.

"Stay away? We are having a baby, how can I stay away?"

"No Nick, I am having a baby! Alone! And I don't want anything to do with you ever again! Just leave me alone!" She shouted at him through tears. Elliot tried to take the phone from her to keep Nick from threatening her, but it was too late.

"I will be in my kids life! Now we can do this the easy way and you come back to me, let me make this right and raise our child together. Or we can do it the hard way! Trust me Olivia, you don't want to do it the hard way! Because no judge in their right mind is going to give a baby to a single cop mother on your salary! I'm a doctor, I have the money and the means to provide for this child everything it needs! Don't fight me! I won't lose! And if you run, I will find you!"

Olivia was horrified. She dropped the phone on the counter and looked up at Elliot now standing in front of her not sure of what had been said.

"You called the cops Bitch?" Olivia looked back at the phone on the counter and could hear Nick yelling. Elliot reached up and closed the phone disconnecting the phone.

Olivia broke down. She dropped to the floor and cried, she didn't know what else to do. She was so afraid that Nick was right. Elliot sat down in the floor beside her and held her hand. He waited a few minutes to let her calm down before trying to pull the details of the conversation from her.

"What did he say?" Elliot asked.

She looked at him with a lost look in her eyes. "He said he wants me to come back. He wants us to raise the baby together. If I don't, he's going to try to take the baby from me. Elliot, he wants my baby," she sobbed.

Elliot stood up and picked up the phone from the counter. "He doesn't want the baby," he said, "he wants you." He walked across the room and called Fin again to see how the arrest had gone.

"We got him," Fin said. "Someone in the building must have called in a complaint about the noise, when we got here there were already two uniforms trying to calm him down. Your lucky she wasn't here. It got pretty heated. He tagged one of the officers and they roughed him up a bit before he got cuffed. I'm just glad Liv didn't have to see any of this. How's she doing?"

"He threatened her. He said he'd take the baby." Elliot replied.

"Well, we're going to do what ever we can to make sure that don't happen. We're already trying to find some dirt on the guy. Collar him for assaulting that officer, that will muddy up his file a bit. We'll see if we can find any past girlfriends he was violent with. Tell Liv to hang in there."

"Yeah," Elliot said hanging up the phone. He looked at her. She was sitting in the floor with her knees drawn up to her chest or as close as she could get them. She looked so warn out, this was all so hard on her. She turned her attention to him as if asking him what he found out, but she didn't say a word.

"They got him," Elliot said extending his hand to help her to her feet. He held her hand and walked her over to the couch where they curled up together. When Elliot wrapped his arms around her he could still feel her shaking.

"He'll be out by tomorrow," she said and Elliot knew that it was probably true.

He held her tight and kissed her lips. "Munch and Fin are trying to find everything they can on him. Someone in your building called in a noise complaint. The uniforms were trying to calm him when Munch and Fin arrived. He punched one of the other cops. Liv, that's assault against a cop. It will tie him up for a little while."

"What am I going to do?" She asked softly. "Elliot, if he gets custody…."

"Then we will run," Elliot said. Olivia turned to look at him. "We will pack up whatever we need and I will move you somewhere safe." She couldn't believe she had just heard him say it.

"Just like that, walk away from our lives? Elliot, what about your kids?"

"I can come back to visit them. Look Liv, I don't know what to do. Maybe with your charges and these from this cop, he could get two to five years. Maybe, by then he will just give up."

"He scares me El," She said and he tightened his arms around her.

"He scares me too," he replied. "I'll call Casey later and see what kind of case we can get. Honey, we are going to do everything we can." Elliot kissed her tenderly. "When this is all over, I think we should go away together. Just you and me. Somewhere secluded, somewhere we can just relax and unwind. I don't like you being under all of this stress." He exhaled and looked deep into her eyes, "I love you more than life itself."

"I love you too," she whispered as she laced her fingers between his. "I'm sorry I got you caught up in this."

"Baby, I'm sorry. I'm the one who brought this monster into your life. I gave him your phone number. I pushed you in to dating him. This is all my fault." Elliot looked at her with regret in his eyes.

"Elliot, as much as I want to be rid of him, I don't regret being with him. If you hadn't pushed me to date him, I wouldn't be having this baby." She ran Elliot's hand over her belly and smiled at him.

"It's getting late," he replied kissing her again. "You should try to get some rest." She smiled at him and kissed his lips.

"You take such good care of me."

"Come on," he said turning off the television and leading her by the hand toward the bedroom.

Laying in bed with her in his arms Elliot looked into Olivia's tired eyes. "Goodnight my darling," he whispered against her ear. "I love you and I will see you in the morning."

"Ummmm," Olivia moaned softly. "Goodnight." Then she drifted off to sleep in the arms of the only man she ever truly loved.


	26. 26 Another Man's Child

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Twenty Six: Another Man's Child)_

Olivia awoke the next morning and opened her eyes. She didn't move or get up but just stared across the bed at Elliot. He was already awake and had been laying there still and quiet looking at her. She smiled and ran her hand across the bed placing it flat against his. He looked into her eyes and she smiled at him.

"What are you doing?" She said softly.

"Watching you sleep. You are the most beautiful thing I have ever seen," he said.

She groaned slightly and rolled over onto her back. Elliot raised his head up on his hand and leaned in to kiss her.

"Wonderful way to start the day," she replied with a smile.

Elliot leaned down and placed both of his hands on her belly feeling every inch of the surface then kissed it. "The big day," he said smiling at her.

"Well, one of them." She replied sitting herself up in the bed. "I am so glad you are going with me."

Elliot placed his hand behind her head and kissed her again, "I wouldn't miss it for the world."

Olivia took a long hot shower to ease away all of her early morning pregnancy aches while Elliot made breakfast for the two of them. He had made it a point to do everything he could to make sure she was well taken care of. For the last few weeks they had rotated staying at her place a few days and then his a couple, but had spent only a few apart. They never had sex or anything like that. They would just hold each other close and fall asleep in each others arms each night. Olivia hadn't been sleeping well and Elliot figured it was due to all of the stress in her life. Having him there with her made her feel safe and allowed her to fall asleep and stay asleep each night. Neither of them minded this at all. He loved just holding her. Infact holding her was more fulfilling than many sexual encounters he'd had with women in the past.

Elliot poured her a hot cup of coffee and slid it across the counter.

"I really need to cut back more, even one a day is a lot." She looked up at him.

"I switched to decaf," he said kissing her forehead, "try it, it isn't bad."

Olivia seemed pleased with her coffee. And with the omelet he cooked her with peppers, tomatoes, bacon and cheese.

After breakfast they were off to Olivia's doctors appointment. The wait seemed to be forever and she had to pee three times before they were finally shown back to the room. Olivia studied the development charts on the wall as Elliot studied her. She had finally gotten past the morning sickness and started to gain some weight. She often made comments about her weight, but Elliot had never seen anyone look more beautiful. He really couldn't tell she had gained any weight except for her belly. Even that appeared as if someone had placed a basketball under her shirt. A basketball that kicks, he thought.

Finally the doctor entered the room. Liv was sitting on the end of the table with her hand under her belly looking down at her feet.

"How are we doing?" Her doctor asked with a smile.

"Pretty good," Olivia practically purred.

"Is this daddy?" The woman asked looking at Elliot.

"Umm…. Well…" Olivia stuttered.

"Yes," Elliot replied extending a hand to introduce himself to the woman.

Olivia turned and looked at him shaking her head.

"Okay, lets get started." The woman said. "You are just about twenty two weeks, now right?"

"Yes," Liv answered her.

Olivia laid back on the table and the woman moved her hands around her belly. She asked several questions and answered any that Olivia had.

"Now for the fun part," she said turning to the ultra sound machine and picking up the wand. She put some gel on Olivia's belly and moved the wand around on it for a few seconds before she found the baby. Liv had had an ultrasound earlier in the pregnancy. Elliot was supposed to go with her then also, but ended up having to go out with Fin and Munch and make an arrest for a case. Until now, he had only seen the baby in the pictures Liv had shown him from the other ultrasound. Elliot stood there staring at the dark screen watching the shadows move. He listened to the beating of the baby's heart and placed his finger on the monitor. He turned to Olivia who was watching him with a smile and kissed her gently on the lips, never had he wanted more for this child inside her to be his.

"Lets see if we can get a better look," the doctor said as she lightly against Olivia's belly to get the baby to move. She took some measurements and even printed pictures of the baby from different angles. Elliot laughed. It was almost as if this kid was posing for them.

"Everything looks great, Olivia. You seem to be right on track," the doctor replied.

Elliot took Olivia's hand in his and kissed her forehead, he had forgotten how amazing this feeling was and he knew how excited she must be at this moment. Afterward Elliot stepped out in the waiting room while Olivia finished signing some insurance forms. She turned to walk out to meet him looking down at the ultrasound pictures in her hand.

"Olivia," the doctor called from behind her.

"Yeah," she said turning around to face her.

"Would you like to know the sex of your baby?"

"You can tell?" Olivia thought about it for a moment. Part of her had kind of wanted to wait and be surprised.

A few minutes later she was walking out to the car with Elliot. She stopped on the sidewalk and put her hand on her belly and smiled.

"Elliot," she called to him.

Elliot walked over and put his hands on her belly. "Is everything okay?" He asked.

"Kicking up a storm," she said with a smile. Elliot looked up at her as he felt the baby moving. "It's a boy," she said softly as she smiled at him.

"Yeah?" He asked.

"Yeah," she grinned.

Elliot put his thumb against her cheek and wrapped his arms around her and kissed her tenderly. "A boy," he said. "Wow." They both laughed as they walked to the car.

That night they sat on the sofa in her apartment looking through the ultra sound pictures once more. Elliot stood up and went into the other room for a moment then returned with a small gift box. He handed it to her then sat down beside her again.

"What is this?" she asked.

"Just a little something, open it."

It was a silver picture frame to hold the ultrasound pictures. Olivia smiled at him.

"Do you like it?" He asked.

"Elliot, it's beautiful. I love it. Thank you," she said as she hugged him tight.

"Well I knew you were getting more pictures today. I saw it in the hospital gift shop, I thought it was perfect."

"It is perfect," she said with excitement. "But when did you have time to go into the hospital gift shop?"

"The first time you had to pee. While I was waiting I stepped in for a minute and there it was on the counter."

"It is sweet. And will look great on the night stand next to the rocking chair in the nursery." She gazed at him adoringly.

"You know you still have to pick wall paper so I can get the crib put together. And names, this little man needs a name. Have you thought of any?"

"No, I have not even had time to think about it. I bought a baby name book at the book store a few weeks ago, but I have not even looked at it."

That night laying in bed neither of them could sleep, they were too wound up from all of the excitement of the day.

"Elliot," she said.

"Yes Liv," he replied.

She raised up to look at him. "Today, when you told that doctor that you were the baby's father….you don't know how bad I wish that were true."

"So do I," he replied twisting a strand of her hair around his fingertip.

"Marry me, Liv." She just stared at him for a moment.

"Elliot, I can't. I am not ready for anything like that."

"I know," he replied. "Not right now, when you are ready. Marry me and let me adopt this baby. I want to be his father. His father and your husband, more than anything in the world. Just say you will."

"I love you with all of my heart, Elliot. And if there was anyone I could see myself married to it would be you. But I can't, I won't agree to something that big right now. Elliot, we have not even dated. What if we are not compatible? What if we try this and it is a complete disaster?"

Elliot just stared at her making excuses. "Hey," he said putting his hand to the side of her face. "I'm not tying to push you into anything. You are not ready, I understand that. It's okay, if that is how you feel. But don't be surprised if I ask you again later down the road. I just don't see my position changing on this."

She smiled at him. "I'm sorry," she said softly. "I have never loved anyone more than I love you. And I would love to be your wife, someday. I just don't think we should start making promises about it now. I want to be able to have a real relationship with you first, you know?"

"I know," he said and kissed her lips.

"And I still have this thing with Nick. I don't know what I will do if he tries to take this baby. I am not giving him my child! I just wish this baby wasn't his, then Nick couldn't use him as a pawn to control my life."

Elliot's eyes lit up and he raised his head to look at her. "That's it Liv."

"What is it, Elliot?" she replied confused.

"He only wants this baby because he thinks he will have some kind of control over you. He wants you and this baby is the only chance of him getting you back."

"That's what he thinks, yes." She nodded, still confused.

"What if it wasn't his baby?"

"Elliot, it is his baby. There is no other possibility."

"But what if there was?"

"What are you talking about?" Now she was completely lost and starting to get agitated.

"You said he accused you of sleeping with me."

"Yes, but I didn't. We didn't"

"But he doesn't know that for sure. Put my name on the birth certificate. If you tell him the baby is not his and the birth certificate backs that up…."

"Elliot what if he wants a DNA test."

"It is worth a try. We will go into hiding before I let that man raise this baby."

"This is crazy, Elliot. It's a lie."

"But it is a lie that could protect your child Olivia." She looked into his eyes unsure of what to do. "You put my name on his birth certificate as the father. You give him my last name. If Nick keeps harassing you, then we file more charges and get an Order of Protection for you and the baby have his ass put back in jail."

"I just need time to think about it, Elliot. A lie like this, it's big. This will change my son's life forever."

"But it will change for the better, Liv. I love this baby. I will give him everything a child should have in a father. I would do anything for you and for him."

"And what about Kathy and your children with her? How do you think they would feel about this?"

"I don't care what Kathy thinks anymore! And my kids love you! They will love this baby, too. They don't have to really even know about all of this part. Just that if we do get married, this baby would be their brother. I think they would love it."

"I just need time to think, Elliot. I'm still not sure this would even work."

"Just promise me you will consider it."

"Okay," she said with a yawn. "Now can we get some sleep?"

The next before work Olivia was quiet. "Do you really think it will work?" She asked Elliot with a troubled look.

"What could it hurt? At least this way he will have a chance. Look Liv, I can't change his DNA. But I can change his name," Elliot said placing his hands on her belly.

"Okay." She said looking at him. "If you are sure this is what you want, then that is what we will do."

"I'm sure," Elliot said squeezing her hand in his.


	27. 27 Olivia's Angel

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Twenty Seven: Olivia's Angel)_

The next few weeks passed quickly. Elliot had finally completed the nursery in Olivia's apartment and they now stood looking at the finished project. It looked like a page from a catalogue. The walls were covered in wooden white trim half way up from the floor. From there to the ceiling a dusty blue color and Olivia had stenciled clouds on the walls. The crib was a dark cherry finish and matched the changing table, dresser, nightstand and rocking chair in the room. In the rocking chair sat a large blue puppy dog with a darker blue patch over one eye. This had been a gift from Elliot shortly after finding out the baby was a boy. A lamp on top the dresser projected images of stars onto the ceiling of the room and on the nightstand, the frame Elliot had bought her with one of the baby's ultrasound pictures in it. This baby already had more clothing than Elliot and Olivia combined. Olivia had just about everything she needed.

"What do you think?" Elliot asked her proud of the job he had done.

"It's perfect," she said with a warm smile.

"Now we're ready for him. This baby with out a name," Elliot said looking at her.

"I will think of something," she said. "He is going to have this name for the rest of his life, I want it to be a good one. Besides, I am barely seven months, we still have time."

"Are you sure you are going to be okay here by yourself the next two days?" Elliot asked her.

"El, I lived here by myself for a long time before you started staying here. I'm sure everything will be fine."

"I wish he would have sent someone else. I mean, Munch came in from Boston! Can't he go?" She could tell he was really trying to avoid leaving her while she was big pregnant. Elliot was trying everything he could think of to try to get out of this trip.

"They asked for the best! And since I am seven months pregnant, Cragen is sending you!" She smiled at him, hoping that would bring a smile to his face.

Elliot laughed, "you think so, huh?"

"I will be fine. I have Munch and Fin on speed dial. Everyone knows that I am going to be here alone. You know Cragen will have someone patrol and you will call me at least twice a day. Honey, it is going to be okay. I had another appointment yesterday, everything is fine with the baby. We're right on track."

"I just hate leaving you."

"I know you do, but it is only two days. Go, don't worry, try to have a good time. I love you." She hugged him tight and kissed him, then rubbed her nose against his.

Olivia grabbed the car keys and Elliot grabbed his suitcase and they left for the airport.

The next night alone in a Boston hotel room, Elliot had a bad dream. When he woke, he couldn't even remember what it was. But it was awful. In it something horrible happened to Olivia and the baby. Elliot felt almost sick. He tried to go back to sleep, but he couldn't. He laid in the dark worrying about her. In New York it was well after midnight, if he called and woke her she might not get back to sleep. He laid there looking at the empty pillow beside him wishing she were laying next to him asleep. He wondered if she realized that he needed her just as bad as she needed him. It was no use. He had to call her.

The phone rang twice before she answered. "Is everything okay?" She sounded really worried.

"Yeah, baby everything is fine. Are you okay?" He asked.

"I'm fine El," she sounded tired.

"Honey, I'm sorry I woke you."

"You didn't, I couldn't sleep. I'm just kind of laying here in the dark. Thinking of you, holding your pillow. I have had an awful feeling all day. I was worried."

"I just had this awful dream. I really needed to hear your voice."

"I miss you," she said softly.

"I miss you too baby. I'll be home tomorrow. I can't wait to see you."

"I can't wait to see you either. I wish you were here with me."

"So do I sweetheart. You close your pretty eyes and try to get some sleep. I will see you tomorrow."

"Elliot, I love you."

"I love you, too." With that he hung up the phone. Elliot laid there for a few more hours thinking about her, worrying about her. Finally he fell asleep.

The next day after he got back into town he stopped by work to check his messages. Munch was sitting at his desk when Elliot walked by.

"Welcome back, buddy." He said with a smile.

"Look, I appreciate you keeping an eye on things while I was gone. I just worry about her, you know?" Elliot said.

"Yeah. Listen I called and talked to Casey about the other day. She said Liv should file a report so it goes in his file." Munch said.

Elliot dropped the stack of papers in his hand. "What the Hell are you talking about?"

"Liv, hasn't told you yet? Okay, this is awkward." Munch said.

"Munch, what the Hell happened?"

"Nothing, much. I picked Olivia up and took her out to lunch at this little café downtown. While we were sitting there, outside, eating she saw Nick's car sitting across the street. He was watching us. He wasn't close enough to pick him up Elliot. But it rattled her. I took her home and stayed with her for a little while. Everything seemed fine. She said she was okay, but I was nervous about leaving her there alone. I called in a uniform to circle the block a couple times an hour and keep an eye on things. I'm sure she was going to tell you, she probably just didn't want to scare you."

"I'm sure you are right. Listen, thanks. I'd better get going."

Elliot headed back to his apartment where Olivia was waiting for him. When he returned she had the table set and dinner made. She greeted him at the door with a kiss.

"Hey," she said with a smile. "There's my man. Well, one of them." She had her hands on her belly.

Elliot hugged her tight and looked into her eyes. "Liv, why didn't you tell me you saw him?"

"Damn it Munch!" She said as she pushed the door shut and leaned against it. "Because I didn't want to worry you. You were in Boston, there wasn't anything you could have done and I didn't want to make you feel bad for going. Nothing happened. We saw him on the street at the restaurant and then he drove past my apartment. Munch put a uniform on the place and he didn't come back. I was going to tell you. I just kind of wanted to see you first." She saw the fear in his eyes and leaned in to hug him. "I went down this morning and filed a complaint, it will be in his file."

"Good girl," Elliot said as he kissed her.

"Are you hungry," she asked. "I made lasagna."

"I'm starving and it smells wonderful."

Two days later Olivia was walking in the parking garage and thought she heard footsteps behind her. When she turned around no one was there. She hurried to the elevator, climbed inside and pushed the button. But the doors didn't close in time. Before she knew it, there was Nick standing in front of her. She tried to escape before the door closed, but it was no use. She was trapped in the elevator alone with him. Nick waited until the elevator was between two floors and pulled the emergency stop button.

Olivia stood quiet against the wall trying not to look at him, not to cry.

"I missed you baby," he said as he reached out to touch her face.

"Nick please," she pleaded. She could feel the warmth of her tears on her face.

"I don't want to hurt you, why are you so afraid of me? I love you Olivia." He reached out to touch her arm, but she pulled away from him.

"Nick, stop! Please stop!"

Nick leaned in to kiss her and she pushed him away. He grabbed her wrist and backed her up against the elevator door, held her chin and kissed her. He stopped and looked into her eyes.

Olivia slapped him. Bad move. Nick grabbed her by the hair and slammed her up against the wall pinning her there.

Olivia felt a sharp pain in her abdomen, and started to buckle to the floor, but he held her up. She gasped for air as tears rolled down her face, she knew something was terribly wrong.

"Nick, please stop! You're hurting me." She looked up at him. "It isn't your baby," she gasped.

"No?" He asked.

"No." She replied. She could still feel pains in her belly and prayed her baby was okay.

"Whose is it?" He asked.

"It's Elliot's. You were right all along. I screwed up. I didn't want to hurt you."

"You got a restraining order, had me arrested and wouldn't talk to me all this time, but you didn't want to hurt me. I wanted to marry you Olivia. Spend the rest of our lives together." While he was talking she grabbed the rail with her hand and lowered herself to the elevator floor. She was in an extreme amount of pain, but was afraid to let him know.

Olivia sat in the corner of the tiny elevator with one hand under her belly just trying to remember to breathe, trying to keep herself calm and hoping this was not labor. She moved her right hand in small circles on top her belly trying to calm the pain, but it wasn't stopping. She gasped for a moment when she felt the baby kick and a tear rolled down her face. At least she knew he was still alive, for now. Nick paced inside the tiny metal box rambling on and on, she had no idea what he was saying. She was in too much pain to hear his words. She tried to focus of feeling the baby move. Just one more kick, she thought and then another. She looked up at Nick and he was looking down at her. He had asked her a question. Olivia just nodded her head. She felt weak and light headed, but she couldn't pass out now she had to stay awake. She exhaled heavily, she wanted to scream, but was afraid of what he would do to her if she did. Okay, that she knew was a contraction.

"Olivia," Nick said and she looked back up at him. She had to get out of here.

"What?" She asked him.

"I asked you to marry me…."

Not quite the proposal she had gotten from Elliot, but if it got her out of this elevator it would work.

"Okay," she said, but didn't mean.

Nick was talking again. But she had another contraction and couldn't focus on anything but trying not to scream. If she had her gun she would kill him, she thought. Panting heavily to another silent contraction. If she didn't get out of here soon she and this baby would die.

"Nick," she whispered barely able to speak. He looked down at her, "I'm in labor." She said praying he had some kind of conscience and would get her to a hospital. Part of her was afraid he would try to deliver this baby himself. "Please, it's too early. I need to go to a hospital now," she said breathing heavily.

Nick pushed the button again and the elevator started moving. "I am parked on the next level," he told her. "You wait right here," he said pulling the stop again, "I will go get the car."

Olivia nodded to him. She watched until he was out of sight and hit the button again to start the elevator. It climber slowly to the next level and the doors opened. Olivia pulled herself to her feet holding on to the railing. She took a few steps forward out of the doors and into the parking garage and had another contraction. She placed her hand under her belly and felt something warm and wet. Glancing down she noticed the cotton dress she had on was soaked in blood. "God, no." She whimpered and she looked around the garage for signs of life. "Somebody help me!" She screamed, but no one seemed to hear her. She heard the elevator start to move behind her. What if it is Nick? She thought as she scanned the area for a place to hide.

She moved as quickly as she could in toward the middle of the garage and hid between two cars. This would have to do for now. She wasn't going to be able to move much further, her contractions were coming stronger and closer together and she wasn't sure if her water had broken or not.

Olivia tried to remain quiet when she felt another contraction and made only muffled groans in her pain. She heard the elevator doors open and someone step out. "God, please." She mumbled under her breath. As she dragged herself to the front of the SUV she was sitting by. Olivia slid as far as she could in front of the vehicle and positioned herself between it and the wall. She checked her pockets hoping to find her cell phone, but she didn't have it.

She heard the footsteps getting closer to her and she felt faint. She had lost a lot of blood ad hadn't felt her baby move in a little while. She tipped her head back as the footsteps closed in on her. She was breathing heavily and about to pass out. She looked up an raised her arm over her head to see a tall figure standing over her. She closed her eyes and groaned loudly thought a hard contraction. As she did she kicked the SUV causing it to move and set off the car alarm. She heard foot steps running away and the security guard came running to see what the commotion was all about. "Help me please," she screamed in pain then she blacked out.

Olivia woke up a few minutes later in the back of the ambulance on the way to the hospital. She was still in pain and worried about her baby. She tried to remove the oxygen mask to speak to the paramedic, but the man told her to lay down and try to relax. "It's too early," she gasped. "Call Elliot," then she passed out again.

Word quickly made up to their floor that a pregnant woman in the parking lot had collapsed and been rushed to the hospital, Elliot knew it was her. "Fin, find Nick!" He shouted and ran out the door. Elliot arrived at the hospital just as his phone rang. It was the hospital notifying him as Olivia's next of kin that she had been brought in. He moved quickly upstairs to the floor where they had taken her.

Elliot got to the desk and the woman behind it was not much help. Moments later he heard Olivia scream in pain.

"Liv," he shouted as he ran down the hall to find doctors pushing her into the delivery room.

"You can't go in there!" A woman shouted.

"This is my baby," Elliot told her.

"Come with me," she said, "you have to get scrubbed in."

Within moments Elliot was by her side and holding her hand. Olivia was in a lot of pain, but she was too far into labor for them to give her any drugs. Elliot hated knowing she was in so much pain and he couldn't help her. He held tight to Olivia's hand as each contraction came harder and closer than the last.

"Okay Olivia, on this next one I need you to push."

"No," she screamed in pain as the full force of the contraction hit her. "It's too early!"

"Olivia, it is time! Now is time! You have to stop fighting these contractions and push!" The doctor looked up at Elliot. "If we don't get this baby out and fast I will have to do an emergency cesarean, she has really lost too much blood for surgery. We need this baby out now or we could lose them both!"

Olivia was in too much pain to even hear what the doctor was saying. All she could hear, all she wanted to hear was Elliot's voice.

"Liv," he said holding her hand tight in his and leaning in behind her to look into her eyes. She was so tired and so scared. Elliot brushed a sweat soaked strand of hair from her eyes. "Baby, it's time to push."

"It's too early," she gasped.

"I know baby, but it's okay. The doctor says it is time."

"I can't," she whispered and he felt her grip on his hand weaken.

"Yes, you can! I am right here beside you and I'm not going anywhere."

Olivia started to groan with an oncoming contraction.

"Okay Olivia, on three I want you to push as hard as you can," the doctor said. "One…Two…Three…Push!"

Elliot leaned in behind her to help her push. Olivia groaned and panted and pushed hard. Then fell back against him as it passed. Elliot could feel her getting weaker. "Good job, baby. We're almost there." She looked up at him and he saw the pain and fear in her eyes. He felt her tense up and start to groan as the next one came.

"Ready," the doctor said. "One…Two…Three…Push!"

Olivia pushed even harder and longer than the last time. Elliot just wanted her pain to end. He had been through this before with Kathy. But Kathy had drugs. She was in pain, but not like this.

"The baby's head is crowning!" The doctor announced. "Okay Olivia, just a couple more pushes and your baby will be here! Ready, One…Two…Three…Push!"

Another big push and she fell back into his arms gasping trying to catch her breath.

"Good Girl, the head is out! One more Olivia, I need a big one. Ready,"

Olivia looked up at Elliot and squeezed his hand.

"I love you so much baby," he said looking into her eyes. She was getting really pale. "One more, you can do this." She looked into his eyes and nodded in agreement.

"I love you," she gasped and started to groan with the contraction.

"One…Two…Three…Push!" The doctor shouted.

Olivia pushed until she couldn't push anymore. She screamed and gasped and panted and cried. And Elliot held her as tight as he could.

"We have a baby! And it's a boy!" The doctor shouted.

Elliot kissed her forehead as she collapsed in his arms. They both sat almost afraid to breathe as she silence echoed through the room.

"El," Olivia gasped as she looked up at him about to break down. "Why isn't he crying?"

Elliot was not sure what to tell her.

The doctor held the baby below the sheet where they could not see him. They were both about to panic when the baby screeched and began to cry. Elliot and Olivia both broke down in tears. Elliot leaned down and kissed her lips.

"You did it," he said wiping the sweat from her brow and kissing her again.

"We did it," she whispered as she started to shiver and he kissed her lips.

"I love you," Elliot brushed her hair back with his thumb.

Olivia looked up at him, but something in her eyes didn't look right. "I love you, too." Said softly then collapsed in his arms.

A nurse had grabbed the baby as soon as he cried and rushed him out of the room to be examined. Elliot looked at Olivia.

"Doctor!" He shouted.

"She is going into shock, we need to get some blood into her." And with that they rushed Olivia out of the room as well.


	28. 28 A New Beginning

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Twenty Eight: A New Beginning)_

A few hours later Olivia fluttered her eyes open and looked around the room. Her entire body was achy and her head was killing her. She took a deep breath and turned her head.

"Hey," Elliot said reaching to hold her hand.

"Hey," she said softly and smiled at him.

Elliot leaned in to kiss her. "How do you feel?"

She moaned a little, "Like I just gave birth."

"You are so amazing," he said gazing lovingly into her tired eyes.

"So are you." She raised her hand and placed it in his. He held hers tight. "Have you seen him?" She asked.

"Not yet. The doctor hasn't said much, they are still checking him out. They were probably waiting for you to wake up to give me any news."

Olivia reached over and hit the call button for the nurse. She looked at Elliot and reached her fingers out to touch a small bandage on the bend of his right arm. She looked up at him confused.

"You needed blood, we are the same blood type." He said.

"You saved my life again, Detective Stabler." She replied with an exhausted smile. "I am so scared, Elliot."

Elliot moved in and kissed her cheek. "Munch and Fin are trying to find him," he said. "Liv, tell me what happened."

She placed her hand against her pounding head. It seemed like days ago that all of this had happened. Her mind was foggy and she was trying hard to concentrate to put the events into place. "I was getting on the elevator. He must have followed me. He stepped in and the doors closed, I was trapped." She took another deep breath and fought back tears as she started to speak again. "I told him the baby wasn't his, but that only seemed to make things worse. He kissed me, I slapped him. Then he grabbed me by the hair and slammed me into the wall of the elevator. When he did I felt the pain in my stomach." She looked up at Elliot who seemed to be following her every word.

"How did you get away?" He asked.

"I told him I was in labor and needed to go to the hospital because it was too early. He stepped out to go get the car and I hit the button to move to the next floor. I tried to run, but the contractions kept getting closer and harder. I hid between an SUV and the wall. I just tried to focus on staying quiet so he wouldn't hear me, but the contractions kept coming harder. And there was so much blood." She paused for a second and just stared off thinking back to that moment. "I felt like I was going to pass out, everything around me went dark. I looked up, but all I could see was the shape of him standing over me. Another hard contraction came and I screamed through it. When I did, I put my foot against the tire of the SUV for leverage to try to fight it." She looked up and him with a smile of disbelief and shook her head. "The car alarm went off and he ran. I passed out. The security guard must have called the ambulance."

"Liv, I'm sorry. I knew it was taking you a while, I was sitting at the desk doing paperwork and you were there and needed me. I should have gotten up and went to check on you."

"Elliot there are five levels in that parking garage, you wouldn't have been able to find me. It all happened quickly or it seemed. In about ten minutes. Nick only knew where I was because he must have followed me in."

"We pulled the tapes from the security cameras. He got out of the garage. We got uniforms on his car and Munch and Fin are tracking him down. He didn't go home or to the hospital. And we are watching your apartment. We are going to find this guy."

She took a deep breath and sighed. "I just want to see my baby," she said softly.

Elliot kissed her forehead. Then stepped backward out of the room and called for a nurse. Before long a young dark haired woman was standing next to Olivia's hospital bed checking all of the tubes that were still taped to her arms.

"When can I see my baby?" Olivia asked the nurse.

"Well," the woman said. "I will have to ask your doctor." Then she was gone again.

"She was absolutely no help at all," Elliot said getting impatient. He knew all of the fears and terrible things that were flooding Olivia's mind and the only way to ease them was to let her see her son.

Ten minutes later her doctor entered the room.

"How are we feeling?" He asked her.

"A little sore, but I'm fine. I want to see my baby," Olivia said. It had now almost four hours since she had given birth and the child was rushed from the room.

"We'll get to that," the doctor replied sitting on the edge of her bed and shining a light into her eyes. "He is down the hall in the NICU right now and we are keeping him warm and trying to get some fluids into him."

"Is he okay?" She asked as the doctor listened to her heart beat. Elliot could feel his heart skip a beat. God please don't let this be bad news.

"He is doing well. But it will be a while before he is completely out of the woods. Premature babies have a rough time their first few weeks of life. He is tiny. But so far he is breathing on his own and his heart rate is good. We are having trouble keeping his body temperature up, so for now he is in an incubator. Olivia, what went on before you came here?" The doctor asked.

Olivia repeated the elevator story to the doctor.

"Well, you went into labor, because your placenta ruptured. If you hadn't gotten in here when you did you and this baby would have died."

"It must have happened when he pushed me into the elevator wall," she said as a tear rolled off her cheek.

The doctor squeezed her hand. "He is in good hands now. I need to examine you again, but I can hold off a little while for that. I'll get a wheel chair and take the two of you up to meet your son. Then I want to give you something to help you sleep, you need sleep right now. Your body is exhausted from delivery and losing all of that blood. You need to rest." Olivia nodded in agreement, what ever it took to see her baby.

Before long the doctor was pushing her wheel chair and leading them into the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU) where her baby was being held for the time being. The doctor introduced them to the doctor and nurses working the floor and left them with a nurse to show them to the baby.

She lead them to a quiet room full of incubators and tiny beds. "They ask that you not look at the other babies." She said to Olivia, who was looking around trying to figure out which one of these was her son.

In the corner of the room sat a rocking chair, similar to the one at home in her nursery. Beside the rocking chair laid a tiny baby in an incubator. Olivia's eyes filled with tears. There were tubes and machines connected all over him. She turned and buried her face into Elliot's shirt in disbelief. She gasped shallow breaths trying to regain control of herself. This baby needed her now more than ever. She felt Elliot's arms enclose around her, holding her tight. She was so glad he was the one here with her. She looked into his eyes as tears rolled down her cheeks.

"Are you okay?" He whispered. "We can wait. Do this a little later after you have had more time to rest."

Olivia took a deep breath. "I'll be okay," she replied letting go of Elliot and turning once more to look down at the baby. She had never seen a baby so small. He would have almost fit into the palm of her hand. She reached her fingers out and placed them on top of the incubator then leaned in to peer down at him. She felt Elliot's hand squeeze hers as she took a deep breath. "What is all of this?" She asked.

"Mostly just monitors. We have had a staff sitting one on one with him for the last few hours, just in case. The wire on his foot is a thermometer, it is hooked to this monitor so we don't have to disrupt him to check his body temperature. One of these into his leg is fluids and one is just in place so that if we need to give him injections we don't have to stick him again. He is breathing on his own, but this tube is pumping warmed oxygen into the incubator. It is easier for newborns to breathe warm air. And this sticky one on his chest, is the heart monitor. We're watching his rhythms just to be sure everything is okay. It is a little shocking to see for the first time. But I assure you he is resting comfortably. For right now that is the best thing he can do."

"Why are there bandages taped over his eyes?" Olivia asked.

The nurse smiled a warm smile. "When babies born this early, their eyelids are too thin to protect their little eyes from the light. We cover them, it also helps him to sleep more because it stays dark and warm inside the incubator like it is inside the mother's womb."

"He's so tiny," Olivia whispered as Elliot stood behind her with his arms around her looking down on the baby.

"Two pounds, eleven ounces. And he is fifteen and a half inches long," the nurse replied.

"He is beautiful," Elliot said looking down at him.

Olivia looked at Elliot and smiled.

"He's perfect, Liv." He said pressing his lips to hers.

"Would you guys like to touch him?" The nurse asked. "It is too soon for me to take him out and let you hold him, but I can let you touch him."

Olivia smiled and they both nodded through tears. It had been a while, Elliot thought since he had seen her cry happy tears. They had to scrub up with special soap and then rub their hands with alcohol gel. The nurse unlocked a small sliding door over an opening in the side of the incubator. The space was just large enough to fit your hands through. Olivia reached in slowly and touched the baby's skin with her fingertip. She moved her hand up to his little head and brushed back a small lock of dark hair and circled her fingertips through it. She ran her index finger down the bridge of his nose and touched his little chin. The baby stirred around a bit with her touch, but didn't cry. She placed her finger inside his tiny hand and he closed his hand around it. She never wanted him to let go. She smiled and looked back at Elliot.

"He is so soft," she said softly. She took Elliot by the hand and placed his fingertip on the baby's chest where they could his heart beating wildly. Elliot looked down at him in amazement. This baby made all of his look they were huge. Olivia ran her fingertip across his toes counting them in the back of her mind, ten. She stretched open his little fingers, they were long and slender like hers. Ten of those as well. Elliot looked her in the eyes and smiled, he knew what she was doing. He had seen Kathy perform this same instinctive motherly check on all of their newborns.

"Have you thought of a name yet?" The nurse asked pointing to the "It's a boy" tag taped to the outside of his incubator with the words "Baby Boy Benson" printed neatly on the name line. Olivia shook her head and her eyes dropped back down to the baby. The nurse came around and closed the little door locking it again and Elliot and Olivia stood there looking down over him as she turned to walk away.

Elliot placed a hand in the small of Olivia's back as he turned to look at the nurse.

"His name is Stabler," Elliot called to the nurse.

She walked behind the desk and returned with a new name tag and a pen.

"Are you sure?" She asked looking up at Olivia.

Liv turned to look at Elliot staring at the baby with love in his eyes. He couldn't have possibly have loved this child any less than she did.

"Yes," she said looking back at the nurse.

The nurse soon replaced the card with the new one. This time on the name line it read "Baby Boy Stabler."

Elliot ran his fingers over the words as he repeated them in his head. He stood behind Olivia and wrapped his arms tight around her kissing the side of her neck in adoration. "Thank you," he whispered softly in her ear.

She turned her big brown eyes to gaze into his. "For what?" she asked not sure what he was talking about.

"For sharing this with me," he replied. "There is no where else in the world I would rather be than right here with you and him.

Olivia laced her fingers in his and brought his fist to meet her lips. "Thank you," she said softly.

Elliot looked into her eyes and ran his thumb down the side of her tear stained cheek.

"For giving my son a father," She said as she took a staggered breath trying not to cry again.

"I want to give him everything," Elliot said. "I want to give you everything."

Olivia turned into him wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him. She placed her hands on his cheeks bringing his forehead to rest against hers and stared deep into his eyes. "You already have," she whispered softly as she kissed his lips.


	29. 29 The Love Of My Life

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Twenty Nine: The Love Of My Life)_

Elliot woke the next morning holding Olivia, laying beside her in her hospital bed. Even after medication she hadn't been able to sleep. He slid into the bed next to her to hold her, comfort her, just until she fell asleep. He must have drifted off with her. Elliot looked down as her sleeping in his arms. He wanted to get up, but didn't want to disturb her peaceful slumber. The two of them were crammed tightly into the tiny bed . Infact he thought, had the bed rail not been up on Olivia's side she probably would have fallen out during the night. He arched his back and it popped. That's a little better, he thought.

Somehow Elliot managed to roll out from under her, with out waking her. He positioned her head on the pillow and raised the blanket to cover, then kissed her on the forehead. Olivia must have been sleeping heavily due to the medication. When she was pregnant he would lay beside her and sleep at night, he couldn't even get up to use the bathroom without waking her. Elliot ran his hand over the top of her head, she was exhausted. He raised the bedrail on his side of the bed and headed down the hall toward the NICU.

"Hey," Elliot said to the nurse behind the desk. "Can I look in on him?"

"Sure," she said with a smile and lead Elliot back to the baby.

Elliot sat down in the rocking chair beside the incubator and just watched the little boy as his tiny chest rose and fell with each breath. "Hey little guy," he whispered as he leaned in close to the incubator. Elliot wished so badly that he could just hold the baby in his arms, cradle him and let him know everything was going to be okay. "Hang in there little man. I'll let you get you rest now. I'll come back to visit you later."

Elliot returned to Olivia's hospital room about an hour later to find her stirring, but not yet awake. He sat in the chair next to her bed and just watched over her, as if standing guard. Her heavy eyes opened and instantly located his across the room.

"Good morning Sleeping Beauty," he said with a smile.

"How long have you been awake?" She asked as she stretched and sat up in the bed.

"A couple of hours," he replied as he kissed her lips. "Long enough to hit the café around the corner and score us some breakfast. Belgian waffles with strawberries and whipped cream, bacon, scrambled eggs with cheese, caffeinated coffee and orange juice."

Olivia looked at the small table across the room. It had been set for two, complete with a white rose as a center piece. "Elliot, how did you pull this off?"

"Well, I had a little help from the nurse. She found the table and table cloth. I thought this would be better than hospital food." Elliot watched as a smile crossed her face. He loved this look on her. She was happy, for the first time in a long time. "I also went by your apartment and got some of your things." Elliot placed her overnight bag on the foot of the bed.

"It will be nice to get out of this hospital gown and get a shower."

"First things first," Elliot said pulling her bathrobe from the bag and placing it over her shoulders. "You my dear, need to eat something." Elliot took her by the hand and lead her to the chair he had pulled out for her.

"Wow El, this is a lot of food." She said smiling at him from across the table.

"I wasn't sure what you would be in the mood for, so I got a little of everything."

Later, the doctor came in to give them an update on the baby's condition. It didn't seem like much had changed, but at this point that was more good news than bad. He examined Olivia and suggested she start pumping breast milk for the nurses to feed to the baby. After a really uncomfortable first session with a breast pump Olivia was finally able to take a shower and put on some of her own clothes. She stood in front of the bathroom mirror and combed her hair. She ran her hands down over the top of her shirt noticing her now larger breasts and smaller belly. It was almost like she didn't even recognize her own body anymore. Olivia sighed and turned on her hair dryer.

Twenty minutes later she joined Elliot in the NICU to check on the baby. They sat together just looking at him, wanting so badly to hold him. Naming the baby was still one of the farthest things from her mind. She had to hold him first and look into his eyes, then she would be able to determine what kind of name fit him. But for now all she could do was sit and wait.

"Who would have thought," Olivia said looking down at the tiny baby, "that I would finally find the love of my life in a place like this."

Elliot smiled at her rubbing her shoulders in an attempt to ease some of the tension he found there. She soon found herself sitting on Elliot's lap resting her head on his shoulder staring into the incubator. Elliot's attention however focused mainly on the monitors. He watched as the lights blinked and beeps beeped, wishing he had some clue how to read any of them.

She took a deep breath and exhaled slowly trying to release some of the stress of not knowing what was going on with her child. Elliot felt he needed to talk to her, but had no idea what to say. He had no words that could make this situation better for her. All he could do was be there with her.

Around six o'clock that afternoon the nurse came into the NICU to let Elliot and Olivia know that they had visitors. Olivia's eyes fluttered open and realized that she had nodded off. "I'll go," she said softly standing up and kissing him. "You wait with him."

Olivia walked out into the waiting room. The entire gang was there with flowers and gifts for her and the baby. They all looked shocked and hadn't expected to see her up and going so quickly. They exchanged hugs and words of congratulations then helped Olivia carry the gifts to her hospital room. Fin and Munch were only able to stop by for a moment before having to rush off again. Liv walked Cragen and Casey back to the NICU to show them the baby.

"He is so beautiful," Casey said with a smile.

"You did good Liv," Cragen said patting her on the back.

The four of them talked for a little while and Olivia updated them on the baby's condition. It felt so good to have their friends there to support them. After a little while Casey had to leave as well, so Olivia walked her out.

"I am so happy for you," Casey said hugging Olivia.

"Thank you," Olivia replied. "Casey, there is something I need to talk to you about."

Casey turned to her with a worried look on her face. "Olivia, what's going on?"

"I have been thinking a lot lately, about everything in the world it seems. Casey, I want you to be my son's Godmother."

Casey stopped walking and looked at Olivia, she almost couldn't believe the words she was hearing.

"Say you will Casey," Olivia stared at Casey waiting for an answer.

"Of course I will, Liv. I'd be honored, but I need you to know that I don't know the first thing about babies."

"You know how to love him, that is all you need to know. You will figure the rest out. I just need this. I mean, with my job…. I never know if…. If anything should ever happen to me I need to know that he will be taken care of. I have thought about this for a long time Casey. And I discussed it with Elliot, decided after a lot of thought and consideration may I add, on you and Cragen." Olivia stood watching Casey waiting for a reaction.

Casey smiled and leaned in for another hug. "Thank you," she said softly.

"We made an appointment to have him baptized tomorrow morning. Not a big ceremony, but we would like you to be there."

"Of course," Casey squeezed Olivia's hand then got into the elevator and headed down to the parking garage.

Elliot stood talking to Cragen, both of them looking down at the sleeping baby.

"He looks like Liv," Cragen said.

"Yeah, he does." Elliot answered.

"Baby Boy Stabler?" Cragen asked. "Elliot, exactly how involved were you in this?" Cragen looked at Elliot as if staring down a guilty criminal waiting for him to break.

"He is my son," Elliot replied. "Our DNA doesn't match, but I love this kid more than I ever thought I could love anyone. I love her, too." Elliot said staring straight ahead.

"What is going on with the two of you?" Cragen asked.

"Nothing, yet. We are just close, really close. She knows I love her. Hell, someday I'd like to marry her. But Liv isn't ready for any of that right now. Right now, we have just decided to take things between us slow and to raise this baby together. She gave him my name, because I want him to be my son. And we want you to be his Godfather." Elliot looked at Cragen as he stared down at the tiny baby.

"You have talked to Liv about this?" He asked.

"It was her idea. You and Novak. I imagine Liv is talking to her about it right now. What do you think?"

"I think, I have the most beautiful Godson in the world. He needs a name, Elliot."

"Yeah, we're working on it." Elliot replied. "Listen, we are going to have the baby baptized tomorrow. Because they have to do it here, we can't really have a lot of people or a big ceremony. So we decided to invite just you and Casey for now. After he gets out of here, we'll have a party or something for everyone."

"I wouldn't miss it!" Cragen leaned down to look at the baby again. "Sleep tight little guy," he said through the thick plastic wall. "I'd better get back."

Olivia passed Cragen on her way back inside and he stopped to give her a hug then was on his way out.


	30. 30 Extended Family

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Thirty: Extended Family)_

The next morning Elliot and Olivia stood next to Cragen and Casey, looking down into the incubator where their son laid. The four of them watched as the tiny baby was baptized. They had hoped to be able to take him out and hold him for the first time, but he had started to have a little trouble breathing on his own and was unable to leave the incubator even for the ceremony. Instead, the preacher reached his hands through the little sliding door to touch the baby with Holy water. Elliot stood proud next to Olivia watching as their child was accepted into the Christian faith. This was important to Olivia. Elliot was not quite sure why. She had never seemed to be a religious person in the past. He knew she believed in God, but that was pretty much as far as it went for her. Elliot had been raised Catholic and though he didn't follow the guidelines of the church as closely as they would have liked him to, still considered himself Catholic. Olivia didn't want the baby raised Catholic, but wanted God in the boy's life. After hours of discussion the night the baby was born, this was what they had agreed on.

Later that afternoon Elliot and Olivia sat alone next to the incubator with their infant son. Elliot walked up behind her sitting in the rocking chair and placed his hand on her shoulder. Olivia looked up at him standing behind her.

"I'd like to bring the kids in to see the baby. If you don't mind," he said.

"I don't mind," she replied placing her hand on his.

Elliot knelt down beside her. "I think it's time they met their little brother."

Olivia turned to look at him, she had never really thought about that part. "Elliot, how are you going to explain this to them? How are you going to explain this to Kathy?"

"The great thing about filing for divorce is that I no longer have to care what Kathy thinks. And as far as the kids…. Maureen & Kathleen are adults now and plenty old enough to understand the situation. The twins probably be so excited they wont think about it much and Eli will just be glad to have another baby to play with."

"You know they are going to think there is something between us."

"Olivia," he said looking her in the eyes and placing his hand on the side of her face, "there is something between us."

"Well….yes, but it isn't what they are going to think it is. Elliot you are not even divorced yet!"

"Liv, do you realize that my girls have been trying to get me to ask you out since Kathy and I split up. My kids adore you! If you want we can sit down together and talk to them." Elliot felt a little embarrassed to admit this little detail he had neglected to mention over the last few months.

"I just don't want to be the other woman. I don't want them to think that something has been going on between us all along, because it hasn't. Kathy has been more than subtle with her accusations that you and I were sleeping together long before the two of you split up. I don't want everyone thinking that he is some dirty little secret or your love child from some whore you knocked up while you were still married to your wife!"

"Whoa, slow down a minute! First of all, no one thinks you are a whore and no one is going to think badly of him! I won't let them! Second of all, we can sit down with the kids and explain it all to them, together. Then bring them up to see the baby. Liv, it is going to be okay. I promise you." Elliot looked deep into her eyes and kissed her hand.

"I just don't want to cause problems for you. The divorce hasn't gone thru yet, if we piss her off with this she might try to keep your own kids from you." Olivia was really concerned, she knew what his children meant to him.

"Honey, you worry too much." He said then kissed her lips gently.

"Elliot, maybe this little family discussion should include Kathy."

Elliot stared into her eyes, she was absolutely right. He had really hoped to sever all ties with the woman, but seeing as she was the mother of five of his children that probably was not going to happen. Ignoring her would only make his life worse. If he ever hoped of having a healthy, happy relationship with Olivia they were going to have to develop some sort of third party relationship with Kathy as well. As long as they shared children, she would be in his life. The more pleasant the relationship they kept with her, the easier things would be on them and the children.

"I will call Kathy and ask her to meet us here with the kids. But I think we should go ahead and get it out of the way. I just want the kids to be able to come in and see him, know about him. I don't want to start any drama."

"Okay, Olivia replied handing him his cell phone."

That evening Kathy and all five kids met Elliot and Olivia in the cafeteria for a discussion. After breaking the news to everyone Elliot sat watching the faces around him trying to register some sort of reaction. Kathy however fixed her look on Olivia, who sat holding Elliot's hand tight under the table. Part of her felt afraid to look Kathy in the eye, even though she knew they had done nothing wrong.

"I should go," Kathy said handing Maureen the car keys. "I'll take a cab. You guys spend some time with your dad," she said then got up and walked toward the elevator.

After a few seconds Olivia looked at Elliot, then got up and walked out as well.

"Kathy," she said quietly as she approached the elevator. Kathy wouldn't look at her, she just pressed the button again. "Kathy, please talk to me. He didn't do anything wrong!"

"I trusted you Olivia," Kathy snarled at her as she glared into Olivia's eyes. "How long were you sleeping with my husband?"

"Kathy, I'm not sleeping with him. I have never slept with him!" Olivia tried to explain, but Kathy slapped her. Olivia stood still for a moment with her hand on her cheek, she had to somehow make this right. She placed her hands on Kathy's arms and backed her against the wall. Kathy glared at Olivia, but this time Liv wasn't budging. "Listen to me! The baby is not his! Elliot and I have never even had sex!"

"Do you think I didn't see it? All of those years, the way you looked at him? The way he looked at you? I was married to him for twenty years and he never once looked at me the way he looks at you!" The elevator door opened and Kathy stormed in, stood there for a second then stormed right back out pointing her finger at Olivia. "Do you have any idea what it is like to give everything you have to someone, to love someone with all of your heart and know the entire time that he doesn't love you the way you love him?" By now Kathy was crying and Olivia stood looking down quietly.

"Yes," she replied as her eyes rose to meet Kathy's and a tear rolled down her cheek. "Look, I am not going to lie to you and try to say that we have not been fighting off romantic feeling for years. But you have to believe me, he never cheated on you. Not with me, not with anyone. I don't know exactly what this thing between us was then, but we never acted on it. We were friends, that is it! He may have been curious about me, but we never even so much as kissed until after your divorce papers were filed! Elliot was completely in love with you! It killed him when you left him! You took his kids away and you walked out on him! You broke his heart. I didn't think he would ever recover. I was there for him, we have always been there for each other. I got pregnant by someone else. Someone who was abusive and tried to kill me and my baby. Elliot helped me to get away from him and back on my feet. We had both just had our hearts broken and were just trying to survive. Then we realized what had been there the entire time. Kathy we have not even really dated yet. But we want to. Elliot asked me to give the baby his name, he wanted this baby to be his son. And after everything he has done for me, I couldn't deny him that. We want to have a life together, to raise this baby together. And who knows, maybe further in the future even have more children together. But as of right now all we have done is kiss. I don't even know if this thing between us will work out, but I do know he will always be a very special person in my life. I have spent the last seven months just trying to keep my child alive, I have not had the time to sleep with your husband!" Olivia wiped a frustrated tear from her cheek and turned to walk away from Kathy. She had said all she had to say, if Kathy didn't want to believe her she just didn't care anymore!

"Olivia," Kathy said from behind her.

Olivia slowly turned around to face her.

"I believe you," Kathy said. "It just hurts, you know? Knowing that for the longest time he had this…this… crush or whatever on you. He spent most of his time with you. When he was hurt or upset or needed someone to comfort him, he didn't come to me, his wife, he turned to you. I am not going to pretend that the thought never crossed my mind, but I have never thought badly of you. Until today. And I was so wrong to judge you. Olivia, I'm sorry. And I'm sorry I hit you. But to hear him say that he is leaving me and going to you, I guess I kind of assumed, you know?"

"Kathy, he didn't leave you. You left him. You wanted out. And it killed him," Olivia said with a shaky voice.

"I know," Kathy replied. "I guess it just hurts to see that he has moved on so quickly. When you realize that you had something wonderful and you threw it away, now it is too late to get it back. I don't want him to hurt. I want him to be happy. But it still kind of hurts. I guess the tables have really turned, right?"

Olivia looked at her confused.

"I left him and broke his heart. And now seeing him happy with someone new is breaking mine."

"Look," Olivia said, "we want to keep an open relationship with you. It is very important to Elliot, to both of us to keep him as close to the kids as possible. There has to be some way we can work this out like adults. Some way to keep the kids out of the middle of things."

"Elliot and I have already worked out a custody agreement. I don't see why any of this has to change anything," Kathy replied.

Olivia smiled at her through tears. "Thank you," she replied.

"Olivia, do you love him?" Kathy asked.

"With all of my heart," Olivia answered.

"Good," Kathy replied. "He deserves to be loved, he is an amazing man."

"I know," Liv said wiping a tear from her cheek.

"He loves you Olivia. Don't hurt him like I did," Kathy said then she stepped into the elevator.

Olivia stood alone in the hall for a few minutes to gather herself before facing Elliot and the children. Once she had calmed herself and quit crying she stepped into the bathroom and splashed some water on her face to remove the tear stains then headed back to the table.

"Hey," Elliot said as she approached the group.

"Hey guys," she said.

"The kids have been suggesting names, for the baby." Elliot said looking in her eyes.

"Oh yeah?" She smiled looking over the group. They were all smiling in excitement. The children didn't seem to be worried about this unusual situation at all. "Would you guys like to go see him?" She asked with a nervous smile.

"Yeah," she heard squealed from five different voices.

"Listen guys, we can only go in a few at a time and we have to be really quiet so we don't disturb the other babies." Elliot looked up at Olivia and the two older girls. "Why don't I take Dickie, Elizabeth and Eli in for a few minutes. Then you can take the girls in."

"It's okay with me if it is okay with them," Olivia nodded in agreement.

"It's cool daddy," Maureen said.

"Okay, I will be back in a few minutes. You two behave yourselves," Elliot said kissing them both on the forehead.

"We will dad," Kathleen replied.

Elliot winked at Olivia, then took the younger kids back upstairs to see their new little brother.

Olivia took a deep breath then turned around to face the two older girls. They were going to be her challenge. Kathleen and Maureen stood looking at Olivia, quietly, not saying a word. This made her nervous, what were they thinking. They probably hated her now. They probably thought that she was the reason for their parents divor…

"Olivia," Kathleen spoke up.

"Yes," she answered nervously.

"Are you going to marry our dad?" The girl asked with a blank look on her face.

Liv, was speechless. She felt as if someone had just punched her in the stomach and she couldn't breathe. "I don't know," she mumbled trying to avoid a direct answer.

"If you do, that would make you our stepmother, right?" Kathleen continued.

"I guess it would, yes." Olivia replied.

"Cool," she said nodding her head.

"Really," Olivia said with a smile and a sigh of relief.

"Yeah," Maureen answered as her eyes lit up. "We have been trying to talk dad into asking you out for months. But he always had some excuse. Like you had a boyfriend or whatever. You guys would be so cute together."

Olivia was not quite sure what had just happened. "Guys, we are not really even dating."

"But you are going to right?" Maureen asked with a smile.

"You know he is in love with you right?" Kathleen added.

Okay, now she was on the right page. The kids were trying to set them up.

"Look, ladies…" Olivia stared at them unsure of what to really say, they weren't children anymore and they were going to figure this out weather they told them or not so she might as well be straight with them from the start. "I love your father and I know he loves me. Right now, with everything going on with the baby and everything we are just kind of being together. We haven't exactly had time to go out on a date, yet. But we fully intend to, just as soon as the baby is well and can go home."

"Really?" Maureen asked. "You know any time you guys need a baby sitter so you can have some time alone, you have my cell phone number."

Olivia laughed as Elliot returned in the room with the younger kids full of excitement from seeing the baby. He stared across the room looking into her eyes.

Olivia mouthed the words "I Love You" to him and he mouthed "I Love You, Too."

Maureen and Kathleen who had witnessed the silent gesture turned and smiled at each other. Then Olivia took them back to see the baby.


	31. 31 Three Days, Six Hours & Twenty Seven

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Thirty One: Three Days, Six Hours & Twenty Seven Minutes)_

Elliot and Olivia spent that sleepless night sitting next to the incubator, waiting for some good news. The baby had begun having trouble breathing on his own and had to be hooked up to a machine to help him breathe. It seemed like all of the progress he had made in the past two days was now starting to regress. His heart rate had begun to drop and the doctor and nurses were watching him closely. The tiny baby boy now had more tubes and wires connected to him than before and his mother and father were both terrified.

"Where is that doctor?" Elliot said looking down at his watch. "He was supposed to be here twenty minutes ago to give us an update!" He turned to look at Olivia, who actually appeared to be quite calm. She just stood admiring the infant and watching him sleep.

"El," she said softly turning to face him, "baby, they can't give us an update if they don't have one to give. He will tell us when they know something." Olivia took Elliot's hand and kissed him softly. Now it was her being strong that was holding him together.

"I just hate all of this waiting. I feel so helpless. I would give anything in the world to make him better, but there is nothing that I can do for him. This is killing me," he replied looking into the cool darkness of her eyes.

"I know," she said. "But we can't give up on him, not yet. I refuse to."

Elliot wrapped his arms tightly around her hugging her and holding her, again she was right.

"I'm glad we got the kids in here to see him before all of this started. All of these tubes and wires and monitors probably would have been too much for them. God Liv, it's almost too much for me."

Just then the doctor walked in. Finally, Elliot thought, but didn't say. The doctor walked over to the incubator and slid open the little door. He reached inside and adjusted some of the wires and tubes, then slid it shut again and walked away. Elliot just stood there, then turned to look at Olivia.

"Doctor, wait!" Elliot called to him, "we have been waiting all day for some kind of update. What is going on with our son?"

The doctor walked back over and looked at some of the monitors and pushed a few buttons. "His condition is getting worse," he answered Elliot in a shaky voice. "I'm really sorry. I have been on the phone for the last two hours tracking down specialists to try to get any idea of what to do to help him. His breathing is completely reliant on the machine now and his little heart is struggling to keep his little body going."

Olivia took a deep breath and felt the tears pouring down her face. She turned to look at her son. "What are his chances? I mean he could still make it right?"

"He could, but things don't look so good. When babies are born this early, every moment is a fight for them. His heart and lungs are underdeveloped, so they have to work much harder than those of a full term newborn. He was doing so well at first, I'm just not sure his little body is strong enough."

"You think my baby is going to die?" She asked the doctor in a panic.

He placed his hands on Olivia's arms and looked into her eyes. "We are going to do everything in our power to prevent that from happening. This baby is a fighter. For now, things could really go either way. We just don't know. We will just have to wait and watch. But I will let you know the second his condition improves or worsens."

Olivia looked at Elliot, now he was crying as well. She threw her arms around him and he held tight to her as they cried together.

The nurses brought in another rocking chair so they could both sit by his side. Elliot sat and watched her watch the baby. For hours there was nothing but silence in the room. Then all of a sudden the alarm on the baby's heart machine went off. A team of doctors and nurses rushed over to the incubator and crowded so tightly around it that Elliot and Olivia could no longer see the infant. Elliot stood with his arms around her and neither of them could even breathe. Olivia was crying and shaking so hard Elliot didn't know if she was going to be sick or pass out. He held her tight against his chest and felt his knees getting weak, as well.

"No, no, no, no…." Olivia cried as she buried her face into Elliot's shirt and gasped for air.

Then silence again, as the machine stopped and a nurse pushed the button to reset it. Olivia looked up as the crowd of people scattered through out the room checking on other patients. Now only their doctor stood next to the baby, who once again appeared to be resting comfortably.

"What the Hell was that?" Elliot asked the doctor with out letting go of Olivia.

"We should talk, privately." The doctor replied then lead them into a small meeting room where they could have the conversation.

Olivia couldn't speak at all, she knew this news was bad. She could feel it in the pit of her stomach. They would not have pulled them from the baby's side to give them good news. She now sat in a chair at a table watching Elliot pace the room as the doctor flipped through the baby's chart.

"What is going on?" Elliot demanded.

"Your son has a very serious condition, Mr. Stabler. As you already know he was born with an under developed heart and lungs due to his premature birth. His body is shutting down. We have done everything we can do, but his heart is too weak to keep him alive much longer."

"God no," Olivia gasped placing her hand over her mouth as tears once again poured down her face. She raised her knees to her chest and held them there and forcing herself to breathe.

"You are sure? What just happened in there?" Elliot asked.

"His heart stopped beating. It was only for a few moments, but it did more damage to his already weak little body."

"How long do we have?" Elliot asked the doctor as he reached down taking Olivia's hand into his and she turned to look at him.

"Probably no more than forty eight hours. I am so sorry. There is nothing else we can do for him."

The doctor left the conference room and Elliot and Olivia sat there for a moment trying to process everything that had just happened. A few minutes later they returned to the NICU where they rejoined their son. For the next few hours they sat and watched him laying there looking so peaceful. Olivia, didn't say anything. But focused her attention to watching each breath the baby took, refusing to breathe until he did. She sat quietly crying and just staring at the baby. It was as if every dream she had, had come true just long enough to be ripped out from under her.

Elliot stood across the room against the wall watching her watch the baby. He felt horrible, knowing there was nothing he could do to make this better. He stood there quietly for about twenty minutes then stormed toward the desk where the nurse sat.

"Can I help you, sir?" The nurse asked from behind the desk as Elliot approached.

"Yes, we want to hold our son!" Elliot almost shouted at her.

"Sir, I cannot allow that right now. His condition is too unstable. If we take him out of there…."

"Look Lady," Elliot demanded, "that doctor just came out and told us that there is no chance of this baby surviving the next forty eight hours!" Elliot turned to look at Olivia, "Let her hold her son." He watched as the woman got up and walked out of the room. Elliot stood there for a few minutes, but she didn't return.

Elliot walked slowly back over to Olivia, who raised her head to look up at him. He knelt down beside her taking her hands in his and wrapping his arms around her. "I am so sorry," he said.

Olivia raised his head to look at him. She shook her head still in disbelief and looked into his tear filled eyes. "There was nothing you could have done. He was just born too early. God Elliot," she buried her face into his chest and they both broke down crying.

About ten minutes later the doctor walked over to where they sat. He pulled a privacy curtain shut around the incubator and unlocked the lid. He then opened the top as he pushed the buttons to mute the monitors and removed several of the wires that were taped to the infant. Then removed the bandages that had been taped over his eyes. He wrapped the baby tight in a soft blue blanket then turned and handed him to Olivia, who was still sitting in the rocking chair.

Olivia took her son into her arms for the first time since his birth three days earlier. He still had a small tube they placed inside his nose to help him breathe. She lifted the infant and placed his tiny head against her collarbone and she hugged him. Elliot watched her cradle the baby and it broke his heart to know that this very well may be the first and last time she would ever get to hold him. Olivia held the baby in one arm as she pushed the blanket gently back from his face to get a better look at him. The baby opened his eyes and stared up at her.

Elliot smiled at her through tears, "he has your eyes."

Olivia sighed heavily and kissed her son on the top of his head, then turned to Elliot. "Do you want to hold your son?" She whispered trying hard not to break down.

Elliot opened his arms and she passed the baby to him. He looked down at the baby as he yawned and stretched in Elliot's arms. "He is so beautiful," Elliot said as tears rolled from his cheeks. Olivia leaned in and kissed his lips then placed her forehead against his looking into his eyes with the infant between them. "I love you both so much," he whispered to her as she smiled through tears.

The baby started to move around a little and began to cry. His tiny cries were so soft they where almost hard to hear. Elliot handed the baby back to his mother and she placed him against her chest and rocked him. He opened his little hands to touch the skin of her neck as she pressed him to her chest.

"He's hungry," the nurse said. "Would you like to feed him?" And handed Olivia a tiny bottle of breast milk. Olivia turned the baby and placed the nipple of the tiny bottle to his mouth. Before long the baby was finished nursing from the bottle and resting in his mothers arms. Olivia stared at the child never wanting to let go of him.

Elliot leaned in and kissed her lips tenderly. "Thank you," she whispered looking lovingly into his eyes. "I know you had to talk them into this," she said softly. Elliot laced his fingers between hers and kissed the baby on the top of the head.

Olivia closed her eyes. And before long had drifted off to sleep with the infant in her arms.

An hour later she opened her eyes to see the doctor standing over her holding a stethoscope against the baby's back. She looked at him as he shook his head and tears filled her eyes once more. The baby was gone. He had taken his last breaths peacefully in his mothers arms.

Olivia looked down at the baby in her arms. "I don't want to let him go," she said looking at Elliot through tears.

"We have to Liv," he said as he placed his hand against the side of her face and kissed her forehead.

A few hours later Elliot walked into the hospital room and sat down beside Olivia on the bed. "I made all of the calls," he said looking down at the floor.

Olivia started to breathe heavily and tears flooded her eyes. "I can't believe he is gone," she whispered.

"I know baby," Elliot replied. "The doctor thinks you should stay here tonight, he's worried about you."

"I'm fine, Elliot. I just lost my baby, how am I supposed to react?"

"I know that, they just want to make sure everything is okay after the delivery and maybe give you something to help you deal with this."

Olivia looked up at him, "what are they going to give me Elliot? The only thing that could possibly help me to deal with this is if they could some home give me my son back! But they can't, no one can! He's gone!"

"I know, honey. The doctor wants to keep you here overnight, just to make sure that you are okay. Liv, he is worried about you and just wants to keep you overnight for observation. Look, I will stay here with you. I'm not going to leave you alone. Liv, he is just trying to do his job."

"Fine," she said softly as she got up and walked down the hallway.

Elliot gave her a few minutes alone to just breathe and let things sink in, then went looking for her. He knew she wouldn't hurt herself or anything, but he worried about her anyway, he couldn't help it. He found her down the hall leaning against the wall staring into the nursery window at all of the other newborns.

"It isn't fair," she said softly as he approached her placing his arm around her.

"I know," he said placing a kiss on the top of her head.

"This one here, his mother is sixteen years old. She is still a child and she has a baby. A big, beautiful, healthy baby." Olivia started to break down. "I did everything I could, I did everything right. I ate healthy, got plenty of exercise, took the vitamins and I lost him. I still lost him, Elliot. I would have given my life for that baby. I would have done anything for him, but it still wasn't enough. He never had a chance." Olivia turned and looked at the clock on the wall. "Three days, six hours and twenty seven minutes. He lived his entire life in three days, six hours and twenty seven minutes. And then, as quickly as he came into this world, he was gone again. He never had a chance to live."

Elliot wrapped his arms tight around her and just held her letting her break down, she needed that now. She needed to just let it all out. After a few minutes he picked her up and carried her back to the hospital bed and laid her in it. She soon fell into a deep sleep as he watched over her.

Olivia was discharged the next morning. Elliot packed her bag while she wondered around the hospital still trying to make sense of the last four days. He found her standing beside the empty incubator that once held their son.

"Liv, honey, it's time to go now." He said standing beside her. "They want to know if you want to have some kind of service," he said trying not to allow his voice to crack.

Olivia could hear the pain in his voice as he asked her this question. "I don't think so," she said softly turning to look at him. "I don't want a big deal. Just close friends and the kids. I just can't do this right now," she said wiping a tear from under her eye.

She stared into the empty plastic box and tried to remember the way her son looked laying there.

"Liv," Elliot said placing his hand on the small of her back. She jumped a little and turned to look at him. "Lets go home," he said softly kissing her cheek. And she followed him to the elevator. When they got into the car Elliot placed his hand on her shoulder. Taking a deep breath, Olivia turned to look at him. "I think you should stay at my place for a while. Let me take down the nursery, before you go back home. I can pack everything up and store it until you are ready to go through it all."

"I want to go home, Elliot. I need this. I need to feel this, as much as it hurts. I appreciate you trying to shield me from pain and protect me, but I need to be able to hurt. I don't think I could survive this any other way."

Elliot drove her to her own apartment and unlocked the door as they carried her bags and gifts inside. She stood in the living room looking down the hallway at the closed nursery door. Elliot started to walk toward her bedroom to put her things away.

"Just leave them there," she said. And he sat the bags in the living room floor.

"Do you want me to fix you something to eat?" He asked.

"Elliot," she said turning to look him in the eye. "I appreciate everything you have done for me, but I think I just need to be alone for a while."

Elliot stood looking at her with her arms crossed in front of her as she looked at the nursery door. He knew she was going to break down when she went inside.

"Are you sure?" He asked her.

Olivia leaned in and hugged him tight. She wrapped her arms around him and kissed him on the lips. "Yeah, I'm sure. I just need a little time to let this all register." He could hear her voice crack as she spoke. She looked into his eyes again. "I love you," she whispered as she hugged him tight and kissed him once more. "And I will call you later."

"Okay," he replied. He wanted to do whatever it took to make this easier on her. Whatever she needed to get her through this, he was going to make sure she had. "I love you, too. If you change your mind or just want someone to talk to I am just a phone call away." Elliot kissed her lips and headed back to his apartment. It killed him to leave her alone, knowing how much pain she was in right now. But it was what she wanted.

Elliot didn't hear from her all the next day. He tried to call her but she had shut her phone off. He ordered a pizza and went by to check on her. The apartment was still when he arrived. Her bag and things still sat in the living room floor where he had set them the night before. Elliot walked down the hallway to find the door to the nursery standing open. He stood in the doorway and looked in at her sleeping in the rocking chair. In her arms was a big brown teddy bear he had bought for the baby at the hospital the night he was born. And beside her on the table was the sonogram picture from the day they learned she was having a boy. He could tell by the tear stains on her face that she had cried herself to sleep.

She stirred a little and raised her head as he slid his arms under her and raised her from the chair carrying her down the hallway to her bed and laying her down again. She looked into his eyes and kissed him.

"You scared me," he said kissing her lips.

"I'm sorry. People kept calling, I wasn't ready to talk to them about any of this so I turned the phone off. I must have fallen asleep in the chair."

Elliot kissed her forehead. "Are you hungry? I brought pizza."

She smiled at him placing her hand on his chest.

"I have an idea," he said, "why don't I go get some plates and napkins while you find us an old black and white movie on television. We will just lay around together and eat pizza all night until we pass out."

"That sounds good," she whispered kissing him again.

Before long Elliot found himself holding her tight in his arms as they both drifted off to sleep for the night.


	32. 32 Rebound

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Thirty Two: Rebound)_

The next few weeks were hard on them both. Olivia was supposed to take six weeks off to heal before returning to work. But after the first three she started hanging around work more and more finding excuses to come in. Cragen wouldn't allow her to fully return, but eventually started giving her paperwork and things to do around the station to keep her busy. She just couldn't handle the silence in the apartment or being alone anymore, she needed to be back with her friends, back with her family, where she belonged.

Olivia started working out again. She got up early every morning and went running and then to the gym. She quickly got lost the weight she had gained during pregnancy and was in better shape than ever.

She asked Elliot to help her pack up all of the things from the nursery and store them. Leaving out only the sonogram picture and the teddy bear, which she now kept in her room. Olivia also painted blue over the top of the clouds she had painted on the nursery walls. She was trying to make a new life for herself and there was no way for her to move forward as long as this room was holding her back. She missed the baby more than anything and would never forget him, but she couldn't allow herself to just sit around and cry anymore. She had to stand up and gain control of her life again.

Elliot and Olivia had continued spending time together. Being close, but not too close. Olivia knew that she was in love with him. But part of her was almost afraid to love him because it seemed like she was losing everything that she loved in her life. She had decided to take things slowly and not rush this relationship with him. They never really spoke about it, but Elliot must have felt the same way because he hadn't really made any moves on her either.

Olivia was comfortable with them like this for now. There was no pressure, no rush and this freedom gave their relationship a new innocence that had been missing from all she had before. He knew her, all of her. All of her dark secrets and the demons that lurked in the shadows of her mind and yet he still loved her and wanted to be with her. Part of her was curious why he still wanted to be with her, when most men would have already taken off. But he did and she wanted to be with him as well. She had never felt love like his and never wanted to again. Ever. With anyone else. She wanted more than anything for him to be the one.

Elliot returned from being out with Munch running down leads. He walked up to his desk and sat down in the office chair looking across the desk at Olivia. He smiled his sexy smile at her, the one that always made her heart skip a beat. Then he sighed and folded his hands behind his head. Liv sat quietly watching him, but trying not to let him know she was watching him. He rolled his sleeves half way up his forearms, grabbed a pen and began to write down notes on one of the files. Olivia placed her hand under her chin as she got distracted by him and began biting the cap to her pen. She stared quietly for a few moments until she heard Fin's voice behind her, then she jumped half startled. She must have zoned out.

"Earth to Olivia," Fin said.

"Yeah," she said turning to look at him pretending to be up on the conversation he had been carrying on with out her.

"Yeah what?" He asked with a confused look on his face.

"What?" She asked looking at him.

"I asked you to pass me that file on Elliot's desk," Fin reached his hand out and pointed to the file.

"Sure," she said handing it to him. She turned back around to look at Elliot, who was now looking her in the eyes and smiling. She had gotten caught. They both chuckled for a minute then it was back to work.

After work Olivia was walking out to her car as Elliot approached her in the parking lot.

"Liv," he called to her as he hurried to catch up to her.

"Yeah," she said turning around and walking backward as she spoke with him.

"Look, I was thinking…. Maybe, I mean if you wanted to…." Elliot stopped talking, distracted as she raised her eyes to gaze into his.

"If I wanted to…." she said with a smile.

He felt as if they were starting all over again. He was comfortable with her, but they had never dated, so in a sense this was all new to him. It had been over twenty years since he had actually asked a woman out on a real date. He looked into her eyes as she stood waiting for him to finish what he had started.

"I thought I could take you out sometime. Like a real date. Dinner or something. I know we are kind of doing this all out of order, but I really want to see you."

"Okay," she said. She just stood there waiting for him to make all of the moves, she wasn't making this any easier on him.

"Okay," he echoed. "What about dinner, tonight?"

Olivia smiled at him. It was so adorable that he was nervous, like she would actually turn him down. The truth is she would have gone anywhere with him to do anything as long as she could be with him, close to him, she didn't care where he took her. "Okay," she answered.

"I will pick you up around seven?" he asked nervously.

She wanted to throw herself into his arms and hug him for finally asking her. But at the same time she thought that this new start so to speak may be good for them. They needed a chance to find stable ground as a couple, maybe this was it. She nodded her head as he nervously leaned in and kissed her cheek. "I will see you then," she said.

At seven o'clock Olivia heard a knock on her apartment door. She laughed as she went to answer it, Elliot never knocked, he had a key. She opened the door and their eyes met, they both smiled and he leaned in and kissed her cheek. In his hand was a large bouquet of the most beautiful white roses she had ever seen.

"Elliot, these are beautiful," she gasped as he entered the apartment. For someone who hadn't dated in over twenty years, he wasn't off to a bad start.

"They reminded me of you," he said handing them to her and giving her a shy smile.

"Thank you," she replied softly hugging him. "I'd better put them in some water." She walked toward the kitchen and took out a vase from under the sink filling it with water and placing it on the counter. "White roses are my favorite," she said smiling at him.

"I know," he replied.

Olivia just looked at him. "How do you know?" She asked.

"Liv," he said standing across the counter from her and placing his hand on hers, "you learn a lot about a person in ten years."

"Well, what else do you know?" She asked amazed that he took the time to remember something like her favorite flower.

"Everything," he said confidently.

"Everything?" She laughed.

"Well, the important things." He looked into her eyes. "Your favorite color is green, favorite season is fall. You are ambidextrous. Confident, but a little unsure of yourself. You like sushi, but hate Japanese food. Favorite ice cream is vanilla, pepperoni & extra cheese pizza, vodka martini straight up two olives. You sleep on the left side of the bed, smile when I watch you sleep and when you are really tired," he stopped to look at her, "you snore."

"I do not!" She insisted.

"Yeah, you do. But I think it is adorable."

Olivia wanted to cry, this was the sweetest thing she had ever heard from a guy. None of her ex-boyfriends would have remembered one of those things about her and yet somehow he knew all of them. "I guess you really do know everything."

Elliot smiled and put his arm around her. "Are you hungry?"

"Yes," she answered.

"Shall we," he said as he motioned toward the door.

At the restaurant they sat looking at each other across a candle lit table. It was a tiny place they didn't visit often, but it was one of Olivia's favorites and that is why he chose it. There was a pianist this particular evening and between the wine, candles, music and the company it was incredibly romantic.

After dinner and their third glass of wine Elliot looked across the table at Olivia and took her hand in his. "Dance with me," he said.

"Elliot, there is no dance floor. I don't really think you are supposed to dance," she replied looking around them.

"I don't care," he replied now standing in front of her holding her hand. He brought her to her feet and pulled her in close to him.

"El…" she started to hesitate, but the way he held her felt so good.

"Shhhh," he said bringing his finger to her lips and looking into her eyes, "just let yourself feel the music." He was holding her so close and so tight, she didn't want him to let go. She closed her eyes for a moment and laid her head against his shoulder.

He closed his arms around her tight as the moved slowly to the music. She had never been held like this before. There was no space between them. She was closer to him now, than she had ever been to anyone in her whole life. She could feel her heart pounding in her chest in excitement. It was too late to turn back now, she thought, she had already fallen completely in love with him.

Olivia opened her eyes and gently kissed his lips as he ran his strong hands over her back with out loosening his grip on her. She took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. She was so wrapped up in the moment she had to remind herself to breathe. Elliot moved his hands slowly down her body over her clothes, feeling curves he had only touched for moments before. She stared deep into his soul and could feel him in the depths of hers as well. Elliot placed his hands around her slender waist and pulled her tighter to him until she could feel her pelvic bone against his. He could feel the warm skin of her lower back under his fingers as he moved them slowly in circles there wanting to go further. Elliot kissed her passionately. She had waited her entire life for kisses like his. Strong and passionate, with the perfect combination of lust and romance.

"Elliot," she whispered as she smiled and rolled her eyes while he kissed her collarbone. He ran his fingers slowly across her shoulder under the spaghetti strap of the red dress she wore. She looked into his eyes. "We should go," she whispered.

Elliot gathered their belongings from the table and they got a cab.

Back at Olivia's apartment they kissed passionately and explored each other with their hands. Elliot had now slid down both of the dress straps from her shoulders kissing them and running his fingers over them and her back. Olivia had removed his tie and unbuttoned half of his shirt kissing his bare chest and running her fingers over it. Elliot reached up and pulled the clip out of her hair allowing it to fall wildly around her face. He looked down at her under him as he ran his thumb over her cheek and she kissed it. They had been here once before. Elliot leaned in to kiss her lips and the phone rang. He ignored it for a moment and continued kissing her. Olivia broke their embrace and looked into his eyes.

"You should answer that," she said softly. "It could be important."

"Nothing is more important right now," he said kissing her neck.

"Elliot, they will just keep calling."

He knew she was right. Elliot opened his phone and placed it to his ear.

"Hello," he said watching her eyes sparkle.

Olivia could hear a voice on the other line, but wasn't quite sure what was going on. "It's Fin," Elliot whispered to her. "Actually Fin, Olivia is here with me," he said into the phone and Olivia gave him a look of shock. "Yeah, we were, uh going over some notes on the case." She smiled at his lame excuse as Elliot winked at her. "Let me talk to her and I will call you back, okay." Elliot hung up the phone and lowered himself back to her, kissing her once more.

"What is going on?" She asked.

"Well, they all wanted to know if we wanted to join them all for drinks."

"What do you want to do?" She asked.

Elliot just laughed a mischievous laugh and buried his face into her collarbone placing tiny kissed there until she laughed.

"Do you want to go?" She asked raising his face to look into his eyes.

He could tell this was her way of asking him to slow down so he took the hint.

"Sure, if you want to."

She took a deep breath and smiled. He would do anything in the world to see that smile.

"Let me go change," she whispered as she kissed him.


	33. 33 Intoxicated

**Immediate Danger**

**(Chapter Thirty Three: Intoxicated)**

_**They all sat around the table in their usual fashion, laughing and joking and just having a good time being together. Work was so much sometimes that they all needed these nights as a release for all of the stress and fears and bad things that followed them home every night. This also allowed them to be around each other without the rules and guidelines set by the restrictions of the work place. Here they could be themselves. And just be friends, nothing more. During this time, they didn't have to be co-workers or partners or even think about work if they didn't choose to do so. They just got to unwind together and have a good time. **_

_**This particular night Olivia found herself unwinding on a bar stool sitting between Elliot and Casey, as they all did shots of tequila with Fin. Four shots down the bar, gone in seconds before the bartender had even had the chance to set them up again. They didn't always drink like this, but this had been a particularly rough week at work and they had managed to close a case that had been cold for over ten years. Not to mention the bottom of an empty shot glass seemed to be the perfect place for Olivia to hide from everything that had cluttered her mind lately. She didn't exactly want to forget anything that had happened to her recently, she just wanted to move it all to the back of her mind for a little while and be able to focus on something else. Jose Quervo, was the perfect distraction. **_

_**Five shots and three beers down, Olivia was starting to feel invincible. She was actually proud of the fact that she didn't really even seem to be affected by the alcohol she had consumed in such a small amount of time, she barely even had a buzz. Until she stood up, that is. As Liv raised herself from the barstool to return to the table she staggered and stumbled almost falling to the floor. As she lost her balance and stumbled backward, Elliot stepped in behind her and caught her bringing her back to her feet.**_

"_**I think maybe you aught to slow down," he whispered into her ear. **_

_**She could feel the warmth of his breath on the side of her face and laughed as his words tickle her ear. It took everything she had in her not to spin around and lock her lips to his right there in front of everyone. Instead she glanced over her shoulder shooting him a shy look and bit her bottom lip wondering if he could read her thoughts. If so, she was in trouble. **_

"_**It has been so long since I have actually drank, I think maybe I don't have the tolerance I used to." **_

_**Elliot walked behind her to the table with his hand on the small of her back, partially for stability and partially just for an excuse to be touching her. **_

"_**Thank you," she said with a smile as he pulled out her chair for her. **_

"_**You are welcome," he replied returning the smile. **_

_**They stared at each other for a few moments across the table before they caught themselves and both turned their heads afraid of being caught. Olivia sat quietly listening to the voices echo from the table around her, laughing when they all laughed even though she was not even sure what the conversation was about. Elliot was the only thing on her mind. She waited until she could feel her buzz wearing off, then ordered another beer. **_

_**A few hours later she and Elliot poured themselves into the backseat of a cab headed toward her apartment. The ride there was quiet and they hardly looked at each other. She sat staring out the window trying to focus on any one thing as the world seemed to fly past them and he tried hard to control his thoughts and keep his mind from wondering into the forbidden places it had been in all day. **_

_**As they arrived at Olivia's building, Elliot paid the cab driver as she fumbled with her keys and tried to get the door open. Elliot walked in front of her up the steps to her floor holding her leading her by the hand. By now Olivia had sobered up for the most part. Elliot took the keys from her hand opening the apartment door. He stepped through the door, placing her keys on the coffee table near the lamp. Once inside, Olivia pushed the door shut behind her then turned to lean against it and stared at Elliot until she caught his eye. Finally he looked up at her, studying the expression on her face carefully and smiling at her. Olivia reached out to him grabbing his tie and twisting it in her hand as she pulled his lips to hers.**_

_**They kissed passionately as he pinned her body against the apartment door with his. He ran his hands up under her blouse caressing her breasts above her black lace bra. Olivia pulled at his shirt until she had untucked it from his pants, then ran her hands under it gliding her fingers over each and every line of his muscular chest. She arched her back as he let his fingers explore every inch of her back. **_

_**Elliot picked her up and carried her to the back of the apartment to the bedroom. He laid her gently on the bed kissing her slowly and unbuttoning her blouse as he stared into her eyes. He unzipped Olivia's jeans and slid them off her body dropping them to the floor. Elliot moved his hands up her thighs and across her flat stomach. He felt Olivia reach to undo his belt and slide it out of his pants. She pushed his shirt off his shoulders and unbuttoned his pants as he positioned himself over her. They kissed and touched and explored each other's body as step by step the came closer and closer to what they had both wanted for so long. **_

_**Elliot kissed her lips and ran his hands back down her body until he reached the black lace panties that matched her bra. There he stopped for a moment running his hands along the top of them allowing his fingers to dip slightly below the waistline. This sent chills up Olivia's spine and he felt her shiver with excitement underneath him. Elliot placed his hand against her calf muscle and glided it slowly up to her thigh. There he slid his fingers under the lace material of her panties continuing upward all the way to her hip and began to slide them down.**_

"_**Elliot wait," she gasped through a kiss bringing her hand down to rest on his. She gazed into his eyes with a look like she had just remembered something long forgotten. **_

"_**What, baby?" He replied kissing her neck.**_

"_**El…. I can't," she said placing her hands on the sides of his face to get his attention.**_

"_**Wait, what?" He asked hoping he was not really hearing her say this.**_

_**Olivia sat up running her fingers through her hair as she stared down at the pile of clothes in the floor. She took a deep breath and exhaled. "I want to," she said softly.**_

"_**So do I," he said staring deep into her soul through those beautiful brown eyes.**_

"_**Elliot, it's too soon. I'm sorry, I got carried away."**_

"_**Too soon?" He asked. He laid back in the bed as she pulled the sheet up over her half naked body and laid down beside him. She turned on her side to look at him. **_

"_**Elliot, I just had a baby."**_

_**For a few moments, they had both let this little detail slip from their minds. Elliot knew this, he should have thought about this, how could he forget? After having five children with Kathy he knew all too well that a woman isn't supposed to have sex until six weeks after child birth. **_

_**Elliot was a little frustrated, but he couldn't be angry with her. He could never be angry with her, not for long anyway. Elliot rolled over and put his arm around her gazing into her eyes.**_

"_**I'm so sorry, Elliot. I shouldn't have let it go this far," she said reaching into the floor to pick up her clothes.**_

"_**It's okay," he answered pulling her back in against him. "We have waited this long, we can wait a few more weeks." Elliot kissed her shoulder and wrapped his arm around her.**_

"_**I really feel bad about this." She rolled over on top of him and placing sift kisses down his chest. "You know," she said looking at him seductively as she kissed a ticklish place just below his navel, "there are other**_** things we could do." As she moved further down, Elliot raised her chin until their eyes met. **

"**Liv," he said quietly as he caressed the side of her face with his thumb, "I don't want us to be like that. At least, not yet." He placed his hands on her arms and guided her back into his arms. "I love you," he whispered placing a soft kiss against her lips.**

"**I love you, too." She whispered laying her head against his chest. "I just figured you were probably getting pretty tired of waiting."**

"**Olivia, I would wait forever or you." He tightened his arms around her and kissed her forehead. "Lets get some rest." **

**And with that they fell asleep in each others arms. **


	34. 34 Facing Demons

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Thirty Four: Facing Demons)_

The next couple of weeks were strange between them and didn't quite pass as quickly as they had both hoped they would. Olivia was almost afraid to be alone with him, she felt like she was teasing him, tempting him with something she was unable to give to him. But Elliot tried to keep them close. He would take advantage of every second he could get her alone and counted the days until he could finally make her his.

For now Olivia sat quietly at her desk reading from her computer screen as Elliot sat across from her desperately trying to get her attention. Just then a delivery man walked into the room with a dozen red roses in a vase.

"I have a delivery for Olivia Benson," the man called out across the room.

Olivia stood up confused. "I'm Olivia Benson," she answered.

"Here you go ma'am," he said handing her the flowers.

For a moment she felt excitement rise from the pit of her stomach as she turned to sit them down on her desk. She leaned in to smell the flowers as she shifted her eyes up to look at Elliot.

"Thank you," she mouthed silently. But Elliot shook his head. Olivia looked even more confused as she reached down and plucked the card from the bouquet to open it.

"Look up," was all it said. Olivia was almost afraid to. She shifted her eyes once more to look at Elliot who was watching her reaction cautiously. Then she looked out into the hallway. There stood Nick. She jumped knocking the vase off the desk sending it crashing to the floor shattering into a hundred pieces. The roses and water spilled all over the floor. Fin saw the fear in her eyes and quickly moved in behind her for support. They had been looking for this guy for a couple of weeks to bring him in and now here he stood.

Olivia stood still for a second just staring at him unable to even breathe. Elliot watched her as she started to walk toward Nick.

Fin moved in next to Elliot, "this guy can't possibly be this stupid! We been looking for him for weeks, he's got to know we have a warrant out on him. You want me to grab him?"

"No," Elliot replied raising his hand to stop Fin from moving in on Nick. "She needs this," he said softly and Fin could tell it pained him to stand back and watch Nick with her. "She knows we're here. If she needs us, she'll let us know." Elliot didn't take his eyes off her for a second. He watched every move she made, every tilt of her head and movement of her body waiting for a sign that she wanted him to move in and make the arrest.

Fin however was eyeing Nick and wouldn't even blink. He was like a pit bull awaiting command. He had been itching to take Nick down and punish him for hurting Olivia. Nick didn't know it yet, but he'd better hope that Elliot was the one to put the cuffs on him instead of Fin. Elliot would at least hold back a little in respect for Olivia. Fin was mad enough to kill him.

The two of them sat and watched unable to hear a word as Olivia and Nick were obviously arguing. Elliot felt Fin's hand on the bend of his arm for support when they realized that she was crying. But they didn't budge. Fin knew it was taking everything Elliot had inside him not to bust down the door and kill the man right there for hurting her the way he did. But this was what was best for Olivia.

Elliot almost jumped and took off across the floor when Nick reached out to put his arm around her, instead he just watched as Olivia pushed Nick away from her and turned to walk back to the desk. Nick grabbed her arm and spun her around kissing her and Elliot felt a small piece of his heart break.

Olivia drew a deep breath and closed her eyes. She turned to walk away from Nick and then spun back around and slammed him up against the wall. She was losing it, Elliot had seen this before. He watched carefully as tears poured from her eyes and she shouted at Nick. She pointed at him then pounded her fists into his chest. He reached his arm out to comfort her but she slapped him cold across the face. She had enough and wasn't taking it anymore. Elliot knew how hard this was for her, but he was proud of her for finally standing up to him. Nick no longer had any control over her.

Nick turned around and pushed her off of him and up against the wall then slapped her. With this Fin and Elliot walked toward the hallway to assist her. Nick turned to walk out of the precinct.

"Nick Parker," they heard Olivia call from behind him as Nick stopped in his place. "You are under arrest for assaulting a police officer and second degree murder." She walked up behind Nick as he turned around to face her. She stared into his eyes and Elliot watched her tears begin to fall once more. "You have the right to remain silent," she said as she slapped a cuff around Nicks wrist. Nick turned to walk away but Olivia hit him hard in the back of his head with her elbow knocking him to the floor. "Anything you say…" she continued placing the second cuff around his other wrist and rolling him over to look at him "can and will be used against you in a court of law."

Fin and Elliot stood watching her read him his rights as she flipped him back over and put her knee in his back pressing him to the floor. When she was finished Fin grabbed Nick and pulled him to his feet as Elliot reached to help Olivia up, her lip was bleeding again from where he had hit her.

"And that," Fin shouted at Nick turning him to look at her busted lip, "I'm gonna call resisting arrest. You're in a lot of trouble asshole!" Fin jerked him around and shoved him toward the booking department, painfully tightening the cuffs as they walked.

Olivia stood with tears on her face just watching as Fin let Nick out of the room.

"You did good," Elliot said raising his hand to her cheek for comfort. Olivia turned her eyes to look at him still trying to process what had just taken place. She fell into Elliot's open arms and he hugged her tight. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," she answered with a sigh. "I'm just glad it is finally over."

"He's not getting out this time," Elliot replied. "Casey has enough to make it stick. You added the second degree murder charge, he'll get seven to ten years for that one alone."

Elliot could feel her tears starting to soak through his shirt, but refused to let her go.

"He asked to see the baby," she sighed without looking at him. "I told him there was no baby. He didn't understand. I told him that the baby died because he slammed me into the elevator wall. He said it was probably for the best. How could that possibly be for the best?"

She now looked up at Elliot for an answer he knew he didn't have.

Elliot took a deep breath and sighed as he held her against him. "He was saying whatever it took to make him not feel guilty, he knew he was responsible for that baby's death. And now he will pay for it. Olivia, he is never going to hurt you again."

"I know," she whispered softly squeezing Elliot's hand in hers.

That evening they visited a shady little place in the back row of a local cemetery. Olivia knelt down and traced her fingers over the words carved into the little headstone. "Baby Boy Stabler," she exhaled slowly and placed a single white rose on top of the headstone as she felt Elliot's hand squeeze her shoulder. She stood and he pulled her into his arms. They just stood there holding each other not saying a word, looking down onto the grave of their murdered infant. Somehow justice didn't feel as good as they had imagined it would.


	35. 35 Beautiful Distraction

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Thirty Five: Beautiful Distraction)_

It had been a long and tiring day and Elliot caught Olivia as she walked toward the elevator on her way home.

"Hey, look there is something I have been wanting to talk to you about but I haven't really had the chance. With Nick's arrest and the trial and work I just have not had five minutes alone with you in over a week. Do you think maybe we could go somewhere and talk?" Elliot stood with her in front of the now open elevator door, but neither of them got into it.

"Elliot, I'm tired. I really don't want to go out tonight and I'm not in the mood to drink."

"We don't have to go out or drink. I just want to see you, Liv. I have not even seen you in forever, I miss you."

The truth was she had kind of been avoiding him. Not just him, everyone. She just hadn't been in the mood to socialize with anyone or hear them comment on the situation with Nick or anything else. She had just needed some time alone. Olivia looked at Elliot as the elevator door closed.

"What did you have in mind?" She asked.

"Let me come over and make you dinner. Whatever you want. I can pick up a bottle of wine." Olivia shot him a look of disapproval, "or something else. Come on, it will be nice."

"Conversation about the Nick situation is off the table," she said.

"Agreed," he replied. She stood considering the agreement. "Look, I will behave myself, I promise. Hands to myself."

"Okay," she said softly. She was after all starting to miss his company as well.

Olivia went home and took a hot shower. She knew this was a casual evening with a friend and not meant to be a romantic dinner. She wanted to wash the smell of work off of her so she could completely relax and figure out what it was that Elliot was up to.

Around five thirty Elliot arrived and started cooking some kind of pasta in her kitchen. Elliot was a wonderful cook. And whatever it was he was making made the apartment smell wonderful. He reached into the cabinet and pulled out two wine glasses sitting them onto the counter.

"What is this?" She asked staring him down.

"I know you said no wine, but I thought one glass with dinner to help you unwind."

Olivia took the glass of red wine from his hand and smiled. He leaned in and kissed her forehead. He was glad to see her starting to relax. This past week had been really hard on her. After Nick was arrested, Olivia had to go to the trial and testify against him. She had to sit in front of a group of total strangers and relive all of the pain and abuse that she went through because of him.

Nick was sentenced to ten years in prison for the second degree murder of her son and another two years for the assault and battery charges against Olivia. But he would be up for parole after just seven years. He lost his license and would never be able to practice medicine again. It was all kind of bittersweet. He went to prison, but not for as long as they had hoped. And something about reliving all of this was really torturing her. She had tried so hard to put it all behind her and was just starting to move on with her life. Then she was forced to face it all again. Elliot was pretty certain this was why she had been so distant lately.

Tonight it was his goal to make her smile again and to help her be happy again. He hated seeing her so down. Elliot placed two plates of the pasta on the table and lit the candle between them. Then he motioned for her to sit down as he pulled the chair out for her.

"I thought this was just going to be a casual dinner?" She asked.

"It is," he replied. "I casually lit the candle and poured you another glass of wine." She laughed a little and he smiled at her. Then he reached across the table and took her hand kissing it. "Just relax, you don't have to have your guard up with me. I am not after anything here. I just want you to loosen up and not be so tense. Unwind a little."

Olivia lifted her glass and placed it to her lips taking a sip of the sweet red wine. She sighed and set the glass back on the table as she took a bite of the pasta.

"What do you think?" Elliot asked.

"It is really good," she replied with a smile. He was so sweet. He had been worried about her so he came over to take care of her. Sometimes she neglected to let him know just how much she appreciated him in her life. And lately, she had all but pushed him out of it. Olivia looked across the table and smiled at him again. "Thank you," she said softly.

"You don't have to thank me for this," he replied.

"Well, for this and for just being here for me, always. Thank you."

"Well, you are welcome my dear," Elliot said reaching for her hand. But Olivia leaned in and kissed his lips instead.

"I know I have been really distant lately. I guess I kind of pushed you away. I was just…"

"It's okay, Liv. You have had a lot to deal with. I understand that. Everything is okay now," Elliot said smiling at her until she smiled back at him.

"What was it that you wanted to talk to me about?" She sat up at attention and focused her eyes on his.

"Oh yes," he said looking into her eyes. "Next weekend, is the annual policeman's ball… I always go with Kathy…"

"I never go," Olivia cut him off.

"I know you don't. But I have the tickets already. I was really hoping that maybe you would make this exception and go with me. Liv, come on it would be fun. And it is your birthday."

"Oh God," she exhaled placing her head in her hands. "I was hoping that the entire world would somehow forget about that."

"Not a chance! I have never forgotten your birthday, what makes you think I would start this year?" Elliot looked at her and she seemed almost uncomfortable.

"Elliot, I just don't know if…"

"Liv, it will be fun. We can dress up and dance and everyone else will be there. And I can show you off. I'm sure I'll have the most beautiful date in the place. It will be fun. Kind of like prom. Then there is the after party every year at Cragen's cabin. Liv? Come on? Are you going to make me beg?"

She didn't realize this meant that much to him. What was the big deal? It was a stupid dance they held every year to raise money for the department. Olivia took a deep breath and looked into his eyes. "So we're talking dress, tux and limo, right?"

"Yes, you get the dress I will take care of the rest."

"Elliot," she laughed, "I have never seen you like this. I just don't understand what the big deal is."

"I don't know really, it is just fun. We get out away from here and spend a night out relaxing and having fun, everyone, together, nothing to do with work. And we raise money at the same time. Liv, I paid over $300 for these tickets. We can't just let them go to waste. It will be fun, I promise."

"Okay, I'm sure I will have a good time as long as I am with you," she said with a smile.

The next day Olivia went after work to find a dress. She still wasn't sure what the big deal was, but this meant a lot to him so she was going to go and enjoy herself for him. She looked through a hundred different styles until she found one she liked. She tried it on and it fit perfectly. This dress made her feel like a princess. The dress was black chiffon and layered and fell just above her knee. It had spaghetti straps that crossed in the back and kind of floated when she walked. It looked amazing against her tan skin. "This will work," she said to herself as she held her hair up trying to decide how to fix it.

The next several days flew by fast and before she knew it the big night had arrived. She slipped into the dress and her hair and make up were perfect. She slid on a pair of stiletto heels and a pair of dangly chain earrings just before Elliot arrived at her door.

"Wow," he said as she opened the door and he stared at her.

"You are looking pretty sharp yourself," she said as he stepped inside.

He put his arm tight around her and kissed her lips. "I thought I would get that out of the way, I have the feeling I am going to be wanting to kiss you all evening and wont be able to in a crowded room." Olivia smiled.

Elliot poured them a glass of wine as she rushed around the apartment trying to make sure every detail was perfect. "Almost ready," she called to him.

Before long they were seated side by side in the back seat of a limousine.

"Here," he said handing her the tickets to put in her purse.

Elliot held tight to her hand as the long black car pulled up in front of the hotel where the event was being hosted. Waiting in the lobby were Munch, Fin, Cragen and their dates. They stepped out of the car and Elliot proudly escorted her into the building. Olivia felt like Cinderella on the arm of her Prince Charming. As they approached the door to the main ballroom Olivia reached for the tickets.

"Elliot," she said with concern. "Do you have the other ticket?"

"What?" He asked looking at her. "I thought I gave them to you to put in your purse?"

"El," she said smiling nervously, "I only have one ticket."

Cragen and the rest of the group stood at the door waiting for them. Elliot checked the pockets of his jacket and pants, but the ticket was no where to be found. He grabbed Olivia's hand and pulled her aside.

"I must have dropped the ticket back at the apartment. You go on in with them, I'll run back and get it. It won't take twenty minutes. I will be right back."

"Are you sure?" She asked.

"Yeah baby, I will run across town to the apartment grab the ticket and be back before dinner is over." He pulled her around the corner by the hand. "It will be okay, go in and have fun. I will be right back," Elliot kissed her soft lips. "I love you."

"I love you, too." She watched as he ran back outside to find their limo driver.

Olivia rejoined their group of friends and they all sat around the table in the ball room for the evening meal. She sat distracted wondering how on earth they could have lost that ticket and hoping that he was able to find it. Finally about half an hour later and just in time for the dance to start Elliot returned.

She spent the rest of the evening wrapped in his arms as they danced and enjoyed themselves with their friends. It was so hard for them to hide the way they felt around their friends. Everyone knew he was sweet on her, but no one knew exactly how far their relationship had gone. Before long the dance was over and it was off to the smaller event with about thirty people at Cragen's cabin. Here everyone drank and talked and just hung around each other.

The place got pretty loud after a little while and Olivia walked around looking for a rest room. After about ten minutes of searching she found it. She sat her glass of wine on the counter near the sink and checked her hair and make up. Then she shut off the light and walked back out into the hallway.

"There you are," she heard a voice behind her say.

She smiled and then turned to face Elliot, who leaned in to kiss her. He backed her up against the wall and kissed her passionately.

"El," she whispered. "Everyone is right down the hall." She ran her fingers through his short hair as he kissed her neck and collarbone and then moved back to her lips.

They moved along the wall kissing and touching until they reached the first door then ducked inside and Elliot locked the door behind them. It was an office, dark and quiet. The perfect place for the to be alone for a while. He lead her over to the desk where a dim moonlight shined in between the blinds. Olivia sat her wine glass on the edge of the desk and reached out for him. Elliot lifted her to sit on the edge of the desk and he continued kissing her as he moved his hands over her body, up her back and shoulders.

Olivia tipped her head back allowing him full access to the sensitive skin of her neck and he kissed it. Elliot slid his hand between her knees and under her dress, up the inside of her thigh and past her stockings. She could feel how turned on he was as he pressed his body against hers and kissed her. He continued his hand up under her dress and she moved hers down to unbutton his pants.

She exhaled softly as Elliot slid two of his fingers inside of her. She trembled and held her body close to his. He seemed to know exactly what he was doing and it took everything inside her not to scream out in pleasure. She leaned back and the straps of her dress slid off both shoulders. Elliot placed one hand behind her back as he kissed down her shoulders and across the top of her dress, still moving his fingers gently inside her. He wrapped his arms around her thighs and slid her body up to him. With a quick move he slid off her panties and pushed her skirt further up as he tilted her body back pulling her hips toward him. He was just about to enter her when the office door flew open.

Olivia closed her eyes and fell against his chest. She slid one hand down adjusting her skirt so that neither of them was exposed. Elliot still had his pants up and they were just undone in the front, but in the dark the intruder could see nothing but them sitting there kissing.

"I am so sorry," a drunken woman's voice muttered. "I was looking for the bathroom."

"First door on the left," Olivia said pushing her skirt back down between her legs.

"Thanks," the woman replied and then she was gone again.

Elliot and Olivia just sat there for a moment in the dark. Then they both laughed.

"That was close," he said smiling at her.

"I thought you locked the door," she said softly.

"Apparently the lock is broken. Liv, I'm so sorry," he said buttoning his pants.

"Don't be," she replied as she slid off the desk and picked up her panties off the floor. She looked up at him and they both laughed.

She exhaled deeply and hugged him. And he kissed her as he stared into her eyes. "This will happen," he said confidently. "It is liable to be the event that kills me, but it will happen."

Olivia smiled and kissed him then turned around to put her panties back on before they returned to the party. Not a word was said between them about what almost happened in Cragen's study.


	36. 36 The First Night Of Forever

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Thirty Six: The First Night of Forever)_

On the way home that night she sat with her head against his chest in the back seat of the limousine, playfully twisting his untied bowtie in her fingers. He had one arm around her and leaned in to kiss her behind the ear. Olivia squinted her eyes in reaction to his warm breath as it entered her ear and laughed a little. Elliot slid his hand down and laced his fingers in hers and with his pointer finger turned her jaw toward him so he could kiss her. One kiss turned into two, then three and before long a dozen sweet kisses and his hand was up her skirt again.

"Elliot," she whispered pushing his hand back down her thigh.

Elliot stopped and looked into her eyes.

Olivia ran her fingertips along the exposed area of his chest where his top three buttons were undone. "I don't want to do this here," she said looking back up at him.

"Honey, it's okay he can't see us the divider is closed." Elliot looked at the almost saddened look in her eyes. He took a deep breath and kissed her tenderly.

Olivia closed her eyes to try to make the moment work, but it was no use. She raised her hand to push him back breaking his embrace on her. "Do you really want the first time we make love to be in the back seat of a car?"

"Liv, it isn't a car… it's a limousine and it's kind of sexy."

She sighed and pushed him off her and back into the seat beside her, then turned to look out the tinted window.

"Liv, it was a joke."

She looked at him and he could almost see tears welling up in her eyes. He wanted this to be perfect for her and his hormones were about to ruin everything.

"Elliot, the driver is right on the other side of the glass. In seven minutes we will be back at my apartment and anything you can finish in that time, I can live without!"

Okay, now she was pissed. He had to make this right, somehow. He didn't really mean to upset her, he was just trying to get her in the mood. Olivia took a deep breath and sighed as she crossed her legs and turned her entire body away from him. Elliot sat and watched her, praying she wasn't going to cry. He never meant for any of this to happen and he felt horrible. He had treated her like every other man in her life and he had to find a way to make it up to her. They both sat quietly for a few minutes and the silence was killing him.

"Liv, I'm sorry. I let things get out of hand. I was a jerk and I'm sorry," Elliot sat waiting for her to turn and look at him, but she didn't. "I'm sorry about earlier. You mean more to me than some quickie on the desk in an office and I never should have taken you in there in the first place. Then I climb in here and try to manhandle you." Olivia dropped her head and was staring into the floor. Elliot reached over and gently turned her chin until she looked at him. He ran his hand up the side of her jaw as she nestled the side of her face in his hand. She stared into his eyes and he gazed deep into hers. "I got carried away and I am sorry. You are right. I love you Olivia. And I want our first time together to be something amazing and beautiful and everything you have ever wanted. I want to be with you, I want to make love to you, not screw you in the back seat of a car."

Olivia twitched her nose a little, this was not quite the apology she was looking for. He had done really well until that last part. She took a deep breath and slid in against his chest as he put his arm around her once more and kissed the back of her neck. She looked up at him and batted her eyelashes, "I love you, too." Olivia rested her head against Elliot's chest until the car had stopped and the chauffer opened the door for them to get out. Elliot tipped the man and they headed upstairs to her apartment.

Elliot stood behind Olivia as she opened the door and went inside. She dropped her purse over the edge of the couch and reached for the lamp. As she turned on the light and looked up she noticed the rose petals all over the apartment floor and leading down the hallway to the bedroom. She smiled and turned to look at Elliot who now stood holding a dozen white roses with a big red ribbon. She stared into his eyes as she felt a tear roll off her cheek. Elliot walked up to her and wrapped her tight in his arms. He put his forehead to hers and kissed her lips. Their kisses became more intense by the second until she dropped the roses to the floor to throw her arms around his neck and pull him closer to kiss him more.

"Liv, baby… Wait a second." He kissed her once more then broke their embrace to walk around the kitchen counter and pour them both a glass of champagne, from the iced bottle he had left on the counter. Olivia reached into the floor and picked up the roses smelling them then sitting across the counter from him on a barstool. Elliot handed her a glass of the sparkling drink and she smiled at him as she took a sip.

"How did you pull this off?" She asked him.

"I had to be sneaky," he said as she smiled at him. Elliot moved back around the counter and wrapped his arms around her waist.

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah," he said placing a soft kiss against her lips. "When I came back for the ticket, I did this. I already had the champagne and roses in the front of the limo. The driver had my ticket, I only handed you one." Elliot smiled at her as he looked lovingly into her eyes. "I was counting on the fact that you would be too busy to notice."

"You set me up?" She smiled at him.

"Yeah, I did. But I needed time alone in the apartment and that was the only way. I wanted to do something special for you." Elliot cupped his hand and placed it on the side of her face, the way he had done a hundred times before.

"Thank you. You are so good to me," she whispered kissing his hand.

Olivia stared into him with her sole full brown eyes and leaned in to kiss him pulling him closer to her. He placed his hands on her hips and slid her across the barstool and all the way against his body until her chest was against his. He could feel her breathing against him and the pounding of her heart as he kissed her again. She pulled his tie through her fingers and placed it on the counter, then began to unbutton his shirt kissing down his chest as she exposed it a little at a time.

Elliot pushed his waist between her knees as he kissed her and slid a hand up each of her legs. She pulled his shirt out from his pants and pushed it backward off his shoulders. He kissed her neck and the tender spot behind her ear as she moved her fingers over the muscles in his strong arms. Elliot leaned her back in the chair as he raised each of her legs up near his chest kissing it as he removed her stockings and tossed them into the growing pile of clothing in the dining room floor. Olivia leaned her entire body into his as she closed her eyes and kissed him. She moaned slightly and smiled as he kissed around her neck and gently bit her earlobe. Elliot ran one hand along her neck as he kissed her there, he knew this drove her crazy. He cupped both hands and slid them under her butt lifting her as he carried her to the bedroom and laid her down on the bed.

Olivia laid on her back with her eyes closed as he kissed her neck and shoulders. She turned her head to the side and opened her eyes focusing on the rose petals he had scattered across the bed as he bit her earlobe once more. She looked into his eyes as she ran her hands down his chest to his abdomen and unbuckled his pants sliding his belt off and dropping it to the floor.

"Elliot," she whispered as she kissed his lips.

"Yeah," he moaned.

She sat up over him and looked into his eyes. "Give me a minute," she said as she climbed across the bed leaving him there alone.

Elliot closed his eyes and exhaled as he pulled her pillow from the bed placing it over his face. He was going to have to get control over himself or he wasn't going to last long. Ideally, he wanted to spend the entire night making sweet passionate love to her, tending to her every need and desire. Realistically, it had been months since he had even had sex and if he let himself get too aroused by her too soon, he probably wasn't even going to hold out until she finished. Elliot took a deep breath and tried to focus. The trick was to think romantic, he was making love to her, not screwing her brains out like his body wanted to. He had to think sexy and sweet and slow and not get too carried away. If he let his mind wonder and the erotic fantasies slip through, he was going to be in a lot of trouble. They had waited so long for this night, if he ruined it over something like losing all self control she would never forgive him. He would never forgive himself. Tonight had to be perfect.

Olivia returned from her bathroom wearing a floor length black satin gown. She looked incredible. The gown had thin straps and lace across the top that you could almost see through, the long skirt had a slit on each side that went all the way up her long legs. Elliot bit his lip. He was in trouble.

He sat leaned against the headboard and just stared at her for a second. He had never in his life seen a woman half as beautiful as she was. She walked slowly across the room to the edge of the bed. Elliot sat up and turned to reach up and touch her. He placed one hand on her stomach and slid the other one over her hips and caressed the small of her back. She knelt beside the bed to look into his eyes as she smiled. She was the fantasy girl every male between fourteen and sixty dreamed about and she was real, right here with him. Elliot leaned back as she moved toward him slowly crawling across the bed to straddle him. He leaned back as she moved in over him kissing his lips and moving slowly down his chest. He had never wanted anyone or anything more than he wanted her right now.

Olivia moved back up to his mouth and kissed him more passionately than he had ever been kissed before. Normally when she kissed him like this she closed her eyes, but this time she stared deep into him. Elliot leaned in closer as he ran his thumb over her jaw line. He loved to feel the shape her mouth took when it fused with his. He moved his hand slowly up her cheek and pulled the pin from her hair allowing it to fall down around her face. She moved back down to the floor pulling his pants off, then made her way back over his body to straddle him again.

Elliot looked into her eyes and could see the fire in them as she stared back at him. There was no way she didn't feel exactly how turned on he was by her. Elliot moved both hands up her back and moved his fingers under the straps of the gown until they slid from her shoulders. The gown now rested against her chest and the slightest move would send it crashing to the floor. He slid his hands under the slits in the skirt and pulled her into him. She now felt his erection against her thigh as he held tight to her turning her and laying her down on the bed. He liked to be on top. She had learned this from every time they had almost had sex. He liked to feel he was in charge.

Olivia laid on her back staring up at him as he leaned in kissing her again. Each kiss became more heated and more intense until she could almost orgasm from his kiss alone. She didn't just want him anymore, she needed him. And somewhere inside herself she was sure if she didn't have him she would die.

Elliot slid his hands under her gown once more this time pulling off the matching lace panties she wore and holding them in his hand. He raised her left knee to place it against his chest as he raised up and slid into her. Olivia tilted her head back and moaned. Somehow he was bigger and better than she had ever imagined he would be. Even their little escapade in the dark earlier that night had left a lot more to the imagination then she had thought.

Elliot shifted her other knee so that he now held one in each hand, then he leaned in closer to her body as he began to move slowly inside of her. She stared into the cool pools of blue in his eyes as he focused his attention on her reaction to every move he made inside her. This was strange for Olivia. With everyone she had ever been with before him she always wanted to close her eyes. To hold them tightly shut and concentrate on the movement of their bodies. But with Elliot, she couldn't take her eyes off his. She didn't want to close her eyes even for a second for fear that she would miss something, a smile or just the blue of his eyes. She was afraid to blink, that when she opened her eyes again this would have all been a dream. And if it was a dream, she never wanted to wake up.

Elliot stared into her eyes, the color of chocolate and her lips like wine. He wanted so badly to please her, to show her how much he really loved her. He memorized every sound she made as he moved inside of her and kissed her lips. Little moans and gasps when she would inhale nothing but his breath because their mouths were so close to one another. Sometimes she would almost coo or pant to him because she was unable to speak. But they were all good sounds, sounds he never wanted to forget. He reached up and brushed a stray strand of hair from her eyes and he sped up his movements just a little. Her breathing changed and was now more shallow and sharper.

"Am I hurting you?" He whispered.

"No," she gasped giving him a shy smile. The truth was she had never felt such pleasure from sex. Every move he made inside her made her want to scream. And every once in a while she would get carried away and let a few words slip from her lips. Elliot would smile at her with every gasp of an "Oh God," or "yes, yes, right there," or "a little to the left," but his personal favorite was the whisper of her soft "oh baby," against his ear. He could tell that she was trying not to talk to him, almost like she had conditioned herself not to talk during sex. But he wanted her to. He wanted to hear every thought in her head and follow every direction she gave him. He wanted this to be the most amazing sex either of them had ever had. And so far for him, there was no comparison.

Elliot slowed for a moment and raised up to look at her. Olivia arched her back pushing herself up onto her elbows against the mattress to look at him. He was still inside her, but had quit moving completely.

"Are you okay?" She asked leaning in to kiss him.

"Yeah," he said softly. "I just thought I would give you a moment to catch your breath." They looked at each other and they both laughed.

Olivia sat up a little more and raised the gown over her head tossing it aside. She sat up and kissed Elliot's lips then gave him a seductive look as she lowered herself back to the bed. She wasn't finished yet. She moved her hands down Elliot's chest. She then took his hands and placed one on each of her breasts. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him back down to her as she kissed and playfully bit his shoulder. That was it, he was ready to go again.

Elliot felt himself thrust deeper and harder into her. Sometimes to the point that he was sure he had hurt her, but she never complained. She just stared into his eyes with a look of sheer ecstasy and moan her little "yes, yes, yes," as she pulled him tighter to her body. She held him like she was afraid he was going to leave her, but that was the furthest thing from his mind.

Elliot felt her hand slide down his back and claw it's way back up. It had been well over an hour and a personal record for him, and they hadn't stopped moving together. She felt so good. He didn't want to stop, but wasn't sure how much longer he could hold on. He was pretty sure she was getting close because her "Oh Gods" and "yes, yes, yeses" were all starting to run together into one long sentence.

Elliot raised up just a little and stared into her eyes. They were both covered in sweat and there was no telling who's was who's. "Are you getting close?" He whispered to her softly.

"Oh yeah," Olivia cooed as her breathing got heavier and she pulled him closer to her.

Elliot pushed her hair back to stare into her eyes. He wanted to see the way they looked when he finally pushed her over the edge. He raised up on her hitting a little higher inside her than he did before, he listened to her breathing and knew he was doing something right. He moved his hands down her knees and sped up his movements again as she ran her hands down his abdomen just over the area where he was inside her. He pushed just a little harder into her as he slid his hands under her back raising her off the bed and bringing her to sit upright on his lap.

She pressed her lips to his as they tightened their grip holding tight to each other and moving faster together. He liked her this way. Sitting on him he could see in her eyes every time he touched her just right. They moved their hips hard together and he could see it in her eyes this was it. Olivia tipped her head back and moaned as she felt the warmth of his release inside of her, he was watching her eyes as they lit up like fireworks exploding in the sky. Elliot groaned as she raised her head and pressed her forehead to his staring into his eyes once more. He felt her body fall almost limp against his as he lowered her to the bed and kissed up her chest listening to their echoes of heavy breathing in the dark. He thrust slowly in her a few more times until he felt her body tremble under his and brought her to another small orgasm. She slid her hands down his back and brought his head to lay against her chest.

Elliot laid against her body for a few moments almost unable to move. Then his eyes met hers and they both smiled and laughed a little. She blinked her pretty brown eyes at him and he kissed her gently.

He pulled her into his arms and they just laid together for a little while, both completely exhausted. He felt her skin stick to his from the sweat of their union. He ran his fingers along her bare back as she rested against him with her chest against his. They held each other quietly for a while, but neither of them could fall asleep. Elliot leaned down and kissed her forehead as she shifted her tired eyes to look into his. When their eyes met, they both smiled and he tightened his arms around her.

"Happy Birthday baby," he said softly with a laugh.

"Actually, my birthday isn't until tomorrow," she replied.

Elliot shifted and pointed across the room to the clock on the dresser. It was now 2:57 am and her birthday. She smiled up at him as he kissed her again. He held her tight for a moment. Then sat up in the bed.

"Where are you going?" she asked pulling the sheet up to her.

"No where," Elliot said reaching his arm under the bed and pulling out a small gift bag. She looked into his eyes and smiled as he handed it to her. "Aren't you going to open it?" He asked watching her face for a smile.

"You planned this, too?" She asked.

"Just open it," Elliot replied kissing her lips. He laid back in the bed and she leaned into him as she opened the bag pulling out a small teal colored jewelry box with the words "Tiffany & Co." on the top. She held the small box in her hand for a few moments just staring at it.

"Elliot," she said with tears in her eyes shaking her head.

Elliot kissed her gently. "Just open it," he whispered.

She took a deep breath as she lifted the top off the box and looked inside. She stared down at it as Elliot reached over turning on the lamp on the nightstand.

"What do you think?" He asked watching as a smile crossed her face.

She shifted her eyes up to meet his. "It's beautiful," she said softly kissing him. In the box was a small diamond cross necklace that sparkled like the stars. She pulled it out of the box and held her hair up as he hooked it behind her neck. Elliot reached up and touched it then kissed her again. He pulled her against his chest holding her hand in his.

"El, why a cross? I'm not exactly a religious person."

"I know," he said, "but I am. I know sometimes it is hard for you, especially lately to have faith because you have lost so much. But you are never alone. You will always have me and God on your side, no matter what. Maybe this will remind you when life gets tough." Elliot laced his fingers in hers and kissed her hand.

"Thank you, I love it." She said turning to look at him.

"Olivia," Elliot said softly brushing a piece of hair back from her eyes. "I know how much you wanted that to be a ring," he said.

"No, Elliot. Actually I was glad it wasn't…"

Elliot placed his thumb against her lips. "Yes, you did. I could see it in your eyes. You never could lie to me. It's okay, I did too. But I knew that you weren't ready for that. Liv, I love you with all of my heart. I have never felt this way about anyone else in my life. And I never want to again. Only with you." Elliot reached beside the bed and picked up a second little teal box and sat it down on his chest.

Olivia felt the tears falling uncontrollably from her eyes as she trembled and pressed her lips together. She just stared at the box unable to move. Elliot watched her closely, but she didn't move.

"Open it," he whispered into her ear.

"I can't," she answered softly.

"It's okay," he said holding her tight. "Just open it, don't be afraid."

Olivia picked up the little box and opened it then picked up the diamond ring inside and held it between her fingers. She had never seen anything so beautiful in her life. The ring cast a glare onto the ceiling and walls as it sparkled in the light of the lamp. Olivia was crying and she had to remind herself to breathe.

Elliot took the ring and slid it over her ring finger on her left hand. It was a perfect fit and sparkled almost as much as her eyes. It was a princess cut 2ct. Diamond solitaire and the band had smaller diamonds all the way around it.

She looked at him and shook her head pulling the ring off her finger and putting it back into the box. "I can't," she said softly. "I'm just not ready for this." Olivia felt her heart pounding in her chest so hard she thought she would throw up. She was so afraid that if she turned him down she would lose him. But there was no way she was ready for this.

Elliot closed the box and placed it in her hand. "I know that. But I want to marry you Olivia. Spend every day with you. Fall asleep with you each night and wake up next to you every morning. And raise the kids together, someday maybe have a few together. I love you more than I ever thought I could love anyone. I know this is all still new. And neither of us are ready now. I want you to hold on to this for me, until you are ready. You don't have to wear it, not yet. But someday… Liv, promise me that someday you will be my wife. Think of it as sort of a pre-engagement, engagement. The promise that someday, you will let me place this ring on your hand and tell the world that you are finally going to be my wife."

She closed her eyes as Elliot kissed her lips. She tried to imagine her life without him in it, but there was nothing. She couldn't exist without him. "Okay," she whispered softly.

"Really?" Elliot shouted with excitement.

"Really," she said softly as he brushed the tears from her cheeks and kissed her.

"And if you want a different ring, we can take this one back…"

"No!" She cut him off. Olivia looked at him and smiled, "I love it."

Elliot opened the box so they could look at it again. "I looked at a thousand rings before I found this one. When I saw it, I just knew. It was the only thing in the entire store half as beautiful as you are." Olivia smiled at him and he kissed her passionately.

"El," she whispered placing her head against his chest.

"Yeah," Elliot said nibbling on her ear and kissing her neck.

"There is no way I can do that again tonight, I will be lucky if I can even walk tomorrow." She looked at him as they both laughed.

"It was pretty amazing though," he said placing a small kiss on the tip of her nose.

"Yeah it was. Without a doubt the best I have ever had," Elliot was proud to hear her say this.

"Really?"

"Yeah," she said smiling at him. She stared up into his eyes waiting for a reply.

"Me, too." She smiled her seductive smile and crawled over him to kiss him. Before long they had fallen asleep together with a large diamond shining on her left hand.


	37. 37 Regret

**-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

**Author's Note:**

**This chapter returns to the present and brings you back to we left off in Chapter Three: Alone In The Night, Elliot was sitting next to Olivia's hospital bed after her attack. Everything between that point and Chapter Thirty Seven is a memory he has shared with her over the past year. I apologize if this story it hard to follow, but this was the only way I knew to write it so the reader would get the full effect. Feedback Please! **

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Thirty Seven: Regret)_

Elliot felt his phone vibrate in his pocket and opened his eyes. For a moment he had forgotten where he was. He looked around the room, still dark in the early morning hours. Then turn his attention to her resting there in the bed, sleeping like an angel. He leaned in and gently kissed her forehead, like he had done a million times before. He pulled the cell phone from his pocket and stepped outside her hospital room door to answer.

"Stabler," he said still quiet from the short nap he had managed to get.

"How's she doing?" He heard a familiar voice ask.

"No real change yet, she's resting. We should find out more tomorrow. What have you got?" Elliot asked.

"I looked up our little friend Nick Parker," he heard Fin's voice say. "Elliot, it wasn't him. The good doctor is still serving his time for what he did to her before. Even with good behavior he's not thinking about parole for another four years."

"I'm not sure if that is good news or bad at this point. I mean, I promised her I would never let him hurt her again. But at least if it was him, we would know who we are looking for. We've got to find this guy," Elliot said.

"We will. We've got every person in our department and half the officers in the city looking for this asshole. Cops don't take well to one of our own being attacked. Look, we all care about her Elliot. We are going to find this jerk and make him pay. I'll call you as soon as I get more news," Fin replied.

"Yeah. Fin thanks. I wouldn't feel right with anyone but you guys heading up this investigation. I know you will do everything you can. I, we, really appreciate all of your help."

"That's what we do, man. I know if the situation was reversed, she'd be out there fighting for me. I call you tomorrow, try to get some rest."

Elliot closed his cell phone and just stood there for a minute. He knew that her case was in the best hands. Fin was very protective of Olivia, almost like she was a little sister. If Fin found the guy who did this, he was in a lot more trouble than he bargained for. Elliot walked down the hall and got a bottle of water from a vending machine then returned to her bedside. Her medication should be wearing off in a few hours and he didn't want her to be alone when she woke up. He sat down and leaned his head against the bedrail to look at her.

He watched her, trying to remember every detail of the last time he saw her before all of this went down. It was Saturday night. He had called her to come over to his apartment to review a case. But when she arrived, he had other things on his mind. It was all an excuse to get her alone and in his apartment. He had fixed them a romantic dinner with wine and candle light. Work had been crazy lately and it had been almost two weeks since he had even held her in his arms. They needed this time together.

Elliot remembered the smile that crossed her face when she walked into the apartment and saw what he ha done for her. He took the case file from her hand as he placed a soft kiss on her lips.

"We won't be needing this tonight," he said as he tossed onto the kitchen counter and lead her toward the dinner table. Elliot turned on some soft music and they danced. They moved slowly together as he kissed her lips. He laced his fingers in hers and guided her down the hallway to his bedroom where half a dozen candles cast a soft glow throwing their shadows against the bedroom wall. It was not long before their two shadows had become one. They made love then he held her tight in his arms. It was almost crazy how much he missed her when they were unable to be together like this every day. After just a few hours of sleep she woke him with a gently kiss to make love again.

He loved this about her. He had never been with a woman who wanted sex as much as he did. Sometimes with Olivia, she wanted it more than he did. But somehow he always managed. They couldn't get enough of each other. With them it was about more than sex. The sex was amazing, but it was so much more. It was about the intimacy. About finally being able to give yourself completely to another person and be loved unconditionally back. Neither of them had ever been loved like this before.

Infact Olivia had never really been loved her entire life until she met Elliot. The only family she had ever had was her mother. A woman who due to her own suffering, never allowed herself to truly love anyone. Because of this, Olivia was never fully able to trust anyone. Even at work, with Fin and everyone. She trusted them probably more than anyone, but she never let her guard down even with them. Even with Elliot, the trust was not there from the start. A little, yes. But it took years of him being there beside her, no matter what, for her to realize he wasn't going anywhere. This was when their relationship began to change. They began to really open up to each other and became best friends. He was the first stable relationship in her life. The only person she knew was always going to be there no matter what. The first real friend and family she had ever had. The only person in the world who made her feel safe.

The next morning Elliot's alarm clock buzzed waking them both from their deep slumber. He sat up on the edge of the bed putting his feet against the carpet. Olivia rolled over on her stomach and slid her fingertip slowly down his bare back.

"Why would you set your alarm for seven o'clock on a Sunday morning?" She asked softly. "Come back to bed," she whispered.

Elliot turned to look at her and she shot him a seductive glance. He reached around and took her hand as she started her fingertip back up his spine. "Baby," he said kissing her hand, " you drive me crazy when you do that."

"I know," she replied sliding one leg over his and sitting up beside him in the bed. She kissed his passionately and he knew exactly what she wanted. She tilted her head and kissed the side of his neck, as she caressed his back and shoulders with her hand. He placed his thumb against her chin and turned her face so he could look into her eyes. Then he kissed her again. She arched her back and pulled off his tee shirt that she had picked up from the floor and put on before falling asleep the night before, then tossed it aside. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled them both back into the bed.

What seemed like moments later Elliot opened his eyes and rolled over to look at the alarm clock. It was nine o'clock.

"I'm going to be late," he said as he jumped from the bed and ran to the closet tossing a navy suit and tie onto the bed where she still laid.

Olivia rolled over still half asleep and watched him as he zoomed around the room gathering his clothes. "Late for what? Babe, it's Sunday."

Somehow she was hoping that he would come to this realization and climb back into the bed beside her. Then they could pull the covers back over their heads and spend the day together taking cat naps and making love all afternoon. He was after all, the one who started this when he invited her over the night before. She sat up in the bed and covered herself with a sheet as he ran for the shower. Olivia took a deep breath and rolled back over in the bed, burying her face into a pillow.

She opened her eyes again a few minutes later when she heard him shut the water off. Elliot walked back into the bedroom wearing nothing but a towel. Olivia sat up to watch him as he dried himself off and got dressed.

"Can you help me out here?" He asked sitting on the edge of the bed as she tied his tie for him.

"Got a hot date?" She asked looking into his eyes.

"I promised the kids I would take them to church. It starts at eleven, I can't be late. Time check," he said looking down at his watch.

"You're fine," she replied smoothing her hands across the shoulders of his suit jacket. "In more ways than one," she said as she winked at him.

Elliot laughed and leaned in to kiss her lips. "You should go with us. If we leave…." he looked down at his watch again, "ten minutes ago, then I have plenty of time to run by you apartment so you can change." He smiled at her and kissed her softly. "Go with us." He ran his hand softly down her bare back as goose bumps instantly appeared there, this little trick worked both ways.

"Stop, that's not fair," she laughed pulling away from him. "You go and spend the day with the kids, you hardly get to see them anymore. I will see you tonight." She twisted his tie in her fingers.

"Liv, my kids love you. I love you. You know some day, they are going to be our kids."

"I know," she said gazing adoringly into his eyes.

"So come with us." Elliot began to place soft kissed on her neck as if trying to persuade her. "We'll go to church. Then we'll all go out to lunch, as a family. Then, I don't know, the zoo maybe. A family day."

"You can still have a family day, El."

"Liv, we can't have a family day with out the whole family." He stared into her eyes, hoping she would realize what he was trying to say. "Baby, you are my family. You and me and the kids. My whole world. I think it's time we all start doing things as a family. You have not even seen the kids in months. Not since we lost the baby." Elliot didn't even realize he had said it until the words were already out of his mouth. He turned his eyes to look at her so afraid he had just hurt her. He felt so stupid now, of course it would be hard for her to be around the kids after losing the baby. And here he sat trying to push her into it. Elliot took a deep breath and looked into her eyes. "I'm sorry sweetheart," he whispered. "I didn't mean…."

She leaned her forehead against the side of his neck and just sat there quietly for a moment. "I'm just not ready yet, Elliot." She said softly. She looked up at him and tried to force a smile and hold back tears at the same time. "I love the kids. And I love spending time with them. I just don't think that I could face them right now. I just need a little longer."

He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her tight into them, then kissed the side of her cheek. "I understand," just holding her for a moment. "So what are your big plans for the day?" He asked.

She sat up and looked at him, she knew he was trying to switch to a safer subject before she began to cry. "Well, I think I'm going to go running. And then get some work done on that file, see if I can't get something figured out on this case."

"Then I will see you tonight?" Elliot asked as he stood up to leave.

"Will you be wearing this suit?" She asked with a smile as she twirled his tie through her fingers once more.

"Baby, I will wear what ever you like."

"Then I'll be here," she whispered as she kissed his passionately. "I love you."

"I love you, too darling." He said as he kissed her goodbye. She rolled over in the bed wrapped in his sheets and smiled up at him. The sunlight cast a golden glow over her skin and he had never seen her look more beautiful.

Thinking back on that moment now, he would give anything for the chance to crawl back into the bed and stay with her. Just be there with her and not let her out of his sight. If he had just stayed there and spent the day with her like she had wanted he could have protected her. If he wouldn't have left, she would have spent the day at his apartment and never went to hers. She wouldn't have gone running, she would have been there, in that bed, wrapped in his arms and safe. Elliot felt a warm tear as it fell from his cheek onto the sheet beside her. He pulled her hand to his lips and kissed it softly. "I'm so sorry baby," he mumbled through tears. He had really let her down this time. He stared at her over the bedrail as his eyes became heavy. Before long he had fallen asleep once more.


	38. 38 Secrets and Lies

_***** WARNING: PARTS OF THIS CHAPTER GET GRAPHIC. I HOPE I DON'T OFFEND ANYONE. I TRIED NOT TO MAKE IT REALLY BAD. PLEASE LEAVE FEEDBACK! *****_

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Thirty Eight: Secrets and Lies)_

What seemed like only moments later had actually been hours. Elliot opened his eyes slowly as he felt her squeeze his hand. He raised his head as she stirred, her eyes still closed coming out of her sleep. He watched half excited to finally be able to look into her eyes and half horrified of the fear he might find there. What was he going to tell her?

"Elliot," she moaned softly as she opened her eyes and stared at the wall ahead.

"I'm right here Liv," he said lowering her bedrail a little to look at her.

He turned to look into her eyes. They looked so tired. He wanted so badly to hold her tight in his arms and let her know everything was going to be okay. But he was afraid he would scare her or hurt her.

She stared at him for a minute before a warm smile crossed her face. "Hi," she said softly.

"Hi," he said back to her trying not to let her see that his heart was breaking. He hated seeing her this way, thought she actually looked really good for all that she had been through. He could not imagine how anyone could hurt her. Elliot leaned in to kiss her, but she flinched away from him.

She closed her eyes tightly and gasped for air as she gripped the bedrail. Elliot pushed the call button for the nurse. He watched her as tears streamed down her face and she opened her eyes again. This time she refused to look at him.

"Oh Elliot," she breathed softly. He moved his hand slowly across the bed so he didn't scare her again and laced his fingers in hers gently.

"It's okay now," he whispered.

She shifted her eyes down to look at his hand holding hers and she squeezed it tight. "I'm so sorry."

"Baby, you don't have anything to be sorry about. He attacked you. Honey, you didn't do anything wrong."

Now she was crying, Elliot wanted nothing more than to hold her tight and let her know that he was there for her. But she was afraid of him. This monster had hurt her so bad she didn't know who to trust anymore. Elliot just sat there beside her bed refusing to let go of her hand and let her cry.

Olivia turned her head to look out the half opened blinds. It was early afternoon and the sun was shining outside. She couldn't help but feel a little betrayed that a day this beautiful could follow such a horrible night.

A few minutes passed and her tears had stopped. Elliot watched her closely and could almost see her slipping into cop mode. She turned her eyes to look at him.

"It was about four thirty. I came home from running. I was going to take a shower and my doorbell rang. I figured it was you. I went to the door and it was a delivery, red roses. I kind of thought it was odd and I reached out to take them as the delivery guy brushed past me and sat them down on the table. I handed him a tip and he turned to leave. I had an awful feeling. I was thinking, Nick…" She gasped for air and Elliot tightened his hand around hers. "I reached down for the card to see who they were from and I heard the apartment door close and lock. I turned to look at him and he grabbed me. He had a knife. He put his hand over my mouth and the knife to my throat and said if I screamed he would kill me. He said if I didn't do everything he told me to, he would kill me."

Olivia paused for a moment as the doctor entered the room. She looked pale and confused and Elliot watched her shaking as the doctor examined her. She was almost afraid to let him touch her. Elliot never let go of her hand. He knew at this moment this was probably the only thing he could do to help her. Sit with her and hold her hand and never let go, show her that he was here and she wasn't alone. The doctor left the room again and she leaned back in the bed. She looked once more down at their hands folded neatly together and she moved her fingers between his, but didn't let go.

Elliot looked up at her as she concentrated on focusing on anything in the room but him. She took a deep breath and started again. "I tried to fight him off," she said softly taking a staggered breath. "I hit him and I tried to run, but I couldn't. I got as far as the living room before he grabbed my ankle pulling me down to the floor." Tears were streaming down her face again as she stared off into nothing. It was almost like she was watching the event take place in front of her and telling him what she saw. "Before I knew it, he was on top of me. I fought him. I hit him and kicked him and even bit him once on the shoulder. He pushed my hands up over my head and held me down. I got a hand free and I slapped him scratching his face and making him bleed. That is when he jerked the lamp off the table. I turned and tried to get away, but he hit me hard with it. Here," she said raising her hand to the wound on the back of her head.

"I felt weak," she continued. "But I had to get out of the apartment. He rolled me back over to face him and I struggled with him as he tried to hold me down again. I looked into his face, for a moment trying to memorize it. I knew every detail, but I can't remember it now. That is when he raised the lamp to hit me again. I put my hands up over my face and turned my head. That must hand been when he hit my hand. There was so much blood. I was trying to concentrate on getting help, somehow getting out. I turned and tried to crawl away, I couldn't move my hand. He grabbed me by the hair and pushed me down against the carpet. I couldn't fight him anymore. The room went dark and I could feel him behind me, pushing against me."

She got quiet for a minute and broke down crying again. "He whispered to me, from behind me, in my ear. His breath was hot and smelled like old cigars and whiskey. I felt sick and dizzy. He kissed the side of my face and he said to let go. Let it happen, don't fight it. He told me that his face would be the last thing I saw as he forced me to look at his eyes, cold and dark. I couldn't move. I tried so hard to get up, but I couldn't move. I closed my eyes. I could feel him," she raised her hand to wipe a tear away. Elliot was glad she wasn't looking at him because he was crying, too. "I thought I was dying. I must have blacked out because the next thing I remember was waking up here. And you holding my hand. That was when I realized that it would be okay." She turned to look at him.

Elliot moved slowly in next to her. He raised his hand and cupped it softly against the side of her face the way he had done so many times before. He held it there for a second before she nestled her cheek into it like she always did. He stared deep into her eyes and slowly moved in and gently kissed her lips. He pulled back just a little and looked lovingly into her eyes. "I love you," he whispered. As he watched her eyes filled with tears again.

"I love you, too. Elliot…" she sobbed for a moment then drew a deep breath to speak. This was one of the ten billion things he loved about her. She tried so hard to be strong, even in the worst situations. She raised her hand and placed it over his. "I'm pretty sure he…."

"I know," he said cutting her off. He didn't want to make her say it, to make her feel any of it again. "Melinda Warner came in and did a rape kit while you were unconscious. I wanted it to be her. I didn't want some stranger…." Olivia squeezed Elliot's hand again and he looked into her eyes. "She got semen and hairs, and skin from under your fingernails. Munch and Fin are heading the investigation. Captain Cragen has half of New York out looking for this guy. We're going to get him. And when we do, we will have DNA from the skin sample she got to put him away."

Olivia took a deep breath. She wasn't crying anymore, she was back in cop mode. "Did they check out Nick?"

Elliot smiled at her. "Fin already did, he is still in prison. It wasn't him."

"I don't know who…"

Elliot placed his finger softly against her lips. "Right now you need to rest. We have the best of the best on this. You are in good hands. The doctor said they have you scheduled for an MRI later to make sure everything is okay. I think you need to relax for a while. Are you hungry? I can get you something."

"El!" she stared at him and he could tell his nervousness was making her uneasy. "I will be okay. I am kind of a mess right now, but I'm going to be fine. You have to stop doing this, you are making me a nervous wreck. I think maybe we both need to relax. Why don't you go find us something to eat? My MRI is in twenty minutes, then I am going to see about taking a shower and getting cleaned up. Really, I'm going to be okay."

Elliot looked at her and smiled. He leaned in slowly to kiss her again. Then headed down to the cafeteria to in search of food. Olivia watched the door and waited for it to latch behind him. She held out for exactly seventy seven seconds before she broke down crying. She hated that she couldn't break down in front of him. But she felt so sick and so ashamed of everything that had taken place. She knew he loved her and she needed that. Part of her was almost afraid that if he saw her like this, he wouldn't love her anymore. She knew it wasn't true. She just needed to be alone right now and to feel everything she was feeling. Without Elliot telling her it was okay, it was natural. Or running on her the same lines they used on every rape victim they had ever worked with.

He was being so sweet and so understanding and trying to be a good friend and boyfriend, but right now it almost made her sick. Thinking about all of the details. All of the horrible little things that she would never tell him. Like how the man stuck his tongue in her mouth, making her taste him as he was inside her. How she cried so hard and begged for him to stop, that she almost couldn't breath. How she bit him while he was raping her, so he flipped her over holding her by the hair against the carpet and raped her again. How she hoped and prayed Elliot would somehow walk in and save her, but he never came. How she closed her eyes and cried and wanted to die. She had prayed for it all to just be over, then she blacked out.

She could never tell Elliot any of this. She could never tell anyone. Olivia pulled her knees to her chest and closed her eyes. She had to get control of herself. Elliot would be back soon and if he saw her this way he would know that she wasn't okay. She took a few deep breaths trying to control her breathing. She leaned back in the bed and turned her head to look out the window. She could see the sun shining through the half opened blinds. She felt a little betrayed that such a beautiful morning, could follow such a horrible night. It was better, she thought, for Elliot to just think she didn't remember everything. Because if he knew all of the details she did, they would haunt him too.


	39. 39 Little White Pill

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Thirty Nine: Little White Pill)_

Elliot was on his way up from the cafeteria with enough food to feed about six people when he ran into Melinda Warner in front of the elevator.

"Elliot, I have some news. I got a match in the system," she said proudly handing Elliot a file. "Well, not a match exactly. But thanks to the DNA Olivia was able to provide us on the perp I was able to tie her guy to six other cases."

"The guy is a serial?" Elliot asked looking down at the papers in front of him.

"There's more," she turned the page. "He's a murderer, too. Infact, Olivia is the only one he left alive. I'm not so sure he doesn't know she isn't dead. My guess he held her down until she blacked out and quit moving. When he was finished with her, he got up and left the same way he got in. Through the front door with a vase of roses in front of his face so no one could identify him. Munch said they found a few rose petals and a blank card in the apartment, but no vase. That is how he got into the building. All he had to do was buzz and say there was a delivery or wait outside for someone else to come home. He had the flowers so his act was convincing. No one would have thought twice about letting him in. I'm guessing he watched her for a while, he knew her routine and that she lived alone. He had probably even seen you in and out of the apartment and figured she had a boyfriend. The roses were the perfect cover to get into the building. But with the others he suffocated them. Hyoid bone was broken on all six bodies."

"Liv said he pushed his way into the apartment to sit them down for her. She knew then something was probably up. But it was too late, he was already inside. He turned like he was leaving while she was distracted with the flowers and locked the door then attacked her. So for him it is about the attack. There was no robbery involved. He roughs them up and rapes them. He talks to them. Then he forces them to look at him while he tells them he is going to kill them. He wants to see their fear. He wants that power. But with Liv, he screwed up. He underestimated her. She worked out, she was stronger than the others. She fought him back and he lost his control. He hit her in the head with the lamp to try to even the playing field. He hit her twice. Once in the back of the head and once more in the temple, but the power of the second blow was blocked by her hand when she shielded her face. There was a lot of blood and she blacked out. The bastard thought she was dead. So he took his time. Then got up and walked calmly out of the apartment."

"She saw him, Elliot. It's part of the M.O. He held her down and made her look at him. Do you think she can identify him?"

"I don't know. She said she tried to memorize his face, but now she can't remember it. Maybe if we got a line up. First we have to get a suspect." Just then Elliot's phone began to vibrate in his pocket. "Stabler," he said looking at Melinda. "Fin, tell me you got something. Yeah, yeah, you're kidding me. That's great. Let me know when you've got him in custody. Thanks." Elliot hung up the phone and looked up at Melinda. "We got a suspect! Munch and Fin are on their way to pick him up now."

"That's great, Elliot."

"I need to get back in to Liv and let her know, thanks for all of your help."

Elliot walked in to Olivia's room and sat the food down on the counter. He turned to look at her and she gave him a funny look.

"Elliot, what?" She asked.

" We got him! A guy walked in to the Rose Garden Florist downtown and attempted to purchase a dozen red roses with a dead girl's credit card. Victim number six, Courtney Case. They told him the card had been reported stolen, he took it and ran. He left us a nice picture on the security camera. Fin crossed the card with other rose purchases made in the area. At four o'clock Sunday afternoon we got him on security camera at Donovan's Florist making the purchase. Their card reader was down and the sales girl had to take an imprint and call it in. They were busy, so she imprinted the card and let him go. Donovan's is six blocks from your apartment. He planned it. He bought the flowers and sat outside the apartment until you returned home. Gave you time to get inside and let your guard down, then made his move. The sales girl caught the plate number on the car he was driving. ATM camera across from your building puts that same car parked outside your apartment from four fifteen until just after five o'clock. The ATM camera also gives a good face shot of him getting back into the car to leave, flowers in hand. Munch and Fin are on their way to pick him up now. "

"Oh my God," she whispered. "He killed a girl."

Elliot looked at her for a second. "I just spoke to Warner, there were six victims before you. He killed the last girl."

Olivia leaned back in her bed and placed her hand across her stomach. "I feel sick."

"Liv, we got him. Thanks to you, we got him. Warner found these other cases when she ran the DNA from your kit."

"Elliot, I need time to process this. I can't talk about this with you right now."

"You're right baby, I'm sorry. He leaned in and kissed her cheek."

"El, I think I just need some time to be alone for a little while." He looked at her and she had tears building up in her eyes.

"Okay," he said softly. "I'm going to take a walk and call Fin, see what's going on. If you need me, call my cell phone." He kissed her forehead and walked slowly out of the room. Elliot tried not to feel hurt that she had asked him to leave. He wanted so badly to be there for her, but he also tried to understand that sometimes she just needed her space.

Elliot walked down the hallway to the waiting room and sat in a chair. He pulled his phone from his pocket and flipped it open and closed a few times before putting it back into his pocket. If Fin had any news he would call. He glanced up at a television across the room in the corner and watched as the man on the gospel program preached. The volume was turned down and Elliot could hardly make out the words. But it was comforting all the same. He looked around the room. Seeing only a few people sitting around, like him, waiting. He slid down in the chair and exhaled as he looked at his watch, then folded his arms behind his neck and stared up at the ceiling.

Olivia sat in her room after a shower and an MRI. She was thinking how she had probably been too hard on Elliot. He was just trying to do whatever he could to help her. And he was scared too. She took a deep breath and sunk back into the bed trying to relax. Just then a nurse entered the room.

"How are you feeling?" she asked with a smile.

"I'm okay," Olivia lied.

"Well, I need to get you started on some antibiotics. They took some blood samples earlier and sent them off to the lab. It is standard in cases like this."

"I know," Olivia cut her off.

"I'm sorry, Detective." The woman looked up at her and Olivia knew she had no idea what to say to her.

"The antibiotics," Olivia suggested looking at her.

"Yes, these will help fight against any infections. I will make sure to send a prescription with you when you are discharged."

Olivia nodded her head and swallowed the pills with a little cup of water.

"And this one," the woman said handing her another medication cup with a small white pill in it.

"What is this one?" Olivia asked staring down into it.

The woman placed her hand on Olivia's shoulder and looked into her eyes. "This is a morning after pill. It is to help prevent pregnancy. Now, this one is completely up to you. But I am required by law to offer it."

Olivia felt a tear roll down her face as she sank back into the bed holding the small plastic cup in her hand. "Can I have a little time to think about it?" She asked the nurse.

"Sure honey," you push this button if you need me.

Olivia tried to force a smile through tears and nodded her head. She stared down into the cup at the tiny white pill. She couldn't help but wonder if her mother had been given this option all those years before, if she would have ever been born. She just sat there for close to fifteen minutes staring at the little pill, not sure how she even felt about it. Then she sat up and placed it on her tongue as she drank the cup of water. That tiny white pill, was the hardest pill she would ever have to swallow. She sank back into the bed and took a deep breath as she tried to wipe the tears from her eyes.

A little while later Elliot was startled by the vibration of his phone in his pocket. He reached down and opened it, placing it to his ear.

"Stabler," he said yawning. He must have fallen asleep.

"Hey Elliot, we got the guy. But we can only hold him for twenty four hours. We need Liv for a line up."

"I don't know if she is ready for that. Or if she even can."

"Can you talk to her? Fine out what's going on. We got the evidence, but we need her to identify him. If she can do that Novak can put him away. Elliot, she's going to have to testify, she is the only real witness. I mean we got security camera footage and the sales clerks from both florists, but Casey says we need Liv."

"I'll talk to her. We're waiting on the results of her MRI, if they are clear she will probably be discharged in the morning."

"We got him until seven o'clock tomorrow evening. See if you can make it happen. I will talk to you later."

Elliot looked down at his watch, it had almost two hours since he left Olivia's room. He stood up and got two cups of coffee from the machine then headed back to her room. She was sleeping when he walked in. Her hair was different, pulled back now and she smelled like hospital shampoo. Elliot leaned in and kissed her cheek. She opened her eyes and looked up at him.

"There you are," she said with a smile.

"I brought coffee," he said as she sat up in the bed.

"Thank you," she said taking the cup from his hand. "I'm sorry El. I didn't mean to snap at you, I just…"

"It's fine, you were right. I wasn't even thinking that you might need a little time alone." Elliot laced his fingers in hers again and kissed her hand.

"I finally got to take a shower," she said smiling. He could tell she felt better. "They did the MRI and results were good. I'm fine and can go home tomorrow." Olivia sat quiet for a minute. "Well, I guess I can't really go home."

"You can go back to my place. Stay there as long as you'd like," he said placing his hand against the side of her face. "Liv, they need you to come in for a line up."

"When?"

"As soon as possible, they can only hold him twenty four hours. We should probably go there after you are discharged."

She looked down at the blanket on the bed. "What if I can't do it Elliot? What if I can't remember his face? Then I let all of those other girls down."

"Don't worry about that now. It's getting late. You should try to get some sleep, we both should. It's been a long day and tomorrow it going to be a long one too," Elliot kissed her lips gently and pulled the blankets up around her. Then walked across the room turning out the light. He sat in the chair beside her bed and found her hand in the dark, holding it tight.

"Elliot," she said softly.

"Yes."

"I love you," she replied.

"I love you too baby," he said and he leaned in and kissed her once more.

He watched her in the dark as she yawned and sank her head into her pillow closing her heavy eyes. He closed his eyes and tried to get some sleep as well.


	40. 40 Daniel Lee Brody

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Forty: Daniel Lee Brody)_

The next morning after her discharged from the hospital, Elliot took Olivia to the station for the line up. She stood glaring through the glass at the empty room where her attacker would soon be standing. She took a deep breath as she felt a hand on her shoulder. Olivia shifted her eyes to follow the hand until she could see the face of the body it was connected to.

"Hi Case," she said softly.

"Hey Liv," Casey replied. "Look, I'm going to skip over my usual spiel about how this works. I know you are more than familiar with the process. I'm going to have to ask Elliot and everyone else to leave the room though. I don't want to chance his attorney trying to say we spoiled the line up somehow. I want this to stick as bad as you do."

Olivia took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. Casey noticed her begin to tremble.

"Olivia, I'm going to be right here the whole time. Take your time. Do this at your pace. It will be you and me and the defense attorney in here. Do you want to walk in there and take a look before we bring them in, they say that sometimes helps."

"No, I just want to get this over with." Olivia stared at the glass as the lights in the room she was in dimmed showing only the other side of the glass. Six men carrying cards walked in and stood in a line. She felt herself shaking uncontrollably as Casey placed a hand on her shoulder for support. She felt her breathing shallow and tears begin to stream from her eyes as each man stepped forward, turned sideways then returned to his assigned place in the line.

Olivia closed her eyes and raised her fingertips to touch the small gash on her temple. She slid her hand up into her hair trying hard to remember his features. Just then a flash of the man's face appeared in her mind. She gasped. "Let it happen, don't fight it." She mumbled quietly.

"What?" Casey asked.

"That is what he said to me. My face will be the last thing you see." Olivia took a deep breath and stared through the window.

Casey pushed the intercom button and asked each man to step forward and repeat the line. One by one they complied.

Olivia watched nervously, still trembling uncontrollably as each man said the line. When number four stepped forward to say the line she felt her knees weaken and she felt almost sick. She placed her hands against the ledge around the glass to steady herself, she had to get this right. She forced herself to stare into the man's face as he repeated the words he had said two days earlier while he was raping her.

Olivia gasped for air. She felt sick and weak and could no longer control herself. She broke down crying and slid down the wall in the dark room. She pulled her knees to her chest and buried her face in them as she sobbed uncontrollably.

"That's enough," Casey said as they drew the blinds over the glass and turned the lights up again. Casey knelt in the floor beside Olivia placing her hand on the back of Liv's head. "It's too soon. I'm sorry."

Olivia tilted her head to look up at Casey and wiped her sleeve across her face pushing away tears. "No," she said softly. "That was him. Number four. I know it was him."

Casey nodded her head to Olivia, as she helped her to her feet. "She identified your client, Mr. Felcher, Daniel Lee Brody. We'll see you in court Counselor," Casey said as she escorted Olivia out of the room and into the locker room where Elliot was waiting to talk to her.

Olivia buried her face in Elliot's shirt and he wrapped his arms around her. After a few minutes she had calmed down enough to sit down and talk to him. He turned her around and sat her down on the bench in front of the lockers as he looked into her eyes.

"Are you okay?" He asked.

"I think so," she whispered. "Elliot, why did you wait in here?" she asked looking around them.

"I wanted a place we could be alone, where they wouldn't come parading him through and make you see him again. And Fin's passed out in the crib." Elliot laughed and brought a smile to her face. "How did it go?" He asked.

"Okay, I guess. I know I identified him. But I have not had a chance to talk to Casey about it yet."

"Why don't you wait right here for a minute and I will go and make sure he's gone. Then I will take you to talk to her."

"Okay," she whispered.

A few minutes later Elliot returned. "The coast is clear, Casey's waiting to talk to you."

Liv raised her hand and placed it in his. "Thank you," she replied as she stood up and kissed his cheek. Elliot placed his hand in the small of her back and escorted her out to see Casey. As they walked out Olivia noticed Fin and Munch both sitting at their desks. She stopped to thank them both for all of their help on her case. Casey walked up behind her.

"You did really good Liv," Casey said smiling at Olivia. "We're going to get him."

"We're the other women able to pick him in the line up?" Olivia asked looking at Casey.

"What other women, Liv?" Casey asked. "You were the only one we brought in."

"Elliot said that there were six other victims. He killed the sixth girl. What about the other five? Wouldn't this be a stronger case with their testimony?"

Casey looked at Olivia, then glanced quickly at Elliot. "Yes, it would Olivia. But unfortunately, I cannot get their testimony."

Olivia looked confused. "What do you mean?"

Fin stepped up to her sitting her down on the edge of the desk and taking a seat beside her. "Look Liv, the other women can't testify because they are all dead. You are the only one who survived his attack. And that is probably only because you passed out and he thought you were dead."

Olivia's eyes widened and she looked at Elliot. "What? Oh my God!" She said as she stood up and walked back toward the locker room.

"Liv, wait!" Elliot called out and grabbed her by the arm, but she looked at him with tears in her eyes and pulled away from him.

"Way to go, Fin!" Elliot said glaring at him.

"No, Elliot! How was I supposed to know you hadn't told her?"

Elliot stood up and pushed Fin back, "You should have just kept your mouth shut!"

"No Elliot, you should have told her! Did you think she wouldn't find out? How did you think she was going to feel being the only one in that court room not knowing the truth about her own case? She needed to know and she needed to hear it from someone she trusted before she heard it from some news reporter or in a tabloid somewhere! You screwed up here Elliot don't you dare pin this on me!" Fin backed down from his defensive position to allow Elliot time to think. Had it been anyone else to push him like that he would have folded them up right there. He walked back across the room and sat down at his desk.

"Is there anything else you neglected to tell her Elliot?" Casey asked. "Because I need her to know and understand everything before I put her on the stand! A little stunt like this in court could blow my entire case and then this man goes free! I know that isn't what any of us want right now! So we all need to get our shit together and start concentrating on Olivia and how we all as her friends and co-workers are going to help her survive these next few weeks! Because she is going to need us all. As hard as this whole thing has been on her, it is about to get even harder. They are going to put her on that stand and make her relive every gory little detail of her attack in front of a courtroom full of strangers! And they are going to try to tear her apart! So put away the ego's gentlemen, this is not about you!" Casey picked up her files from Olivia's desk and walked out the door, obviously a little steamed at the overpowering testosterone levels in the room.

Elliot winced as the door slammed behind her. He stood up and walked toward Fin's desk. "I screwed up. I thought I was protecting her and all I did was hurt her. I snapped on you and I shouldn't have, I'm sorry. You were right, I should have told her."

"Don't ever push me again, man. We are on the same side here." Fin stared at him and Elliot nodded his head then walked toward the crib to talk to Olivia.

Elliot stepped in and tapped lightly on the door before closing it so they could have a moment alone. Olivia was laid across a lower bunk on her stomach with a pillow bunched up under her chin staring at the wall.

"Liv?" He asked testing the water.

"What?" She asked softly.

"I'm sorry," He said sitting down on the bed beside her.

She sniffled then rolled over on her side to look at him. She was still crying and he felt horrible for being the one to bring her to tears. "How could you just leave me in the dark like that?"

"I thought I was protecting you."

"You humiliated me, Elliot! That is what you did. In front of everyone. I was the only one in that room that didn't know and…." She sat up and closed her eyes for a minute. "I understand why you did it, but it still hurts. I was relying on you to tell me everything and you let me down."

"It will never happen again," he said brushing tears from both of her cheeks. "I'm sorry," he said as she leaned into him and he held her tight.

She turned her head and pressed her cheek against his chest as he climbed onto the bed and held her. She closed her eyes and seemed to calm immediately. It was the first time she had felt safe since the attack. Elliot opened his palm and she opened hers placing in against his. Then he ran his other hand up into her hair and pressed her forehead to his lips. He felt her breathing softly against him as his chest rose and fell. "You know this is going to get really tough before it is all over," he said against her forehead.

"I know," she exhaled.

"But I, we, all of us, are going to be here for you every step of the way. Don't ever think you are in this alone."

She sniffled and looked up at him. "I know that, too. Elliot?"

"What sweetheart?" He whispered.

"Is there anything else you forgot to tell me?"

"Nope, that's it."

"Good. Because the next time that happens, I'm kicking you ass Stabler."

Elliot laughed and looked down at her as she smiled. It was so good to see her smile again. He kissed her forehead again and held her tight.

"Elliot?"

"Yeah baby?"

She rolled over on her back to look up at him and slid her fingertips slowly across his jaw line. "I love you, more than anything in the world."

"I love you too, baby." Elliot leaned in and placed a soft kiss on her lips. He pulled back and stared into her eyes as she looked into his. Then she leaned forward and kissed him slowly as she slid her tongue into his mouth giving him a soft sweet kiss. Elliot let her guide him as she moved his hand onto her jaw. They held the kiss only for about twenty seconds before he felt her release his lips and she stared into his eyes. He wanted more, but it would have to wait. He didn't want to rush her, he was going to let her lead him at her own pace. Olivia laid her head against his chest and closed her eyes. Elliot just held her and let her fall asleep. For the next hour he held her next to him watching over her, protecting her as she slept.

After a while she shifted in his arms and woke them both up. Elliot looked at his watch. "I should get you home."

Olivia smiled. "Do you realize that is the first time since I was attacked that I have fallen asleep without medication?"

Elliot kissed her forehead and laced her hand in his. "You know they are probably all wondering where we are."

"No, the all knew I was angry. They know you are in here begging for forgiveness." She smiled up at him.

"I really don't think it is an accident," Elliot said.

"What?" She asked looking up into his eyes.

"How perfectly you fit into my arms," he replied as he slowly kissed her lips.

Olivia just stared at his with tears welling up in her big brown eyes, this time for a much different reason.

"Come on, I will buy you dinner," Elliot said standing to help her to her feet.


	41. 41 Justice

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Forty One: Justice)_

Casey had been facing off with Daniel Lee Brody in court for three days now and it was finally Olivia's turn to tell the jury what he had done to her. They had gone over the testimony over and over again, but somehow standing here in front of the large oak door to the courtroom waiting for the court officers to come out and get her it wasn't the same.

"Baby, you're pacing again. Why don't you come sit over here by me," Elliot tapped his hand lightly on the bench beside him.

"I can't sit Elliot. How can you sit? God I think I'm going to throw up," Olivia leaned against the wall and placed her hand against her stomach.

Elliot stood up and walked over to her leaning in to hug her. "You are going to do fine. You have gone over this a thousand times with Casey, you know exactly what to say you have it memorized."

Olivia looked at him. "Yeah I do have it memorized, Elliot because I was there. This happened to me. It isn't some story I have to pass off as the truth!"

"Honey, I know. I didn't mean it like that. I just meant, you know Casey isn't going to steer you wrong. No surprises. You know exactly what she is going to ask you and I am going to be right there. Fin is in there, testifying on your behalf about the case. Liv, you don't have anything to worry about."

Elliot stared into her eyes as she began to cry. He leaned in and held her in his arms.

"I can't do it El," she whispered in his ear. "I thought I could, but I can't face him. I don't want to ever. I never want to see him again," she sobbed. "Please, just take me away from here," she looked into his eyes and pleaded with him.

Just then the door opened and a court officer stepped out into the hall with them. "They are ready for you Ms. Benson," he said looking at Olivia.

Olivia just looked at Elliot.

"Yeah," Elliot said looking at the man, "we're going to need just a minute."

The officer stepped back inside and motioned for Casey to come out into the hall way to handle the situation.

"What's going on?" Casey asked closing the door to the court room behind her.

"She's scared, Casey. She doesn't want to go through with it," Elliot looked at Casey expecting the worst and preparing to shield Olivia from it.

"Then we wont," Casey replied.

Olivia turned and looked up at her. "What?" she asked.

"You don't have to do it. If you don't want to go through with it Olivia, I will go in there right now and tell that judge that we withdrawal the charges and you can go home. But before I do, you need to make damn sure this is what you want. If I do this Liv, he will walk free. Without your testimony, he leaves here a free man. I'm not going to make you do anything you are not ready for. But once he walks out those doors, I cannot bring him back in."

"She'll do it. She just needs a min…"

"Elliot this has to be her decision, no one else can make it for her."

Olivia took a deep breath and walked away from Casey and Elliot as she paced a few more feet down the hall. She stopped and stared at the wall for a second. "Casey, can you give me a second with Elliot alone?"

Casey nodded her hear and walked back over to sit on the bench in front of the courtroom.

Elliot approached Olivia. "What do you think?" He asked her.

"I want to do it, Elliot."

"I will be right there," he said. He looked at her as tears filled her eyes.

"Elliot, I don't think I can do this if you go in. I mean I know it sounds silly. I know you have read the case file and you already know every detail of what he…. I just don't think that I can sit on that stand and describe in detail every thing that man did to violate me and the things he said when he touched me in front of you," she was crying now and trying not to break down. "Elliot I'm sorry. Please don't be angry."

Elliot placed his hands on her arms and pulled her into his arms kissing her softly. "I'm could never be angry with you for telling me the truth," he said looking into her eyes. "If this is where you need me to be, then this is where I will be. I will be here for you, waiting right here for you. I love you." He wiped the tears from her face as she threw her arms around his neck and hugged him.

"I love you, too." She said taking a deep breath as they walked back over to the bench where Casey sat staring down at her shoes pretty sure her case was about to fall apart.

The court officer walked back out into the hall with them. "Ms. Novak, we're waiting for your witness," the man said sharply looking at Casey.

"We just need a few minutes," Casey said to the man.

"No, I'm ready." Olivia said.

Casey looked at Elliot and smiled, somehow he had pulled it off. Casey and Olivia entered the courtroom as Elliot sat down on the bench to wait. After what felt like an eternity, forty minutes later, the door opened again and Fin escorted Olivia out. She had been crying again and Elliot hugged her tight.

"You okay?" He asked looking at her.

She took a deep breath. "I will be," she replied softly.

"She did great Elliot," Fin replied. "Now we just have to let Novak work her magic."

Elliot placed his jacket over Olivia's shoulders and sat down on the bench allowing her to snuggle in against him. She was trembling again and he held her tight to try to make her feel safe. This time it was Fin pacing the hallway. Olivia sat so still and quiet that Elliot was sure she had fallen asleep.

She just looked down at her hand in his and realized how much he was there for her. How every difficult time of her adult life, he had been there to help her through. She didn't ever want to know what it was like to go through life without him by her side. She thought about how she had told the jury every single detail of her attack, even the parts she wasn't able to tell Elliot. And how his attorney tried to turn the situation around and make it looked like she had wanted it to happen or she had mislead Brody, but this was far from the truth. This was when she fell apart on the stand. When a room of total strangers looked at her with judging eyes and the defense attorney practically said it was her own fault she was raped. Olivia was horrified at the thought that this man may actually walk free and now he knew that she was still alive. What if he came back to finish what he had started? She took a deep breath and slid her fingers gently in and out from between Elliot's, not saying a word.

They sat up when they heard the gavel slam and people started filing out of the court room. Elliot grabbed Olivia and pulled her around the corner pulling her to his chest and covering her with his jacket as reporters flooded the downstairs lobby to talk to Brody's attorney. The crowd shuffled down the steps and soon Casey Novak was the only person still inside the courtroom. Fin held the door as they stepped inside then pulled it shut behind them.

Casey stood at a table in the front of the room gathering her files and notes from the trial.

"Case," Olivia spoke up from the back of the room. "How did it go?"

"It want great!" Casey said as they walked toward her. "You did great. I am sorry he was so hard on you up there. But you did wonderful. Brody got back to back life sentences on six counts of first degree murder, another 7 years for your rape Olivia and 10 years for the attempted murder of a police officer. We got him honey and he is not eligible for parole. At least not any time within the next one hundred years."

"Thank you so much," Olivia said hugging Casey. "No problem, Liv. Listen, I have been getting letters at the D.A.'s office. Some of the family members of the other six women would like to meet you. I know, this may not be a good time with everything you are going through. But it might help you. They want to thank you, because of you their daughters and wives are now getting justice."

"I would like that. I just don't think I could do it right now."

"I tell you what, I will bring the letters by. You can read them and then when you are ready, you can contact them."

Olivia smiled at Casey, "That sounds good."

That night as they approached his apartment he held her hand and turned to look at her.

"I am so proud of you," Elliot said to Olivia putting his hand under her chin and looking into her eyes. "You are the strongest person I have ever known. I love you so much. You make me want to be a better man." Elliot leaned in and kissed her gently. In that kiss they both felt the magic as it turned into another slow passionate kiss. Olivia closed her eyes tight as he kissed her on the step. A strong wind blew and she shivered in the cold, but didn't open her eyes. She could feel his hand against her face and she never wanted this moment to end. Elliot felt her tremble and moved his arms in around her their lips still locked tightly together. When the kiss had ended they stood together, holding hands on the step, both with their eyes closed.

Olivia took a deep breath and her eyes fluttered open slowly. Just then she felt an icy cold against her cheek and tilted her head to look up.

"Elliot," she said softly as he opened his eyes. "Look."

Elliot looked up and a million tiny snow flakes were falling all around them. It was the first snow of the season and the white flakes swirled around them as if they stood inside a snow globe that someone had just shaken. Elliot opened his palms and held them up as she opened hers and placed them against his. He slid his fingers between hers locking them together and staring deep into her eyes. She looked back into his and knew everything was going to be okay. Because in him, she had found home.


	42. 42 A Dream Come True

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Forty Two: A Dream Come True)_

The next two months passed quickly. Now they as a couple were fast approaching their first Christmas with the kids, splitting the two days with Kathy. Two weeks to go and Olivia and Elliot were planning to make this first family Christmas a perfect one. Elliot had taken the older kids and purchased a beautiful tree from a Christmas tree farm just across the Jersey state line. It now stood in the middle of the living room floor surrounded by gifts, mostly purchased by Olivia.

Elliot had always loved the look in her eyes around Christmas, even before he had realized he was in love with her. She had never had a real family to celebrate the holidays with so the idea of celebrating this year with Elliot and all five children was a dream come true for her. Elliot stood in the kitchen behind the counter watching her as she sat in the living room floor and wrapped the gifts she had carefully selected for the kids. Her gifts looked much prettier than the ones he wrapped. His all looked like he had just lost a fight with the tape dispenser. Maybe it was the female touch that she put on everything that softened it up. Each of her packages looked as if it could be on display in the window at Bloomingdale's. She always chose the most beautiful paper and hand curled each ribbon until it was absolutely perfect. She had so much more patients when it came to these little details than he did.

Olivia had never really stayed in her apartment again after her attack. Instead, she had brought practically all of her clothing and been staying with Elliot in his four bedroom apartment. She had all of her things in the guest room closet and they had even moved her bed into the room. She slept here when the kids spent weekends with them. But any other night, they took turns sleeping together in either her room or his. They were taking things slowly and Elliot was using this time to make her fall in love with him all over again. They still hadn't made love since she was raped, but that aside, they were closer than ever.

They had fixed up the other two bedrooms for the kids. They rarely ever had all five children a the same time. Mostly because Maureen was in college now. Kathleen in high school and often had dates or plans with friends so she didn't always spend the night. Most of the time they just kept the twins and little Eli. Elliot had put two twin beds in one room for the older girls and a set of bunk beds in the other room for the twins. Eli had a crib in the twin's room, but usually ended up in bed with Elliot or one of the girls. It was a little cramped, but they made it work.

Elliot poured them both a glass of wine then joined her in the living room. He had to walk through a maze of gift boxes to sit beside her in the floor and handed her the glass.

"Umm, thank you baby." She smiled and took the glass from his hand.

"When did you buy all of this stuff?" He asked her.

She looked up at her and smiled. "You think I went overboard, don't you?"

"Maybe a little. Actually I am glad you like to shop because I suck at gifts for the kids. I don't know what teenage girls want."

"Did you ever think of asking them? That's what I did."

Her answer seemed so simple as she stared up at him, the truth was Kathy had always been the one to get the kid's gifts. Infact they weren't the only ones surprised by what they got on Christmas morning. Olivia had carefully selected each gift for each child and then brought her purchase to show Elliot. She couldn't wait to share Christmas morning with them. "So what all did you get them? You know you are going to spoil them and they will expect this every year."

"Elliot what fun is Christmas to a kid if they don't get spoiled? Maureen and Kathleen both wanted clothes. That one was easy, since they both borrow my stuff all the time. Elizabeth was a little trickier, I had to call Maureen. CD's and drawing stuff. Dickie, wanted some sneakers that are really hard to find."

"No luck with that one, huh?"

"Oh, I ordered them online and they were delivered yesterday. He will be one of the few kids his age who actually got them. Because they have been on back order for six months. And Eli, well, I got him what every other eighteen month old child wants. Toys!" She laughed. "I wanted to get them all something to open here. I know you wanted to get them all one big gift each and I figured I would give them each a little cash and take them shopping for anything we may have missed."

"You are amazing," Elliot said staring at her. "I was thinking we could do a little shopping this weekend for the big gifts. I have a few ideas, but I want to get your opinion on some things first."

She smiled at him. "Thank you, for sharing all of this with me."

"You are very welcome," he said kissing her. "But the truth is I don't think I would survive it with out you. I would probably be handing out money in cards to a group of disappointed kids on Christmas morning around little white cartons of Chinese take out." They both laughed.

The next day at work Olivia sat at her desk making a grocery list. She had never really cooked a Christmas dinner or done grocery shopping for seven people. "Can you think of anything we need for this?" she asked looking at Elliot.

"I don't know honey, I have never cooked Christmas dinner either," he replied. "I was thinking, why don't we just make a reservation and go out. Somewhere nice. We can even have a traditional meal. Only no hassle or forgetting things or trying to cook all of that food in the apartment or figure out where to store leftovers and no cleanup. Then we can do something with the kids in the afternoon, like take them ice skating in the park. We would get to spend more time with the kids this way with less stress. And trust me, there will be quite enough stress just from the five children under one roof for two days."

"Okay, I mean if that is what you want. I think it sounds like a good idea. Because, I have a little confession…. I have no clue how to cook a turkey."

"Neither do I, maybe it's best if we start our own traditions. I think this is a good one."

"When are the kids coming over?" She asked.

"Kathy is doing their dinner with her mom on Christmas Eve around noon. I'd say probably by about four o'clock. The girls want me to take them shopping for you, we'll probably do that on the way home. I have some ideas, but I thought they would be good with suggestions. I figured we would rent some movies and just kind of chill out around the apartment that evening, maybe get some pizza. Then get up and open gifts. Have our dinner around two o'clock. And have them back to Kathy by six."

"You have really planned this out."

"Liv, I have five children. You have to plan things out when there are that many people involved."

She looked around the room at the people buzzing everywhere. "I'd better get busy," she said opening a file in front of her on the desk. "It is only my third day back and if I don't actually do some work Cragen is liable to find some excuse to get rid of me again."

The next day Olivia had taken the morning off to meet up with the parents of Courtney Case, the sixth victim of Daniel Lee Brody. She had met up with them for lunch to talk for a little while before she came in to work.

When Elliot walked in she was standing next to the coffee machine with her cup in her hand talking to Munch. It was cold out that day and snowing again. Olivia must have just got in herself, because her nose and cheeks were still blush colored from the cold. She had taken her coat off, but still wore her white scarf with little black snowflakes embroidered on it and the matching hat. Her hair was soft and wavy and she left it down, it layered perfectly around her face and she had her white gloves tucked under her arm. She looked so beautiful. Elliot stood there and stared at her for a moment mesmerized.

"Liv," Elliot said as he walked into the room and stood next to her desk motioning for her to come over to him. He had called her name pretty loudly so everyone in the room was now staring at them and Cragen and Casey stepped out of the office to see what was going on.

Olivia walked over and stood in front of Elliot with an embarrassed look on her face.

"Elliot, you don't have to be so loud now everyone is staring."

"Let them stare," he said as he knelt on one knee and pulled the little ring box out of his pocket. He had been carrying it around for the last month waiting for the perfect time to ask her. And now, here in front of their friends and co-workers seemed the perfect time and place.

"Olivia," Elliot said softly taking her hand in his. "I have never been more in love with anyone in my entire life. You are my partner and my best friend and I want to make you my wife. I am asking you now. Here in front of all of our friends, in the exact spot where I first laid eyes on you eleven years ago. Will you marry me?"

She stared down at him and saw the love in his eyes. "Yes." She answered confidently as he slid the beautiful diamond ring onto her left hand ring finger.

Everyone in the room was shocked as they watched him stand, pull her into his arms and kiss her passionately for the first time in front of all of their friends. All of a sudden everyone in the room began to clap loudly, most of them still unable to believe what they had just seen.

Elliot ran his hand along her jaw and kissed her once more. He slid her hat off and combed his fingers through her beautiful hair as he pressed his forehead to hers and looked into her eyes. "I Love you, baby." He said, proudly in front of everyone.

"I love you, too." She replied not taking her eyes off him. She swore she would never take his ring off her finger again.


	43. 43 The Christmas Gift

_**Immediate Danger**_

_**(Chapter Forty Three: The Christmas Gift)**_

**Olivia woke up alone the morning of Christmas Eve. Elliot had already gotten up and left but she wasn't sure where he had gone. She headed into work to try to get some things done so she could cut out early for their big holiday with the children. She had expected to see him, but he wasn't there either. **

**She spent most of the morning and early afternoon running down leads with Munch and Fin and tying up a few loose ends on a case they had been working on. When they returned to work, Elliot still hadn't made it in yet. She tried calling him for about the tenth time that day, but his phone went straight to voice mail. **

**Olivia started to get worried so she went in to see if Cragen had heard from him.**

"**Hey Cap," she said smiling as she opened the door to the office and lingered there for a moment.**

"**Olivia, is something on your mind?" He asked trying to coax her thoughts from her.**

"**Have you heard from Elliot?" She asked with a worried look on her face.**

"**Elliot has today off," Cragen offered up. "He put in for the personal day several weeks ago. I figured he would have told you."**

"**He didn't say anything. I was starting to get worried. Did he happen to say what he needed it for?"**

"**Liv, even if I knew I couldn't disclose that information. Not even to you. Personal days are personal, he didn't say anything to me about what he needed the time off for." Cragen studied Olivia's still worried expression. "I'm sure he is probably just finishing up his Christmas shopping or something. Maybe he wanted to surprise you."**

"**Yeah," she said trying not to show that she felt a little hurt that he hadn't even bothered to tell her what was going on. Olivia walked back to her desk and sat down. She tried to work, but was distracted by the thoughts running through her mind. Why would he have kept this from her? **

**She didn't want to be upset by this and hated that she let it bother her at all, but if they were going to share their lives together they couldn't have secrets. They had never had secrets between them, at all. So why now? He had to know that she would notice him missing. She took a deep breath and laid her head down on her arms, her head was pounding and she was probably over reacting. There was no reason to get all worked up over nothing. He probably didn't even think about mentioning it to her because it probably wasn't a big deal. **

**Olivia tried to distract herself for the next few hours, but there was no use it was the only thing on her mind. She left work around three thirty and stopped at the market to pick up a few things before the kids arrived that evening. While shopping she attempted once more to call Elliot's phone. Straight to voice mail. Okay, now she was starting to get agitated. No matter what his reason was for whatever it was he wasn't telling her about, he could at least pick up the damn phone or call her back! Olivia bit her lip as she grabbed a package of bacon and tossed it angrily into the cart. What the hell was his problem today? What if something had seriously been wrong and she needed to reach him? He was being so inconsiderate! She glanced down at the list she had made before leaving work. Coffee and Aspirin. Check and check. That was it, everything on her list. She loaded up her bags and headed back to the apartment. **

**Elliot should be picking the kids up about now and bringing them into the city. She hadn't seen the older girls in a few weeks and was excited to actually get the chance for them all to be together. Olivia, never actually having family, had someday always wanted a large family of her own. And if this was the way it was created that was fine with her. She and Elliot and the five children and she had known from the start that she wanted them to have at least one together. Of course, living in the city with child support payments and alimony on two Detective salaries was going to make this task a little trickier than she had planned. But she knew they would make it work somehow. Besides she also had a small inheritance and some property that had been willed to her by her mother, that would help them out a little. **

**Olivia realized that in getting side tracked she had completely forgotten she was upset with Elliot. She took a deep breath and tried to look angry as she approached the apartment and his car was already there. She was a little confused, there was no way he had picked up the kids at four and gotten back here by four fifteen. She stepped out of the car and looked up at the light glowing in the living room window, then pulled out her cell phone. This time she called the apartment number.**

**Elliot answered on the third ring. "Hello?"**

"**Hey, can you come down here and help me carry up groceries?"**

"**On my way," he replied hanging up the phone.**

**A few seconds later she felt his arms surround her as she leaned into the trunk of the car to get a bag. He kissed the top of her head and took the bags from her. She picked up the third bag and closed the trunk not saying anything to him at all as they headed up the steps and inside. They sat the bags on the counter and Elliot began to put away her purchases as she kicked off her shoes and hung up her coat. **

"**Where are the kids?" She asked taking a seat on a barstool on the other side of the counter.**

"**We're on our own tonight."**

"**We are, huh? What's up?"**

"**Well, Kathy's dinner ran late. Maureen's roommate invited her to their family dinner tonight, some of Kathleen's friends were having a Christmas party so Kathy asked if she could take the younger three to mass with her tonight. I figured I would just pick them all up in the morning. And that gives us a romantic Christmas Eve, A-L-O-N-E." Elliot looked at her and grinned as he poured them both a glass of wine.**

**Olivia smiled taking the glass from him and tapping her fingernails lightly against it. "What makes you think I want to get romantic with you?" She asked with a **_**where the hell were you?**_** look on her face. There was no way she was going to let this slide. Elliot leaned in to kiss her, but she pulled back just staring at him waiting for some kind of explanation for his odd behavior today. "El? What is going on? Where were you today? Why didn't you tell me you weren't going to work? And why do you not bother to return twenty missed call…"**

**Elliot placed his finger against her lips to stop them from moving. He turned and walked over to the desk as he picked up a beautifully wrapped gift box and handed it to her. "But first….." he said disappearing into the bedroom and returning with the most beautiful dozen red and white roses she had ever seen.**

"**Elliot, they are beautiful."**

"**They are candy cane roses. Or that is what they called them at the florist. I really think it is just a way of justifying raising the price $20 just because it is close to Christmas." **

**She smiled at him, he always made it so hard to be angry at him. He leaned in and kissed her lips. "I Love you." She said with her heart pounding and her eyes closed.**

"**I love you, too." He replied as he briefly nudged her nose with his and she opened her eyes. "Now this," he said handing her the gift box once more. "And might I add that I wrapped this one my self."**

"**Wow, honey, you are really showing improvement in your gift wrapping abilities," she replied coyly.**

"**Smart ass," he said refilling her wine glass as she slid her finger under the tape on the box and giggled at him.**

**Olivia removed the paper neatly setting it aside then opened the box. Inside was an envelope. Inside the envelope was a stack of papers. She slid the papers out looking confused as she glanced at them then looked back up at Elliot. He walked around the counter to look down over her shoulder. "What is it?" She asked still uncertain of the meaning of the pile of documents in her hand.**

"**Baby," he said flipping to the last pace of about six and pointing to some signatures, "these are my divorce papers."**

**Olivia looked up at Elliot. "What?"**

"**Yup," he said with a smile on his face. "As of about three o'clock this afternoon my divorce is final."**

**Olivia laughed shocked. She was happy and excited and couldn't believe this had happened so fast. She figured Kathy would have dragged it out in court for a while. "How did you do this? I thought they couldn't get you in to court until the third week of January?"**

"**Well, they couldn't. But after hearing of our engagement our good friend Casey pulled a few strings and got me an earlier date. She called a judge and made the arrangements. I spoke to Kathy. I folded on a few things and let her have her way so she gave in and agreed to the earlier court date. I also had to pay both attorneys a small fortune to come in on Christmas Eve, but it worked out. And now it is over and we can begin our life together and not have to worry about Kathy. I wouldn't let Casey say anything because I wanted to surprise you."**

"**Baby, I am so excited," she said with almost a squeal as she leaned in to kiss him and threw her arms around his neck.**

"**Me too," he said. "I am finally a free man."**

"**The hell you are!" She replied twisting his tie tight in her hang and pulling him in to her lips. "You are finally mine."**

"**Sweetheart," Elliot said looking deep into her eyes. "I have been yours for a long time, maybe before either of us even realized it." Elliot kissed her again. "There's more…. I figured since our little work get together thing was tonight, we could go out for a while with out friends and celebrate. I hope you don't mind, because I already told Casey to call everyone and meet us for dinner and drinks at six because we had some news."**

"**Sounds good, but you know they are all going to think I am pregnant?"**

"**Not yet," Elliot said wrapping his arms tight around her and kissing the back of her neck.**

**A few hours later they met up with all of their friends to share their news. Elliot and Olivia held hands the entire time they were there and could not stop kissing each other.**

"**Do you guys have to do that in public," Munch joked as Olivia sat on Elliot's lap kissing his lips softly.**

**She giggled and stared lovingly into Elliot's eyes. "Ah John, we're just happy to finally be able to do it in public."**

"**So exactly how long had this been going on before you decided to tell us?" Fin asked.**

**Elliot looked at Olivia and replied, "Oh, about eleven years." She smiled at him.**

"**How far had this gone before…." Casey started to ask. Olivia started to blush and picked up her glass from the table taking a drink to avoid answering the question. "Oh," Casey laughed and caught Olivia's eye. "And you never told me?"**

"**I'm sorry Casey, there are just some things that are private." Olivia looked at Elliot and he laughed.**

"**I had a hunch something was going on between you two," Munch said from across the table.**

"**Sure you did John," Cragen Chimed in. Everyone laughed as John Munch sat speechless. **

**As they stood to leave Elliot held Olivia's coat for her as she put it on. He wrapped her in his arms and slid her hat over her hair and stared into her eyes. "You know you're stuck with me now?" He asked her.**

"**If I had to be stuck with anyone Stabler, I'm glad it is you." She said with a warm smile.**

**He placed a finger to her lips as she bit it playfully. "you know this is a dangerous place for such a pretty girl to be?" He said and she gave him a strange look. "Look up," he whispered into her hear as she realized they had been standing under the mistletoe. **

"**So I guess now you think I have to kiss you?" She asked pulling back from him.**

"**Well, it is tradition." Elliot replied.**

"**You think I am going to kiss you just because of some stupid traditi….."**

**Elliot placed his hand behind her head and kissed her a deep intimate kiss right there in the doorway of the restaurant. She started to hesitate for a second then realized that they no longer had to hide their feelings for each other in front of their friends. Elliot released the kiss as she pulled him back to her and kissed him again. He kept one arm wrapped tight around her waist as if she might try to escape and moved his other hand up to pull her face to him. When they finally stopped kissing they looked up to see that everyone that had been sitting at their table had just witnessed their little public make out session. Elliot stood behind Olivia and wrapped his arm around her chest pulling her in to him and kissing the back of her head. **

"**I'm sorry guys," he said looking at the group. "I just can't believe that she is finally going to be mine." **

**Olivia smiled proudly as she felt his cheek next to hers and their noses touched briefly. This was definitely one of the best Christmas Eve's she had ever had.**

**They all called out Christmas greetings as they ventured out of the restaurant and parted ways into the snow. Olivia smiled and held Elliot's hand tight in hers as he put his arm around her in the car. He had given her everything she had ever wanted for Christmas. A family, time with their friends and the promise of a wonderful future together as husband and wife. And there were still a hundred gifts under the tree at home. **


	44. 44 The Sweetest Thing

_-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------_

_**Author's Note:**___

_**If you are someone who really gets into this story grab your box of tissues, this one's a tearjerker. I cried while I was writing it. I'm not going to say much else, I don't want to ruin it! But consider this your warning! ; )**_

_-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------_

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Forty Four: The Sweetest Thing)_

At home they cuddled together on the couch watching old black and white Christmas movies. Elliot wasn't much into them, it was more Olivia's thing. But he would sit on the couch and watch paint dry if it meant he got to hold her in his arms.

He stared down at their fingers locked together and kissed the side of her face. She smiled and tipped her head to the side allowing him access to her neck. He took the hint quickly as he began a trail of baby kisses behind her ear and ran them down her neck and onto her collarbone. He chuckled a little as she made a face and scrunched her nose up.

"What?" he asked.

"That tickles," she said with a shy smile.

"What? This?" He asked as he slid his nose in against her chin. Olivia laughed a little, but hardly made a sound. "Or this?" This time he kissed a tender spot on her neck, but as he did he bit it playfully. Olivia threw her head back against his chest stretching her neck like she had just been bitten by a vampire and let out a moan as she moved her hand behind his head pulling him to her for more.

Within seconds she turned her face to look at him over her shoulder and had pulled him in to her and they were kissing intimately, passionately, long, strong, powerful kisses. Elliot rolled them over and laid her down on the couch. He stared into her eyes and brushed his thumb over the soft curve of her jaw then kissed her again. It wasn't long before his fingers had found themselves wrapped in the hair. She raised one knee up beside him allowing him to settle his waist between her knees.

Elliot watched her for any sign of hesitation, but didn't see any. He ran one hand along the outside of her form fitting blue jeans, all the way up her leg until it found a place under her butt. She had such an amazing ass, he thought to himself as he felt her shape through her jeans. He stared into her eyes. God he wanted her so bad.

It had been almost three months since they last made love. That was an eternity for them. Especially since they couldn't seem to get enough of each other and hadn't gone more than three or four days without it since the first night they were together. But this was different. She had been hurt so badly and he didn't want to rush her. He knew that when she was ready it would happen and he was willing to wait patiently until that time. As hard as it was to wait. She was his world, his soul mate and the only woman he ever wanted to make love to for the rest of his life.

Elliot heard her moan as he realized that she had both of her hands under his shirt and was tracing his chest muscles with her fingertips. He leaned in to kiss her and she smiled at him, then they both laughed. He had never realized how much fun making out could really be. He felt like he was in high school again. Trying to get her to let him go just a little further than before.

Elliot slid his hand under her shirt. It was a bit of a task to do this and be smooth about it. She wore one of her soft fuzzy sweaters, it was baby pink and so soft and reminded him of cotton candy. But under that sweater she wore a white button down shirt. His first and second attempts at this maneuver had both failed as his hand ended up somewhere between the two shirts. He had been looking in her eyes and unable to reach his destination without visual contact.

Olivia laughed playfully as she felt his hand slide between the sweater and shirt and over the top of her bra. She reached up and took his hand as she pushed it down and out from between them. Then she stared him in the eyes and opened his palm placing it on her hip and guiding it under the this white button down shirt she wore. Elliot slid that hand behind her and smoothed it over the small of her back. He quickly moved his other hand in under the shirt, on the first try and caressed the warm skin of her belly. He walked his fingers up her side feeling her ribs, then slid his hand back to her belly once more. He raised the bottom of her shirt to kiss the soft skin he found there.

His favorite place to kiss laid just above her navel and was marked by a small heart shaped mole. Elliot found himself fascinated by it and drawn to it almost magnetically. He had discovered it once long before they were intimate. She had allowed him to rub cocoa butter over her belly while she was pregnant in an attempt to prevent stretch marks. It must have worked, because she did not have a single one on her flawless skin.

Without thinking he pushed his hands further up and under her bra cupping her left breast in his hand. His other hand now under her chin pulling her mouth to his. Olivia gasped the instant he placed his hand against her breast. But this wasn't a good gasp. She quickly reached under her shirt and pulled his hand out, then rolled out from under him and ran down the hall into the bathroom.

Elliot fell face first into the couch and just laid there for a moment trying to catch his breath and recover from the first contact inspired hard on he had had in quite a while. He laid there for a few minutes until it was safe to move again. Then rolled over and looked up at the ceiling. He could not believe he had just done that. He had gotten so wrapped up in the possibility of sex that he had practically dry humped her right here on the couch. No romance or taking it slow or the tender touch she needed right now. Just his erection hard against her leg at the first touch of her skin. What an asshole!

Elliot took a deep breath, then walked down the hallway into the bedroom and tapped lightly on the bathroom door.

"Liv? Honey, I'm sorry. Are you okay?"

He tried to listen to see if she was crying, but he didn't hear anything. After a few minutes he heard her soft sweet voice behind the door.

"I'm okay," she practically whispered. "Just give me a minute," she said softly.

Elliot waited outside the door for a few seconds then walked back out to the living room and waited for her on the couch. A couple of minutes later she walked back out and sat down beside him.

"Baby, I am so sorry." He said feeling so guilty. H reached over and put his hand in hers and waited for her to make the next move.

She looked at him with an almost frightened look and he cupped his hand and placed it against her jaw bone. He leaned in and kissed her softly. "I got carried away," he whispered. "I won't let it happen again."

Olivia exhaled heavily and looked down at the floor. "You didn't do anything wrong. I mean, everything you did, I wanted you to do. I guess, I just panicked. Elliot, I'm sorry." He watched her as a few tears started to fall from her eyes.

He slid in next to her on the couch and wrapped his arms around her. "Baby, it's okay. You're not ready." He laced his fingers in hers and kissed the top of her head, then looked into her eyes. "We will just wait until you are."

She looked at him for a minute then kissed him gently. "That's just it, El. I want to do this," she whispered as he brushed the tears from her cheeks.

"Now?" He asked feeling a little confused.

"Yes," she replied softly.

Elliot stood up and took her hand bringing her to her feet. He placed tow fingers under her chin and raised it to look into her eyes. "Are you sure?"

"Positive," she whispered kissing the palm of his hand.

Elliot wrapped his arms around her and leaned in to kiss her gently. She laced her fingers in his and stared into his eyes. "I want you to make love to me," she said softly. And she lead him slowly down the hallway and into the bedroom.

Standing there in the dark they put their palms together and gazed into each others eyes. Elliot leaned in and kissed her slowly and gently and passionately and caressed the side of her face with his hand. He backed her slowly up against the wall for a moment then pulled her back into his arms. Olivia broke their embrace only for a moment to raise the cotton candy pink sweater over her head and drop it to the bedroom floor. Then their lips pressed back together again.

Elliot pulled off his tee shirt and dropped it beside her sweater. He moved his hands slowly all over her body, it felt almost as if he had never held her before. He turned her around to face the wall, his hands still locked in hers. He braced them against the wall with their left arms as she guided his right hand under her blouse again slowly unbuttoning the bottom two buttons as she slid his hand over her belly and down to unbutton her tight jeans one button at a time. Elliot kissed her neck softly and tenderly as she moaned soft little moans against the side of his face.

He moved his hands back up her body over her clothes and unbuttoned the top two buttons of her shirt, leaving it held closed only by the three buttons in the very center of the blouse. He moved their hands slowly exploring her body and brought them to rest on her chin again as he turned her around and leaned her back against the wall to look into her eyes.

After a few seconds he leaned in to her as she pulled forward to press her mouth to his. She kissed down his shoulders and onto his chest as she moved her hands over his strong back muscles. Elliot moved his hands to her waist and slowly pulled down her jeans as she stepped out of them. Then looked back at him. He moved his hands around her hips to feel her butt again with both hands and she arched her back against the wall. Elliot moved his hands up her back under the shirt and unclasped her bra pulling it off. She laughed a little as it dragged against her belly tickling her. He stared into her eyes and pulled her into his arms holding her tight, almost as if he were dancing with her.

Olivia leaned her forehead in against Elliot's neck. As he backed up and turned laying her gently on the bed. He crawled onto the bed beside her still looking deep into her eyes as he slid his hand slowly up her knee and over the outside of her thigh. He rounded her thigh and moved his hands slowly across her belly once more as he kissed her the most intimate kisses she had ever felt in her life. He moved in over her body kissing and touching her gently all over her body. She pulled him close to her as she kissed him and felt herself reach to unbutton his jeans. Before long they ware in the floor as well.

Elliot kissed her passionately as he moved one hand up and unbuttoned the last three buttons on the white shirt. He laid beside her in the bed as he rolled her onto her stomach beside him. He continued kissing her as he traced his fingertips lightly along the back of her shoulders, then he moved his hand down her back pushing the shirt from her body and dropped it into the floor. Elliot slid in next to her and kissed her again as he caressed his hands over her bare back then trailed soft kissed down her spine to the small of her back.

Olivia stared at him and felt her heart pounding so hard in her chest she almost couldn't breathe as he placed his arm around her and moved her into his arms. She laid on her back staring up at him over her, she had never been more in love with anyone. She moved her hand down his chest and stared deep into his eyes. Elliot moved his hands up her hips sliding his fingers under the elastic band on each side of her bikini underwear and slid them down slowly as she raised her hips off the bed and he dropped them as well.

He felt her tremble just a little as he leaned in to kiss her and she slid down his boxers and pushed them off the edge of the bed with her foot. Now they laid there together surrounded by a sea of blankets and nothing between them but the evening air. Olivia's bottom lip quivered just a bit as Elliot slid his tongue into her mouth and the kisses began to heat up again. They both moaned a little as their hands explored body parts in the dark. Elliot raised up a little and moved her knees on each side of him. He kissed down her neck and across her collarbone as he ran his hand down the inside of her thigh.

"Are you ready?" He whispered.

"Yes," she breathed back to him staring into his eyes.

Elliot raised up gently and guided himself into her. Olivia gasped and he could see tears building up in her eyes.

"Are you okay?" He said softly.

"Yeah," she whispered.

He began to move slowly inside of her. She moaned softly for a minute and then began to gasp for breath. Elliot put his hand against the side of her face and stared into her eyes.

"I love you," he whispered as he leaned in and kissed her.

Olivia gasped again then buried her face into his chest and wrapped her arms around his neck as she broke down crying. She cried so hard she couldn't hardly breath. Elliot tried to comfort her as she gasped for breath.

"I am so sorry," she sobbed into his chest.

Elliot rolled over beside her in the bed and pulled her tight into his arms.

"It's okay baby. Your just not ready, yet." He whispered to her as he kissed the top of her head.

"Please don't leave me," she whispered through sobs.

"Olivia, I could never leave you," he said pulling the blankets up around them and holding her tight.

She placed her head softly against his chest and cried until she couldn't cry anymore. He just held her and let her fall apart in his arms.

About an hour later she laid peacefully against his chest. Elliot was certain she had fallen asleep. He moved a blanket up over her shoulders and softly kissed her forehead. She turned to look up at him.

"I love you," she whispered.

"I love you, too baby."

"Elliot?"

"Yeah sweetheart?"

She moved closer in to him as he tightened his grip on her, her head still resting against his chest.

"Stay with me," she said softly.

She seemed so afraid that he was going to leave her. "Always," he replied. He pulled his arms in tighter around her again. She moaned softly and nestled her cheek against his chest.

She ran her fingers between his and opened his palm as she laid hers against it.

"Just hold me and don't let go." She raised her head to look into his eyes.

All of her tears were gone now and all he saw was the love he knew reflected in his eyes as well.

"Never," he replied brushing her hair back with his thumb.

She smiled a warm smile and he kissed her gently. Then she settled back into his arms placing her head back in that exact same spot she always put it in.

"Liv?"

"Yeah?"

"Can I ask you something?"

"Anything."

Elliot tilted her chin until she was looking up at him. "You always fall asleep with your head in that same spot. What is so special about that particular spot?"

She smiled sweetly and laughed a little as she kissed him. "It's silly, really."

"What?"

"I can hear your heartbeat," she whispered. "And I know you are here with me while I sleep. It's comforting."

Elliot smiled at her.

"I told you it was silly."

"No baby, it isn't silly at all. I think that is the sweetest thing I have ever heard."

"Really?"

"Yeah."

"I love you."

"I love you, too my darling."

Olivia smiled at him then kissed him and settled back into her place in his arms with her head against his chest and with in moments had drifted off to sleep in his arms.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**Like It? Hate It? Leave Me A Review & Let Me Know!!!**

**I Don't Know What You Like If You Don't Tell Me! ; )**

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


	45. 45 Closer To You

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Forty Five: Closer To You)_

It was about three thirty I the next morning when Elliot felt her brush her nose softly against his chin. He opened his eyes slowly as he heard her moan softly. She gently kissed the side of his face and playfully bit his earlobe the way she had done so many times before when she couldn't sleep or would wake him up demanding attention. Olivia was infamous for this in their relationship. She would wake up at random hours of the night wanting to make love. This made him crazy, but he couldn't turn her down. He had actually grown quite used to it. But he honestly wasn't expecting anything like this after last night.

Olivia kissed around the side of his neck and onto his chest, before making her way up to his lips. Elliot opened his eyes to stare into hers as he combed his fingers through her hair and kissed her passionately. She felt his hand on her jaw as she laid across him her chest on his, the two of them tangled up in the blankets on the bed.

Elliot moved his hands slowly up her bare back as he pulled her chin back to look in to her eyes.

"You want to try this again?"

Olivia smiled at him and kissed him again. "Yeah," she said softly rolling over and pulling his arms around her waist.

"This is it?" He asked kissing her again.

"I think so," she whispered as he kissed across the top of her chest and she moaned softly.

"Liv, I want you to tall me if you want me to stop. Just tell me and I will."

"Okay," she whispered. She rolled onto her back and pulled him over her as they continued kissing and touching slowly and passionately.

"Baby," Elliot moaned into her neck, "just tell me when you are ready."

Olivia took a deep breath and moaned at his touch. "I'm ready," she said softly.

Elliot looked into her eyes and smiled at her, she smiled back a shy smile and he kissed her lips. "Okay," he whispered to her. He raised up a little looking down into her eyes and moved his thumb gently across her cheek. "I'm going to…"

Olivia nodded her head to him, she moved her hands over his chest as he slid his hand up her thigh and slid slowly inside her again. She looked into his eyes as she moaned just a little and wrapped her arm around his neck.

"Are you okay?" He asked.

"I'm good," she said softly smiling up at him.

"Yeah?" He asked.

"Yeah," she replied smiling at him again.

Elliot leaned in and kissed her once more, caressing he body as he moved slowly inside her. Olivia moved her knees in against his hips and slid her fingers down his back as she tipped her head back and moaned in enjoyment. This was it, it was finally happening for them.

Elliot concentrated on his movements inside her, making them strong and steady but smooth and slow at the same time. He wanted to do this exactly right so he was sure he didn't hurt or upset her. Olivia now stared deep into his eyes and he saw the fire that had burned there so long before.

He pulled her tighter against him and they made love and it was slow and sweet and sexy as hell. It was every thing it had ever been and more. It took a little longer than usual to get a response out of her, but he was patient with her. He wanted so badly to show her that with him sex was not something she ever had to be afraid of. That is could be good again. He passionately made love to her and when they were finished he pulled her tight into his arms once more as she rested her head against his chest still breathing heavy from her orgasm.

He held her as they slept together until the alarm clock went off at eight o'clock. Then they looked at each other lovingly and gave a repeat performance. Afterward Olivia laid there in Elliot's arms. He held her tight caressing her arm with his fingers.

"El?" she said softly as she gazed into his eyes.

"Yeah baby," he replied.

She rolled into him looking up at him and sat her chin against his chest. "I feel like I am closer to you than I have ever been."

"You think so, huh? I didn't think that was possible."

"Me either," she said kissing him. "I love you so much. Thank you for being so patient with me. You are so wonderful and sweet and I love you more than I ever thought I could love anyone. I never thought I could have this. Be this happy in a relationship. But with you being happy is easy. It's like breathing, it just happens I don't even have to try."

"You know I would do anything for you?" He asked tracing his finger over her lips.

"I know," she whispered.

"I live to make you happy. That was part of the deal."

"What deal?"

"I made a promise to God. If he would just let me be with you. I would spend every day of the rest of my life protecting you, taking care of you and making you happy. I needed you. I still need you. I love you baby."

Olivia smiled. "Sounds like a pretty big deal you have there."

"Yeah, see you really are stuck with me."

Olivia laughed and he pulled her close to him kissing her again. She glanced at the clock on the night stand beside the bed. "It's almost nine thirty. What time do you get the kids?" She asked.

"I need to get in the shower and head that way. You going with me?"

"No, I think I am going to stick around here and get a few more things done before they get here."

"I figured we would just keep them tonight since we didn't have them last night."

"It's probably better we didn't have them last night."

"You are probably right." They both laughed and he headed for the shower.


	46. 46 A Stabler Family Christmas

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Forty Six: A Stabler Family Christmas)_

Elliot entered the apartment followed by all five Stabler children. Olivia smiled as she watched them file into the apartment in amazement at all of the Christmas decorations and gifts under the tree. And little Eli who insisted on bringing the tree ornaments one at a time to show them to Olivia, placing each item in her hand and saying "that" as he pointed to it.

The children were ecstatic when Elliot broke the news of their engagement to them. Elliot and Olivia curled up together on the couch to watch as Maureen handed out the gifts and the children opened them. Eli, again being the one who had to be supervised as he decided that the pretty wrapping paper must taste as good as it looked. The kids loved their gifts, especially when it came time for the bigger gifts for the four older kids.

Elliot had decided to look into getting Maureen a new computer for school. When he and Olivia went to look at them she convinced him that would be the perfect for each of the four older children. Kathleen was in college now and the twins were in high school. Four different lap tops, one for each child and Elliot had never seen them happier.

"I told you," Olivia whispered into Elliot's ear as the screams of excitement echoed through the apartment.

"Yes, you did." Because they bought four, Elliot had gotten a discount on them from the electronics store. And they were the perfect gifts. Perfect for school, but also for music and videos and Dickie's video games. Olivia was brilliant. He sat thinking to himself. He would have been in so much trouble this year without her. Elliot stared at her as he watched her laughing and interacting with the kids. She was so good with them and they were crazy about her.

After the gift exchange they all went to dinner, then took the kids ice skating. On the way back to the car the crew broke out into a huge snow ball fight in the park that ended being Olivia and the girls against Elliot and the two boys. Elliot taught Eli how to pack and throw a snow ball.

They stopped by a little café to warm up with cocoa and coffee for a bit before taking the kids shopping. Before heading home they grabbed some pizza and a couple of movies from the video store. That evening, they all gathered around the table playing board games and telling funny stories from the past. The kids of course trying to embarrass their father in front of Olivia, then wanting to hear stories about when they met and cool things that had happened over the years they had worked together.

Maureen didn't spend the night, instead she headed back to her dorm to get some work done before her break was over. Elliot sat in the apartment with the other children while Olivia walked her out to her car and helped her carry out all of her gifts. Olivia jumped at the chance when Maureen asked for her help, because it gave them a little girl time alone to bond.

"I don't know if all of this stuff is going to fit into my car," Maureen joked as they both walked to the car with their hands full.

"We'll make it fit," Olivia replied.

They packed everything into the trunk of her Honda then stood to talk for a minute before Maureen left. Olivia had sensed this was what she wanted when she specifically asked for her help.

"Thank you Olivia, for everything."

"Well, you're welcome sweetheart." Olivia watched her and could tell there was something else on her mind.

"I mean for all of this, but also for being with dad. I have not seen him smile this much in a long time. You really make him happy. He really loves you." Maureen stopped and stared at Olivia for a moment.

"I really love him, too." Olivia replied.

"Look, I know five kids is a lot to handle. Especially if you aren't used to being around kids at all. And I grew up in this, trust me I know how overwhelming it can be sometimes."

"Honey, I …. Your father and I, love spending time with you kids. All of you. And I know you guys are growing up and these times of all of you together are going to get fewer and fewer over the next few years. You guys don't overwhelm me at all. I love being with all of you." Olivia watched the girl for a reaction.

"Really?" Maureen asked.

"Want to know a secret?" Olivia asked leaning in close as Maureen smiled at her. "I was an only child and never really had a family. I have always wanted a big family."

"Yeah?" Maureen asked.

"Yeah."

"Do you think you and daddy will have more kids together?"

"I don't know, really. I mean, I would love to. Someday. But for right now we have a wedding to plan. I was thinking you guys could help."

"Are you serious?" Olivia watched as Maureen's eyes lit up.

"Well, yes. I mean there is a lot we have to do. And I thought you girls could help me out. Kind of like a ladies thing. We have to pick out your bridesmaid dresses and I will need help picking out my dress. Guy's are not really that into wedding planning. So I'm going to have to depend on you girls quite a bit."

"You want us in the wedding?"

"Of course. Maureen, this wedding is not just about your dad and I coming together. It is about all of us. This ceremony is what is going to join the seven of us together as a family. I wouldn't get married if I couldn't have all of my family there."

Maureen looked up at Olivia and smiled then moved in to hug her. This was secretly what Olivia had wanted when she agreed to walk her out, but wanted Maureen to come to her. Olivia hugged her tight. "I love you, Olivia." She said softly still holding on to Liv.

"I love you too, honey." Liv replied kissing the top of Maureen's head.

"We all love you," she said smiling. "And I am glad that daddy found someone so nice that makes him so happy. I know this thing with mom hurt him, too. And I'm just happy that he can move on and finally be happy again. They hadn't been happy together in years. I don't remember the last time I heard him laugh or saw him smile before you came into the picture. He was miserable with mom. In the end they both were. Their break up hurt us all at first. But now, I don't know. It is like things are actually better than they were before. Mom and dad are both happier. And now we have you."

Olivia was trying not to blush. She could not believe the things she was hearing.

"I'd better get going," Maureen said opening the drivers side door.

"Be careful. You should come by more. Listen Maureen, if you ever need anything…"

"I know dad always tells me, if you need anything call me."

"Yeah," Olivia said with a smile.

"Bye, Liv."

"Bye."

Olivia waved to her as she pulled away and watched until she could no longer see the car. She really hated to see her go. She headed back inside as Elliot was making popcorn for the movie and the twins were arguing over what movie to watch.

Olivia walked over and sat down on the barstool and Elliot could see she looked a little distracted. He watched her for a moment until he caught her eye.

"Everything okay?" He mouthed without words.

Olivia smiled. "Wonderful," she answered softly. She stood up and walked around the counter to him. Elliot wrapped his arms around her pulling her to his chest and hugged her. Olivia stared up at him and smiled. "She hugged me and told me that she loved me," she said softly so the kids didn't hear their conversation.

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah."

"What did you do?"

"I told her I loved her. And hugged her. Then I told her I wanted them to help with the wedding planning. She was excited. She said she was glad to finally see you smile again. She is such a sweet kid, El. And so much like her father."

Elliot hugged Olivia tight. "Of course she is. She's daddy's little girl."

"She isn't so little anymore, Elliot. She's growing up."

"Yeah, they are all getting so big so fast." Elliot held her tight and kissed the top of her head as they watched the other four children playing in the living room floor.

That night as they tucked them all into bed Elliot watched Olivia and could tell exactly what she had on her mind. She was liking this mother stuff and he knew that it wouldn't be too long before they decided it was time to add another Stabler to their brood.

He sat in bed that night watching her as she combed her hair in front of the mirror in the bathroom that joined their bedrooms. Olivia smiled at him as she caught him watching her. She laid the brush down on the sink and walked slowly over to his bedside.

Elliot smiled as he looked up at her.

"What?" She asked leaning down to kiss him.

He leaned over and opened the drawer of the night stand. "I know we said we were going to wait and exchange our gifts later, but I can't wait anymore."

She smiled as she opened the box. It was a pair of diamond earrings and a matching pendant.

"They are beautiful," she said kissing him and he handed her another small package. Olivia laughed, it was another bottle of her perfume that he loved so much.

"Wait here," she whispered as she stood and walked into her room. She walked back through the bathroom closing her bedroom door behind her and handed him a box.

He opened it to find a watch and a shirt box. He slid the watch on and smiled as he picked up the shirt box. "You got me a shirt?"

"Just open it." She said staring at him.

Elliot opened the box and looked at the sexy lingerie that was inside. "This is for me?" He asked looking up at her.

"Well, it's for me. But I thought you might enjoy it too," she whispered.

Elliot picked up the gown and matching underwear and smiled as he looked back at her. "Okay, now you have to try it on."

Olivia laughed. "Give ma a minute," she said walking into the bathroom and closing the door.

Elliot had a pretty good idea this would get heated so he locked the bedroom door just incase, to keep the kids from walking in.

Olivia opened the bathroom door and walked seductively over to the side of the bed. She stood there looking down over Elliot as he admired her choice. He reached up slowly and ran his hand up her leg.

The gown was short, about the length of a mini dress and the skirt part was a sheer black material that you could see through. The bra like top was black and embroidered with white flowers and it had matching g-string underwear with little ties on the sides.

"Well, what do you think?" She asked with a smile, staring at him with her bedroom eyes.

"I think. Wow. Baby, I think you are in trouble." He said sliding his hand up her thigh and across her belly under the skirt and caressing her belly.

She lowered herself to her knees beside the bed. "I beg to differ, Detective Stabler. I think you are the one who is in trouble." She said with a sexy voice. She reached across his lap and unbuckled his belt then untucked his shirt from his pants and began to unbutton it. She leaned up to kiss him as his hands found themselves cupping her backside. She giggled slightly. And leaned her forehead into his chest.

"We should stop here," she said quietly. "And pick this up tomorrow night."

"What? Why?" Elliot stuttered then finally managed to spit out.

"Well, because there are four children sleeping down the hall that's why."

"So. Baby, Maureen is nineteen years old. Do you think we just didn't have sex after she was born? It can be done."

"I don't know. I don't think I could do it with the kids here."

"With my help I promise you could."

"Do you know how badly we would traumatize them if they heard us having sex?"

"So we wont let them hear us."

"What if I get loud?"

Elliot laughed. "Then I will cover your mouth with mine to muffle your screams of passion."

Olivia cracked up. "I don't know if I would exactly call them screams of passion. I'm not that loud am I?"

"No, actually, you're not. You are more of a soft sexy moaner, than a screamer. You are pretty quiet, even in your most intense moments you usually just moan and whisper to me. I love it!" He said and she smiled.

"I don't know, Elliot."

"Here," Elliot said picking up the remote control and turning on the television. "Now the volume of the TV will muffle our sex sounds. IF they hear anything it will be…." Elliot flipped through channels to find something with a lot of talking. "CSNBC! That is perfect! They never stop talking."

"We're going to have sex to the news?"

"Baby, I promise you, you will not be able to tell me a single thing they said on there when I am finished with you."

Elliot leaned in and kissed her lips. "Are you going to make me beg? I am not above that. Please," he mumbled against her neck.

Olivia giggled with the tickle of his words. "Okay," she whispered.

Elliot tossed her onto the bed and started kissing her entire body as he moved his hands over it. He then made his way back to her mouth.

"Elliot," she moaned as he kissed her. "Baby, this isn't working."

"What?" He asked.

"I can't concentrate with them talking about stocks and bonds and whatever."

Elliot reached his hand over her and grabbed the remote control turning the volume down where you could just hear the mumbling sounds but not make out the words they were saying. "Is that better?"

"Much," she said pulling him in to kiss her.

Within minutes Elliot had untied her underwear and they were laying in the floor beside the bed. Before long he was inside of her moving his hands under the almost non existent night gown. Olivia started to pull it off, but Elliot stopped her almost pleading with her to leave it on.

Things had just really started to get going good and they were both really feeling it when the kids began to fight in the next room.

Olivia moaned as Elliot stopped moving inside her. She panted as she looked up at him. "I'm going to kill them!" He said praying they would resolve it among themselves. It got quiet for a few seconds and they thought the cost was clear. "Back to business," Elliot joked as he focused once more on her body underneath his.

He had just enough time to get her moaning again and he heard Elizabeth scream. "DAD!!!! Dickie hit me!"

Elliot was determined and kept going. "El, the kids," Olivia gasped. "Elliot, I can't do this."

"Ignore them baby. They will either stop or they will kill each other."

She smiled at his determination, "Or they will wake Eli and we will all be up all night."

"Damn it!" He cursed leaning against her for a second. She was exactly right.

"DAD!!!!" Elizabeth screamed once more from the other room.

Elliot climbed from the bed and pulled on a pair of pajama pants and walked, uncomfortably down the hall way a feet to get on to the kids. Things seemed to calm down again and he returned a few seconds later dropping the pajama pants next to the bed and picking up exactly where he left off.

A few minutes later they were both starting to get close to something really good, when Dickie yelled out.

"Dad!!!! She won't leave me alone."

All he needed was a few more minutes. It was no use. Elliot had to put his pants back on and walk back to the bedroom door.

"Guys, Olivia is trying to sleep in the next room."

Olivia laughed into her pillow when she heard him say it. She could hear the kids arguing with him.

"Alright, Elizabeth go sleep in Maureen's bed. Good night guys! Don't you dare wake your brother up!"

Elliot walked back into the bedroom locking the door behind him. This time Olivia was sitting up in the bed and had covered herself with a sheet. He climbed into the bed beside her and kissed her.

"This really isn't going to happen tonight, is it?"

"I don't think so," she whispered.

"I'm sorry, that really ruined the mood."

"It's okay," she said softly. "We will just have to try again tomorrow night." She smiled at him and he kissed her. Tonight they were both left a little sexually frustrated.

"Now are you rethinking thinking that having more kids, thing?"

"No," she said with a smile. "But next time we will really have to make sure they are asleep first," Olivia said with a smile. "I'd better get back in to my room before we fall asleep together and the kids figure us out."

Olivia yawned and kissed Elliot goodnight. She took a deep breath and slid out of the bed picking up her panties from the floor before going back to her room for the rest of the night.

Back in her room she took off the night gown and slipped into tank top and a pair of flannel pajama pants and climbed into bed. She was wore out, it had been a really long day.


	47. 47 Making Plans

**-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

**Author's Note:**

**I know this chapter starts off a little dry at first, but stick it out there is some good stuff in it and some important things happen. It also sets some things up for future chapters. It is also a very long chapter. I decided not to break it to keep from having one entire chapter of the more boring stuff. It will get better, I promise! FEED BACK, PLEASE! **

**-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Forty Seven: Making Plans)_

The next few months passed quickly. Olivia had decided she wanted a summer wedding and they selected the first weekend in June. They had decided against a church ceremony. This was mostly because she was not a really religious person and Elliot's first wedding had been traditional Catholic ceremony, there was no way that was going to happen again. Elliot pretty much let her plan the event. And whatever she wanted, he was going to make sure she got. He wanted to make all of her dreams come true.

One night while lying in bed Olivia woke Elliot up, but it wasn't for her usual reason. She hadn't been able to sleep and had been thinking about the wedding. She had an idea.

"Liv, sweetheart," he groaned. "Are you sure this can't wait until morning?"

"Baby, please. I'm just nervous. I mean we are getting married in four months and we still don't even know where. I can't order invitations until we at least have a time and a plac…."

Elliot kissed her lips. Partially to quiet her and partially because she always looked so damn sexy when she was this nervous. "We'll figure it out," he said. "Tomorrow."

"I just want it to be nice, you know? I mean this is our wedding, Elliot. And the one and only time I will ever do this. I want to do it right. I want all of our friends and family to remember this forever. It is the celebration of our union as husband and wife. I just want it to be…… well, perfect."

Elliot sat up in the bed to give her his full attention and turned on the lamp on the night stand. "It will be baby. No matter where it is or who shows up or the color of the flowers or flavor of the cake. Because all of that stuff aside, you and I will walk away from that ceremony husband and wife. That makes it all perfect." Elliot laced his fingers in hers and kissed her hand.

"You are so sweet," she replied with a soft smile. "But that doesn't fix any of this right now."

Yeah, well it was nice while it lasted, the worried look on her face was back again. Elliot pulled her into his arms cupping his hand and using it to bring her head to rest against his chest. "Okay, tell me your idea of your dream wedding." He said looking at her.

She looked at him half annoyed. She wasn't sure he wasn't mocking her and felt like she wasn't getting any help what so ever from him.

"Come on." He said waiting for her answer.

She took a deep breath and scrunched her nose as she thought about it for a minute. Unlike pretty much every other member of the female population, she had never really been one to fantasize about her wedding day. Infact, truth be told she had never really ever thought about marriage or children until Elliot came into her life. Somewhere between her little crush on him and seeing him with his children was when she even decided she wanted a family. She had never really thought about the details of the actual wedding. They still were not even sure who their wedding party was. The kids of course. And she wanted Casey as her Maid of Honor, seeing as that was pretty much her only female friend. The truth was there really wasn't anything traditional about this wedding at all.

She looked up at Elliot, "I don't know. I want the kids in the wedding and Casey and whoever you choose for a best man. I think I'm just going to walk myself down the aisle."

"What?"

"Well, it isn't exactly like my father is an option, Elliot. I thought about asking Cragen, but I'm not sure he would be into this."

"I think it is a great idea."

"You do?"

"Well…. Yeah. I mean he has sort of been like a guardian to you these last several years. And he is the one who paired us up in the first place, technically, there would be no wedding if he hadn't been there. I think it is perfect."

"You think he will go for it?"

"Baby, you are like a daughter to him. It is like all of the boys out here stirring up trouble. And then you. We are all like family, Liv. And he is always watching over you. All of us, but especially, you."

She smiled. "I will ask him."

"What about you?"

"I'm the groom. And I'm not trading places with anyone," Elliot joked.

"You know what I mean, El. Any candidates for best man, yet?"

"I was thinking Fin. I mean, he is close to us both. And in four months, when I step down as your partner, I will be handing you over to him. If I can trust him with my life and the life of my wife, I can count on him to stand up with me at my wedding, right?"

Olivia smiled again.

"Of course then I might piss John off and I am stuck working with him for the next, God knows how many years. Hearing all of his stories about government conspiracy and blah, blah, blah. And I'm sure he will never let me forget I chose Fin as my best man."

"Sounds like you have a problem."

"No, they are both great guys. And I would be honored to have either of them. But I have known Fin longer, worked with him more and I'm about to trust him with the most important thing in my life." He stared into her eyes. "I want Fin."

"Okay," she said as she opened the drawer beside her side of the bed and pulled out a note pad and pen to jot all of this down before she forgot. "It sucks."

"What sucks?"

Olivia pulled her knees up to her chest in the bed and looked lovingly at him. "That after eleven years together as partners, we wont be able to work together anymore."

Elliot rubbed her back. "It will be okay. They just can't let us be partners because it is a conflict of interest. Or some other….whatever. Basically, they are afraid that if they keep us paired together we will be worried about each other too much and not focusing on the job. I guess I can kind of understand the point. They wanted to split us up completely, we are not even supposed to be in the same department. Some of the higher-ups were leaning toward putting you back in computer crimes. You made a good impression on them, I guess. Cragen went to bat for us. And this is what he got. We will still see each other all of the time and at least I know I can trust Fin to watch your back. And I know you trust him. If I have to give up my partner, at least I know she is well taken care of. Yes baby, it sucks. But we are giving this up to move forward to our life together. We're trading up, here. And if you ask me, it is one hell of a deal. I can't complain. I get to spend forever with you here in my arms."

Olivia leaned in to him and hugged him. "I know, I'm just really going to miss having you there with me."

"It will work out," he said kissing her. "Okay, what is our next order of business for wedding plans?"

"We need a place." She said softly. "I was thinking with it being summer outdoors would be pretty. Like somewhere outside the city."

"What about Cragen's cabin? He has all of that property there on a lake. It is out of town. We could go out and look around and bring stuff in to set up whatever we want."

"It would be a big enough space. And we could use the actual cabin to get ready. And it would save the money of renting a place."

"We could just get a keg of beer and a DJ and have the reception there as well. There is a little town a few miles up the rode with a hotel. That way people aren't drinking and celebrating then heading back into the city. Any honeymoon ideas?" Elliot smiled at her.

"I have not thought that far in advance. You?"

"Oh, I have ideas."

She laughed. "El, focus. It doesn't have to be anything big and fancy, I just want to be able to have time alone with you. No distractions or disruptions. Just us."

"You know, when I took the kids to get the Christmas tree. We passed this little bed and breakfast just across the state line. I remember thinking I wanted to take you there. It was quiet and romantic, perfect place to sneak off for some alone time and relax."

"Sounds perfect. Then maybe we could save the big getaway for our first anniversary. We just have so much money and stress tied up already between Christmas and everything for the wedding…..if we do a big honeymoon that is just one more thing to stress about."

"So, put that on your list and I will call and make a reservation tomorrow. I will talk to Cragen about the cabin and maybe we could go out and take a look at the property tomorrow and see if that is something we are interested in."

"If we can get that detail taken care of then I can at least get the Invitations and R.S.V.P cards ordered. Those take four weeks to come in. We need to get them out as soon as possible. Guest list. Do you have your part of the addresses ready?"

"They are in my computer. I will print them and get them to you."

She smiled. "You have more done on this that I thought."

"What? Do you think I have just been slacking all of this time?"

"I have an appointment to look at dresses on Saturday. I need to call Casey and the kids and make sure that day is good for everyone. I really want them all in on this."

"You are going to take Casey and three teenaged girls into a bridal shop to pick out dresses?"

"Baby, this is a big day for them too! I want everyone involved. Plus, they have to wear the dresses, they should have a say in them. And I need opinions on my dress also."

"I thought you already had yours?"

"Well, not exactly. I kind of know what I want. Sort of. But I want to try some things on and I want them to help me pick one. Then we have hair and nail appointments. Shoes and jewelry." She stopped and looked at Elliot. "Oh, I found a place that can order the boys tuxedos' to match yours."

"Even Eli?"

"Yup."

"That will work. I will call and see if I can get an appointment for me and the boys to go in and get measurements done this week or next week. Pick something out. I already went in and ordered the wedding bands that match your ring, they will be in in about two weeks. And spoke to the preacher who did the baby's baptism. I think since we are not taking the Catholic route, he would be good for the job. And we kind of already know him from before." Elliot kissed the top of her head as he took a deep breath. "Now do you feel better about the wedding plans? I know we still have a lot to do, but we do at least have some ideas. And I am not dumping this all on you. I just want this to be everything you want. So anything you want, anything you think of, tell me and I will find a way to make it happen. If you need help with anything, let me know." He kissed her forehead again. "All better, now?"

"Yes," she whispered as he reached over and turned out the light. She settled in against his chest for a few minutes then sighed.

"What baby?" Elliot asked her.

"Well," she said quietly. "I was just thinking….since we are awake anyway." She pressed her nose against his ear and he smiled. "Maybe we could get in a little practice for the honeymoon," she whispered into his ear.

"I thought you would never ask," he said with excitement as he pulled her in against him and rolled over onto her in the bed. He playfully kissed the side of her neck causing he to burst out into laughter.

"El, that tickles." She squealed as he kept at it.

"I know! Maybe you will think about that the next time you wake me up in the middle of the night!" He made a growling sound then settled his mouth in against hers calmly kissing her lips. "I love you so much," he whispered to her.

She smiled as she stared up at him, "I love you, too."

The next afternoon Olivia and Elliot went to select their invitations and select their cake. They went out to Cragen's Cabin and walked around the place. Olivia still wasn't exactly convinced until they stood together next to the lake and watched a beautiful sunset.

"This is it," she said to Elliot placing a kiss on his lips.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"You want to get married at sunset?" He asked.

"No, but I do have an idea. Get married at night."

"What?"

"Yeah. I think it would be pretty. Decorate the entire place up with those white Christmas lights and candles. It will put a soft romantic glow on the place and reflect really pretty off the lake. Have the wedding ceremony at like eight o'clock, then follow with the reception."

"Honey, nobody gets married at night."

"I know, I think that's why I like it. It will be our little thing."

"If that's what you want, that's what we will do."

So they did. Four months later everyone gathered around the lake at Cragen's cabin to watch as Elliot and Olivia exchanged vows.

Captain Don Cragen escorted Olivia down the aisle to give her away to Elliot. As he walked with her, his mind wondered back to just over eleven years ago when he escorted her into the room and introduced her to Elliot for the first time.

He had chosen Elliot, because he knew that he would look after her and protect her. Elliot was a man who took his responsibilities seriously. Cragen knew that some of the other guys would not take her seriously as a partner because she was a woman. She was an attractive woman, the reason he didn't trust a few of the other guys to work with her. Elliot was married with children, she would be safe with him. And he would respect her.

It's funny how that worked out, he thought to himself as they stood in front of everyone and he passed her off to Elliot. The same Elliot, who in moments would be her husband. Cragen was happy to see this finally happen for her, for them.

Olivia would never admit it aloud, but she always felt this need to be loved, truly and unconditionally. And this is what she found with Elliot. The two of became fast friends. And for years, years before anything had happened between them romantically, Cragen had watched the two of them wondering and waiting to see if something would develop. It seemed predestine, a force of fate and somehow he knew no matter what the world did to fight this, they would have found their way together.

He watched as Elliot took her hands in his and gazed into her eyes repeating his vows. Olivia smiled her sweet smile and nodded her head as she said her "I do." They couldn't take their eyes off each other. This was real love, Cragen thought to himself. He had seen it before. Forty years ago, in a little church a few miles away when he and the love of his life exchanged vows. He lowered his head for a second and cleared his throat as tears raised in his eyes. Times like this made him miss her more than ever.

Elliot stared deep into her eyes as tears welled up in his. He could not believe this day was finally here. His heart pounded and everyone and everything around them seemed to disappear. It was like they were the only two people in the world.

He held her hand in his and laced his fingers with hers the way he had done a thousand times before. He thought about how beautiful she looked today. She was beautiful every day, but the way she looked today with the way she glowed and shined and smiled uncontrollably she was the most beautiful site he had ever seen. She wore her hair pinned partially up and curled with some hanging down in the back. Her eyes sparkled in the soft glow of the little white lights and candles around them. She wore a gorgeous white gown. The bodice was cut straight across her chest, showing just a hint of cleavage. It was hand beaded with tiny little iridescent beads and the thin spaghetti straps crossed over her back. The back of the dress dipped low showing off her back and the skirt was long and flowing and dragged the ground behind her. She looked so sexy and so elegant. Elliot had to keep reminding himself to breathe, he was so lost in her eyes. He took a deep breath of the summer nights air and was surrounded by the scent of her perfume, the perfume he had gotten her for Christmas. She wore her diamond pendant he bought her and a pair of long dangly diamond earrings. Elliot smiled, confident that every man here was thinking how lucky he was. He took a deep breath and felt her squeeze his hand gently as she smiled at him.

"Elliot," the preacher repeated "you man now kiss your bride."

Olivia smiled a sexy smile as he leaned in and wrapped his arms tight around her waist. He cupped his hand on the side of her face and tilted his head as he kissed her intimately, sweetly, their first kiss as husband and wife. Olivia's hand slid gently up to the side of his face and she closed her eyes. The moment was magic. They could hear everyone around them clapping and reacting. But he didn't take his eyes off hers. He traced her lips with his thumb and pulled her in for another kiss. She leaned in to him and he wrapped his arms around her tight and kissed the top of her head. They turned to face the crowd of family and friends as the preacher made his announcement.

"Ladies and Gentlemen. I would like to introduce to you, Mr. and Mrs. Elliot Stabler!"

Elliot smiled and Olivia laughed as she threw her arms around him. "It's over now," she whispered trying to calm his nerves as she pressed her forehead to his.

"No baby," he said placing his hand softly against her face, "it's just beginning." Olivia felt a tear roll off her cheek and took a deep breath. "Are you okay?" Elliot asked.

"Yeah," she whispered. "I have never been so happy in my life, Elliot."

"Neither have I," he replied placing another soft kiss against her lips.

There was a big reception around the lake that night. A lot of dancing and celebrating. The kids all stayed until about ten o'clock when Eli fell asleep and Maureen drove them all home.

The party continued until about two in the morning. It was almost three o'clock before they had gotten the mess picked up and decided to spend the night at the little hotel up the road tonight and head on to the bed and breakfast in the morning.

Olivia waited in the car, still in her wedding, dress while Elliot got them checked in. He got the key and walked over to the passengers side of the car to help his new wife out of the car. They were both exhausted and still a little intoxicated from all of the beer and champagne at the reception. Elliot carried her over the threshold of the hotel room and placed her gently onto the bed.

"Finally," he said as he turned to close the door.

"Finally, what?" She asked taking off her two hundred dollar strappy heels that she had to have because they matched her dress perfectly. But no one saw them anyway because the dress was so long.

"Finally, you are mine. You are my wife. I am your husband," he said laying across the bed beside her, "and you are my wife." Elliot reached over and laced his fingers between hers again looking into her eyes.

Olivia smiled at him.

"I have something for you," he said with a child like grin.

Elliot stood up and walked across the room opening his overnight bag. He returned to sit beside her on the bed handing her the first of two envelopes. Olivia's eyes lit up as she stared at him and opened it.

"Two plane tickets to Miami?" She looked at him and smiled wondering what was going on. "Baby, what is in Miami?" She asked as she bit her bottom lip thinking the retirement capital of the United States didn't exactly make her top ten list of most romantic honeymoon destinations.

"The boat," he said handing her the second envelope.

"What boat?" She asked as she opened the second one pulling out two more tickets.

"The cruise ship that is taking us to the Bahamas for our honeymoon."

Her eyes lit up and she laughed as she smiled at him. "Are you serious?"

"Yes, I'm serious." He said kissing her.

She squealed in excitement. "When?"

"We have to be at the airport to check in at eight o'clock tomorrow morning."

"Oh baby," she said placing her hands on the side of his face and kissing him.

"Did I do good?" He asked.

"You did so good," she said rubbing her nose against his. "But I'm not packed for it."

"I packed you a bag. You can go through it in the morning. Anything you need, we'll buy."

"Elliot, you are so amazing! What about the reservation at the bed and breakfast?"

"I never made it. I wanted something more for you, this is our honeymoon! I didn't want to spend it in New Jersey. I can take you there some other time. I wanted something great for the honeymoon. So I saw a travel agent and I thought a cruise would be perfect."

"It is!"

"My gift to the most amazing wife in the world."

"I have only been your wife for," she looked at his watch, "seven hours and thirty two minutes!"

"Yes, but they were an amazing seven hours and thirty two minutes."

Elliot leaned back against the headboard and she snuggled in against him. He put his arm around her and just held her for a minute.

"Everything turned out so beautiful," he said. "And we got some good pictures of us with all of the kids."

"You scared me for a minute. I wasn't sure you were going to go through with it," she said as she laid her cheek against his chest and studied her wedding set on her finger.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, he said kiss the bride and you just stood there. I thought my heart would explode. I looked at you and you had tears in your eyes, but you didn't move. I was so afraid you were about to call it off or something."

"God, No. I was just a little nervous. Then I looked into your eyes and I guess I kind of zoned out."

"I squeezed your hand and the preacher repeated himself, then it was like you woke up. You leaned in and kissed me. That was the best kiss of my life," she said.

"Mine, too." Elliot pulled her in to hug her tight. He leaned in to kiss her lips and all of a sudden they could hear the most awful noise.

Someone in the room next to theirs was having incredibly noisy sex.

"Oh my God," Elliot said as the woman on the other side of the wall called it out at the same time.

Olivia began to laugh and buried her face in Elliot's shirt.

"You think this is funny?" He asked pointing to the wall behind their headboard.

Olivia was laughing so hard she would hardly breathe and couldn't stop.

"It's going to be a long night," Elliot mumbled as the couple next door continued making loud sex noises.

Olivia laid on the bed and smiled at him. "Do you want me to call the front desk and get us moved?"

"No use, this was the last room. They were booked for a wedding." Elliot grinned a sarcastic grin.

Olivia sat up and pressed her ear to the wall.

"What are you doing?"

"Listening," she replied.

"Why on earth would you want to do that?"

"I wonder who it is," she said sliding her ear along the wall. She sat back on the bed to think about it. "Who had that room?"

"I don't know, Liv."

Just then they heard a loud moan from the woman. Elliot winced and covered his ears.

"Casey," Olivia said with a look in her eyes like she just had a brilliant idea. "Oh," she began to laugh again as the woman continued her noises. "Does that sound like Casey?" She pressed her ear to the wall again.

"I don't know Liv, I have never heard Casey make those noises, Thank God!"

"That was Casey's room, I remember. I came here with her this morning to get the key. John has the one next to it and Fin is on the other side of his." She listened at the wall for a few more minutes. "I wonder who she's with."

"I really don't care," Elliot replied really starting to get annoyed with the situation and Olivia's complete fascination with it. "She had a date at the wedding."

"No, they got in a fight and he left."

"Well, apparently they made up baby."

"Oh, no. She is done with him. Who could it be?"

"Honey, I'm pretty sure we don't want to know!"

"I can't hear him," Olivia said pressing her hear harder against the wall.

"Liv, please. It is bad enough we have to hear it at all!" She turned her head to look at Elliot. She smiled and sat back down beside him in the bed. She laid her head against his chest and kissed him slowly.

Elliot laid her back in the bed. He focused on the beautiful woman laying under him and tried to block out Casey's screams of passion from the room next door. Olivia smiled up at him and unbuttoned his shirt running her hands over his chest. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him to her and kissed him passionately.

"Hey, she whispered. What do you say we show them how it's done?" She winked up at Elliot.

"You think we can top that? You are kind of quiet."

"I don't have to be. If you give me a little inspiration…. I am sure I could do much better than that."

"Oh," he said kissing her.

The man in the next room moaned. And Olivia giggled into Elliot's chest.

"Baby, focus." Elliot said leaning in to kiss her again.

"Oh, John!" Casey screamed from next door.

"Oh Joh… Oh my God!" Elliot said and Olivia cracked up again.

"Go Casey!" She said as she gasped for breath only to burst into laughter again. She was laughing so hard it was shaking the bed and she was starting to cry. She sat up and continued to laugh almost falling out of the bed.

"That is sick! What the hell is she thinking."

Olivia gave him a look and bit her tongue.

"Don't you dare!" He said pointing at her knowing she had a smart comment just itching to come out of her mouth and it would only make the situation worse.

"Well, she had quite a bit to drink tonight." Olivia assured him.

"Yeah, but John? That is disgusting! He is almost old enough to be her father!"

"No he isn't. Besides, some women like older men. You are older than me. And why shouldn't they be happy?"

"I am four years older than you! And baby, I don't care if they are happy. As long as I don't have to hear it!" Elliot honestly thought he might be sick.

Olivia giggled a little and crawled over to him. "You need something to take your mind off of it," she said pulling him onto the bed over her and unbuttoning his pants..

They began kissing again and just as Olivia thought it might happen, Elliot stopped and buried his face into the pillow beside her. "I'm sorry baby, I can't."

Olivia groaned. "You are kidding me?"

"No, no, no. This is making me think very bad thoughts about sex. I feel champagne and wedding cake rising in the back of my throat. This is really traumatizing."

"Baby, it is our wedding night."

"I can't Liv."

"So lets go home! I will even drive." She jumped from the bed and started to put her shoe back on as she lifter her skirt with one hand and hopped in a circle on one foot to keep her balance.

"Honey, I can't. And it is after four in the morning and we have both been drinking, if we drive back to the city now we will have a really nice night in jail. Let's just try to get some sleep."

Olivia exhaled and kicked her shoes across the room as she lifted her skirt and crawled back onto the bed. Elliot reached for the remote and turned on the television.

"I thought you wanted to sleep?"

"I do, but I don't want to dream about John and Casey having sex!" He handed the remote to Olivia and she found one of her favorite old movies. Elliot pulled her tight to him and held her in his arms.

"I will make it up to you," he whispered as he kissed her forehead.

"You better Stabler," she said looking at him and kissing him back. "I'm going to kill Casey!" She grumbled as she laid her head against his chest.

"Why? I thought you were happy for them?"

"I was, am. But I'm still going to kill her! She's having sex on my wedding night and I'm not."

"Honey, her having sex on your wedding night, it the reason you're not."

"My point exactly! She's owes me BIG TIME!"

"If we go to sleep ten minutes ago, we can sleep for about two hours before we have to leave for the air port."

"Elliot, I love you." She said softly. "Thank you so much for everything."

"You are very welcome. I love you, too."

"Today was the happiest day of my life. And that was the most beautiful wedding I have ever seen. The kids looked great. And you were so sexy in your tux. The way you stared into my eyes the entire ceremony. It took everything I had in me to keep from kissing you before he told us to. I can't wait to spend forever with you."

"Me either baby," Elliot looked into her beautiful brown eyes and softly touched the side of her face then kissed her lips gently. She yawned and her heavy eyes closed as she laid her head back down against him, still in her white gown. He kissed the top of her head and whispered, "goodnight my angel," as his wife slept in his arms.


	48. 48 Off To A Rough Start

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Forty Eight: Off To A Rough Start)_

The next morning Olivia awoke to a crash of thunder. She sat up in the bed and scratched her head for a moment squinting her drowsy eyes. She looked at the alarm clock on the night stand flashing twelve o'clock.

"Oh my God!" She yelled as she leaped from the bed and ran frantically around the room gathering their things.

Elliot sat up and looked at her for a moment forgetting about their prior engagement. He watched her with a confused look on his face as she began to riffle through the bag he had packed her pulling out clothes. His eyes followed her in amusement as she unzipped the long beautiful dress and stepped out of it, leaving the dress standing alone in the floor from all of the ruffled netting underneath it. She slid into a pair of jeans and a tank top and tossed his bag to him as she dug for shoes.

"Shoes, Elliot?" She almost snapped at him still sitting in the bed. She looked up at him. "Baby, did you pack me any shoes?"

"Oh yeah, they are uh…" Elliot scratched his head for a minute. "In the car."

Olivia exhaled slowly and turned to look out the window as the rain poured heavily down the outside of the glass. She then turned her attention to her perfect two hundred dollar heels. "No way in Hell," she mumbled as she shook the thought from her mind.

Elliot stood up and pulled his clothes from his bad then stood beside the bed changing clothes as she neatly tucked her wedding dress and heels into a garment bag. Elliot looked down at his watch, "it's seven thirty eight. If we hurry…." He looked up at Olivia who had tears welling up in her eyes. "We'll be okay, baby. The boat doesn't actually leave out until tomorrow afternoon. We can catch a later flight if we miss this one." He placed his thumb on the side of her face and kissed her lips. "I love you. I am going to make this happen. I promised my wife a cruise in the Bahamas and she is going to get one."

Olivia looked up at him and smiled through tears. "I love you," she whispered and he kissed her again.

Elliot took a deep breath and looked out the window at the car across the parking lot and the rain was not letting up. "Okay, here's my plan. I will take the keys and run out to the car and pull it up for you. I will bring your shoes back here and load this stuff while you put them on." He looked around the room. "Baby, everything is going to get soaked. I'm not worried about all of this stuff, it will dry. But your dress will get ruined."

Olivia sat on the edge of the bed and held the garment bag. This wasn't just a dress. This was her seven and a half thousand dollar designer wedding gown. "No, it is not!" She said standing up, tucking the bag under her arm and storming out the door.

Elliot watched her as she walked barefoot to the room next door and beat on it like she was executing a search warrant. "Honey, what are you doing?"

"Recruiting my Maid of Honor for duty," she said as she pounded on the door once more.

Moments later a half a sleep and obviously hung over Casey Novak opened the hotel room door wrapped in a sheet. "Liv," she said with a confused look on her face, "what are you doing here? I thought you were supposed to be in Jersey."

"Change of plans Case. Look, I need a favor."

"Sure, but can I put some clothes on first?"

"That can wait, this will only take a second." Olivia watched Casey try to keep the door pulled shut behind her without completely exposing herself wrapped only in a bed sheet to the rest of the hotel guests. "I need you to take my dress for me until I get back. It's pouring rain and it will be ruined if I try to load it now. We have to get to the air port."

"Since when do you need a plane to get to Jersey, Liv?"

"Like I said, change of plans. We're not going to Jersey, but I don't have time to explain. I will call you later. There is a…. something I want to talk to you about anyway."

"Okay, sure."

Olivia handed Casey the garment bag and she ducked back inside. "Thanks Casey!"

"Bye Liv."

"By Casey," Olivia said with a mischievous look on her face as she turned to go. "Bye John!"

Casey looked mortified.

Olivia dashed back to her own room as Elliot stood in the door laughing. "I love you so much!" He said as he kissed her when she entered the room. She chuckled.

"You should have seen the look on her face."

"I would have loved to, but then I would have had the site of her in that sheet stuck in my head even longer and that is just not natural."

"My God Elliot, you talk about her like she awful or something."

"No, baby. Casey is an extremely attractive woman. It's just that she is a close friend and not someone I am comfortable seeing or hearing or even thinking about like that. And she is obviously very disturbed when it comes to choosing her sexual partners."

Olivia just stared at him. "You are thinking about this way too much, Elliot. Let it go." She kissed his lips. "The only woman you should think about when sex crosses your mind in any way, is your wife."

Elliot grabbed her face and kissed her. "You are absolutely right." He stared out the door into the rain and hit the hit the unlock button on the keychain. "Here we go," he said as he ran across the parking lot and jumped into the car.

He pulled the car up and ran back to bring Olivia her shoes. He was soaked already. "What about the key?" She asked looking out into the rain.

"Leave it on the night stand, housekeeping will get it when they come in to clean."

Olivia dropped the key and slid her bag over her shoulder.

"You ready, baby?" Elliot said grasping her hand in his.

"Yeah," she said as they both ran to the passengers side of the car and he opened the door for her and held her bag as she climbed inside. The rain was like ice and they were both drenched and freezing.

Olivia sat in the seat trembling as he backed out of the parking lot and headed for the city to the airport. Elliot reached over and turned on the heat for her. He looked back at Olivia and smiled.

"What?" She asked at his strange expression.

"Obviously you are cold," he said as she looked at him confused. Elliot nodded his head toward her and she looked down at her shirt.

"Oh my god," Olivia exclaimed grasping her soaked chest and hardened nipples through her white tank top.

"Don't be so embarrassed, babe. I have seen them before."

Olivia reached over and hit him in the stomach with one hand. She grabbed her bag and began to dig through it to find a better shirt. "All you packed were tank tops?"

"It's the Bahamas sweetheart, I didn't think you would need much else."

"That's great, El! We were supposed to be at the air port twenty minutes ago, our plane leaves in forty five minutes and I'm going to strut through airport security looking like a porn star!"

"You look hot."

She shot a glare at him from across the car. Her hair was soaked and all dark and wavy. The rain drops beaded up on her skin and her white tank top, with the built in shelf bra was nearly invisible it was so wet. She looked like a gorgeous porn star. Elliot had just started to fantasize when he noticed her frown.

"I'm sorry baby. Here," he said reaching behind the seat and handing her his bag, "get one of my shirts and pull it on over that."

She dug through his bag and pulled out a tee shirt pulling it over her soaked clothes.

"We can change on the plane," Elliot said smiling at her.

Olivia opened the mirror on the visor and messed with her hair. She hadn't managed to get quite all of the pins out from the night before and had this image of herself getting caught in airport security and having to be strip searched because of a damn hair pin. She tossed them one by one into the ashtray in the car then ran her fingers through the wet ratted mop that now took residence on top her head. She opened her purse and pulled put a small brush and a hair tie. Elliot watched as she brushed through her hair and pulled it neatly back putting every strand into place.

She turned herself in her seat to watch him as he drove. She smiled as she reviewed the events of their day so far in her mind. He was so sweet to her. He stood in the pouring rain just to hold the car door for her and help her inside. And he gave her his shirt and turned on the heat so she wouldn't be cold. He had secretly planned an amazing romantic honeymoon to surprise her. And he was the most stunningly attractive man she had ever laid eyes on. He was a keeper. She thought to her self with a smile. She turned and slid over next to him in the seat and laid her head on his shoulder.

"I love you," she said softly.

Elliot put one arm around her and kissed the top of her head. "I love you too, baby."

They arrived at the air port minutes later, only to find that their flight had been cancelled due to the storm and the next flight out was not scheduled to leave until that afternoon. They dug through their bags and changed clothes. Then Elliot bought his new bride a romantic breakfast in the food court as they sat on a bench together watching the morning news. Elliot watched her as she put the last bite of her blueberry bagel to her lips and took a sip of coffee. She was so tired and fighting to stay awake.

Elliot reached out and put his arms around her waist pulling her body in against his chest and holding her tight. She looked up at him and he stared into her eyes. Olivia leaned he head back against him and exhaled softly. He loved the way she felt in his arms. Like she had been carved from the material that had once filled the space there and she fit so perfectly. They were made to fit together, in every way. Holding a woman had never felt this natural to him, not even with Kathy.

"Honey," he said softly to her, "why don't you close your pretty eyes and try to get a little sleep. I will watch our stuff. We have at least two more hours before we can even board the plane."

"I'm okay," she said with a yawn. "And within minutes she had fallen asleep in his arms.

Later as their flight finally took off and they were safely in the air. Elliot looked at her sitting against the window looking out into the clouds. It was sunny now and it appeared as is they were soaring through Heaven as the plane continued to elevate until all of the fluffy white puffs were now far below them.

Olivia turned to look at him and gave him a sexy smile. "I love you so much. I cannot believe we are finally on our way to our honeymoon."

"Well," Elliot said raising an eyebrow at her and caressing her hand with his finger. "We could start the honeymoon a little early."

Olivia gave him a strange look of confusion.

Elliot leaned in and whispered in her ear, "Would you like to become a member of the mile high club?" He smiled, sure she would be up for it.

But she just stared blankly back at him. "You are serious?"

"Well, yeah. Don't tell me as many times as you have flown you have never thought about it. Or are you already a member?"

"No, no and no." She said sharply and turned to gaze out her window again.

Elliot ran his finger under the strap of her, now green tank top and caressed her shoulder.

"I can't believe you." She said obviously pissed off as she turned to look at him.

Elliot just looked at her and shook his head unsure of what exactly it was that he had done.

"You won't make love to me in hotel room because somewhere someone else is having sex and you find it disturbing. But you want to know if you can fuck my brains out in a four by four bathroom stall on an air plane!?!"

Oh shit! Elliot thought, he fucked up! He stared at her unsure of what to say to make it better.

"Elliot, I don't want the first time I make love to my husband to be while he is slamming me up against a portable toilet and we're wondering if the door will burst open at any second. I want it to be romantic."

"I'm sorry. I was just playing around, I mean I guess I was a little serious. But it was a stupid thing to say and you are right."

She leaned her head against his shoulder and he kissed her lips. He stared lovingly into her eyes. "Ask me again on the flight home," she said giving him a wink. Elliot smiled at her and they both laughed.

"You know we would cause a plane crash, right?"

"Probably, the way this trip is going so far that would be our luck."

Elliot placed a kiss between her eyes. "I promise, from this point out, I will do everything I can to make this a really good honeymoon."

"It already is, El." He kissed her forehead and then her lips as she smiled and leaned her head against him.

They slept with their heads leaned in together for the rest of the three hour flight.


	49. 49 The Honeymoon

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Forty Nine: The Honeymoon)_

Minutes after getting checked into their hotel in Miami they had dropped their belongings and sprawled out across the bed together. Olivia sat straddled over Elliot's waist and had unbuttoned his shirt and began to kiss and lick her way over every inch of it. He knew this game. She was going to taunt him and tease him for a while only to end up the one who was begging him not to stop later. He was game. Right now he was so horny he would give it to her any way she wanted it.

She had just made it down and began to unzip his pants when Elliot felt his stomach begin to churn. He groaned and Olivia looked up at him. "No, baby. You're good."

Olivia pulled his pants off and moved her way back up to kiss his lips. She gave him passionate, intimate kisses then placed his hands on her waist as she unzipped her jeans and slid them off. She laid across him wearing nothing but the little green tank top and bikini underwear. Elliot felt her flat stomach as it pressed against him. She kissed and bit gently at his neck and suddenly a vision of her in the car in the soaked see through white tank top and her hair all wet and wild flashed into his head. Oh, his body was definitely reacting now.

She moved her warm tongue slowly down his body until she reached his boxer shorts. He expected her to pull them down like she always did, not this time. She licked and kissed around the waist band and then pulled them down just enough to expose his rock hard penis and she began to kiss and lick that as well.

This was a little unexpected. They had never ventured into oral sex. Not that he didn't think about it from time to time and wonder how it would be with her. But the only time she had ever really offered was because she could not physically have sex with him and he didn't want to start their relationship out that way. He never wanted to ask her for it because he didn't want her to feel pressured to perform it on him if she wasn't really into anything like that. It had never come up between them again and he wasn't sure if this was a one time thing or something new she was introducing into the bedroom. He would have to wonder more about that later.

Right now she was all he could think about. His wife. Laying on the bed beside him sucking his dick. And she knew exactly what she was doing. Teasing and taunting him. He could feel the warmth of her tongue on him as she slid her mouth further down over his shaft and he felt his penis enter the back of her throat. She would bring him so close and then pull back and stare at him. Knowing how badly he ached to throw bed down on the bed and to use her words "FUCK HER BRAINS OUT!"

Elliot looked down next to him in the bed. He gazed at the top of her head as it moved over him. He moved his hand down to gently caress the side of her face and pulled out her hair tie so he could run his fingers through her hair. God she was wonderful. Beautiful and smart and sexy as hell and his wife. She was all his. And no other man would ever have her again. This was the thought that crossed his mind as he tipped his head back and moaned. But something was wrong, Elliot felt a knot rising in his stomach.

He closed his eyes and tried to focus on the extremely fucking hot woman with his cock down the back of her throat. Olivia raised her head to look up at him as she stroked his penis gently in her hand.

"Are you okay?" She gasped quietly.

"Yeah, baby. I'm good. You are so incredible." She smiled and she placed her tongue on the head of his penis and continued with what she was doing. She dragged her fingertips ever so lightly up the hard shaft of his penis sending chills up his spine. Elliot gasped and moaned and tipped his head back again as she slowly raised her other hand and caressed his stomach. He had never felt anything so good in his life. How many men have a wife as hot as her and how many of those wives would do something this incredible for their husband? He really was the luckiest man in the world. Elliot felt her begin to speed up just a little and he could tell he was getting close.

"Baby." He said softly as he raised her chin. He still wasn't sure exactly how she preferred to do this and he would take it from her any way she chose, but he had to at least warn her so she was expecting it. She glazed her bottom lip with the tip of her tongue and smiled seductively up at him.

"It's okay," she whispered as she leaned up and kissed his lips still stroking his penis in her hands. "I want to," she whispered softly.

My God she was so HOT! She lowered her mouth back as she stroked him with her hand. With in a few minutes he felt his warmth release into her mouth as they both moaned and he twirled his fingers in her hair. She laid beside him on the bed for a moment staring at him adoringly.

Elliot reached down with one hand and dragged his finger across the elastic band of her panties. He then moved it upward slowly and needed her left breast. She moaned seductively and rolled her eyes back in her head as she bit her lip. It had been way too long for both of them. He grasped one of her thighs in each of his hands and slid her across the bed and underneath him. His penis pressed firmly against her thigh through his boxers begging to come back out.

Elliot caressed the soft skin of her belly as he kissed and licked it making her almost scream. He pushed her little green shirt up and kissed up under it until he had full access to a nipple then pulled it into his mouth as he needed her breast in his hand. Olivia gasped under him as he pulled the tank top from her body and tossed it aside to give him across to both breasts as he licked and sucked them both equally. Elliot made his way down to her panties, moving his fingers under the elastic band preparing to pull them down.

"Yes," she moaned in desperate want of him.

Elliot had his arm under her back raising her from the bed and was staring deep into her eyes as she practically begged him to take her here and now. Just then he felt an awful rumble in the pit of his stomach. Olivia saw the look in his eyes change to an almost panic as he dropped her onto the bed. All she saw was a flash of boxer shorts as he dashed into the bathroom and began violently throwing up. She reached into the floor and pulled her shirt back on.

"Baby, are you okay?" She asked concerned as she tabbed gently on the bathroom door.

Elliot flushed the toilet and pulled the door open to look at her. He was shaking and pale and groaned and placed his hand over his stomach as he moved toward the toilet and began to vomit once more. Olivia got some towels and wash cloths and wiped his face ever so gently with a cool wet cloth.

After about fifteen minutes of vomiting fits she help his weak and trembling body to lay in the bed. She looked at him with a look of worry in her eyes as she brushed her hand softly over his forehead.

"You don't have any fever. Honey, what did you eat?"

"The same stuff you did. Steak and shrimp from the buffet, wedding cake…"

"No baby, I mean today."

"I had a sausage, egg and cheese sandwich and a cup of coffee at the airport."

"Did you get it from the little place I got mine?"

"No, I got it from the vending machine." Elliot grabbed his stomach and groaned in pain as his eyes shot toward the bathroom as if counting the steps from the bed to the door.

"Oh baby. Will you be okay here for a few minutes? I can run out and get you something."

"No, Liv. It will pass."

"When exactly do you expect it to pass? You have already vomited more than you consumed. Would you just relax and let me help you. I'm your wife now Elliot, it is my job to take care of you when you are sick."

"I'm not sick, baby. It is probably just motion sickness from the flight."

"You were not sick on the flight. Honey, you ate something bad. It will pass in a day or two, but you are just coming in to this and if you don't let me help you it is just going to get worse. You don't want to still be like this once we board the boat, do you? Then you will be sea sick, too. Let me run find a pharmacy and get you something."

"Liv, I will be fine. I just need to get some rest, we both do. We have not slept in almost three days. We are both probably just wore out. And that mixed with some not so hot airport vending machine food, made me sick. But I will be fine tomorrow. I just need to lie here and go to sleep. It's almost nine o'clock. Let's just call it an early night. This time tomorrow we will be in the Bahamas."

"Okay. I think I am going to step out into the hall and call Casey, I promised her I would call and let her know what was going on. If you need me just call me, okay." Olivia kissed his forehead.

"Yeah," Elliot replied as he closed his eyes and she pulled the blankets up over him.

Olivia put her jeans back on and stepped out into the hall and leaned against the wall as she dialed Casey's number.

"Hey Case," she said as she heard her friends voice on the other end of the line.

"Hey, what's this change of plans thing? Where the hell are you guys?"

"Right now I am in the hall way of our hotel room in Miami. Elliot is passed out in bed."

"Dang honey you wore him out this early. You are going to have to give the poor man a chance to build up some stamina."

"No," Olivia groaned as she slid down the wall and sat in the floor, "we haven't even had sex yet."

"What? Liv, you guys have been married over twenty four hours and you have not even had sex yet?"

"Nope."

"Sweetie, I'm sorry. You want to talk about it?"

"Well, the first night we just ended up getting a room there at the place where you stayed. We were tired and didn't feel like driving all the way to Jersey. Or so I thought. Elliot had a surprise for me. Tickets for a cruise in the Bahamas. We were supposed to stay there the first night and fly out for Miami this morning spend the day here and then board the boat tomorrow."

"Supposed to?"

"Well, someone kept us up all night having sex." Olivia cleared her throat.

"Oh God, Liv I'm sorry. That is embarrassing."

"Yeah, well Elliot spent the night covering his ears trying to block out the sounds of you screaming John Munch's name through the paper thin walls. Needless to say, he didn't touch me. He barely kissed me, all night. We fell asleep together around quarter to five and were supposed to be up by seven to be at the airport by eight. But I guess the storm knocked out the power last night and the alarm didn't go off. We over slept and had to load the car in the storm and rush to the airport. Just to learn that they canceled our flight and spend eight hours in the airport before we finally got on a plane and flew three more hours to get here. Then I really thought it was going to happen, Casey. I pretty much attacked him the minute we walked into our room. I spent twenty five minutes giving him an amazing blow job,"

Casey chuckled.

"I don't want to hear it. You had sex with John Munch on my wedding night!"

"Oh Liv…"

"No Casey. I don't think I am ready for details." Olivia exhaled.

"So how did you get from an amazing blow job to him being passed out in bed before ten o'clock?"

"He got sick, Case."

"Honey, I am so sorry. What happened?"

"He ate a sandwich from an airport vending machine this morning…."

"Gross."

"Yeah. He has been vomiting violently since somewhere near the end of my little performance. Finally he laid down and fell asleep, poor guy. That was when I came out here to call you."

"Out here, where are you Liv?"

"Sitting in the hall in the floor barefoot wearing my jeans and tank top."

"Sweetheart, I am sorry you guys are having such a rough time. I'm sure it will get better tomorrow, though. You will be in the Bahamas and hopefully he will be better. I'm sure you guys will probably spent the entire time in bed together making up for lost time. It sounds so romantic."

"Thanks Casey."

"No problem."

"Casey…"

"Yeah Liv?"

"How are things with you and John? I mean, was it a one night thing or…"

"We have a date on Tuesday."

"A date? Nice."

"Did Elliot know it was John?"

"Casey, the entire hotel knew it was John."

"That bad, huh?"

"It was pretty bad."

"I am so sorry. I had been drinking and it had been a really long time and…" Casey took a deep breath. "I really like him, Liv. We talked and were thinking of slowing things down and trying dating."

"That is awesome Casey. I am so happy for you. He is a really good guy. And I know he will treat you nice. He is a little bitter, from being burned. He needs a good girl in his life. Who knows, in a few years I might be holding a bouquet in your wedding."

"Not likely to happen any time soon, but if it ever does you know I will expect you to be right there beside me."

"I would be honored to return the favor. Listen, I should go and check on El."

"Well, you two have fun. And I'm sure you will be humping like rabbits in no time!"

"Casey!"

"Well. Just be careful. Or you are liable to bring back a little souvenir you didn't count on."

"Okay, Casey I am on the pill. That is pretty much the only thing in my life I am religious about. That is so not going to happen! I will talk to you later."

"Bye."

Olivia sat in the floor looking at her cell phone and smiled. She stood up and opened their hotel room door and closed it quietly behind her. She walked over to the bed and pulled her jeans off in the floor then slid into bed beside Elliot. She propped her head on her hand and watched him resting peacefully. She turned out the bedside lamp he had left on for her and leaned in and kissed his lips gently, careful not to wake him. His kiss tasted like mint toothpaste. She ran her fingers softly over his forehead.

"Good night baby. I love you," she whispered softly against his ear.

"I love you too Liv," he mumbled softly as she smiled and he wrapped his arm around her, pulling her into her place beside him. She closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep.


	50. 50 Bad Luck

Immediate Danger

_(Chapter Fifty: Bad Luck)_

The next morning Olivia stretched in the hotel room bed. She reached her arm across to where Elliot had been laying, but he wasn't there. She sat up and noticed the bathroom light on and tapped lightly on it.

"El. Baby, is everything okay?" She stood there for a second and he opened the door to look at her. He looked like Hell. All pale and covered in sweat and she could tell he had been vomiting again. "Oh, honey." She said softly as she brushed her hand across his forehead again.

Elliot stood up, flushed the toilet and started to brush his teeth. "Where are you going?" He asked as she slid on her jeans and shoes and pulled her purse over her shoulder.

"To get you some kind of medication. This is crazy! Elliot it is our honeymoon, you shouldn't have to be sick! It wont take but a few minutes."

"Liv, I will be okay. It will pass."

Elliot put down his tooth brush and she wrapped her arms around him as he held he for a moment. "I think I need to lie back down." He said still feeling a little woozy.

Olivia helped him to the bed to rest. "What time do we board?"

"Noon."

She looked at the clock across the room. "It is nine o'clock now. I still need to get a few things before we go. Why don't you get some rest and I will run out and get my shopping done. I will be back here in a few hours and if you are feeling better we can grab some lunch downstairs before we check out." She grabbed a pen and some stationary from the nightstand drawer to make a list. "I still need a bathing suit. Sun block. And a few other things. Do you need anything?"

"I need some razors, I managed to forget my good one." Elliot groaned.

"And I am getting some kind of medication for this….whatever it is. If you want to be stubborn and not take it, that is your choice. But at least we have it if you change your mind."

Elliot just stared at her as she smiled a warm smile.

"Now, you lay down here." She said pushing him slowly back into the bed and turning off the light. "And try to sleep for now. I will be back in a little while. If you need me or think of anything I forgot to put on my list, I have my cell." She placed a soft kiss on his lips. "I love you."

"I love you too, baby." Elliot said surrendering to her plan. It wasn't going to be any use arguing with her, she was too stubborn and he didn't have the energy for it anyway. He closed his eyes as he heard her close the door and was soon sound asleep.

Olivia took a cab across town to a shopping center. She had gone there in search of a bikini, but walked out with a lot of other stuff as well. She found more clothes that were perfect for the trip, some really cute sandals, a couple of cute toe rings to wear with her sandals, nail polish for her toes, Sunglasses for them both, some Miami souvenirs for the kids, three bikini's, some dressy dresses to wear to dinner on board and even a couple of sexy lingerie items to wear for her husband, just in case they actually did get to have sex while they were on their honeymoon. Then she went in to a local pharmacy to get the rest of the items on her list.

She headed back to the hotel a little earlier than she had thought and found Elliot still sound asleep in the bed. She took this opportunity to shower and pack their bags so they were ready for check out. She crawled across the bed and gently kissed Elliot's lips.

"Baby, it's time to wake up." She said with the voice of an Angel. "Elliot. Sweetheart, we have fifteen minutes until check out."

He rolled over and looked into her eyes. "Yeah, yeah," he said softly, "I'm awake."

Olivia smiled at the thought of being able to wake him every morning for the rest of their lives. Elliot placed his arm around her and kissed her. They just stared at each other for a few moments, then he got up and they carried their things down to the front desk and checked out. They grabbed a quick lunch in the hotel restaurant before leaving to go board the cruise ship.

The cabin on board was the most beautiful suite Olivia had ever seen. It was large and had an open living area with a wet bar and a refrigerator stocked with everything you could ever dream of. There were flowers everywhere and a bottle of champagne iced in a bucket waiting for them courtesy of the crew for their honeymoon. The living area had a flat screen television that raised up from a mantel and each of the two Honeymoon Suite's had it's own private balcony, not viewable from the other rooms. The bathroom had his and hers showers and an oversized hot tub, plenty big enough for two. And the king sized bed had little heart shaped chocolates on the pillows. This place was so romantic. She could not believe that Elliot had gone through all of the trouble of setting this up for her.

It was a shame he was still feeling sick or she would attack him right now, she thought as she pulled her bags from the luggage cart and Elliot tipped the young man who had brought up their luggage. Olivia heard Elliot clear his throat and turned around to see the kid jump and turn his head. Her husband was not too pleased with the teenager when he was caught staring and almost drooling over his new wife. Olivia smiled as she walked around the cabin and explored all of the wonderful things she found.

This was going to be and amazing trip and they hadn't even set sail yet. The brochure with the tickets had said that once a day on their seven day cruise the ship would dock an island for six hours to allow travelers to explore the islands as well. Olivia had never strayed too awful far from the city, except on business and she found the idea of the trip exciting and exotic.

Elliot took Olivia's hand in his and kissed her lips. "What do you think?" He asked gazing into her eyes.

"I think this is the most wonderful place I have ever been in my life. And it is even more wonderful, because I get to share it with my husband." She leaned in to him staring up into his eyes as he placed a soft kiss against her lips.

"I'm glad you like it. I was thinking we could take a walk around the deck and check it out. There is a gym and a pool and three different restaurants and dancing and orchestra music every night at dinner. Then during the day we can get off the boat and see the islands and walk on the beaches. We could watch a romantic sunset together on some island in paradise."

Olivia smiled, he was the most wonderful man in the entire world. And he was hers and only hers, for the rest of her life. She was glad to see him finally getting in to this trip and feeling well enough to stay upright for a couple of hours to enjoy it with her.

They walked around the ship hand in hand, just walking and talking and exploring their surroundings as the boat set out to sea. It would be another several hours before they were actually in the Bahamas, but they didn't care. They were in paradise together and in love. That afternoon as they strolled along one of the upper decks hand in hand Olivia lead them over to the railing to look out across the water as dolphins seemed to chase the boat. Unfortunately, it was this moment that brought back Elliot's nausea. They soon returned to the cabin and settled in front of the large television in the living room.

Olivia sat in the floor studying the 24 hour full room service menu as Elliot groaned on the end of the sofa. "I'm going to order. Do you want anything?"

Elliot gulped and turned three shades of green as he ran for the bathroom.

"I guess not," she mumbled as she listened to the awful noises he made in the other room. She pulled the medicine from her bag and took it to him, but he still insisted he would be fine and refused it.

The next day was pretty much the same. Elliot was sick as a dog, but insisted she go out and enjoy her vacation. Vacation, she thought to her self. The only thing that separated a vacation from a honeymoon was the lack of constant sex. Olivia sat a little depressed as she gazed from the balcony out over the water. The blue reminded her of his eyes. She couldn't believe he was missing all of this. She exhaled softly and stepped off the boat onto the snowy white sand of one of the islands and was off to spend a day on her own once again.

Olivia returned that evening to find Elliot slumped on the sofa with the remote in his hand and a warm glass of ginger ale and saltines on a plate beside him. She felt awful for the poor man, who in the last three days had probably vomited his body weight as a result of eating a single sandwich. She sat the plate and glass on the table near the couch and snuggled in to him. Elliot welcomed her by wrapping her in his arms tightly.

"I missed you," she said softly.

"I know honey, I am so sorry."

"There was this guy on the island, he sold me this stuff for seasickness. It is supposed to work really well." She opened her hand to reveal a small bottle of really bad smelling liquid.

"That is awful. How does it cure nausea if the smell makes you sick?"

"I don't know. It is all natural, root extract and stuff from the islands. The locals swear by it. I figured it couldn't hurt. Baby, you have been miserable for three days now."

"I know," he said peering into the bottle once more.

That night before bed Elliot pulled the sheets back and laid beside her wishing to God he had the strength to make love to her the way she needed right now. He was really letting her down. He laid on his stomach and stared across the bed at her then slid his hand up to meet hers.

"I am sorry things have turned out this way."

Olivia folded up the map of the islands the was looking at and laid it on the night stand. "It's okay, it isn't your fault. It just kind of sucks."

She climbed from the bed and walked into the bathroom to brush her teeth and change for bed. A few moments later she returned. "Hey El, what did you do with the little purple compact that was laying next to my tooth brush in the bathroom?"

"What?" He asked distracted by the fact that the light behind her made it possible to see every curve of her body through the gown she wore.

She walked over to her purse and pulled out a purple compact. "It looked just like this one. I left it next to my tooth brush so I wouldn't forget it when we left for Jersey, you packed my things. Do you know where you put it?"

"Oh, I didn't bring it. I knew you had one in your purse and didn't think you needed more make up."

Olivia just stared at him for a minute. "You are kidding, right?"

He looked up at her. "No, why? Baby, if it is that important we will get you more make up. There is a pharmacy on one of the lower decks."

She just stared at him as tears began to fill her eyes. She sat on the end of the bed and gasped. "Elliot, that wasn't make up. That little purple compact was my birth control pills."

Oh shit! Elliot thought as he scratched his head. He was not fully sure what that meant, but by the look on her face it was bad. Really bad.

"Um, baby what exactly does that mean?"

"That, Elliot means that I just took my last pill a this morning and we are here for six more nights with no birth control pills."

He looked a little confuse as she started to cry. "Liv, sweetheart calm down. I am so sorry, I honestly had no idea. I thought it was make up, I swear." He brushed some tears from her cheeks and looked at her. "I screwed this one up pretty bad, huh?"

"You didn't know," she sobbed.

"Baby, don't cry. Please."

But she couldn't stop. "I can't help it. I am starting to feel like we are cursed. Or like we are being punished for something. First the storm and we almost miss our flight, then you get sick and I have spent the last two and a half days of my honeymoon practically alone while my violently ill husband tried to sleep…."

"Honey, I know how you feel. I have been married to the most beautiful woman in the world for almost three days now and we still have not even consummated our marriage."

She looked at him and her tears continued to fall. "I almost feel like we are on the honeymoon from Hell."

"Honey, it will get better. It will work out. I promise."

"How?"

"Well first of all. I, right now am going to take some of this medicine." Elliot picked the bottle up and swigged a large portion of it's contents almost choking on his reflex to gag because the stuff was so disgusting. "I mean what have I really got to lose, right?"

Olivia smiled a little at the face he made when he forced himself to swallow the nasty stuff. Elliot sat beside her on the bed. "And there has to be something we can do about this other issue, also. I am not really familiar with this birth control thing, explain it to me. What are exactly are we looking at here?"

"With out my pill, I am not protected against pregnancy when we have sex. I just took my last one today, so the hormone will still be in my system for tonight, but you are still sick. After that…."

She just looked at him.

"Well, there are other ways, right. I will get condoms. I mean it sucks that we have to use condoms on our honeymoon, but it is better than no sex at all, right?"

Olivia nodded her head. "But Elliot, if I don't take the pill I will also get my period. I just filled a brand new prescription, because I knew I didn't have enough for the entire honeymoon. I can't even try to call another one in, I don't have any more until I see my doctor."

"Baby, I am going to do my best. Okay, tomorrow I will get condoms. And I will spend the night making love to my wife if it kills me. And we will just have to try to do whatever we can until you get your period. Look, I am so sorry."

"I know. You didn't do it on purpose. I just kind of freaked out. Lately it seems like we are running into a lot of bad luck. It is just a little scary, you know."

Elliot cupped his hand against the side of her face. "I know, but if we stick together. Baby, you and I can make it through anything."

She smiled at him and Elliot pulled her into his arms. He may not have had the energy to make love to her right now, but he could hold her tight and show her he would make everything okay.


	51. 51 Waterfall

_**Immediate Danger**_

_**(Chapter Fifty One: Waterfall)**_

"**Stop it!" Olivia almost growled as she pulled a pillow over her face. It was the first full night sleep she had gotten since the wedding and she was determine to get her full eight hours! "Elliot, quit." She snarled in an attempt to let him know she meant business.**

**Elliot was in no way scared of her and was going to get her out of that bed if he had to drag her out with his own two hands. This was the first day of the entire honeymoon that he had felt well and was planning on taking full advantage of it and his wife! **

"**Olivia, wake up. It is almost nine o'clock. Breakfast is waiting and it is a beautiful day."**

"**The day will still be beautiful at ten o'clock," she mumbled waving her hand as if to shoo him away with her face still buried under the pillow.**

"**Fine, but I am starving and I am going down to that breakfast buffet. I was hoping to have a nice meal with my wife, but I guess I will have to do that some other time." He turned to walk away hoping she would emerge from the heaping pile of blankets and join him.**

"**Don't eat the sausage!" She called out to him from underneath her pillow.**

"**Oh Hell no! I learned that lesson the first time!" Elliot said as they both laughed. He crawled back across the bed and raised the pillow just far enough to kiss her lips. "Please come eat with me."**

"**Baby, I am so tired." She exclaimed sitting half way up in the bed and dropping the pillow to her waist. "I feel like I have not slept in a month. I thought this was supposed to be peaceful and relaxing?"**

"**It is, come relax with me over breakfast."**

"**I just want to sleep in today, we never get to do that at home. Give me an hour. Please?"**

**She was so cute with her hair all roughed up and her tired eyes squinting to look at him. And now she was begging. She should have known from the start he couldn't tell her no. Besides he had slept practically the entire trip so far and she had to occupy herself and sit around taking care of him. **

"**Okay, one hour." He leaned in to kiss her lips. "Make it count, you're going to need your strength later."**

"**Oh I am, huh?"**

"**Yeah."**

"**Yeah? Well, trust me buddy I have enough pent up inside me to last quite a while. It is you dear….." she crawled across the bed to kiss him, "who is going to need your strength." She stared him down and raised an eyebrow in a sexy manor. **

**Elliot smiled. "I will be back in a little bit," he said softly kissing her forehead. "Sweet dreams baby."**

**Olivia smiled at him as he walked out of the room. He was the most amazing husband in the world. She laid back down and closed her eyes, but after about fifteen minutes she couldn't sleep anyway. She got up and took a hot shower, then slid on a bikini and a really cute sundress she had just bought and headed down to meet him for breakfast.**

**She spotted him standing beside one of the many buffet tables and she quickly grabbed a plate and moved around to the other side of the table.**

"**Did anyone see you?" She whispered in a sexy voice without looking up at him.**

"**No. I managed to slip away without anyone noticing," he played along.**

"**Are you sure you're wife doesn't know about us?" She shot him a sexy look across the table.**

"**I'm pretty sure. Though it was risky me meeting you here on your honeymoon."**

**Olivia smiled at him and they both laughed as an older woman in her late fifties woman scoffed and walked away from the table.**

"**Come here beautiful," he said sitting his plate down to put his arms around her practically lifting her off the ground to kiss her. "Hey."**

"**Hey," she said gazing into his eyes. Elliot kissed her passionately.**

"**Glad you decided to join me. I almost had to eat with our friend Mildred over there," Elliot pointed to the same woman who was sitting at a table clearly marked "singles" on a sign as she stared them down giving them a dirty look. They looked at each other and held up their wedding rings to the woman and Elliot kissed Olivia again.**

"**Well, we ruined her day. I think maybe Mildred had a little crush on you."**

"**I'm sure she will recover."**

**They both filled their plates and retreated to a table outside on the deck in the beautiful sunshine. The food was so good and Elliot hadn't eaten a real meal in days. He watched Olivia as the salty sea air blew across her face causing her wavy hair to dance in the wind. She looked so incredibly sexy. He was the luckiest man in the world. **

**After breakfast the boat docked and they ventured off to explore one of the islands. Olivia was taking a thousand pictures. Everything was so beautiful and so exotic. One of the crew members lead a group on a hike around some of the more popular tourist hot spots on the island. The tour ended with two hours at one of the most beautiful beaches in the world. **

**By now everyone was pretty much sweaty and tired and many of the other couples had already returned to the boat. Elliot held her hand tight as they strolled along the beach. Her long tan legs sparkled from the sea salt in the water that splashed against them and her painted toes sank in the sand as she walked carrying her shoes in her hand. **

**You would never guess if you ever ran in to "Badass Benson" in a dark alley, but Olivia was really a girly girl. She always kept a pedicure and to the best of her ability kept her nails done too. She almost always wore make up and a soft lip gloss, even at work. And she could not stand for a single strand of her hair to be out of place. **

**Elliot thought about this as he glanced at her fingers laced in his and noticed the detail of her French manicured nails. Liv, was a little bit of a princess. Elliot stopped walking and just held her hand until she walked over to him. He placed his hand against her jaw and stared into her beautiful brown eyes as they sparkled in the island sun. She was his princess. **

**He still was not sure what he had ever done to deserve something so wonderful, but he sure as hell was not going to let her get away. Elliot pulled her body tight against his and kissed her passionately as waves crashed against their feet. Olivia threw her arms around his neck and pulled him closer to her as he slipped one hand down and grasped her ass.**

"**Elliot, there are other people on this beach." She just stared up at him with a shy smile. Elliot smiled back as he pressed his lips to the side of her neck and moved his hand back to hers.**

**He walked them a little further down the beach then stopped and slid his shoes off. He waded out a little in the water leading her out by the hand. He pulled his tee shirt off showing off his muscular chest. Olivia pulled the little yellow sundress over her head and tossed it on the beach beside the pile he had started. Elliot stared at her incredible bikini body and the sexy little white bikini she wore under that dress. It perfectly held her body and showed off her flat stomach and abs. The bathing suit tied with thin white strings over each of her hips and on he top behind her neck and back. It was the sexiest thing he had ever seen. **

**He had lead them far enough up the beach that the other people appeared only as small spots down the shore. Now they had privacy and could be alone together. They swam and splashed around a little pushing each other under the water. Olivia swam up to him and wrapped her legs around his waist as she caressed his chest with her fingers. She stared deep into his eyes and pressed her lips to his. **

"**I love you," she mouthed almost voiceless against his mouth.**

**Elliot knew exactly what she was saying because his lips recognized the words as she formed them. Elliot swam now holding them both up in water over their heads as she kissed him passionately. He moved his hands against her back as she leaned her head back and he kissed her neck. He loved the way the salt made her skin taste. **

"**Baby, look." Olivia said turning her head and pointing. Upstream along the beach a few yards away was a waterfall that was now visible. They climbed from the water and walked over to the pool of freshwater that poured beneath the fall. The water was deep, only a few feet out it was already well over both of their heads. The fall was only about ten feet high and Olivia thought it was a good idea to climb up the slippery rock and jump off into the water. Elliot tried to talk her out of it insisting it was too dangerous. But she made her way to the top.**

"**Come jump with me," she called down to him. **

"**No way. You're a crazy woman."**

"**But you love me anyway?"**

"**Damn right I do. That is one of the million and ten things I find so incredibly attractive about you."**

"**Elliot come on, it isn't that far down and the water is really deep there. It will be fun."**

"**If we both jump who will call the ambulance?"**

"**Very funny." She looked at him with the look. "Please." Oh no, now he had to.**

**A smile crossed her face as she watched him climb the rocks to stand beside her.**

**Elliot looked down to the water below. It seemed much higher looking down than it did looking up. "One time. I jump with you one time, then that is it. No more climbing up here, okay. This is dangerous. I don't want to lose you on our honeymoon."**

**Olivia looked at him and smiled as she laced her fingers between his and locked them tight holding his hand in hers. "You will never lose me," she said with a smile and he hoped to God she was right. He knew he couldn't live without her. She leaned in and kissed him. "Ready?"**

**Elliot smiled as he saw that flame in her eyes. The same flame that burned there when they made love. Her fire, her hunger for life and all of the wonder and excitement that it held. It swirled in her, this amazing energy visible only in her eyes at moments of great intensity. And he saw it now. He took a deep breath and looked down onto the water again.**

"**One…..two…..three!" He counted off. They both jumped not letting their fingers part and in seconds they were far under the water. Elliot opened his eyes to see her there, the water lifting her hair around her face, she looked like a mermaid. He pulled her to him, by their still locked hands and kissed her lips as they surfaced.**

"**Woo!" She called out as she shot up out of the water pushing her hair back. "See it wasn't that bad."**

"**No, it wasn't." He smiled at her as he swam to her. Elliot wrapped her in his arms and kissed her wildly ash she moaned and put her arms around his neck. He backed he up in the water until the water fell down onto them, but they didn't seem to notice. Their hands and lips and eyes were roaming into places they hadn't visited in quite some time. **

**Their mouths seemed to have become one inseparable mass causing their noses and faces to sort of blend together as well. Elliot held one arm tight around her waist and with the other he pushed them further back under the waterfall. From here the wall of water created a sort of secret hide away and no one could see them. The sound of the water pounding heavily against the rocks excited them as he cupped her perfect ass in his hands once more.**

**This time instead of fighting him off she moaned seductively and just let it happen. She looked deep into his eyes and kissed his lips. A concrete wall under the man made waterfall provided support for their bodies as he backed her gently against it and moved his hands up to untie the white bikini top and place it on top the wall beside her head. Elliot held to the wall with one hand as he caressed her body with the other and kissed her with deep, intimate kisses. She moaned as she felt his fingers brush under the thin string of her bikini bottom and pull it free. Elliot placed it next to the top on the wall. He continued kissing and sucking gently on her now bare breasts, before moving his mouth back to hers. **

**Olivia looked deep into his eyes. This was the most romantic place she had ever thought about making love and it would be her first time with her husband. She wrapped her arms tight around his neck and pressed her forehead to his as she trembled just a little. **

"**Are you okay?" Elliot asked her. She looked as if she were about to cry.**

"**Yeah," she said with a soft smile. "I just can't believe this is really happening. I mean it all kind of seems like a dream." She took a deep breath and Elliot kissed her.**

"**We can wait if you want, until we get back to the room."**

"**No, I want to do this. Here, with you."**

**Elliot slid his hand down her bare back and into the water then pulled his shorts off and laid them on top the tiny white bikini. He kissed her and started touching and kissing her body as he held her tight to him. Olivia reached up her arm and grabbed the wall to free his hands to touch her body. It had now been almost twelve days since they had made love and she had never wanted anything more than she wanted his touch, right now. **

**She sighed and moaned as he touched her in places they couldn't see below the water. He pulled her against him again and she could feel he was ready.**

"**I don't have a condom," he gasped against her lips.**

**Olivia looked at him. It had completely slipped her mind. She bit her lip thinking for a moment. If she walked away from this moment she knew she would regret it for the rest of her life. "Wait, I took a pill yesterday. So technically, I have not missed one yet. But after tonight, we have to be careful."**

"**Are you sure?" **

"**I'm sure," she gasped. **

**She threw her one free arm around his neck and he pressed his mouth to hers again as he slid inside her. She moaned and tipped her head back. She closed her eyes only for a second to remember exactly the way he felt inside her. She felt like it had been years since they had made love. **

**Twelve days was a long time when you had the sex drive of a teenaged boy. And she did. Especially when it came to Elliot, her husband. She pondered this thought only for a second as she felt her body preparing for an orgasm. That was fast, but she wasn't finished. He wasn't letting her be finished that easily.**

**She moaned and panted and he moaned back. They made love for almost an hour before they both reached a big climax together calling out into the echoes underneath the waterfall and no one else could hear them. Elliot leaned against her now quivering body. She had forgotten for a moment she was holding them up and let go to throw her arm around his neck in the excitement, nearly drowning them both. **

"**I'm sorry, I…I" she mumbled and gasped as she spit out water and they both laughed exhausted. **

**Elliot pulled them both back against the wall and stared into her eyes.**

"**I love you." He said and she felt like she would melt.**

"**I love you too." She smiled at him as he handed her back her bikini bottom.**

**They fumbled around in the water for a little bit to get dressed then swam back to the beach. Olivia wrapped herself in his arms the second they surfaced and gazed into his eyes. He stared down over her and held her body against hers as he kissed her passionately. She, now officially, his wife.**

**Elliot traced her lips with his fingertip as the golden sun cast a glow over everything. She snapped a couple of post card worthy photographs of their waterfall with her digital camera, it was so beautiful. They stood together there on their beach beside their waterfall and watched the sunset. **

**Afterward Olivia pulled her yellow sundress back over the little white bikini. Elliot smiled as she covered it up. It made it sort of seem like something she had hidden only for him. Elliot pulled his shirt back on and held her against him as they strolled barefoot back down the beach, sand between their toes and water crashing at their feet.**

**This was the most amazing afternoon of the entire trip. **


	52. 52 Tangled

**Immediate Danger**

**(Chapter Fifty Two: Tangled)**

_**Olivia placed her head against Elliot's shoulder and closed her eyes as he held her tight in his arms. The last few days had seemed almost like one long romantic dream. But in two days, the dream would be over and they would be forced to wake up and return to their real life back in New York. Not that their life there together wasn't good, but it was nothing like the paradise they found here. **_

_**On this ship, in these islands there was no crime and no violence. Life was lazy and peaceful and easy. They spent their days exploring new worlds and their evenings drinking wine and dining in exquisite restaurants on board and slow dancing so closely together that it were as if their bodies were one. At night they mad love for hours on end then fell asleep in each others arms only to wake a few hours later and make love again. **_

_**They had run into a little bad luck in the beginning, but after a few minor adjustments to their plans had managed to work everything out wonderfully and these last few days were like heaven. Heaven. Olivia thought to herself as she looked into his eyes, if it is anything like this, take me now. She held tight to his arm with her hand as he moved his fingers slowly up her spine while gliding them slowly across the ballroom floor. **_

"_**Tell me what you are thinking," Elliot whispered softly against her ear.**_

"_**I'm thinking we should never leave. Never go back. Just stay here, together like this forever."**_

"_**Baby, you know I would sell off everything I owned and move us here if I could. Buy that island. Our island and our waterfall. Then we could make love there every night. Spend our days laying around on the beach, swimming and building sand castles. Rubbing this gorgeous body down with tanning oil. You could wear that little white bikini every day and we'd lay out in a hammock together all day and sleep in the warm sun. Just you and me, forever. I don't want it to end either Liv."**_

"_**I love you," she said sweetly as she kissed his lips. "Thank you so much, for this. For everything."**_

_**Elliot kissed her hand and placed it against his chest to feel his heart pounding as he stared into her eyes and kissed her lips. He cupped his hand against the curve of her jaw as he brought it to rest against his chest once more. He moved his fingers slowly down the open back of her dress and rubbed his hand in circles against her warm skin as he tightened his arms around her. Olivia had never felt so safe or loved in her entire life as she did in this moment. **_

"_**I have an idea," he said softly as she opened her eyes and looked up at him, "lets take a walk."**_

"_**Okay," she said softly. She didn't care if they spent the rest of the trip sitting on the sofa watching television, this was the most romantic time of her life.**_

_**Elliot held her hand tight in his arms as they strolled around the deck talking. He told her his plans to save a little money and then buy them a house with a fenced yard for the kids to play in. By kids, he meant little Eli and the babies he wanted with her. He talked about growing old together and grandchildren. She loved the excitement in his eyes as he shared his dreams with her. **_

_**They stood at the rail and looked up at the stars over the navy depths below them. It was almost hard to believe that this almost black substance was the same crystal blue water that surrounded them during the day. A breeze blew across the deck and Elliot placed his jacket around her and pulled her into his arms. **_

"_**I don't want this to be over, Liv. But I cannot wait to go home and start our lives together."**_

_**She smiled and looked at him as placed a small kiss against his chin.**_

"_**It's getting late. We should try to get up early tomorrow and really enjoy our last two days here," she said.**_

"_**I was thinking we could check out the spa and maybe get a couples massage."**_

"_**My husband is a genius!" She said with a large smile. "That sounds wonderful."**_

"_**Maybe spend more time just laying around and enjoying our room. Doing nothing. Everything back home is so fast paced, I just want to be able to soak up all the relaxation and downtime we can before we are thrown back into the rush of city life. This almost seems like an entirely different planet."**_

_**She laughed and smiled, then leaned in and kissed him suggestively.**_

"_**Exactly what have you got on your mind, Mrs. Stabler?"**_

_**She laughed seductively and raised one eyebrow in a suggestive manor. "I was thinking it is way past my bedtime. Maybe you should take me back to our room and put me to bed."**_

_**Elliot kissed her intimately. "Baby, you read my mind!"**_

_**As soon as they walked into their room and the door was shut behind them Elliot picked her up and carried her to the bed. He tossed her playfully across it then crawled over the top of her. He kissed her and felt every inch of her body above the dress. **_

"_**Wait," Olivia said as she climbed out from under him. "Hold that thought!"**_

_**He watched her as she grabbed a bag from her suitcase and bounced across the room and into the bathroom. Elliot moved to the night stand beside the dresser and pulled out a condom. Making love to her was definitely better with out them, but it was still pretty amazing with them. **_

_**He knew she wanted children with him, but she wasn't quite ready right now. He wanted the chance to give her everything. He wanted them to buy a house and get out of the cramped apartment and live in a safer area near some of the better schools. He wanted to be able to buy her everything she ever wanted and needed during a pregnancy and give their child everything. It would just be a lot easier if they were able to pay off the wedding and get a house and save up a little money and then plan to conceive a child together. **_

_**He was pretty sure this was Olivia's plan as well. So for now, until they got home and she could get back on her pills anyway, they used condoms every time they made love. We should have bought stock in Trojan, Elliot thought to himself with a smile as he closed the drawer. **_

_**Olivia reentered the bedroom with a sexy strut wearing sexy lingerie. Elliot moved his eyes up her long legs to the ruffly thong she wore. It was black with little blue polka dots and a matching ribbon that hung down one of her legs. Above that her flat sexy stomach was fully exposed. Elliot rubbed his hands over it as he kissed her and cupped his hands to firmly grasp her butt. **_

_**Olivia smiled at him as he slid his hands up under the chiffon material and untied the ribbon of the jacket that matched her thong. Elliot was raring and ready to go and had a look on his face like a child unwrapping his favorite Christmas gift. He opened the front of the robe like jacket but let it hang on her shoulders as he moved both his eyes and his fingers up to examine the black lace see thru bra with a little ruffle that matched her thong and jacket. It was a good thing lingerie wasn't disposable, Elliot thought to him self, he would love to see this more often. Not that she didn't look sexy in all of her lingerie, but there was something about the soft material and the layers and little blue dots that really made this one hot.**_

_**He moved his hands up to gently squeeze and massage her breasts over the thin lace material. Then he pulled her closer to kiss her. Elliot stood from the edge of the bed as he moved his hands up under the ruffle of her thong and raised her to his waist as she pulled her legs around him. He kissed her passionately and caressed the side of her face as he twirled his fingers through strands of her hair. He spun her around and laid her softly back onto the bed as he moved slowly next to her. **_

_**He kissed slowly from the tip of her toes all the way up her long leg until his mouth softly brushed the smooth skin just below her navel. He placed baby kissed around the waist band of her sexy little thong as he slid his fingers slowly under it and inside her. Olivia moaned softly as she stared into his eyes and he could feel her warm wetness. **_

_**Elliot leaned up and kissed her as he moved his fingers slowly and steadily inside causing her to call out and moan for him. He moved his free hand up to the little lace bra and untied the string behind her neck then pulled the front forward exposing her breasts as he kissed and licked each of them. Olivia tipped her head back and moaned loudly as he felt her body tremble to his touch.**_

_**She reached her hand up and smoothed it over his bare chest as she pressed her lips together. As she glided her hand down his chest and traced little circles above the waist band of his boxer shorts.**_

_**Elliot raised up over her only for a moment as he kissed her lips then trailed kisses slowly down her chest and across her belly then slowly pulled off her thong. He slid his tongue slowly inside her as he pulled her waist against him. He had her all the way to the edge of the bed with one of her knees on each side of his head as he stroked his fingers back and forth over her belly and she gasped and panted and trembled at his mercy. He kept her on the edge for quite a while before finally letting her slip into a strong orgasm as she moaned and almost screamed his name as she clawed at his shoulders. He kept going until she just couldn't take it anymore and turned her knee in toward his face pushing him back. **_

_**She moaned and panted in the bed trying to catch her breath. Elliot moved back up to stare in her eyes now glassed over in ecstasy and the grabbed him and pulled his mouth to meet hers. She pulled him over her body as he hands explored him. Within moments she had him laying on his back in the bed and his boxers down at his feet. She stared up at him as she moved her hand over his penis then kissed lips once more before moving down. **_

_**She dragged her tongue gently over the tip of his penis then moved her mouth down over the shaft. She continued with another of her amazing blow jobs until she couldn't wait any longer. She raised her eyes to look at him as she pointed to the night stand and snapped her fingers. Elliot fumbled his fingers around almost nicking the condom off in the floor before he caught a hold of it passing it to her. She tore open the end of the wrapper and unrolled it over his erection. **_

_**Olivia leaned up and kissed her husband seductively as she kissed his neck and across his collarbone, then she straddled Elliot's waist. He one hand on her abdomen and one on the small of her back and helped guide her as she slid down onto him and he was inside of her.**_

_**It took everything they had in them for them both to last through the first five minutes. Elliot pushed the chiffon jacket back off her shoulders and it crumpled against the bed. He smoothed his hand over the back and pulled the little tie on the bra until it fell between them and he pushed it off in the floor.**_

_**They moved so good together as she rode him and he grasped hard to her ass pulling her harder onto him and they both moaned. After a little while Elliot sat up to face her, pulling her body against his and holding his hands on her hips as she ground against him. She reached her arms behind her as he speeded up his movements inside her.**_

_**As she came closer to climax Olivia allowed herself to fall completely back against the bed and Elliot now raised up on his knees to thrust forward into her. She reached her hands down and placed them on his ass clawing and pulling him into her as she moaned. She was getting close and so was he. A little faster and a little harder, a few minutes later they finished simultaneously. **_

_**Elliot fell against her exhausted as he felt her heart pounding. He laid beside her in the bed as she rolled onto him and kissed him passionately. He caressed her face with his hand and moved his fingers over her bare skin feeling the goose bumps he had put there. She moaned a tired but excited moan as she collapsed against his chest and kissed him there.**_

"_**Oh baby," she laughed still trembling from her orgasm.**_

"_**Ahh, I know."**_

"_**Is it just me," she asked, " or does that seem to get better every time we do it? It is like it is even better now since we are married."**_

"_**It is amazing, it always has been. I don't know about better, but it definitely means more. You know? I'm not having sex with my girlfriend anymore, I am making love to my wife. And that in its self is incredibly hot! Then you wear sexy little things like this," he said picking up the jacket from the bed and looking down at it before tossing it aside and putting his arms around her again.**_

_**Olivia snuggled in against him for the night as he pulled the blankets up against them and kissed her forehead.**_

"_**I can't believe our honeymoon is almost over," she said softly looking up at him. **_

"_**I don't know, I think I am about ready to go back home. I can't wait for us to get settled into our lives as husband and wife." **_

_**She smiled at him and kissed him again. "I can't wait for that massage tomorrow," she said as she laced her fingers between his. **_

"_**I think we should sleep late and order breakfast in bed. Spend the next two days right here, just like this."**_

"_**Just laying around relaxing."**_

"_**No, naked and completely exhausted in each others arms form incredibly sex!"**_

"_**Oh, well that sounds good to me."**_

"_**Everything I need is right here in this room," Elliot joked. "My beautiful naked wife, the television, a telephone and a bathroom. You add some room service and we would never have to leave."**_

"_**I don't know, something tells me that Munch and Fin couldn't hold down the fort without us."**_

"_**That is a good point. Well damn baby, I guess we have to go back then."**_

"_**Yes," she whispered kissing his lips, "but not for two more days."**_

_**Elliot held tight to his wife and within moments they had both fallen asleep, tangled up in each other.**_


	53. 53 Adaptation

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Fifty Three: Adaptation)_

Almost two months had gone by since they had returned from their romantic honeymoon in paradise. And life had pretty much returned to normal for them back in the city. Olivia sat at her desk across from her new partner as she listened to yet another one of John Munch's not so funny jokes about the fact that they now had two Detective Stabler's.

"Stabler and Stabler," he repeated in case no one heard him the first time. Olivia rolled her eyes in frustration and Fin caught the look.

"Yeah, that's like Simon and Simon, only not. Right?" Fin chimed in hoping that Munch would realize exactly how funny it wasn't and give it up. He looked back at Olivia and she smiled at him. "You gotta know it's worse for Elliot. He means well. Just no one thinks John Munch's jokes are as funny as he does."

She took a deep breath and exhaled. Her eyes shifted to a picture of them sitting on her desk, a picture from their cruise. She stared at it for a minute. They had been so busy at work this last month that Munch had seen more of her husband than she had.

"You miss it?"

"Miss what?"

"The way things used to be. You and Elliot working together."

She shifted her eyes to look at Fin. "I love working with you."

"It's okay Liv. You were partners for eleven years. Sometimes change takes a while to get used to."

She smiled at him. "It's just different, with you and me. Great. But different. Fin, I do love working with you."

"I love working with you too, partner." He smiled at her and she laughed. "Those two are headed off to court for the afternoon. What do you say we grab some lunch and talk to some witnesses across town."

"Sure."

Everything was different with Fin as her partner. He had a completely different style than Elliot. And it was actually kind of nice not having to figure out what was on his mind all of the time. If Fin was thinking something, he said it. This made her job much easier. They had great chemistry as a team and seemed to be working out very well.

Elliot however, wasn't always so pleased with his new situation. He and Munch stepped on each others toes a lot and both seemed to want to run the operation. They were both stubborn and bullheaded and thought exactly alike. Some days they were ready to kill each other.

"So, Elliot leaves tomorrow for that Boston conference again."

"Yeah," she said looking up at Fin. "This year they are sending he and Munch."

"Two whole weeks with out your husband?"

"I'm going to miss him. But we have been apart before. And we talk like a hundred times a day when he goes to these things. He misses me."

"Aww."

She laughed.

"So I should probably limit the number of times I call you tonight?"

Olivia smiled at him. "I want to plan something special for him before he goes away. Dinner and wine, a romantic evening. And yes, if you call and it isn't a dire emergency you will have to deal with me tomorrow."

"Oh, I know better."

They both laughed and Olivia tried not to be embarrassed.

"I am glad that the two of you are so happy together. I told him moments before the wedding that he'd better take good care of you."

"He does. He is a very good husband. And my best friend. You don't have anything to worry about."

"Good."

Olivia smiled and patted him on the shoulder.

They finished up a little early so that Olivia could get home and prepare her special evening for her husband. She cooked a romantic dinner and lit candles all over the apartment then poured them each a glass of red wine as he walked in.

"Wow, something smells wonderful."

"I hope you are hungry, because I cooked way too much food."

"You're in luck, I'm starving." Elliot wrapped her tight in his arms and kissed her passionately. "You are such an amazing wife," he said brushing the tip of her nose with his finger. "I'm sorry that we have been so messed up at work and I haven't made more time for you."

"I know the job, El. I have been busy, too."

He smiled at her across the table as they sat down to eat. It was nearly eight o'clock already and he had just gotten home. They had been working a lot of late shifts lately.

"It just kind of sucks, we have been back home for about two months now and I can count the times I have made love to my wife on one hand."

She wiped her mouth with her napkin and walked over to sit on his lap. "Well, if I have anything to do with it all of that will change tonight," she said softly leaning in to kiss him as she played with his tie. "You finish eating," she said standing up from his lap. "I'll get us more wine."

A few hours later they were curled up together on the couch and Olivia seated herself on his lap and began kissing him. Elliot leaned back and let her take over. They moved their hands over each others bodies as they kissed passionately. She moaned seductively as he kissed a tender place behind her ear.

Elliot picked her up and carried her to bed to take advantage of her. They laughed and moaned and rolled around exploring each other playfully as they removed clothing and tossed it into a pile on the bedroom floor.

Things had just started to really heat up when Elliot's phone rang on the charger beside the bed. Olivia moaned and gasped as he lifted the blankets surrounding them and looked at it. "I am going to kill him!"

She snickered a little as Elliot flipped open the phone. Olivia took it from his hand and answered. "Hello. Oh, hi John. No, I'm great. Everything is great."

Elliot stared at her in amazement.

"Well, John he is a little busy at the moment can I take a message and have him call you back? Umm, I see. Okay. I will tell him. Thanks for the call." She flipped the phone shut and looked up at Elliot. "He says that it is supposed to cold and rainy in Boston so you should bring a jacket and pack warm clothes. And that your flight leaves at eight so you should be there by seven to check in." She smiled and tossed the phone across the room as she pulled him back against her and started kissing him.

"I don't know how you do it!" Elliot said stopping again. "He drives me insane, calling all day about stupid things and sending me texts when he is sitting at the desk next to me. Telling those obnoxious and not even remotely funny jokes!"

Olivia placed her hands on each side of Elliot's face and looked into his eyes. "Elliot, me. Can you focus on me? I mean you have a naked woman laying underneath you, I would think you could forget about John Munch for at least a little while."

"I'm sorry baby, but this happens all the time. It is like he has this radar or something and he knows the exact moment I am inside my wife. Then he calls me!"

She sat up a little in the bed. "Do you still want to do this?"

"Of course I do."

"I was just wondering because I have been laying here for about ten minutes now waiting for something to happen and all you have done it talk about John Munch. I am trying really hard right now to ignore the fact that his name has come up in the middle of sex, but seeing as the sex has completely stopped. He seems to be getting more attention than I am."

"Baby, I'm sorry." Elliot leaned in and kissed her gently.

"I have an idea," she said pushing him off and out of her and climbing over him in the bed. She leaned in and kissed him passionately. "Why don't you let me take your mind off of him? Close your eyes," she whispered as she placed his hands on her breasts and slid down until he was inside her again.

They both moaned and started breathing heavy as Elliot opened his eyes to look at her. "Oh yeah," he mumbled as she smiled.

They made love two more times that night, before finally falling asleep together.

Elliot woke up the next morning before the alarm went off and shut it off. He rolled over and tried to scoot out from under her without waking her and to get into the shower. He thought the attempt was successful until about five minutes later when the bathroom door opened and he could hear her moving around in the bathroom.

"I was trying to let you sleep in a little," he said as she brushed her teeth.

"It's okay. I needed to get up anyway," she said as she flushed the toilet forgetting he was under the water.

Elliot shouted and jumped to the back of the bath tub.

"Baby, I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking. Did you get burned?"

"No, it was ice cold," he said reaching his hand out to check to see if the water was safe to stand under again.

Olivia slipped out of the tee shirt she had put on moments earlier and stepped in behind him. Elliot felt her hands smoothing over his back as he washed the soap from his hair. He turned around and put his arms around her kissing her. "What are you doing?" He asked playfully.

"Trying to warm you up," she said with a devious smile before kissing him again.

They kissed and touched each other before he backed her up and they made love against the shower wall.

"I love you," he whispered as he kissed her gently and stepped out of the shower.

"I love you, too." She backed up under the water to wash her hair.

Elliot wrapped himself in a towel and went back to the bedroom to get dressed for the day. He came back into the bathroom to brush his teeth as she stepped out, put on her robe and wrapped a towel around her hair. She kissed the back of his neck as she headed for the bedroom to get dressed.

Elliot rinsed his mouth out with water and reached for a hand towel and that was when he saw it.

"Baby, what is this?" He called to her in the other room.

"What?" She walked down the hall wearing jeans and a bra to see what he was talking about.

"Is there something you want to tell me?" He asked holding the pregnancy test he found on the counter as she stepped around the corner.

"Oh, it's nothing baby. Casey thinks it is funny that I got my pills all screwed up when we went on our honeymoon and she keeps teasing me and telling me I got pregnant. She gave this to me at work a few weeks ago. We're supposed to have lunch today so I was going to prove to her that I'm not. We used condoms the entire time. It is kind of hard to get pregnant if you are not exposed."

She walked back to the bedroom as Elliot shrugged his shoulders and dropped it back to the counter.

He finished getting ready and fixed them both coffee to go and she dashed back to the bedroom for something she forgot. On her way back down the hall she went back into the bathroom. Elliot waited a few minutes then went after her.

"Liv, we are running so late baby. We have to go now."

He tapped on the bathroom door and opened it slowly as she was holding the test in her hand.

"You got it, now honey we really have to go."

"Elliot, wait…."

"What?"

"Look," she said as she turned the test for him to see and the word "pregnant" appeared in the little window.

He stared at it then walked over and moved her hand to look closer. "I thought you said there was no way."

"I didn't think there was."

Elliot smiled and laughed in shock.

She smiled. "Elliot do you know what this means?"

"We're gonna have a baby. I'm going to be a father."

She nodded her head as tears filled her eyes. "That and I got pregnant in the Bahamas."

He looked at her. "Really?"

"The waterfall. It was the only time we didn't use a condom."

Elliot laughed and smiled as he pulled her into him and held her. "I knew we made some magic under there. God baby, our first time as husband and wife and we get pregnant." He kissed her forehead then kissed her lips. "We're gonna have a baby," he mumbled still in shock.

"Yeah," she said with a smile.

She was quiet in the car on the way to work. Elliot reached over and held her hand in his. "You okay?"

"I'm good," she said softly as she smiled at him.

"I mean I know we didn't exactly plan this. We hadn't even really talked about it yet. I'm good with it. I would have liked to have spent the entire honeymoon trying to get you pregnant. But I didn't know if you were ready. You were so upset about me forgetting the pills. Are you okay with this?"

"Yeah, I'm good. I'm excited, I'm pregnant. With your baby and we are married. I couldn't be happier. I just thought you wanted to wait."

Elliot pulled the car into the parking garage and shut off the engine.

"I am so excited. I have never been happier," he said as he laced his fingers in hers and kissed her hand. "I am the luckiest man in the world."

She smiled a big smile. "We're gonna have a baby," she whispered.

"I can't believe I have to leave tonight for two weeks in Boston. I want to have a thing and tell everyone."

"Okay, I'll wait until you get back. I can kind of plan it as a welcome home thing. And we can break the news there."

"I love you so much."

"I love you, too."

He leaned in and kissed her lips. Then they walked in to work, both with big smiles on their faces.


	54. 54 Quality Time

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Fifty Four: Quality Time)_

Olivia stood with her arms wrapped tight around his neck as they waited for his plane to start boarding.

"I am going to miss you so much," she said as she buried her face against his shoulder.

John Munch turned his attention to the tabloid news paper he had purchased with his pack of gum in the gift shop. Seeing them all mushy together was almost nauseating. He was happy for them, but part of him couldn't wait until they were out of this newlywed stage and could be in the same room together without all of the lovey dovey crap. He was glad that he and Casey were not like this in public.

"Yeah," Elliot replied, "well now that we have figure out how to work that web cam…. I have my laptop with me. We could have a lot of fun that way."

She smiled and straightened his tie. "It isn't the same. Besides, you wouldn't be there to hold me afterward."

"You sure? I have my own room, so we would have a little privacy. Or we could do the phone sex thing."

"You are impossible," she joked. "But rest assured I will be here thinking about you the entire time you are gone."

"If you need anything… I asked Fin to look after you while I'm gone."

"Elliot, I am a grown woman. I can look after myself."

"I know, but it will make me feel better. And this way you aren't stuck here completely alone for two weeks. Especially in this condition," he winked at her.

"I will be fine. Lonely, but fine. And trust me, what I will be in need of while you are gone isn't something I would ask Fin for." She smiled as she stared adoringly into his eyes. "This is you," she said softly as people started lining up to board the plane.

"I have to go, baby. But I love you so much and I will think of you every second I am away."

"I'll be thinking of you too," she said twirling his tie in her fingers.

Elliot kissed her passionately as he caressed her cheek with his thumb.

"I will call you when we land."

She smiled and waved as he handed the woman his ticket and followed Munch through the double doors of the tunnel that lead to the plane. She watched through the large glass window as the plane circled the runway for a few minutes then took off. She gazed out the window until the plane was out of sight, then turned and headed back to her car a little saddened to see him go.

The first few days were the loneliest. Elliot called her about seven or eight times a day to check on her and sent her text messages all of the time to make her smile. He even sent her white roses at work, just to let her know that he missed her and was thinking about her.

"You doing alright?" Fin asked her from across the car.

"I'm okay." She answered with a sigh.

"Tough being without him, huh?"

"I miss him like crazy."

"Listen, why don't you come by my place tonight and I will cook you dinner. We can just chill and hang out. Catch some partner quality time."

"Oh, I will be okay."

"I know that. But I told Elliot I would take care of you while he is gone. Least I could do is cook you a decent meal and provide a little company for the evening. I would be honored to have the company of a beautiful woman for the evening. Engage in a little intelligent conversation."

She smiled at him. "Okay."

"Seven o'clock, my place."

"Thanks Fin."

"No problem baby girl. Look you know I am here if you ever want to talk."

"I know," she said tilting her head and grinning at him.

"Good. Now that that is settled lets go get us a bad guy," he said starting the car to go bring in their suspect.

That night she arrived at Fin's apartment right on time. He was standing at the kitchen counter cutting up vegetables for the stir fry he was making.

"Something smells good," she said sitting her purse and keys on the coffee table.

"How are you at chopping?" He asked handing her a large knife.

"Oh, I see partner. You invite me over to dinner and put me to work."

Fin laughed as she washed her hands and took the knife from him. "Yeah well, around here you gotta earn you meal."

Olivia began cutting the red and yellow and green peppers as Fin stirred the seasoned steak strips and onion in a skillet.

"I've got beer and wine," he said looking over his shoulder at her.

"You drink wine?"

"No, but I know you do."

"I'm good for now. Maybe a glass with dinner." She said settling for water from the tap.

Fin tossed the peppers into the mixture in the skillet as Olivia leaned against the counter watching him.

"I never would have guessed you could cook like this. I knew you could grill a mean steak, but not this. I guess I really don't know as much about you as I thought I did."

"Yet another benefit of spending time together. It will be ready in just a minute."

Olivia set the table and lit a candle she had found in a drawer placing it in the center. "There," she said pleased with her work.

Fin turned around to see the feminine touch she had put to the table setting. "That's nice," he said handing her a plate of food as they both took a seat.

"Oh, I almost forgot." Fin stood up and went back to the refrigerator.

"I really shouldn't," Olivia said covering her glass with her palm before he could fill it. "I mean, I know they say a glass or two now and then is okay, but it is still really early."

"What are you talking about?" Fin asked looking at her.

Olivia realized her slip and sat quiet for a minute trying to think of a quick way to recover.

"You aren't…."

She stared down at the table and took a bite of food not acknowledging his question. "This is really good," she mumbled.

Fin stared at her until she finally raised her eyes to look at him. "You are?"

Olivia stared at him with a blank look in her eyes for a few seconds. "Elliot is going to kill me!" She said running her hand over her forehead.

"He doesn't know?"

She laughed. "He knows, but we just found out the morning he left and I wasn't supposed to tell anyone. He wanted to tell everyone together. I let it slip."

"I guess congratulations are in order! Don't worry Liv, your secret is safe with me." He smiled at the thought of a little Elliot and Olivia having a baby together.

"Thanks," she said as her phone started to ring in her purse. Olivia excused herself from the table to answer it. "Speaking of my husband," she said with a smile placing the phone to her ear. "Hey baby. Oh, I am having dinner with my partner. He cooked a wonderful stir fry. I wish you were here, too." She stood next to the counter and looked up at Fin. "Listen El, I sort of messed up. I hope you aren't upset. I kind of let it slip to Fin that I'm pregnant."

"Congratulations buddy!" Fin called so Elliot could hear him on the other end of the phone.

"He said thank you and if you tell anyone he will kill you." She laughed. "Fin can keep a secret, Elliot. Okay, okay. Yes, dear. I love you, too. I will talk call you later. I love you." She closed the phone with a large smile across her face and sat back down to eat. "At least he isn't mad."

Fin shook his head. "He can't stay mad at you anyway. Especially not now. He never could. You have always had a way with him."

"What does that mean?"

"It means he has always had a soft spot for you. He can be tough and get pissed off at the rest of us, but never you. You two have always understood each other. That is part of what made you such great partners."

She looked at him for a minute thinking about what he had said.

"That is what makes you such a great couple. You have an amazing chemistry together."

"Yes, we are a good couple. But sometimes I worry if we will be good parents. Well, not Elliot. I have seen him in action. This is number six for him so this one will be a breeze I am sure. But I have never done this before. What if I am bad at it Fin?"

"Na. You are going to be a great mother. And with the gene pool here, you guys are going to have an amazing kid."

She smiled at him, "thank you."

"I just hope this kid gets your looks! Elliot aint bad, but in this case getting looks from him instead of your stunningly gorgeous mother would be the short end of the genetic stick."

Olivia shook her head and laughed. "Flattery can't save you from the hormonal psychopath I will soon become, Fin. You will just have to tough it out like every other member of the male species."

"Seriously though. If this kid is anything like you or Elliot, he or she is going to be incredible. I am excited for you guys."

"Thanks partner," she said with a grin raising her water glass to tap his beer bottle across the table and they both took a drink.


	55. 55 Trust Issues

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Fifty Five: Trust Issues)_

It was just after two thirty in the morning when she got the call on the house phone. Olivia sat up in her bed and batted her eyes in an attempt to wake them from their heave slumber. She hadn't been sleeping that well lately. Between the pregnancy and Elliot not being gone and not laying in the bed beside her she tossed and turned practically all night. She sighed and stood up walking through the dark apartment to try to find the handset to the cordless phone, wherever she may have left it.

The only person who would normally call her late was Elliot and he would have called her cell phone. Something must be wrong. She looked at the number that flashed across the caller ID but didn't recognize it. Olivia turned on the phone and raised it to her ear listening for a second before she said anything.

"Hello," she said cautiously.

It was quiet for a second. "Olivia?" A voice said from the other end of the line. The girl was crying and her voice trembling.

"Maureen? Honey, are you okay?" Olivia felt a knot ball up in her stomach.

"I need…." she paused for a minute. "I am sorry to call so late."

"Baby, it's okay. What's going on?"

Maureen was sobbing and Olivia could tell she was terrified.

"I am stranded. I can't call my mom. Daddy's going to kill me."

Olivia heard the operator recording come over the payphone. "Please deposit one dollar for the next four minutes!"

"I don't have my purse," the weary voice said and Olivia could tell she was crying again.

"Maureen, tell me where you are and I will come and get you." Olivia was already half dressed by now and looking for her keys.

Maureen gave her the address. It was in a really rough neighborhood.

"Please don't be mad," she cried.

"Maureen, I'm not mad. Look I am on my way. Stay put I will be there as soon as I can."

"Thank you," she said softly and the call disconnected.

Olivia looked down at the envelope she had scribbled the address on. It would take her twenty minutes at the very least to reach her.

"Fin," she said aloud.

The address was only a mile or two from Fin's apartment. Olivia grabbed her cell phone and called Fin oh her way to the car.

"Come on, come on." She chanted almost religiously during each ring.

"Tutuola," Fin almost growled in a tired voice.

"Fin, it's Liv. I am sorry to wake you. Listen I need a huge favor and I don't really have time to explain."

"Sure," he answered.

"Maureen just called me from a pay phone crying. I am on my way to pick her up, but it will take me at least twenty minutes to get there. The street she gave me is only a few miles from your place, but it is a really bad neighborhood. Fin, she sounded really scared."

"Okay, I'll go pick her up and meet you back here. She knows me."

"Thanks, partner."

Olivia drove toward Fin's apartment. She wondered what Maureen was doing in that neighborhood anyway, it was no where near Hudson University dorms where she was supposed to be. A few minutes later Fin called her back.

"Liv, what was the address again?"

Olivia repeated it to him. "It's a payphone."

"I'm looking at it Liv, I don't see her. I have been circling, but there is no sign of her."

"Keep looking Fin, she has to be there somewhere. I'm almost there."

Olivia reached into the glove box of her car and pulled out her off duty weapon. She steered the car with one hand as she ejected the clip with the other making sure it was loaded. She counted the rounds then slid the clip back into the gun and laid it in the seat beside her.

A few minutes later she pulled her car up in front of the payphone. Fin pulled in behind her.

"I have circled the block six times. I don't see anyone."

"Shit! I have to find her Fin. I promised her it would be okay."

"We're going to find her, Liv." He patted her on the back as they both walked around the payphone for signs that Maureen had been there.

"Listen," Fin said getting quiet for a moment. "This way."

Olivia followed him down a dark alley where a car was parked and two people were arguing. As they approached the couple the man reached up and slapped the woman hard across the face. Fin and Olivia rushed forward to assist the woman. A few more steps and Olivia could see Maureen's face as she held her hand to her cheek bone where the man had hit her.

Olivia turned and grabbed the guy by the back of the collar and slammed him up against the hood of the car.

"Get your fucking hands off my kid!" She growled angrily, before she even realized what she had done.

Fin shot a look at her. Olivia took a deep breath and let go of the young man. She looked up at Maureen who was still crying.

"Are you okay?" She asked.

Maureen nodded her head.

Olivia brushed her hair out of her eyes and hugged her tight. Maureen's obviously intoxicated boyfriend turned to look at Olivia and Maureen together.

"Oh, mommy's hot too." He reached out and ran his hand down the center of Olivia's back.

Olivia let go of Maureen and grabbed the guy by the arm, twisting it around behind his back and throwing him down onto the car again. He struggled with her and cursed at her. He broke a hand free and swung trying to hit Liv in the face but was blocked by Fin's fist.

Fin slammed him against the car and cuffed his wrists behind his back.

"Maureen," Olivia said looking at the girl.

Maureen shifted her teary eyes to look into Olivia's.

"It's okay." Olivia tossed her the car keys. "Why don't you wait for me in my car?"

"Okay," she whispered.

Fin read the man his rights and put him in the back of his car.

"You okay?" He asked looking into Olivia's eyes.

"Yeah, I'm good."

"Liv?" Fin stared at her without even blinking.

"I said I'm fine."

"You about broke that kids arm."

"He attacked her!"

"I know, I saw that. But that isn't all I saw."

Her eyes flashed to his and she panted heavily.

"You don't know what you are talking about." She said with a glare.

Fin grabbed her arm and pulled her away from the car so the suspect couldn't hear them.

Olivia pushed her long sleeves up her arm and brushed her hair behind her ears.

"I know and so do you," he said sternly as she refused to look into his face. "Now, we are on the same side here. But you just assaulted that kid. And I am just really hoping that he don't got the brains in his head to think about pressing charges."

Olivia jerked her arm free of Fin's hand and turned to walk back to her car.

"Liv?"

"What?" She shouted looking back at him as she spun around to face him.

Fin walked over to her and stood facing her. "I know where you were."

"I lost it," she said as a single tear rolled down her cheek.

"I got kids, too."

"Listen, I am going to do everything I can to keep you from going down for this. But it would probably go easier on you if she didn't…"

Olivia looked up at him unable to believe what she was hearing him say.

"You think I should convince her not to press charges, so that he wont press charges against me? I am not going to hang her out to dry like that!"

"You could be in a world of trouble. If they put an assault charge in your jacket, you could lose your job."

"I won't turn on her like that! I'm a big girl Fin. I lost control for a minute. And if he turned me in I will suffer the consequences for my actions."

"I understand you trying to do the right thing here Liv, but think of all you got to lose."

"What kind of example would I be setting Fin? I have to go. I need to get her home and make sure she is alright."

"Are you sure you are alright?"

"I'm fine," she said softly.

"Okay, I'm going to take Romeo here in and book him for public intoxication. Leave him ass in the drunk tank overnight. But they will let him go in 24 hours if she chooses not to press charges."

"I will talk to her. Call me later and let me know what is going on."

"Yeah." Fin turned to walk back to his car.

"Fin." Olivia called out to him.

"Yeah," he said turning around again to look at her.

"Thanks."

"Yeah."

Olivia got into the car and turned on the ignition.

"You okay?" She asked looking at Maureen who had now stopped crying.

"I'm okay. Olivia, I'm sorry."

"Honey, none of this is your fault. Everything is going to be okay."

"Fin is taking him in and going to hold him overnight. But you need to decide if you want to press charges."

Maureen took a deep, staggered breath.

"You don't have to decide right now. Take a little time to think about it. I was thinking I would just take you home with me for now. I can take you back to the dorm in the morning. If that is okay with you?"

"I'd like that," Maureen said forcing a smile.

"Okay," Olivia said softly as she smiled at Maureen.

"I tried to call daddy, but it just kept ringing."

"He is in Boston and wont be home until tomorrow. He might be out of range."

"I couldn't call mom. She would just freak out and yell at me for being here in the first place."

Olivia turned her head to look at Maureen.

"I didn't have my purse or cell and all I could remember was the house number. I'm sorry."

"Maureen, you did the right thing. You call me when ever you need me. I don't care what time of day it is. I will be here."

Maureen smiled at Olivia and took a deep breath.

Once they got back to the apartment Olivia gave her some clothes and fixed her some hot tea while Maureen took a shower and got cleaned up. She had been wearing a navy mini dress and one of the spaghetti straps was busted from the struggle with her boyfriend. Olivia couldn't help but wonder if anything else had happened that Maureen wasn't telling her.

Maureen walked slowly back into the living room and seated herself on the couch. Olivia brought her a mug of hot tea and sat beside her.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Olivia asked in her best motherly voice.

Maureen stared into her cup for a minute as she began to cry again. She wiped tears from her cheek and began.

"We've been dating for about six months now. He has never acted like this before. Lately he has been kind of acting strange. Tonight he said he was taking me out. So I got dressed up. I thought he meant dinner or a club maybe. We got in the car and he drove, is seemed like he drove forever. I found a bag in the floor and there were drugs inside. I guess he was delivering for someone. I got upset and he told me to grow up. We got to the club about an hour after he delivered the package. But when we went inside."

She paused and took a deep breath. "It was some kind of sex club. I wanted to leave. He told me it would be alright and kissed me. He said I was prettier than all of the other girls there. I begged him to leave. He held my hand and lead me back to this room and there were couples in there having sex. There were women dancing on stage. He was just talking to some people and I sat at the bar. A few minutes later he was kissing all over another girl. I got upset and ran out. I left my purse in his car. I ran a couple of blocks and that was when I called you from the payphone."

"So how did you end up in the alley?"

"I was waiting for you when I saw his car. I didn't want to talk to him. So I walked toward into the alley. He pulled the car in behind me and grabbed a hold of me. The strap of my dress broke. We fought. I told him it was over. I yelled at him and he hit me. That is when you guys came in."

"Maureen, he didn't do anything else to hurt you…"

"No."

"I'm glad your okay. I'm glad you called me." Olivia ran her fingers over Maureen's hair.

Olivia exhaled. And walked back into the kitchen. "I turned down your bed for you. Are you hungry? I could fix you something."

She looked back at Maureen who was crying again.

"There's more," she whispered through tears.

Olivia walked back toward her as Maureen stood up and walked to the kitchen meeting her half way.

"I'm so scared."

"Maureen, what is it?"

Maureen stared at the floor as if she were ashamed of what she was about to say.

"I think I'm pregnant," she mumbled softly refusing to look Olivia in the eye fearing the disappointment she might find there.

Olivia stood quiet for a minute trying to think. She took a deep breath and hugged Maureen. She felt the girl tremble a little and bury her face into Olivia's collarbone as she continued to cry.

Olivia held her and comforted her for a few minutes. "Everything is going to be okay," Olivia gulped unsure of how to make this better.

"My dad is going to kill me," Maureen gasped.

Olivia sat Maureen down on the couch as she stared into her face and brushed away her tears. "We're going to figure this out."

Maureen batted her foggy blue eyes at Olivia.

Olivia took another deep breath and sat down beside her on the couch. "Why don't you wait here and I'll go to the Walgreen's down the block and get a test. It won't take long and then you will know. You don't even have to do it here if you don't want to. I can get it for you and you can take it alone if you would rather. But you will know for sure."

Maureen nodded her head.

Olivia pulled a blanket off the back of the couch and wrapped it around her shoulders. "Do you need anything else while I'm out?"

"No," she said softly.

"Help yourself to anything in the kitchen. Make yourself at home. I will be right back."

Maureen smiled at Olivia. "Thank you."

"You're welcome sweetheart." Olivia said returning the smile.

Twenty minutes later Olivia returned to the apartment with her purchase. Maureen was in the girls room reading one of Olivia's crime novels.

"Hey," Liv said softly leaning against the door frame to look at her.

"Hey," Maureen said with a weary smile.

Olivia carried the box into the room and handed it to her.

"You don't have to do this now. If you would rather be alone, I understand."

"No," she said standing from the bed. "I don't think I could do this alone."

Olivia looked at her trying to imagine how scared she must be. Barely nineteen and a college student finding out that she may be expecting. "No matter how this works out. I'm going to do whatever I can to help you. You are not alone in this."

Maureen squeezed her hand and headed for the bathroom with the box.

She came back out a few minutes later holding her breath. "Now I just have to wait."

Olivia handed her another cup of tea. "Just a few more minutes."

Maureen smiled at her again.

Three minutes later Olivia held her hand as Maureen picked up the little white plastic stick off the counter and looked down at it.

Olivia held her breath and felt a lump in her throat when a tear fell from Maureen's eye and rolled slowly down her cheek.

She was quiet for a few seconds then turned to look at Olivia. She laughed a little nervously, "it's negative." She said smiling again as she hugged Olivia. "Thank God!"

Olivia laughed nervously as they both walked into the living room and sat on the couch. "How about some ice cream?" She said with a smile heading to the freezer.

Maureen laughed. "It is almost five o'clock in the morning and you want to eat ice cream?"

"I got it while I was out. I thought either way we could use it. Ice cream always make me feel better."

"Maybe a little," Maureen smiled at her and seated herself at the counter.

The two of them laughed and talked for half an hour.

Olivia watched her smile fade as a serious look crossed Maureen's face.

"Are you going to tell my dad about this?" She asked looking up at Olivia.

Olivia exhaled. She herself had been wondering the exact same thing. "I don't know. We don't keep things from each other."

"Olivia, please don't."

"I can't lie to him, Maureen."

"I know. I don't want you to. He is just going to be so upset and so disappointed in me." She was crying again.

"I think a lot of that has to do with the fact that you guys have always been so close. You are daddy's little girl. It is hard for him to see that you have grown up. He loves you so much. We both do. He is over protective, yes, but it is just because he loves you so much."

"Yeah. That is why it is going to hurt him so bad."

Olivia took a deep breath she was torn. She reached across the counter and held Maureen's hand in hers. "He needs to know about the assault. But maybe it would be better if we just kept the rest of this between us girls." She felt her stomach drop and was almost nauseated as the words came out of her mouth. She had never kept secrets from him before. But is she told him this one it could destroy his relationship with his daughter.

"I have decided I want to press charges. And it is completely over with him. Olivia, this wont happen again."

"We all make mistakes Maureen. The key is to learn from them. You are a very smart girl."

"Thank you," Maureen replied as she stood to hug Olivia again.

"You're welcome honey."

"I think I'm gonna go on to bed. It is after six."

"Your dad comes in today. You should stick around and go with me to pick him up. He'll really glad to see you."

"Okay," she said with her father's smile.

Olivia moved back to her room and tried to settle in and get some rest, but it was no use. She watched part of a movie on television for the next hour then started reading a book. About an hour in she heard a noise in the living room. Thinking it was Maureen she walked down the hall to talk to her. There in the living room with a pile of luggage at his feet stood Elliot.

"Oh my God," she said throwing her arms around him and leaping into his arms. She kissed his passionately like it had been years. "I missed you so much."

"I missed you too, angel." He said placing another kiss on her lips and lowering her back to the ground.

"I thought your flight didn't come in until this afternoon."

"It didn't. But we were finished and I wised my wife so I took an earlier flight back to surprise you."

"What a wonderful surprise!" She said with a smile. "Oh, shhh!" She whispered leading him down the hall by the hand. She opened the bedroom door as he peered in and saw Maureen sleeping soundly.

Elliot walked in and kissed her forehead and tucked her in like he did when she was a child. He walked back into the hall closing the door behind him.

"What is she doing here?"

"Long story." Olivia lead him by the hand back to the living room to try and explain.

Elliot listened as she reviewed the details with him. "She is going to press charges, right?"

"She said she wants to. But I didn't want to push her. I told her it was her decision."

"I'll take her down later to file."

"I love you," Olivia said staring at him. "I am so glad you are home."

"I love you too, baby." Elliot leaned and kissed her once more. "We should try to get some sleep. I didn't sleep much last night either. Red eye flight and a lot of turbulence."

"Poor baby," she said leaning in to kiss him as she undid his tie and slid it off his collar.

"How long has she been asleep?"

"A few hours, why?"

"I was thinking maybe we could fool around. If you're not too tired, that is."

"I am never too tired for amazing sex with my husband. Besides, I have not seen you in two whole weeks," she said kissing him again.

"We'll have to keep it quiet."

"I think I can handle that."

"Oh you can, huh?"

"Yes, I can." She said as he kissed her then picked her up and carried her down the hall to their bedroom to make up for lost time.

A few hours later they shared a late brunch with Maureen before Elliot took her to the station to file the charges against her boyfriend. Afterward he took Maureen back to the dorm then returned home.

That evening Olivia was in the shower in their bathroom so he used the main bathroom instead. When she got out of the shower he was sitting on the bed and wanted to talk.

"What's going on?" She asked looking at him.

Elliot looked at her almost saddened. "You're not pregnant?"

"What? No, I am. Nine weeks. I had my first appointment yesterday."

Elliot looked confused. "Then where did the test in the trash come from?"

She took a deep breath and sat on the bed next to him. "It isn't mine," she said softly.

He looked at her for a second then his eyes looked at her angrily. "Maureen?"

"El…"

"It was Maureen?"

"Yes."

"And you weren't going to tell me?"

"She isn't pregnant."

"I should still know Olivia, I'm her father." He stood up and walked down the hall toward the living room.

"I know. I screwed up."

"How could you not tell me?" She shouted at her.

Olivia felt tears fill her eyes, he had never been so angry with her.

"She asked me not to!" She almost yelled back at him. "She trusted me, Elliot. I couldn't betray her like that."

"I'm her father!"

"I know that! And I felt horrible for keeping it from you! But she is an adult now. And for some reason she didn't feel ready for you to know. She needed someone to be there for her Elliot. Would you rather I turned my back on her and let her go through this alone?"

"Of course not!"

Olivia was crying. "It was wrong and I am sorry. But I did what I thought was best for Maureen. You have to realize Elliot, she is not a little girl anymore! You were out of town and she didn't feel comfortable turning to Kathy. She needed someone and she called me. I am sorry if I hurt you by being there for her, but I wouldn't turn my back on her." Olivia took a staggered breath and went into the bedroom and broke down crying.

This was their real fight. Not just since they were married, but ever. She betrayed him by trying to protect Maureen. And she felt horrible about it. All the good she had tried so hard to do had just blown up in her face. And to make matters worse, she for the first time since she had known him, had just given Elliot a reason not to trust her. She curled up in the bed and cried herself to sleep.


	56. 56 Realization

**I AM SO SORRY FOR THE MIX UP IN POSTING THIS!!! **

Immediate Danger

(Chapter Fifty Six: Realization)

_Elliot sat in the living room watching television thinking about the way he had gotten upset with her. It had been almost three hours now since Olivia had gone to bed alone and it was eating at him that he let her feel bad for trying to help out. Part of him was a little hurt that she hadn't told him the entire story, but another part of him understood why she had done what she did and he was not completely sure that he wouldn't have made to same decision if her were put in a similar situation._

_Elliot picked up the remote control and turned off the television. He had to make this right. He turned off the lights and headed to the bedroom. When he opened the door Olivia was curled up in the bed holding his pillow. She had fallen asleep crying._

_She stirred a little as Elliot tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. He kicked his shoes off and crawled into the bed beside her. _

"_Olivia," he whispered softly as he kissed the tip of her nose. "Baby, wake up."_

_She groaned a little as she moved around in the bed. It was now almost three o'clock in the morning, but this couldn't wait until tomorrow. He wouldn't let her spend the rest of the night thinking he was angry with her._

_Elliot rubbed his hand gently over her back and kissed her lips softly. "Liv?"_

"_Yeah," she mumbled without opening her eyes._

"_Honey, wake up for a minute. I need to talk to you and it is important."_

_She moaned softly._

"_Baby, it can't wait until tomorrow."_

_She took a deep breath and her eyes fluttered open to look into his. Elliot laid across from her one the bed so they were face to face._

"_Hi," she said softly._

"_Hi," he said smiling at her. "Can I talk to you for a few minutes?"_

"_Okay," she whispered as she sat up in the bed and leaned back against the headboard with a pillow behind her back. She turned her eyes to look into his and then a worried look crossed her face as if she had forgotten until that moment that they had been fighting. _

"_Olivia, I'm sorry. I am sorry I yelled at you. I am sorry I second guessed your judgment. I am sorry I was a jerk and had to sit in there and think about it while you laid in here and cried yourself to sleep. Baby, I know that you would never hurt any of the kids. And I know that you would do anything for them. Maureen needed someone to trust and not only does it make me feel good that she felt comfortable coming to you, but that you did everything in your power to protect her and help her out. And the more I thought about it the more I realized you were right, about everything. I know that sometimes there are going to be things you just cannot tell me. And I want you to know that I do trust you. I trust you enough to know that if there is something I need to know about anything, especially the kids you will tell me. Baby, I love you more than anything in the world. You and these kids are my life. You are my wife now, Olivia and more importantly a parent of my children. I never would have asked you to marry me if I didn't think I could trust you with the kids. This whole fight was stupid and from now on I am going to try to control myself and realize that my grown up children are going to be facing grown up problems. And they are not always going to be able to talk to dad. I am lucky to have someone as wonderful as you in my life, in their lives. I love you so much baby. And I am so sorry."_

"_I love you, too. Elliot, I hated keeping it from you, but she trusted me. I told her from the start that I could not lie to you. It is just hard for a young woman to talk to her father about birth control and pregnancy tests."_

"_It's hard for a father to admit that his daughter has to worry about birth control and pregnancy tests. My baby isn't a baby anymore. God Liv, do you realize how lose we just came to becoming grandparents?"_

_She smiled at him._

"_That scares the hell out of me! Don't get me wrong, I want dozens of grandchildren. I just want them when Maureen is like forty." Olivia smiled. He looked at her and placed his hands against her abdomen. "And our grandchild would have been the same age as our baby." _

"_Well, Maureen is a smart girl Elliot. She is a strong, wonderful young woman. She learned a few tough lessons about life the other night and I hate that it was so hard on her, but I know that she will never allow herself into those situations again. She also asked me to go with her to see my doctor and check into other birth control options. She asked me and I told her I would take her."_

"_Nice," Elliot brushed his hand over his forehead._

"_Honey, at least we will know that she is being safe."_

"_Okay Liv, that kind of stuff is the stuff you don't have to share with me."_

_Olivia laughed. "I just wanted to let you know that she is being safe about it. Besides she and Romeo are broke up now, so I am sure it will be at least a little while before she finds another Mr. Right."_

"_Did you tell her about the baby?"_

"_No, I didn't get a chance. Things were all happening so quickly."_

"_Well, I love you and it is really late and we should get to sleep."_

"_Yeah," she said kissing him._

_They laid down across the bed and Elliot turned out the light._

"_Liv?"_

"_Yes?"_

"_Let's not do this anymore. I hate fighting with you. It just makes us both miserable. Then I get defensive and become a big jerk and make you cry and I feel like crap for being so mean to you. It just isn't good."_

"_El?"_

"_Yes?"_

_She snuggled in against his chest and looked up into his eyes as she kissed him. "You might be a big jerk sometimes, but you are my big jerk and I love you more than anything."_

"_I love you too, baby doll." _

_Elliot pulled her against him tight and turned off the light. _


	57. 57 Plans For The Future

_**Immediate Danger**_

_**(Chapter Fifty Seven: Plans For The Future)**_

**Olivia sat at her desk with her hand on her belly as she felt the baby kicking inside her. She was nearly four and a half months along now and it had been several weeks since they had announced to everyone that they were expecting. Since their little announcement and the appearance of her small but noticeable baby belly, Cragen had pretty much put her on desk duty. **

**She raised her head and scanned the room with her eyes. She was bored out of her mind and looking for someone to carry on a decent conversation with. Nobody. She took a deep breath and pulled a few ones from her purse and headed for the soda machine with one hand on her belly. She stared at the selections for a few minutes.**

"**Caffeine, caffeine, caffeine," she exhaled and hit the button for a bottle of water. Then turned and headed back to her desk. Her morning sickness was starting to set in again. She had experienced a lot of it lately and it was not just limited to mornings. Sometimes it would be the look of something or a smell that would send her running for the ladies room and sometimes it would just happen for no reason at all. **

**Olivia sat down opening the drawer of her desk and pulling a package of saltines from the stash she kept there. She groaned a little and opened the package. She looked at her watch. She was supposed to have lunch with Elliot today and she was starving. But she had been nauseous all morning. Anymore she got sick if she ate anything too early in the morning and sicker if she didn't eat anything at all, so she really had to strategically plan her meals. If Elliot didn't get back soon, she was going to have to settle for something less than appealing from the vending machines down the hall. **

**She picked up her phone and typed out a text to Elliot asking if he had any idea how long he would be. She hit send and closed the phone as she heard her stomach growl. She tipped her head back and closed her eyes as she felt the baby kicking wildly inside her. **

"**Come on El," she mumbled to herself as she felt his kiss against the side of her neck. She smiled and turned around throwing her arms around him as she kissed his lips. **

"**Hey baby," he said sweetly as he placed a soft kiss against her lips. He looked down at the crackers on her desk. "Are you sick again?"**

"**I'm always sick Elliot."**

"**I'm sorry I am so late getting back here. You okay to go eat or do you just want me to order in and we can go sit upstairs?"**

**She smiled as she stood up and kissed him again. "I think I'm okay, I just need to eat something remotely soon or I am going to throw up again. But first I have to pee."**

**Elliot smiled, "you are the most beautiful pregnant woman I have ever seen."**

**She smiled again as Elliot smoothed little circles over the bump that housed their child. **

"**How is she doing today?"**

"**Very active this morning. Elliot, we don't even know what the baby's sex is yet. Now until my appointment tomorrow afternoon, because your daughter or son would not cooperate last time."**

"**It's a girl. I can feel it."**

"**Yeah, I feel it too and right now it is kicking the hell out of my bladder." She kissed him and moved toward the ladies room. "Give me a minute."**

"**It will give me time to check my messages."**

**Elliot moved toward his desk across the room and picked up the phone dialing his voicemail box.**

**A few minutes later Olivia returned and they were on their way. He drove them across town to one of her favorite restaurants. They sat at a table in the back and had pretty much the entire section to themselves. **

"**What time is your appointment?" He asked as she nibbled on a bread stick waiting for their food to arrive.**

"**Two o'clock. Do you think you will be able to make it?"**

"**Are you kidding me? I wouldn't miss it for the world."**

**Olivia smiled pleased with his answer. He had been so wonderful and supportive through her pregnancy so far and she was so glad that she had him to share this with. **

"**I just didn't know, I mean with everything being so busy if Cragen could spare you."**

"**Fin said he'd cover for me. I'll probably have to go back for a few hours after, but I am not going to miss this."**

"**Good," she said smiling at him. "I really want you to be there with me." She reached across the table and locked her fingers in his. "I love you."**

"**I love you too, Angel." Elliot leaned over and kissed her lips. "You know we still have not picked out any names."**

"**I know, I don't even know where to start. I have been looking through my baby name book but there are so many I like. I can't make up my mind. Do you have any ideas?"**

"**I'm not sure yet," he said holding her hand. Elliot had learned from Kathy with the last five pregnancies that it is better to let her suggest the names and then choose from them. Of their five children, Dickie was the only one Elliot had named. Dickie being short for Richard, Elliot's father. "I'm sure we'll come up with something."**

"**I thought we could let the kids help us come up with names. Or at least allow them to make some suggestions. I want them to be involved in this or at least to have the opportunity to as much as they would like to."**

"**I think that is a great idea. And they will love it."**

"**It will also help once we know the baby's sex."**

"**I'm telling you it is a girl."**

**She smiled and laughed a little at him. "Okay, but I think we should pick out a boy name and a girl name just in case. I have a friend who has a five year old daughter named Charlie. They chose Charlie because all the way through her pregnancy her doctor's sonograms told her she was having a boy, they chose to name him Charles after his father. Low and behold they had a girl. I want to be prepared."**

"**Yes, ma'am." Elliot smiled at her and she grinned back at him.**

**After lunch they returned to work. Elliot kissed her good bye and was off again. She sat at the desk once more and rubbed her hand gently against the outside of her belly as the baby settled down and laid still. Olivia smiled. **_**She**_** must be sleeping, she thought as she picked up her pen and went back to work.**

**The next day Elliot took Olivia to her appointment. Just as he had predicted, they were having a little girl. Olivia smiled at the news. She didn't really care either way as long as the baby was healthy and preferably full term, but now that she knew for sure this was their daughter inside her she was excited it was a girl. **

**They returned to work and broke the news to everyone there. Elliot called all of the kids to tell them they were having a little sister. Olivia sat at her desk and watched him as he smiled proudly walking around the lobby outside the glass double doors calling each of the children and bragging that the baby was a girl. She loved that even after five children, three of them girls, he was so excited about this pregnancy. He was such a wonderful father. Of course if you counted her son that they lost, the numbers were even. **

**That evening on the drive home from work Elliot took a trip through a suburb. Olivia watched him as he seemed to be looking for something.**

"**El, what are you doing?"**

"**There is something I want to show you," he said as he turned down a side street.**

**The street was wide and the houses that lined both sides were fairly new and beautiful. She was familiar with this neighborhood and it just happened to have one of the best preschools in the district and was within blocks from a private school as well. Olivia didn't normally think like this. But your entire outlook on the world changes once you find out you are going to be a mother and you cannot help but notice these things.**

**Elliot pulled up to a beautiful house with a large front porch. The front of it looked like something from a magazine. He pulled in to the drive way next to the realty sign in the front yard as a man stepped out on to the porch.**

"**Elliot, they are home. We shouldn't be here," she said looking like they had just been caught.**

**Elliot took her hand in his. "It's okay, I have an appointment," he said with a smile and kissed her lips.**

"**What?"**

"**I saw it a few days ago as Munch and I drove through the neighborhood. I have found myself driving past it about a dozen more times since. Finally, I picked up the phone and called the number. This is the agent meeting us to look at the house."**

"**El…." She started as he leaned in to kiss her.**

"**It does not hurt to look," he said with a smile as he climbed from the car and walked around to her door opening it and helping her from the car.**

**The real estate agent approached them and introduced himself. He was very polite and smiled a lot, Olivia noted to herself. He took them inside and showed them around the house. It was two stories with a finished basement. It had a total of five large bedrooms and three full bathrooms. Perfect for a family with six children. Even if they didn't have them all of the time. **

**The downstairs had a large kitchen with a bar and connected to a large eat in dining room. Off the dining room was a parlor area for entertaining and a formal dining room. The family room area was plenty big enough for future Christmases with all six children. And the master bedroom and a smaller bedroom were on this floor. Perfect for them and the baby. There was a full master bath off what would be their bedroom and another large full bathroom down the hall across from the room that would be the nursery.**

**Upstairs the other three bedrooms, all good sized. And another full bathroom. The basement had a large den area and with a half bath. It would be perfect for the kids TV room or even to double as a guest room. The laundry room and another large room were in the basement as well. And it was fully carpeted. **

**Back upstairs they walked through the kitchen and out into the large privacy fenced back yard. **

"**I love this," Olivia gasped as they walked out on to the deck. The big yard would give plenty of room for the little kids to play safe from the street out front and passers by.**

"**I thought you would," the realtor pointed out to Olivia.**

**She stood on the large deck and tried to picture Elliot cooking at the grill as they watched the kids play in the yard. A large smile crossed her face as Elliot walked up behind her and wrapped his arms around her locking his fingers in hers and holding her hands.**

"**I will wait inside and give the two of you a little time to discuss this," the man said as he walked back inside.**

"**What do you think?" Elliot asked as he placed a kiss against her ear.**

"**I think it is beautiful," she said with a smile.**

"**I wanted you to see it. I want to make an offer."**

"**Elliot," she said turning to look at him. "We can't afford this house."**

"**You let me worry about that."**

"**El, be realistic here. There is no way. Not in this neighborhood."**

"**Well, if we lived here I could sell my apartment. You are renting yours out. And we are getting a really good deal."**

"**How good?"**

"**Amazing! Liv, we would be paying a fraction of what the property is worth. The people who owned it before got divorced. They let the bank repossess it and now the bank is selling for what is owed on it. Baby, I promised you I would buy you a house. And this house is perfect for our family. It is in a good neighborhood. We're out of the city, but still close. Closer to Kathy and the kids. Big enough that we have room for them all at once. Three blocks from one of the best preschools in the state. And a private school six blocks from here. We would have the best of both worlds here."**

"**It is nice. And I love the fenced yard."**

"**You could stand at the kitchen window or the sliding glass doors and watch our little girl play in her own back yard. We can set up a swing set, maybe a sand box. As the little kids get older, I'd like to even put in a pool. It has a two car attached garage. And it is heated! That will be wonderful once the baby arrives. We won't have to carry her inside through rain or snow and risk her getting sick. Or if you would rather, we could keep looking around for something else. But Olivia, I promise you we are never going to find a deal this great on a house like this in this great a neighborhood."**

"**Can we have a little time to think about it?"**

"**Let's go talk to the man."**

**She smiled and Elliot kissed her gently and rubbed his hand over her belly as their little girl kicked his hand.**

"**See, she likes it."**

**Olivia laughed. "That is cheating."**

"**How is that cheating?"**

"**Because she hears your voice and she knows her daddy. You can always get her to kick, even when I can't."**

"**She's daddy's girl." Elliot laughed. "And you're my girl."**

**Olivia smiled as he kissed her and lead her into the living room to talk to the man about the house. Before it was all said and done they had made an offer and were supposed to find out in the next few days if the bank would accept it. **

**Four days later they still hadn't heard anything about the house. Olivia was trying not to get her hopes up because it wasn't likely they could afford anything close to what the bank was wanting for the house. It would be so perfect for them though. She had finished a very large stack of paperwork early and was playing solitaire on her computer when she decided to get online and start looking at things for the baby's nursery. Now that she knew their precious bundle was a little girl she had more of an idea of what she wanted.**

**An hour or so later Elliot came across the room with the phone to his ear. Olivia looked up at him confused wondering who he could be talking to. He hung up the phone and smiled at her. **

"**You think you could cut out of here a couple of hours early today?"**

"**Sure, why?"**

"**Because that was the bank and they want us to come in and sign the paperwork on our new house."**

"**Really?"**

"**Yes."**

**She squealed with excitement. "Oh my God! We just bought a house!"**

"**Well baby, we are buying a house. We have to go sign the paperwork on it before it is officially ours."**

**Olivia threw her arms around him and hugged him as tight as she could with a belly in the way. **

**They headed across town and signed all of the paperwork and picked up their keys. From there they went to the house to walk through one more time and see where they would be living out their dreams together. **

**Olivia laughed as Elliot picked her up and carried her over the threshold. He stood her back on her feet and held her hand as they walked through the entire house talking about wall paper and carpet and paint and themes for the nursery. **

**That night while they were laying in bed trying to contain their excitement enough to go to sleep Olivia settled in against him and kissed him tenderly. **

"**Thank you," she said softly.**

"**For what sweetheart?"**

**She looked into his eyes and smiled at him. "For making all of my dreams come true."**

**Elliot kissed her forehead and rubbed his hand gently over her belly. Olivia slid back and leaned against her pillow as she handed him her Shea butter lotion and she raised her tank top to reveal her belly. Elliot smoothed the lotion over her belly as he rubbed it in. This had become a nightly thing for them. She would relax and let him rub lotion on her belly and most of the time he would kiss it and talk to his daughter inside. Olivia thought it was the sweetest thing she had ever seen. **

"**Goodnight little Angel," Elliot whispered as he kissed the bare skin of her belly and the baby moved. He rolled her tank top back down to cover it and brought the blankets up around her as she smiled at him with tears in her eyes.**

"**I love when you talk to her. She settles down and gets really still to listen to your voice. I think it is so sweet."**

"**I think you are sweet," he said placing a kiss against her lips. "Have you thought of any names for her yet?"**

"**Well, I have a two page list from the kids. It's a start. But nothing for certain."**

"**Have you though of anything?"**

"**I really have not had time to think about it. But I was thinking we should sit down with a baby name book, you and me and come up with a few. See how she likes them."**

**Olivia smiled. "How about tomorrow night? We can go to bed a little early and sit and read it together."**

"**It's a date!"**

**She smiled and Elliot kissed her then she turned out the light. She settled back in against him for the night. **

**The next day Elliot called the movers and the real estate company and listed his apartment. He brought home a load of boxes so they could start packing things. The movers would have all of their big things moved in that weekend and come in next week for the last of the boxes. They had a lot to get done in just a short amount of time. **

**A month past and they were settling in to their new home. But that was not the only change in their lives. They had traded in Olivia's sporty two door car for a classy but more family friendly black Lexus SUV. And tonight he had to work late and came home with a surprise.**

**Elliot walked in to the living room and called for Olivia. When she walked in he looked her in the eye and smiled.**

"**What do you think?"**

"**About what?" She asked with a smile.**

**Elliot stepped aside to reveal a eight week old Golden Retriever puppy with a big red bow around it's neck. **

"**Aww," she cooed as she knelt to the floor and scooped the dog up in her arms. "Elliot…." she lifted the dog up to look under it's belly. "She's beautiful." She kissed the dog on the top of her head and looked up at him. "Where did you get her?"**

"**Would you believe me if I told you she followed me home?"**

**Olivia smiled at him. "John and I were in Jersey questioning a guy today. We stopped to talk to someone who worked in a mall. While we were there we walked past a pet store and I saw her. She was the last puppy in the window and I couldn't let her stay there all alone. Plus I figured we have a house now and a yard. It's about time we had a family dog. And she will grow up with the baby. I have two days to return her if you don't want to keep her. I should have talked to you first, but I wanted to surprise you."**

"**No El, she's perfect. Only…"**

"**Only, what?"**

"**Well, now we have to come up with two little girl names."**

**He smiled and kissed her. "I need to run out to my car and get the kennel and stuff I got for her. I was thinking I would put up a pen out behind the garage."**

"**I want her to be inside," Olivia cut him off.**

"**I mean so that when we let her out she has her own area and there is not dog poop all over the yard our kids are playing in. And I'll put a doggy door in the garage so we can put her in there while we're at work and she can get in and out. No accidents in the house while we are not home to let her out. They lady at the pet store said she will probably cry a lot the first couple of nights with out the other puppies."**

"**Aww, that's alright. She can sleep with mommy," Olivia said cuddling the dog against her chest and walking toward the kitchen.**

**Elliot just shook his head.**


	58. 58 Anticipation

_**I'm sorry it has taken me so long to update this! I got wrapped up in my two newest stories & kinda got side tracked. I will try to update everything as soon as I can. Thanks! - Detective Olivia Stabler**_

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Fifty Eight: Anticipation)_

Elliot sat at his desk staring at the baby's sonogram picture. He was so excited to finally know they were having a daughter. Liv was excited, too. She had gone all out buying up little dresses and sleepers and anything and everything else that came in pink.

They had finally finished the nursery. And Olivia had chosen to do up the entire baby room in butterflies. It was beautiful.

"You pick out a name for that kid yet?" Munch asked Elliot from across the room.

"You kidding? We just finally named the dog. Umm. For the baby I think we are going with Chloe Danielle this week."

"This week?"

"Yeah. Last week she was Sarah Jane, the week before that Lily Jade," Elliot made a not so good face. "Jessie something and there was a Rachael in there somewhere, too."

"Olivia changes her mind a lot, doesn't she."

"It comes with the pregnancy John. You should have heard some of the names that Kathy came up with before she had the twins. I think she seriously would have considered Romeo and Juliette if I had suggested it."

"Nice."

""I just want Liv to be happy. I would agree to name this kid Cinderella if it made her happy." Elliot paused for a moment as if actually considering the name. "Well, maybe not."

John laughed and Elliot smiled.

"Where is your lovely bride anyway?"

"Doctor's appointment. She should be back any time, then I promised her we'd have lunch together."

"Well Liv's gonna have to take a rain check on that one. I just got a lead on your case and I need you to check it out now," Cragen said as he handed Elliot a sticky note with an address on it.

"We're on it, Captain." Elliot grabbed his Jacket and headed out the door with Munch.

The next four months past quickly and Olivia's belly grew larger every day. She had began to have a few contractions and spotting over the last week so her doctor had suggested she go on bed rest until delivery. From this point on she would have an appointment with her doctor twice a week, just to be safe.

Olivia sat in the bed with her legs propped up with pillows and Lexy, the dog, resting beside her. She flipped the pages in a magazine as she turned the channels on the television, bored out of her mind. She was tired and achy and ready to have this over with and still had just over two weeks to go before her due date. She exhaled and turned off the TV, tossed the magazine onto the night stand and stood up to go to the bathroom.

Olivia walked downstairs to let the dog out before returning to bed. As she closed the door from letting Lexy out into the yard and turned to go back upstairs she had a strong contraction.

Olivia doubled over and placed one hand on the wooden banister next to the stairs and the other on her belly as the baby kicked her hard. All of a sudden she felt a hot gush of fluid as she looked down at her painted toes and realized she was standing in a puddle of amniotic fluid.

"Here we go," Olivia mumbled to herself as she moved slowly across the room to pick up the phone and call Elliot's cell phone.

"Hello."

"El, my water just broke and there is blood."

"The baby isn't due for two more weeks."

"Well, she is coming today, Elliot. It should be okay. Two weeks isn't that big a deal. Everything it developed and she should be big enough for a safe delivery. I am more worried about the bleeding. What if something is wrong?"

Elliot listened as Olivia groaned and breathed heavily through a contraction.

"Where the hell are you?" She almost screamed into the phone before dropping it and sitting on the bottom of the staircase.

Olivia picked the phone back up and put it to her ear again.

"That was a bad one, huh?"

"Yeah," she whimpered. "Baby, where are you?"

"I'm on my way, Liv. Oh shit."

"What?"

"There is a wreck on the bridge. Liv, I'm gonna call Fin to get you to the hospital and I will be there as soon as I can. I'm gonna check this out and make sure everyone is okay. Once more help arrives sweetheart I will turn on my siren and get there as soon as I can. I love you Olivia."

"I love you, too. Elliot, you have to be there. I can't have this baby without you."

"I will be there honey, I promise." Elliot hung up the phone and dialed Fin's number.

"Fin, it's El. Listen, Olivia is at the house alone and her water just broke. I am stuck in traffic and cannot get to her. I need you to pick her up and get her to the hospital for me."

"Yeah, man. I'm on my way.

"Fin, tell her I love her."

"I will."

"Stay with her until I get there. She is scared and I don't want her to be alone if she should have the baby before I make it."

The scene on the bridge was under control in about twenty minutes. Elliot climbed back into the car and headed for the hospital as the siren blared. He rushed across town as quickly and safely as he could to reach his wife before their baby girl was born. As he was driving his cell phone rang, it was Olivia again.

"Elliot…"

"I'm on my way, baby."

"Where are you?"

"I'm coming up through town now."

"I'm already at a nine. They will want me to push soon. I don't want to do this until you get here."

"I will be there as soon as I can."


	59. 59 Special Delivery

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Fifty Nine: Special Delivery)_

Olivia was crying and screaming and her body wanted so bad to push, but she refused. Not until Elliot was here. Fin stood by her side holding her hand and wiping the sweat from her brow as the doctor looked at him and tried to get him to convince her to push.

"She needs to push now, right now!" The doctor said peering up from the sheet over her lower half to glare at Fin.

"You tell her that!"

Olivia screamed again and the doctor raised his hand and placed it on her knee. Fin watched him noticing his glove covered in blood and moved in front of Olivia so that she could not see what was going on.

Fin quickly turned to look at Olivia. "Liv, you have to push. Elliot will be here in a minute, but you have to push and you have to do it now."

"No, I can't. I am not going to have this baby without Elliot!"

Fin looked up at the doctor who was staring at him once more. Olivia began to tremble and groaned as another hard contraction came on. She pushed her knees together to try to keep from pushing.

"Liv, Elliot is in the parking lot on his way up." Fin lied to her. "He will be here any second. They need you to push."

She whimpered and cried and squeezed Fin's hand as he thought she surely would rip it off.

"Liv, on the next contraction we are gonna push." Fin said staring into her eyes.

"I want Elliot," she gasped in tears.

"I know you do baby girl and he will be here any second. But you have to do this now. I'm gonna help you. We'll do this together."

"Ohhhhhhh," she started to moan as another contraction came on. Fin watched her, she looked so pale and he could feel her grip on his hand weakening.

"There's one coming on?"

"Yes."

"Okay, we're gonna push on three. Are you ready?"

Olivia shook her head.

"One….two….three…push," Fin counted as she squeezed his hand until he wished it would go numb.

"Ahhhhhh," she pushed hard and Fin breathed her breaths with her.

He turned to look down at the doctor as Olivia groaned again. He looked at her and nodded and she gasped and nodded back to him.

"One….two….three…push!"

And she pushed another big push. Olivia moaned and gasped for air as the doctor moved his hand under the sheet.

"Ohhhhh," she moaned looking up at Fin again.

"Okay."

She gripped his hand tight.

"One….two….three…push!"

"No, no! Don't push, Olivia! Don't push!" The doctor looked up at them from under the sheet as Olivia held her knees together trying no to push.

"You told her to push!"

"The baby is breach! We are going to have to do an emergency cesarean!"

"No! No…no….no," Olivia cried as tears streamed down her face. She looked over at Fin. "Where is Elliot?" She asked softly.

"He's on his way, honey."

Just then she spotted them. The most beautiful pair of blue eyes she had ever seen. His face was covered by the paper mask and she hadn't seen him walk in. But Elliot made his way through the room and kissed her forehead through his paper mask.

"I'm here baby. I'm right here."

Olivia was crying so hard she couldn't speak. After losing their son, she was terrified something would happen to their baby girl, too.

The doctor looked up at Elliot. "Are you the father?"

"Yes."

"You can stay, everyone else has to go, now. We have to get her into an O.R. and quick or we could lose this baby."

Elliot held her hand as they wheeled her bed into the operating room and a nurse slipped an oxygen mask over Olivia's face. They gave her drugs to numb her to perform the cesarean but allowed her to be awake during the birth of their daughter.

Elliot knelt beside Olivia and they watched the curtain nervously as the surgical team got into place and began the procedure.

Ten minutes later they heard the most beautiful sound in the world as their daughter let out her first cry. Olivia gasped and cried and looked at Elliot whose face was also covered in tears. Elliot cut the cord and a nurse wrapped the baby girl in a receiving blanket and handed her to Olivia.

Elliot pulled his mask down to kiss his wife gently as he smoothed his fingers through the baby's dark hair.

"We've got her, Liv. We've got our baby."

"She is so perfect," Olivia whispered almost out of breath.

A few minutes later Elliot stood next to Olivia as the nurses carried the baby across the room to weigh her and measure her and clean her up a little.

"Sir, we need to get your wife cleaned up," a nurse said looking at Elliot.

Another nurse turned to take the baby to the nursery.

"We will have everyone settled back in her room in about fifteen minutes."

Elliot nodded and stumbled out the door into the hallway. He hadn't even been able to breathe until he heard his daughter cry. We walked down the hall to the waiting room where everyone from work and the other children sat waiting.

"It's a girl," he said as he stepped into the room. "Six pounds two ounces, nineteen inches long and she looks just like Olivia."

Everyone was excited as they patted him on the back and congratulated him.

"What is her name dad?" Elizabeth asked looking up at Elliot.

Elliot laughed a little. "I'm not really sure, yet. We hadn't really decided. We had it narrowed down to a few, but…"

The nurse stepped around the corner and looked at Elliot. "Sir, I need you to come with me for a moment please."

Elliot felt his heart sink into his stomach and felt almost sick. He could only imagine that some horrible thing had happened to Olivia or the baby. The nurse led him down the hall into Olivia's hospital room where she was laying in her bed. She was pale and weak but she turned to smile at him.

"Hey," he said leaning in to kiss her lips.

"Hey," she whispered.

Elliot brushed his thumb over her forehead pushing her hair back into place.

"You did so good. I love you so much."

"I love you," she whispered.

The doctor walked into the room. "Mr. Stabler?"

"Yes," Elliot said with concern.

"I wanted to talk to you about something. Your wife lost a lot of blood in delivery. I need to give her more. It says in Olivia's file that you have given her blood before?"

"Yes, when our son was born. I'll do it, whatever you need done."

"Yes, sir. I will have someone up here soon to get this taken care of."

"Is she going to be okay?"

"She is going to be fine. They are both going to be fine." The doctor looked at Olivia. "You have some scarring in your uterus. Probably from the complications with your last pregnancy. That is part of what caused some of the problems with this delivery. If you decide to have another baby in the future I would like to put you on bed rest a little earlier and you will have to deliver by cesarean. Everything will be fine for now and this shouldn't cause any problems trying to get pregnant in the future. We will just want to monitor your pregnancies very carefully."

"Okay," Olivia said with a smile. She took a deep breath and sunk into her pillow.

A few hours later after Elliot had given blood and Olivia rested for a few hours, Elliot showed the crowd back to see Liv and the baby. They all stood around talking to Olivia waiting for the nurses to bring the baby back into the room.

A few minutes later Elliot opened the door and carried in his daughter. Everyone smiled peeking over the blanket at the newborn as she slept.

"So dad," Elizabeth asked again, "what is her name?"

Elliot looked back at Olivia as she smiled at him.

"Whitney Alison Grace Stabler," he said proudly looking down at the tiny baby with the big name.

His daughters smiled as they looked at her.

"I like it," Maureen said.

"Olivia came up with it," Elliot said looking at the girls.

"Where did you come up with that one, Liv?" John Munch asked.

"Well, I used the girls' middle names. Maureen Alison, Kathleen Grace and Elizabeth Whitney. She was named after all three of her big sisters."

"Ahh clever," Munch replied.

After everyone had left Elliot carried Whitney over to her mother and placed her lovingly in Olivia's arms.

"You did good Liv," he said kissing her again.

"We did good, El."

"Yeah, we did."

They stared down at the baby as she stirred around stretching and opening her eyes to look up at them. Olivia smoothed her fingers over the baby's little fingers and cheeks and kissed her gently. She looked so much like Olivia.

"She looks just like you," Elliot said proudly.

"Yeah, but she has her daddy's eyes."

"Yeah," he replied kissing the top of the baby's head.

"Of course all of your kids have your eyes."

"No they don't."

"Elliot, all of the kids have blue eyes."

"Yes, they have blue eyes. But they have Kathy's eyes. They are bluish gray. They all have Kathy's eyes. Whitney is the only one in the bunch with my eyes."

Olivia smiled. "Well, I know she didn't get them from me or Kathy," she laughed.

"She has your nose, I love that nose. And your mouth. I hope she has your smile," he said looking into her eyes. "You have the most beautiful smile."

Olivia smiled again.

"That's it," he whispered as he kissed her lips.

"I love you so much, Elliot."

"I love you too baby. And our baby girl."

Olivia smiled.

"I say next time we have a boy then another girl," Elliot said looking at Olivia.

She groaned.

"I say next time you be pregnant for nine months and go through what I just went through and then we'll talk about the third one."

Elliot smiled and kissed her.


	60. 60 Bringing Home Baby

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Sixty: Bringing Home Baby)_

It had been three days since Whitney's birth and finally today they received word from their doctor that both Olivia and the baby would get to go home. They had both been doing really and the fact that their daughter, though the delivery had shown a few complications had turned out to be a healthy baby pleased Elliot and Olivia greatly. So many worries had crossed both their minds during the moments before Whitney's birth. Most of them surrounding the memories of the tiny baby boy Olivia had given birth to two years ago just down the hall from the room Whitney was born in.

Olivia stood next to the glass of the nursery window staring in to look at her healthy baby girl. She was so beautiful and looked more and more like her mother every day.

Olivia shifted her eyes to look down the hall toward the NICU where she had once spent the longest three days of her life. She turned and walked slowly through the doors and stood in front of the NICU nursery. She stared to the back corner of the room where an empty incubator sat in the exact spot as the one that once held her son. She could almost see herself sitting there in the chair looking down over the little bed, Elliot beside her holding her hand.

She jumped as she felt a hand on her shoulder.

"El, you scared me."

"I'm sorry honey. We are ready to go down and get the two of you checked out." Elliot looked up to see what she was looking at. He placed his hands on the back of her shoulders and squeezed them tight. He kissed the back of her head.

"It seems like it was so long ago," he said staring at the room.

"Yeah."

Elliot took her hand in his. "Are you okay?"

"I'm good," she said leaning against his chest as he pulled his arms tight around her. She looked up into his eyes. "I have never been happier in my life, Elliot. I want you to know that. I love you so much."

Elliot kissed her lips gently. "I love you, too."

She smiled and leaned her forehead against his. "Let's take our daughter home."

"That is the best idea I have heard in days," he said kissing her forehead.

Whitney was not very fond of her car seat and cried the biggest part of the time she was in it. Elliot locked the carrier into the base in the back seat of the SUV, then opened the passenger side door for his wife. Olivia looked into the seat, then looked to the backseat where her crying infant sat.

"I'm gonna sit back here with her El," she said as he helped her into the backseat. "This is all new to her, she is scared."

Olivia brushed her fingertips against Whitney's little cheek and twirled her fingers in the baby's hair.

"Shhh, it's okay sweetheart. Mommy is right here beside you."

Elliot started the car and before they had even driven a mile the baby was quiet again and almost asleep.

"Everything okay back there?" He asked looking at Olivia through the rearview mirror.

Olivia smiled. "Yeah, she is just sucking on the tip of my finger and looking at me. I think she likes the car when it is moving."

Elliot laughed. "It seems she got her patients from you as well. When she wants something, she wants it now."

Olivia smirked at him in the mirror.

"I love that she is just like you. If I didn't want my child to be like you, I wouldn't have married you and had a baby with you. I love everything about you."

"Good save, El." She looked into the mirror and smiled at him.

"I thought I would drop you and the baby off at the house then run by Kathy's and bring our other daughter home."

Olivia looked back at him in the mirror a little confused.

"Lexy, babe. Dickie and Elizabeth have been taking care of her while we were at the hospital with Whitney."

"Oh, I thought you meant that one of the girls was coming to stay. Which is fine. I just kind of hoped that we could have a few days of just the three of us to kind of adjust a little before the kids come to stay."

"Yeah. But I would like to talk to Kathy about getting them for a weekend here sometime soon. I missed my last weekend with them because of work. Kathy was going to let us have them this weekend but we spent it at the hospital having a baby. I'm thinking maybe wait another week and shoot for the first weekend next month. See if all of the kids want to come stay and just have a little family weekend. Give you a little time to heal first. But that would give the kids a little bonding time with their sister also."

"Yeah. I want her to be close to the kids. I want all of the kids to be close."

"They will be honey. Those kids are crazy about her."

"I know. I love our family, Elliot. And sitting here, watching her sleep, I would love to have at least one more. Not any time soon," she groaned a little, "but later down the road."

Elliot smiled at her in the mirror. "It's a date!"

Olivia laughed and groaned again.

"You okay?" Elliot looked worried.

"I'm fine. It just hurts to laugh."

That evening as Elliot and Olivia turned in for bed, Liv peeked over the side of the bassinet beside the bed to look at Whitney sleeping.

"Sleeping like and angel," Elliot said softly in Olivia's as he wrapped his arms around her. "She is so beautiful, Liv."

"Yeah," Olivia said softly looking down on the baby.

Elliot kissed his wife and they climbed in to bed. Lexy found a place beside the bassinet and fell asleep in the floor beside it.

It was a rough night for everyone and Whitney woke up crying about every two hours wanting changed or fed or just held. Each time Olivia climbed slowly out of the bed and carried the baby down the hall to the nursery to change her and rock her and nurse her until she fell back asleep. Then she would carry her back into the bedroom and lay her back into the bassinet and climb back into bed for her next two hour nap before doing it all over again.

After the second time the baby woke up Elliot tried getting up with her and letting Olivia sleep. But she was breast feeding and Whitney wanted to be nursed. Elliot even tried giving her a bottle of pumped milk, but she refused. She was determine to get what she wanted and she was not giving up until she got it.

Elliot watched as Liv took the baby girl from him and carried her to the rocking chair in the nursery. She unbuttoned the top of her gown and sat down to nurse Whitney. Within moments the crying had ceased and the tiny baby was making little grunting sounds as Olivia rocked her and fed her.

"She has your determination too," Elliot said with a soft smile.

"She was hungry daddy," Liv whispered softly.

Elliot knelt beside Olivia and kissed her lips. He watched as she rocked the chair slowly and hummed to the baby as she nursed her. Whitney stared up at her mother with one little hand curled tightly around Olivia's finger and the other on top of Liv's hand.

"She is so amazing."

"Umm, hmm." Liv said quietly.

"You're amazing. I cannot believe that you picked this up so fast. You are a natural. I have six kids now Olivia and I still cannot tell one cry from the other. But you already know them apart."

"I'm her mommy Elliot, that's my job," she whispered softly leaning forward to kiss him. "Mommy loves you baby girl," she whispered softly as Whitney squirmed in her arms to get comfortable. "You and daddy both." Olivia looked up at Elliot and winked.

Elliot kissed her again, then looked back down at his daughter.

"That doesn't hurt?"

"It isn't exactly comfortable and sometimes it hurts. But it is what is best for her. She is pretty gentle. Besides she doesn't have any teeth."

"Thank God." Elliot looked at her and winced.

"Oh no. This would not be happening if she had teeth. There is no way."

Elliot looked at Olivia and smiled.

Whitney was up every two hours through the night, then was wide awake at five in the morning ready to greet the day.

"Okay baby, mommy is up." Olivia stretched and looked over at Elliot behind her. He was wore out and hadn't woke up this time. She leaned over and kissed him, then stood up to go get Whitney from the bassinet.

Olivia carried the baby to the bed and leaned her back against the headboard as she nursed her again. Every two hours, just like clockwork. She reached for the remote control and flipped through the channels until she found an old black and white movie. She looked down at Whitney in her arms as the baby stared up at her.

"Okay kid, we are going to have to work out a few rules here. First of all, if you are going to get up every two hours to eat you are going to have to start taking the bottle too so that daddy can take turns feeding you." Whitney stared at Olivia as she spoke and made her little grunting newborn sounds as if she were answering her mother.

"And second of all, we do not start our day until after the sun comes up. We can wake up and eat and maybe sneak into bed with mommy and daddy. But we are not up for the day until the sun is out."

"Third….lets see….we sleep at night time and nap during the day. While these may seem very similar to you now, mommy will soon teach you the difference."

"Fourth….hmmm…" Olivia wrinkled her brow and bit her lip to think of another life lesson her daughter should know. "No dating until you are thirty. That is one of daddy's rules. I am sure he will have more as we get a little older. But I thought I would introduce you to that one now and give you a little time to get used to it."

Olivia heard Elliot laugh.

"You tell her baby."

Olivia smiled. "How long have you been awake?"

"Since she started crying. You got up to get her so I just laid here and didn't move."

Olivia laughed. Elliot rolled over and kissed the top of Whitney's head.

"Good morning angel," he said with a smile.

Olivia finished nursing her and laid her in the bed between them. She laid down on her pillow and looked across the bed at her daughter and husband. Elliot smiled at her when their eyes met and Whitney gripped tight to Olivia's hand until she had fallen back asleep. Olivia turned off the television and kissed her husband as the both tried to get a couple of hours sleep before Whitney was awake again.


	61. 61 Compromise

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Sixty One: Compromise)_

**EXACTLY TWO HOURS LATER:**

Whitney opened her little blue eyes and looked up at the world around her. She wiggled around grunting for a few moments then began to cry and announce to everyone that she was awake and would like to be fed and changed again.

Elliot opened his eyes to look at a completely exhausted Olivia laying beside him stirring, but not fully wakened yet by the screams of their newborn daughter. He scooped little Whitney up into his arms and slipped a pacifier into her mouth to quiet her. Elliot moved quickly toward the bedroom door and downstairs to the kitchen knowing full well that the pacifier would come flying back out at any second followed by the even louder not only hungry, but now straight up pissed off screams of his daughter. She looked up at him as if the mere existence of the pacifier were some evil con that she had already fallen for one too many times.

He opened up the refrigerator and pulled out a little bottle of breast milk that Olivia had pumped then moved to sit on the couch with his daughter. Elliot reached for the remote control and began to flip through channels as the baby cried impatiently. He stopped changing the channels and attempted her bottle once more. Whitney made the same displeased look he had sometimes seen Olivia make and Elliot smiled down at her as she began to drink from the bottle.

Elliot picked up the remote control once more and changed the channel. As he did the baby screamed out and began to cry again.

"Okay, okay. Here, daddy will make you a deal. We will watch your cartoons if you drink your breakfast from the bottle and let mommy sleep in. Deal?" Whitney grunted and looked up at him, for this moment content.

"Good girl." Elliot slipped the bottle back into the baby's little mouth and she continued to eat her breakfast. He leaned back onto the couch and dropped the remote control beside him as he settled in to watch "Scooby Doo."

Olivia opened her eyes an hour later. She stared up at the ceiling for a moment then sat up at the edge of the bed. She moved her hands over her breasts feeling the ache of her body letting her know her daughter needed to be nursed. She stood up and walked to the bassinet noticing the baby and pacifier were missing.

Olivia walked down the stairs following the sound of the television. She walked into the living room to find Elliot asleep on the couch with Whitney curled up sleeping against his chest. Olivia moved quickly to her bag from the hospital and pulled out her digital camera grabbing the shot before either of them could move. She looked down at the screen on the camera and smiled. It was the most adorable picture she had ever seen.

She sat the camera down and walked in to the kitchen to start some coffee and breakfast. She fixed Elliot a plate of bacon, scrambled eggs and toast and a cup of coffee and sat them on the counter. Olivia walked back in to the living room and carefully took Whitney from his arms. Elliot opened his eyes.

"Good morning," he said with a proud smile.

"Good morning," she answered as he kissed her lips. "I made you some breakfast. It's in the kitchen on the counter. You should eat now while it's still hot."

"Umm, smells great. Thank you, baby." Elliot leaned up and kissed her again.

"I'm going to feed her then hopefully take a shower. Casey is wanting to meet up for lunch today. She invited all three of us."

"Actually, sweetheart I have a lot of paperwork I need to get caught up on before I go back to work tomorrow. I was thinking I would head in for a few hours. Maybe after you get out of the shower. Then I will have the afternoon and evening to spend with my girls."

Olivia smiled. "Okay. Maybe we can bring daddy some lunch at work."

"That would be great. And I am sure that everyone there is just dying to see her again." Elliot moved his fingers over her hair as Whitney opened her eyes to look at them. "She has grown so much these last four days."

"I know," Olivia smiled.

Elliot headed for the kitchen to eat.

A little while later Olivia returned with little Whitney in her arms. She buzzed around the kitchen with the baby in one arm as she cleaned up from cooking breakfast and fixed herself a cup of coffee. She carried Whitney in to the nursery and picked out a cute outfit for her then handed her off to Elliot and got into the shower.

Olivia stood in the shower and let the hot water wash away some of her body aches as she shampooed her hair. She climbed out of the shower and put on a bathrobe then returned to her bedroom to get dressed for the day.

She came back out and carried Whitney into the nursery and changed her diaper and nursed her once more before leaving the house. It was the beginning of March and still a little chilly out on this sunny New York day, so Olivia dressed Whitney in a white sleeper with little red lady bugs all over it. The outfit was among the ten or more gifts Casey had given Olivia at her baby shower and had a matching bib and little hat.

She wrapped the baby back in her receiving blanket and placed her into her car seat as she packed the diaper bag with an extra outfit, another bib, a few burp cloths, the spare pacifier and two bottles of pumped breast milk incase they were out and she wasn't able to get somewhere she could nurse.

Olivia pulled the strap of the bag over her shoulder. She went to the kitchen and unzipped her purse pulling out her wallet and keys and put her wallet into the diaper bag so she didn't have to carry her purse. She moved across the room and pulled the stroller form the closet and headed out the door.

They stopped by the precinct first to visit everyone at work. Olivia had no more walked in with the car seat and sat it on her desk when Cragen made his way from the office and scooped her daughter up in his arms. Within moments Munch and Fin had gathered around and Olivia stood back watching the three grown men as they made cooing sounds and silly faces and spoke gibberish to the baby.

Casey stepped off the elevator and walked in behind Olivia laughing at the guys.

"I really wish I had brought my camera," Olivia said.

"Oh, I would pay for a video of this," Casey replied. "So, how is my Goddaughter?"

"She's good. We're working on the sleeping at night thing. We don't really have a schedule yet and she is up every two hours to eat. But Elliot did get her to take a bottle this morning, so that should help a little."

"You must be so tired, Liv."

"Exhausted. But it is worth it." She smiled at Casey.

"Let me grab this file from Cragen and I will be ready."

"It's on my desk," Cragen replied walking into the office, Whitney still in hand to get the file.

Casey returned carrying the file in one hand and the baby in her arms. She carried her to Olivia, who buckled her into her car seat.

"She is the cutest thing I have ever seen, Liv. Seeing her makes me want one."

Olivia looked up at Casey and smiled. "I'm sure Whitney would love a little friend to play with."

Casey laughed at the thought of her becoming a mother.

"Well, you and John have been dating for a while now. Any chance of the two of you making one of these?" Olivia smiled and pointed down at her daughter.

"Probably not any time soon, Liv. So don't hold your breath."

They stepped in to the elevator and headed for the parking garage.

"Sometimes I wonder if John wants anything more than what we have now. I'm not sure how serious he is about a relationship. I mean we get along well and the sex is…."

Olivia winced and placed her hand against Casey's mouth. "Remember our agreement. You don't give me details about your sex with John and I don't give you details about sex with Elliot. He is kind of like an older brother to me Case, it just isn't right."

"I know. Things between us are fine. They are good. I just don't know if he, after his experience in marriage would even consider that. And I want marriage and I want kids, someday. I don't even think he wants kids."

"Casey, he is amazing with her. Elliot pretty much has to fight him to get his daughter back."

"I don't know. I want kids. But I don't think that I am in any way ready for them now. I work crazy hours and am always in court."

Olivia just looked at her and smiled.

"Trust me I know what you are saying. But you make it work Casey. If you want it, go for it. I think you would be an amazing mother. Look how good you are with Whitney and she adores you."

"Well, thanks. I adore her, too."

"You know, you can talk to him and make plans for things like this."

"We will see how it goes. Until then I will just have to make sure that he spends a lot of time with her to get used to the idea."

Olivia smiled. "It would be nice though, for our kids to grow up together."

"It would have been neat to have been pregnant together."

"Well, maybe next time."

"Next time?" Casey looked at her and grinned. "Is there something you want to tell me, Liv?"

"Elliot and I have decided that we would like to have at least one more. Not now. Probably not any time soon. Later down the road when Whitney is older. When she is out of diapers and off the bottle and can walk. That way I am not carrying around a toddler and a newborn at the same time. Babies have a lot of stuff to lug around."

Casey laughed. "Maybe by then…"

She looked at Olivia and they both laughed.


	62. 62 Milestones

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Sixty Two: Milestones)_

**(Almost) One Year Later:**

Olivia sat in her bed with Whitney asleep beside her. She looked at her daughter holding tight to her favorite blanket and sucking on her pacifier as she took her nap. Olivia sighed and twirled her fingers through the baby's dark curls.

"Mommy loves you so much," she whispered softly against Whitney's ear as she kissed her cheek.

Olivia sighed and pressed play on the remote to the DVD player as a home video began to play on the television screen. She felt her tears rise as she watched the compilation video of Whitney's first moments. The moment she was born and her first cries or screams rather. The first time she sat up on her own. Her first bite of baby food and the look on Elliot's face as she covered him in strained peaches and demanded her bottle. Her first word "ma, ma, ma" of course. And her first steps. By the time the video ended Olivia's face was covered in tears. Her baby was growing up and soon, she wouldn't be a baby anymore.

She looked forward to all of her big girl moments, but it broke her heart to let go of the thought of her daughter as an infant. She signed and fell back against the bed and watched the angel beside her as she slept. There was no doubt in her mind, this child was the best thing that had ever happened to her. And Olivia's reason for living. She closed her eyes for a moment and heard Elliot come in downstairs as Lexy jumped from the floor beside the bed and ran to greet him.

"We're in here," Olivia said to him as she heard him reach the top of the steps.

"Hey," Elliot said walking in to the bedroom.

"Shhhh," it took me over and hour to get her down.

"Are you okay?" Elliot reached up and wiped a tear from her cheek.

"I'm fine. I just got a little sentimental watching the video. Our baby is going to be a year old in one month."

"Honey, I know it is hard. But all babies have to grown up sometime."

"I know. And I want her to. I just miss when she was tiny, when we first brought her home and she needed me."

"Are you kidding me. She still needs you. This kid adores you. In her book mommy is on the same level as God. You are her world. I'm just the guy who turns on the cartoons in the morning."

Olivia smiled. "She would be lost if she didn't get to watch her cartoons with daddy every morning. She has been doing that since she was born. It is like daddy and Whitney's time."

"Yeah. And I love it. I just wish it wasn't at five o'clock in the morning."

Olivia laughed.

"Any luck picking a party theme?" Elliot asked.

"Not really. I want it to be something special, but unique."

"What about the television show themes?" Elliot asked pulling a note book and pen from the night stand to jot down party ideas.

"Well, she loves Dora and Disney Princesses."

"There is Winnie The Pooh and Eli is in to The Wiggles."

"No. Not even an option. Those people freak me out."

Elliot laughed.

"Something about a group of grown men dressing up and dancing around like fools. It's creepy." Olivia protested.

"Okay, no Wiggles. Blues Clues, that one is always popular. Or her favorite cartoon is Scooby Doo."

"Babe, that is kind of more a boy theme."

"No it isn't."

"Besides, Scooby Doo is her thing with you. Kind of a special thing between the two of you. I kind of want to keep that."

"And these are all way overdone. I need something more unique, not so common. We are talking New York in March. I was thinking we could have a cook out or something in the back yard. Now that we have a house big enough to do that. Grill hotdogs and hamburgers."

"We could get a clown."

"No baby, no clowns. I hate clowns."

"They freak you out, too?"

"Yes. I have a fear of clowns. I am not joking. Elliot, stop laughing it isn't funny."

"Sorry, sorry. No clowns. Ooh…I want to get her a pony."

"Elliot, what the hell are we going to do with a pony? Where are you going to keep it?"

"No baby, I mean for the party. Rent a pony. Every little girl wants two things…. One, to be a princess and marry their daddy. And two, a pony."

Olivia smiled.

"You have this all figured out, don't you?"

"I have four daughters. I have done this a time or two. Besides all the other kids will enjoy a pony, too."

"Okay, but you are on pony poop detail."

Elliot smiled.

"This party is going to be great. We need like a thousand balloons. Who are you inviting?"

"All of the kids from her nursery school class and teachers. Everyone at work of course. Kathy and the kids. That is pretty much it."

"So what are we talking about ten kids or so?"

"Baby, it is going to be well over ten kids if six of them are ours."

"Good point."

"And your daughter is popular. And you have to take into consideration that a lot of the kids at her school have siblings that will probably be there."

"Right….two ponies."

"I figured we could set up the food kind of buffet style across the deck. I'm going to call and order the cake tomorrow. I want a lady bug cake. And I'm gonna have them do one big round cake for the adults and little lady bug cupcakes for the kids. And I want her to have her own little cake to play in. Kind of tradition with the first birthday, you know? And ice cream and I'm thinking Juicy Juice instead of punch. We are talking two dozen toddlers here."

"Sounds like all you need is a theme."

"You know what? What if we did like a zoo animal theme. And brought in a petting zoo. I mean we already have ponies destroying the yard, what are a few more animals?"

"Do I still have to clean up the poop?"

Olivia laughed.

"I think they do that. Or we can pay them extra to do that. What do you think?"

"I think she would like it. I think all of the little kids would like it. Kids at this age like anything they can touch."

"I would have to of course put hand sanitizer at every table. And maybe baby wipes for messes."

"So we have a zoo theme, a lady bug cake and cup cakes and a petting zoo. Sounds like a big day for a one year old."

"Don't forget the ponies." Olivia added with a smile.

"Ponies," Elliot repeated as he underlined the word twice on his list.

"And we should have it in the afternoon so they all have time for a nap first. But not too late, so no one is up all night from the sugar. How about one o'clock?"

"Sounds good. I'm gonna go ahead and make the arrangements for the petting zoo and ponies. Can you take cake & decorations?"

"Yup. And we need to fix up a guest list so we know how much food we need."

"Okay, I will ask her teacher for a list of the kids names tomorrow. I will probably just have the invitations sent home with the kids from school and leave our home number to RSVP."

"Sounds like we have party plans. Any idea what to get her? A tricycle?"

"Baby, she is still too little for a tricycle. Her Little Einstein videos are a real hit. Oh, I almost forgot I ordered her that Your Baby Can Read series."

"Olivia, you are kidding me. You do not honestly thing that stuff works do you?"

"Well, it is educational. It couldn't hurt. Besides some of the other mothers at her school are raving about it. And it would give her a head start in school, Elliot."

"You sure this is what you want to get a one year old?"

"Well, we can get her some little stuff, too. But I think it's perfect."

"Okay. I'm gonna get dinner started," Elliot kissed Whitney on the top of her head. He tore his list from the note pad and put the pad and pen back into the drawer of the night stand.

"I'm doing to give her about fifteen more minutes then wake her up or she wont sleep tonight."

"Oh, she'd better sleep tonight," Elliot said with a grin.

"Why is that?"

"Because daddy has some plans for mommy. And the baby needs to be asleep first."

Olivia laughed.

"Get out of here," she said throwing a throw pillow at him.

Elliot winked at her and kissed her then headed for the kitchen to cook dinner.

Olivia curled up next to little Whitney on the bed. Whitney rolled over and snuggled in against her mother. Olivia cupped her hand behind her daughter's head and combed her fingers through her hair. She placed a soft kiss on her forehead and breathed in her scent. Whitney smelled like cookies and baby shampoo. Olivia closed her eyes and tried to memorize this moment.


	63. 63 The Birthday Party

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Sixty Three: The Birthday Party)_

Olivia pulled up in front of Whitney's nursery school and walked inside. She entered the class room where her toddler stood next to a table with two other children sorting blocks. Well, the other kids were sorting them, Whitney was satisfied holding one in each hand and trying to figure out how they locked together. Olivia watched her for a moment from across the room as she snapped them together and then pulled them back apart to do it again. She was so smart.

"Hey you," Olivia said from across the room as her daughter's eyes lit up and she made her way through the room of children to her mother's side.

"Up," she cooed reaching up for Olivia. This was in no way and invitation, but more of a command. If you for some reason didn't pick her up she would begin to cry in frustration. She wasn't a spoiled child really, she just knew what she wanted and had her mother's determination to get it.

Olivia reached down and lifted Whitney to her hip. "Hi baby, mommy missed you so much today."

Whitney held her pacifier in one hand and her tower of blocks in the other. She smiled at Olivia and leaned in for a kiss from mommy. She laughed and giggled and tried to put her pacifier into Olivia's mouth.

"No baby, mommy doesn't want that. Thank you though."

Whitney smiled and put it back into her mouth. Olivia walked over and signed her out then picked up her things and headed for the car.

"Somebody has a birthday tomorrow," Olivia said with a smile as she strapped Whitney into her seat. She kissed her daughter on the top of the head and handed her a sippy cup of juice then closed the door and climbed into the front of the car without a worry on her mind.

Olivia pulled away from the school and headed across town to get a little last minute shopping done for the party the next afternoon. Little did she know she was being followed. A black sedan two cars back was tailing her every move and keeping a close eye on her.

The next afternoon Whitney's party went off with out a hitch. Three dozen children and their parents and family and friends of the little birthday girl gathered in Elliot and Olivia's back yard for a cook out. Fin helped Elliot man the grill and Kathy and the older girls assisted with the rest of the food.

There was food and happily screaming children everywhere. Whitney loved birthday cake and even tried to share some with mommy as she smeared it all over Olivia's face and neck trying to feed it to her and hug her. Olivia took the birthday girl into the house and got them both cleaned up. Calmly washing the red lady bug icing from Whitney's dark locks then pulling her hair back into pigtails and carrying her back outside to play with the other children.

Whitney had a blast, but clung tight to mommy and wouldn't let Olivia out of her sight. She sat on Liv's lap and fed uncle Fin her hot dog one little bite at a time. And squealed and giggled when he made growling noises at her.

When it came time to open gifts she made a game out of putting the torn wrapping paper into the garbage bag uncle Munch had. She was more excited about that than the actual gifts inside the paper. Elliot carried her and held Eli by the hand as they walked over and fed the ponies, all four of them, chunks of apple and baby carrots. But when it came time to ride the pony, it was mommy she wanted beside her.

Casey held tight to John's hand and suggestively pointed out every adorable thing that Whitney did.

By three thirty little Whitney had climbed onto Olivia's lap and fallen asleep in her arms. Olivia carried her carefully in to her room and placed her in the crib for a nap. She grabbed the baby monitor and walked back outside. By this time all of the children were starting to wear down and the crowd was thinning out.

Kathy and Olivia began to wrap up the left over food and carry it into the house. Cragen came in to say goodbye to little Whitney before he had to head back to work. Olivia lead him down the hall to the nursery and he leaned over the rail on the crib to place a soft kiss on her forehead. As they walked back toward the front door he pulled out an envelope and handed it to Olivia.

"What is this?" She asked as she opened it.

"This is her real gift, the doll and dress were just a little something for her to open at the party."

Olivia pulled out a one hundred dollar savings bond.

"Thank you," she said with a smile.

"I want to get her one every year for her birthday and Christmas. Then when she is older and ready for a car or college or whatever, she will have it."

"This is too much."

"No Liv. This is what I want for her. I don't have any children of my own. You were always kind of like a daughter to me. And that baby is the closest thing I will ever have to a grandchild of my own. Let me do this for her."

Olivia smiled as she wiped a tear from her cheek. She nodded her head and Cragen hugged her.

"Thank you," she said softly.

"Thank you. Both of you, for letting me be a part of her life."

"You know, you are the closest thing she has to a grandfather. Or any grand parent for that matter. My mother is dead and my father…. Elliot's dad has been dead for years and his mother doesn't even remember us from visit to visit. She doesn't even know who Whitney is. So you are kind of all she has, too."

"You take care of my baby," he said as he kissed Olivia's cheek. "I will see you guys at work on Monday."

"Thanks for coming," Olivia said with a smile as she started to close the door.

"I wouldn't have missed it for the world." Donald Cragen said as he walked toward his car.

That night Olivia tucked Whitney in to her crib and kissed her gently. She walked into the bedroom and gathered some clothes for a hot bath. After soaking and relaxing for a while she sat on the edge of the bed beside Elliot and applied her lotion.

Elliot picked up the remote control and began to play the DVD from that afternoon. He slid over next to his wife and held her in his arms locking his fingers in hers as they laughed and smiled at the never ending wonder and amazement of their little girl.

"We survived," Olivia said softly.

"Yeah, until next year."

She smiled at Elliot.

"You know what I have been thinking?"

"What have you been thinking?"

"I was thinking that maybe around this time next year…. I would like to start trying to have another one."

"I thought you wanted to wait until she was three or four?"

"Well, she would be almost three by the time the next one is born. But they would still be close enough together that they would play well together. I mean Eli is five now and she just turned a year old. That is almost too far apart."

"Okay. It sounds good to me. You know what I was thinking?"

Olivia smiled and looked adoringly into his eyes.

"What were you thinking?"

He leaned in and kissed her passionately.

"I was thinking, that if we only have a year until we start trying to get pregnant again…..we should start practicing now."

"Oh, you were, huh?"

"Yeah, I was."

He kissed her again.

"I love you."

"I love you, too."

Olivia reached and turned out the lights as she slid down under the covers and up against her husband. She kissed him slowly and passionately.

"You know," she whispered, "we could always just go back to our magic waterfall and do things like we did when we got pregnant with her."

"Baby, we might have to settle for shower sex because by the time we finished paying off the wedding and the house and the car and her delivery and everything else. We will be paying for college for her and Eli and when we finally have the money to go back, we will probably both be too old to get pregnant again."

"But we could still try."

"I'm up for that."

"Elliot."

"Yeah?"

"I would _settle_ for shower sex with you any day of the week."

"You would, huh?"

"Umm hmm…." she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him over her. "Kiss me," she whispered.

Elliot pulled her tee shirt over her head and tossed it into the floor then moved his hands quickly down for the boxer shorts she wore and pulled them off as well. Another minute and he was naked as well.

Olivia laughed and raised her eye brows suggestively to him as he leaned in and kissed her slowly. Me moved his hands over her body and pulled her knees up around her. She moved her hands over his back as he kissed her body under the blankets.

"That tickles," she said with a laugh raising the blanket to look down at him.

Elliot kissed his was bake up and his mouth met hers. He slid his hand under her hip and raised her leg as he entered her. She groaned almost instantly. Elliot began to move slowly inside her as she kissed him and moved her fingers over his chest. She began to moan and closed her eyes as Elliot kissed her then reached for her waist and rolled her over.

He kissed down her back as he entered her again. He pit playfully at the back of her neck and locked his fingers in hers as she began to moan again. He moved one hand under her abdomen to pull her body in against his.

Olivia turned her head and laid it softly against her pillow. She moaned seductively with each thrust Elliot made inside of her. He kissed her mouth and the side of her face and brought her close, then rolled her back over to face him once more.

He slid her body down and pushed back into her. He raised her knees up under his arms as he kissed her and stared deep into her eyes and brought them both to a finish. Elliot fell against her body as he stared into her big brown eyes. They both gasped for a few seconds speechless as they stared at one another.

Olivia moaned at the loss of him as Elliot rolled over beside her in the bed. He raised his arm and pulled her in against his chest. He put his arm tight around her and kissed her tenderly.

"I love you," she whispered softly.

"I love you, too." He replied.

And a few minutes later his exhausted wife was asleep in his arms.


	64. 64 Fear

_**Immediate Danger**_

_**(Chapter Sixty Four: Fear)**_

**It was around eight thirty in the morning when Elliot received the phone call. Daniel Lee Brody had escaped with two other inmates. He had to find a way to tell Olivia without scaring her. He raised his head and looked at her across the squad room, this was the safest place for her. He picked up the phone and called Whitney's nursery school to check on her. The woman who answered said that she was fine and was taking a nap with the other children. Elliot told the woman to make sure that no one picked her up except Olivia or himself.**

**Elliot caught Fin by the coffee machine and pulled him out into the hall to talk without anyone hearing them.**

"**Do me a favor and don't let Liv out of your sight today," Elliot said with a worried look on his face.**

"**Why, what's going on man?"**

"**I can't tell you right now. I just need you to promise me you wont let her out of your sight."**

"**Yeah, I promise."**

"**Thanks, Fin."**

"**No problem. I just wish I knew what the hell was going on."**

"**I will fill you in later, I promise. But I need to find a way to talk to Olivia about it first."**

"**It shouldn't be too hard to keep an eye on her, we both got court until this afternoon."**

"**Good, that will give me a little time to come up with a plan."**

**Olivia approached them and noticed the cease of the conversation upon her arrival.**

"**Okay. You ever get the feeling someone was just talking about you?"**

"**It's nothing baby, Fin was just telling me you two are scheduled to be in court all day and wont be able to help us out with our case."**

**Olivia's eyes shifted to Fin's as he looked toward the ground avoiding eye contact with her.**

"**Yeah," she said, "we'd better get going."**

"**Liv wait," Elliot said grabbing her hand and pulling her back to him. He kissed her tenderly and cupped his hand on the side of her face. "Be careful."**

**Olivia gave him a confused look as she bit her lower lip.**

"**Okay, I am not sure what is going on with you. I am not even sure I want to know, so I will just play along. Yes dear, I will be careful in the courtroom today. I am not exactly what kind of trouble I could get in to there, but I will do my best to avoid it."**

"**Very funny."**

"**Well, you are starting to freak me out."**

"**I'm not trying to. I just worry."**

**She smiled at him. **

"**I know you do. But Fin has my back. I will be fine."**

**Olivia leaned in and kissed him softly.**

"**I have to go or I am going to be late."**

"**Yeah."**

"**I love you."**

"**And I love you."**

**After she and Fin had gone, Elliot sat down and made a few calls trying to figure out the details on what was going on with Brody. He and Munch went across town to talk to a witness in their case.**

**That afternoon Elliot returned to the precinct to find Fin working on a stack of paperwork. Olivia, however was nowhere in sight.**

"**Hey Fin, how'd it go today?"**

"**Alright, they let us out earlier than they were supposed to. We probably gotta go back tomorrow."**

"**Where's Liv?"**

**Fin took a deep breath and looked up at Elliot.**

"**Fin, where is Olivia?"**

"**She left early, said she had some errands to run and was gonna go pick up the baby from nursery school. I tried to stop her, Elliot. But you know Olivia, once she got it in her mind that was it."**

"**Damn it Fin!" Elliot dropped the stack of files he had been carrying on his desk. He picked up his cell phone and tied to call Olivia's phone. "Come on baby….No answer! How long has she been gone Fin?" He asked dialing the number for Whitney's school.**

"**About an hour and a half."**

**Elliot talked to the woman at the nursery school for a few seconds then closed his phone and grabbed his keys.**

"**Long enough to have already picked up Whitney," he said as he dashed toward the door.**

"**I'll come with you!" Fin grabbed his gun from the desk drawer and slipped it back into his holster. In the car he sat quietly as Elliot turned on the siren and drove across town to get the baby. "This is all my fault, Elliot! I screwed up."**

"**We'll deal with that later! Right now I have to find my wife."**

"**What exactly are we dealing with here?"**

"**It's Brody….he's out Fin."**

"**The dude that raped her?"**

"**Yeah and he also raped and murdered six other women. Liv's testimony put him away. Until she testified he thought she was dead as well. Now he is out."**

"**You think he is coming after her?"**

"**She put him in prison, Fin. Because of her testimony the man was pretty much going to spend the rest of his life in prison. And she is the only one who lived. I wouldn't put it past him."**

"**I am so sorry. I had no idea."**

"**I should have told you. I should have told her. But I didn't want to freak her out before you guys went in to court and I thought she would be okay as long as she was with you. I was going to wait until I had an actual chance to talk to her to tell her instead of just blurting it out as we past each other in the squad room."**

**As they approached Whitney's school Elliot noticed Olivia's SUV parked out front. He jumped from the car and headed up the steps as she came walking out with Whitney in her arms. **

"**Fin," he yelled tossing Fin the keys to the squad car, "send a uniform to check on Kathy and the kids. Keep someone there until I say otherwise. If they notice anything suspicious at all get them to Kathy's mothers."**

"**I'm on it!" Fin jumped into the drivers seat and sped away.**

**Elliot took Whitney from Olivia and escorted his wife to the passengers side of her car. He kissed Whitney and buckled her in to her car seat then jumped into the drivers seat and drove quickly out of town.**

**Olivia sat quiet for several minutes until they were outside of the city. She turned around to check on her daughter, now sleeping in her car seat.**

"**Elliot, where are we going?"**

**He didn't answer but was driving so fast she began to worry. She watched him noticing he kept checking his mirrors as if someone were following them. Nothing was said for several more minutes until she looked at his speed and he was driving nearly ninety miles per hour.**

"**El, what is going on?"**

**He still didn't answer. Just checked his mirrors once more.**

"**Elliot!" She shouted beginning to panic. "What the hell is going on?"**

**She began to cry. She had never seen him like this before and knew something must be terribly wrong for him to be acting the way he was. She watched him as the road signs flew past them. She looked over her shoulder at the baby sleeping in the back seat.**

"**Elliot please," she pleaded between tears. "You're scaring me." But he still didn't say anything. "Stop the God damned car!" She shouted with tears now streaming down her face. **

**Elliot looked behind them once more. Their car had been the only one on the road for nearly ten miles now. He slowed down and pulled over as she stared at him. **

**He shut the car off and turned to look at her.**

"**Liv…. I'm sorry baby," he said reaching to wipe tears from her cheeks. "I didn't mean to scare you. I just had to get you….both of you," he said looking over his shoulder at Whitney sleeping in the back of the car, "out of the city and somewhere safe."**

**She stared into his eyes, hers still full of tears.**

"**What is going on, Elliot?"**

**He took a deep breath and looked at her. He cupped his hand against the side of her face and gazed into her eyes.**

"**Brody is out."**

"**What?" She gasped as her breathing began to speed up. She leaned forward in her seat and put one hand over her stomach as she stared at the floor.**

"**I got the call this morning. He escaped two days ago with two other inmates during transport. They murdered two guards and got away. No one has seen them since."**

**Olivia was quiet for a few moments then began to gasp for air. She opened the car door and stepped out. She walked around for a few minutes and broke down crying. A few minutes later she knelt to the ground and threw up. **

**Elliot closed his car door and walked to her. She gasped and cried in panic. He wrapped his arms around her tight and held her until she had calmed down a little. She walked back to the car and leaned against it looking down at the ground as she tried to catch her breath. Elliot stood beside her and rubbed circles on her back.**

**She raised her head to look at him with tears on her face once more. "You think he is after me, don't you?"**

"**I don't know for sure. But I am not taking any chances. I just need to get you both out of the city for awhile. Until I can think this through. All of this and figure out some sort of plan."**

"**But he might not be?"**

"**No one has seen him. They have no idea where he is headed for sure. He could be in Canada by now for all we know. But it is a pretty logical bet that he will at least try to come after you." He looked at her and saw the fear in her eyes. "Baby, you are the one who got away. Your testimony put him in prison. In his eyes you are the one thing that ruins his perfect little fantasy. The man is seriously disturbed, Liv. And it isn't safe for either of you to be back there right now."**

"**So where do we go?"**

"**I have an idea," he said kissing her forehead softly.**

**They climbed back in the car and Elliot called Fin and asked him to go by there house and check everything out. He asked him to take Lexy to Kathy's and grab some of their clothes and meet him on an old dirt road twenty miles outside of the city.**

**Half an hour later Fin arrived bringing them two duffel bags of clothes, diapers, a few sippy cups, Whitney's blanket, her portable play pen, booster seat and a couple of toys. He handed Elliot five hundred dollars in cash to help them out and handed Elliot a set of keys to Cragen's cabin. **

"**You guys be careful. And if you need anything, anything at all, call me."**

"**Thanks. I'm not sure how long…. I just need a plan. I can't just sit back there with my wife and child and a crazy murderer on the loose knowing that the freak is after her."**

"**Half of Manhattan is looking for these guys. Eventually they will slip and when he does we're gonna be right on top of him."**

"**I'm counting on it."**

"**Like I said, you guys need anything….give me a call. I got a patrol on Kathy and the kids and another watching your house. Nothing so far."**

**Fin watched as Elliot climbed back into their car and drove away. Several miles up the road he stopped at a small grocery store to get a few supplies for them for the next few days. He picked Whitney up in his arms and carried her into the store as he and Olivia grabbed a few basics. Toilet paper, shampoo, soap, razors and tooth brushes. Then got a few groceries and toddler friendly foods and picked up a pizza. **

**They got to the cabin around seven o'clock. Elliot put away the groceries as Olivia pulled a few plates from the cabinet and set the table for dinner. She was still shaken and had been quiet for a little while. **

**After dinner Elliot played with his daughter in the living room floor as Olivia soaked in a hot bath. A thousand things were running through her mind. Memories of Brody and the things he did and said to her. The way he smelled and the pictures of those poor women he murdered. She reached to the side of the bath tub and picked up her glass of wine and took a long sip. **

**She was shaking again. She hated that after nearly three years he could still get to her like this. She reclined in the tub and closed her eyes. She had to fight this time. She had too much to loose to give up now. She exhaled deeply and tossed the sponge onto the edge of the bathtub as she stood up and climbed out. She slipped into a big tee shirt and a pair of Elliot's boxers and headed back to the living room to her husband and baby girl.**

"**Hey," Elliot said looking up at her from the floor as she entered the room.**

"**Hey."**

"**Are you alright?"**

"**I will be. It is just a lot to handle."**

"**I'm sorry I scared you, Liv. I should have told you earlier. I found out this morning right as you guys were leaving for court. I didn't want to have you freaking out all day. I told him not to let you out of his sight. When I came back and he was there and you were gone, I panicked."**

"**It wasn't his fault Elliot. He was on my heels all day. It was driving me crazy and he would not tell me what was going on. Finally I couldn't take it anymore. I snapped at him and left early. If he had followed me I probably would have shot him."**

**Elliot laughed and kissed the top of Whitney's head.**

"**I didn't even tell him. I wanted to tell you first. I thought you needed to know first. I just asked him not to let you out of his sight."**

**Olivia smiled. "Well, he didn't. Until I yelled at him and ran him off."**

**Elliot laughed. "Poor Fin."**

"**Yeah, I should apologize. But he was driving me crazy. I couldn't even go to the ladies room without my escort standing outside the door waiting for me."**

"**He's a good man. And would do anything for you. That is why I asked him to do it."**

**Olivia smiled it felt good to have people in her life who cared so much.**

"**Mommy needs to give you a bath," she said scooping Whitney up in her arms. **

**By nine O'clock Olivia had put Whitney to bed in her playpen in the bedroom and joined Elliot on a blanket in the floor in front of the fire place. **

"**This is so relaxing," she said softly handing him a glass of wine.**

"**Yeah. I have my wife and my baby….everything I need right here. I called Kathy and checked on her and the kids. Everything is good there. I don't think he would make the connection and I doubt there is anything to worry about, I just wanted to be prepared. You never know how a crazy person is going to react. He is after you, but if he realized we're married I could see him going after Whitney or one of the other kids to try to draw you out where he can get to you."**

"**I think he is capable of pretty much anything, Elliot. The man is insane. And he has already murdered eight people."**

**Elliot reached up and brushed her hair behind her ear.**

"**I'm here, baby. And I am not going anywhere. I am staying right here with you and Whitney until they have this bastard in custody. I'm going to protect you Olivia."**

"**I know," she said softly looking in to his eyes. "It just brings up a lot of emotions and memories. Things I thought I had forgotten until I heard his name again and he forced his way back into my thoughts."**

**Elliot rubbed her back again.**

"**We're going to catch him, honey."**

**She smiled and leaned in to him. She looked around the room and noticed the television against the wall. **

"**Do we get any cable?"**

"**There are a couple of channels, but they are all static. I think one of them is porn."**

**Olivia looked at him and smiled.**

"**So we could be sitting here by the romantic fire and listening to the porn on the television?"**

"**Or we could make our own," Elliot leaned in to her and raised his eye brow then kissed her.**

**Olivia laughed as he continued kisses up the side of her neck. She pulled off her tee shirt and laid back on the blanket. Elliot kissed her softly and made love to his wife there in front of the warm glow of the fire. Afterward he held her tight in his arms as he kissed the side of her neck again. He stretched out her arm and locked his fingers in hers.**

"**I love you Olivia."**

"**I love you too, Elliot."**

**She laid there with him quietly for a few minutes then sat up and put her clothes back on.**

"**Where are you going?"**

"**I want to go check on Whitney," she said pulling her boxers back on. "this is a strange house, I don't want her to wake up and one of us not be right there."**

**Elliot pulled his boxers back on and picked up his clothes and the blanket from the floor. He checked all of the doors and windows to make sure they were locked tight then followed his wife to the bedroom.**

"**We can sleep in here," he said quietly careful not to wake the baby. "You are right, I don't want her to wake up scared. And she is not used to spending the night in her playpen so it wouldn't surprise me any if she did wake up in the middle of the night."**

**Olivia yawned and they climbed in to bed. She scooted in against Elliot and settled in for the night.**

**The next morning Elliot opened his eyes and turned to look at the clock on the dresser. He rolled over to look at Olivia sleeping in the bed beside him and between them little Whitney holding tight to her blanket with her pacifier in her mouth. He laughed a little and kissed the baby's head. **

**Elliot climbed out of the bed and got in to the shower. Afterward he buzzed around the kitchen cooking bacon, scrambled eggs and toast for his wife and baby. A few minutes later Olivia entered with Whitney on her hip.**

"**Say good morning to daddy," she said holding her up to Elliot for a kiss.**

"**Da," Whitney cooed pointing at him.**

"**That's right, dad. She knows who has the food," Elliot replied kissing his daughter.**

"**Well, it was the coffee that did me in." Olivia pulled two mugs from the cabinet and poured them each a cup. Then she went to the diaper bag and got out a sippy cup and filled it with apple juice for the baby. Elliot fixed three plates of food and the three of them sat at the table and enjoyed breakfast together.**


	65. 65 Desperate Measures

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Sixty Five: Desperate Measures)_

A week past with no news or sightings of Brody and Elliot and Olivia decided to pack up their things and go back home. Cragen had put detail on the house and Olivia and Whitney's nursery school. Every cop in Manhattan was looking for this guy and Elliot wanted his wife and baby to be able to have a life again. For the next few weeks anyway Olivia had a shadow.

For now she had other things on her mind. In two weeks was Cragen's birthday. And this year Olivia was playing hostess to a dinner party at their house in his honor. She sat at her desk scribbling down party details onto a note pad. She had already called and booked the caterers and ordered the cake and made out the guest list. Nearly twenty friends and co-workers were gathering in her home for the party, everything had to be perfect.

Steak and chicken options with six sides, salads or soup, four deserts and three wines to choose from, she thought to herself. Flowers, she scribbled onto the list and underlined it, she could call the florist they had used for her wedding. They did such a wonderful job. She folded up the paper and put it into her pocket.

She picked up her jacket and headed for her locker. It was almost time to pick up Whitney. Olivia grabbed her keys and purse and called Elliot before she left.

"Hey, I need to run to the store after I get Whitney from school. Do you have any ideas on dinner?"

"I'm up for anything. What sounds good to you?"

"What about….Chicken Florentine? You loved that and I have not made it in a while."

"Sounds great. I have a meeting to go to and then I will be home."

"Okay, I'll see you later. I love you."

"I love you too, baby. Give Whitney a kiss from daddy."

"I will."

Olivia hung up her phone and left to go pick up her daughter. She stopped by the market, then put the baby and groceries back into the car and headed home.

Elliot headed across town and met up with a man in a black sedan. He walked in to the café on the corner and took a seat in a booth next to a window. A few minutes later the man joined him. Elliot slid a file across the table to the stranger as the man opened it and looked at Brody's picture inside.

"Did you bring the money?" The stranger said holding his hand out in front of him.

Elliot pulled an envelope of cash from his jacket pocket and placed it in the stranger's hand. "It's all there, count it if you like."

The mane stared at Elliot for a moment then slid the envelope into his pocket without counting the cash. "I'll trust you on that. So what exactly do you want?"

"I just want him gone. I want him out of her life for good. I don't want her to ever have to worry or think about that bastard again."

"Do you just want him found or do you want him taken care of?"

Elliot sat for a moment thinking about all of the hell Brody had put Olivia through with her rape and the trial. And now he was free while she was the lived like a criminal, always looking over her shoulder in fear of him finding her. If he was _gone_ she would be safe and Elliot wouldn't have to worry about Brody finding his wife and child, anymore. Olivia could rest peacefully at night instead of having the nightmares that had been brought on by Brody's escape.

"I'm not sure what I want," he said only half truthful. Elliot knew exactly what he wanted. But his conscience wouldn't allow him to say it.

"Why don't you think about it for a while? I will track him down and give you a call and you can tell me what you want done with him. But I can't help but wonder….."

"Wonder what?"

"You are a New York cop and this man attacked another cop, what makes you think that I can locate him if your people haven't found him, yet?"

"Because I know you have other means. We have to do things a certain way, by the book. But you have connections to people and ways of finding out information that I cannot use. I wouldn't have contacted you at all if I wasn't desperate to find this guy."

"If I do this, you have to let me do it my way. I cannot have you on by back or have to worry about the consequences I bring on myself for doing this."

"My meeting with you is confidential. I have not even told my wife about this. And I don't want her to know. You are doing me a favor here and I am not going to let this come back on you. More than anything, I just need to know if he is after her. This man has raped and murdered too many women, I wont let him hurt her again."

"Well you be thinking what you want done once I find him and I will call you then with to meet and talk about it."

"Okay."

Then just as quickly as he came into the café the stranger was gone. Elliot stood up, draped his jacket over his arm and headed for his car.

That Elliot stood over Whitney's crib watching her sleep. Be combed his fingers through her hair and gently kissed her forehead as he tucked her in. He moved down the hall to see his wife asleep in their bed. This was what they had both worked their entire lives for. The stable marriage and healthy family. He promised Olivia that he would protect her and protect Whitney, he couldn't let anything happen to them.

Elliot climbed into bed beside Olivia as she rolled over and curled up against him. She slowly opened her eyes and looked into his. She raised her hand and moved it slowly down the side of his face.

"I tried to wait for you to come to bed," she whispered softly, "I must have fallen asleep."

"I was watching Whitney sleep."

Olivia smiled and snuggled in against him, then kissed his lips. "You are such an amazing father."

"It isn't hard with such and amazing kid."

Olivia smiled again and Elliot leaned in and kissed her tenderly. He kissed under her chin and bit playfully at her neck as she moaned softly. Elliot moved back around and kissed her lips again. He caressed her back with his fingertips and pulled off her tank top, tossing it to the floor. Within moments he was focusing solely on the sounds she made while he was making love to her. Soft gasps for breath against his ear and gentle moans of ecstasy. The way she cooed her little "yes, yes, yes" and the way she said his name.

There was so much he loved about making love to her and the actual sex was only a fraction of it. That was incredible of course. But the way she felt in his arms, the heat of her kisses, the way she looked at him and stared into his eyes. He had never experienced sex this way with anyone else before. He had never had love like this before.

Elliot laid down beside her in the bed and watched her as she settled in against his chest in his arms and closed her eyes. He wrapped his arm tight around her and raked his fingers softly up and down her arm.

"I love you," he whispered softly as he kissed the top of her head.

He felt her smile against his chest. "I love you, too."

Elliot closed his eyes and tried to go to sleep.


	66. 66 Suspicious Mind

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Sixty Six: Suspicious Mind)_

Olivia walked into the bedroom to find Elliot sitting on the bed talking on the phone. His eyes darted to her figure in the doorway and he quickly closed his phone. It was strange, she thought, but he had been doing stuff like this a lot lately.

"Dinner is ready," she said quietly staring into his eyes.

She didn't ask, but waited for a moment for him to offer up an explanation. But there was nothing. Elliot stood and walked toward her. He leaned in and kissed her lips as he passed her and headed for the dinner table.

Whitney sat in her booster seat with a toddler fork in one hand and a sippy cup in the other, her face covered with pasta sauce from the spaghetti her mother had made. She did a fairly good job of feeding herself, making much less mess that most fifteen month old children at the dinner table. She would eat until she was finished then proceeded to stir her food around on her plate until Olivia gave up and let her down to go play.

Elliot and Olivia sat across from each other at the dinner table, not saying a word. Olivia watched her daughter as she pushed the noodles around on her plate trying to pick them up with her little fork. She sliced off a small piece of French bread from the loaf on the table and handed it to Whitney, demonstrating to her how to use the bread to push the noodles onto her fork. She watched her daughter as she did exactly as Olivia had showed her and got excited when it worked.

"Juice," Whitney cooed handing her empty cup to Olivia.

Olivia sighed and kissed the top of the baby's head as she moved to the kitchen to get her another drink.

"Would you like another glass of wine?" She asked looking over her shoulder at Elliot.

His mind was obviously somewhere else. He didn't answer her, infact he didn't even look at her or acknowledge the fact that she was speaking to him. She picked up the wine bottle and poured more into his glass. Elliot looked up and smiled at her, but didn't say a word. Something was definitely going on with him. Something strange.

Olivia sat back down and handed Whitney her cup. She picked up a napkin and wiped the sauce from the little girl's face and took another drink of her wine. She looked across the table and watched her husband so deep in thought that he didn't even seem to notice his wife and daughter anymore. She wondered what he was up to. He had never been like this as long as she had known him. Not with her anyway. They had always had an open relationship and kept no secrets between them. But he was definitely hiding something from her now. What could it possibly be? It must be something big if he felt he had to keep it secret from her.

The thought of him being so secretive almost made her want to cry. They told each other everything, even before they were married. They kept no secrets between them. It was kind of like an unspoken rule between them. Why this? Why now?

Olivia felt the tears beginning to rise in her eyes as the thought about it. She stood up and cleared her place from the table, then placed Whitney's dishes in the sink as well. She wet a wash cloth and washed down Whitney's hands and face then picked her up from her booster seat. She carried her daughter down the hall and sat her down in her playroom floor. Olivia moved across the hall to the bathroom and started bath water for her daughter and tossed in a few toys. She put the baby in the bath and sat in the floor beside the bath tub watching her splash and play in the water for several minutes.

She got misty eyes a few times and tried not to let her mind wonder what Elliot's secret could possibly be. She washed Whitney's hair and pulled her from the bath tub. She carried the little girl to the nursery and put a fresh diaper on her and a soft pair of pajamas with little feet in them. She picked her up and carried her into their bathroom and sat her on the counter to blow dry her hair. Olivia smoothed a comb through her silky dark hair and kissed Whitney's forehead. Whitney raised her little hand and rubbed her eyes. Olivia smiled as she picked her up and carried her into the living room to tell her daddy goodnight.

Olivia handed the baby off to Elliot. "Give daddy kisses, baby girl."

Elliot sat his daughter on his lap and stared into her blue eyes.

"Da," Whitney said pointing at him.

Elliot leaned in and growled at her and pretended to bite her little finger. Whitney giggled and laughed and smiled at him. She leaned her head in toward Elliot and made a small growl sound as she placed her fingertips against his lips. She smiled and waited in anticipation for him to bite at her again. When he did she giggled again.

Elliot scooped her up into his arms and rocked her for a moment.

"Give daddy kisses Whit," Elliot said softly as she leaned her little mouth in and placed a slobbery baby kiss on his lips. "Goodnight baby girl." Elliot kissed his daughter again and watched her rub her little hands over her eyes again. "She's wore out," he said softly to Olivia. "You want me to lay her down?"

"I can do it. It wont take but a few minutes, she is exhausted. I will rock her, she will be out really quick.

Olivia stepped around the corner and poured a sippy cup of water then returned to the living room and picked up her daughter. She carried Whitney down the hall to the nursery and sat down in the rocking chair. She stared down at her daughter for a few minutes as she rocked her and the baby drank from her cup until she had fallen asleep. Olivia stood up and tucked Whitney into her crib then turned on the monitor. She walked into their room and picked up the other part of the baby monitor and carried it to Elliot.

"Can you listen for her while I take a bath?"

"Sure," he answered taking the monitor from her.

Olivia returned to her bedroom and started a hot bubble bath for herself. She leaned over the edge and felt the temperature of the water. She stood up and walked back into the kitchen pouring herself another glass of wine. She lit a few candles around the bath tub and stuck an inflatable bath pillow against the back of the bath tub. She poured in some bath salts and pulled her clothes off. She started to climb into the tub, but stopped for a moment. She slipped her robe on and returned to the bedroom to grab her cell phone. She dropped the robe into the floor and slipped into the steamy water.

The water was just the way she liked it, so hot she could barely tolerate it. Perfect for soaking away the aches and pains of every day stress. She leaned back and closed her eyes placing a hot wash cloth over her face. She sat that way until she had almost fallen asleep. She raised her head back up and took a sip from her glass of wine. She looked down at her reddened skin under the heat of the water and smoothed her hand down her leg. She reached into the floor beside the bath tub and picked up her cell phone to call Casey, she would know what to do.

Olivia whispered quietly so that Elliot could not hear their conversation, for about twenty minutes on the phone. Casey's only advice was that Olivia should just talk to him. Confront him and ask him what was going on. She closed the phone and dropped it to the floor again. She took a deep breath and exhaled.

When Olivia entered the bedroom Elliot was sitting in bed reading the newspaper. She stopped and leaned against the door frame as she looked at him. He didn't even notice she was there.

"Hey," she said softly. "Can we talk?"

"Sure," he said, his eyes not leaving his newspaper.

"Elliot….is there something that you want to tell me?"

He folded the paper up and laid it on the nightstand and stared at her.

"Like what?"

"Like….I don't know. Anything?"

"Liv, I have no idea what you are talking about."

"Elliot, I know that you are keeping something form me."

He just stared at her and didn't react to her accusation.

She was quiet for a moment and turned her attention briefly to the floor as she climbed into the bed and stared at the wall ahead of her, not looking at him.

"I don't want to have to ask, but I need to know….Is there someone else?" She whispered without looking at him.

"Honey, no." She turned her head and looked into his eyes. "Baby, you and Whitney are my life."

She stared at him for a moment fighting back tears.

"I believe you."

"Just like that?"

"I trust you Elliot. But I need you to know that everything I have, I give to you. I love you so much and I'm not sure I could take losing you."

"Olivia, there is no one else. I promise you."

"Then what is it? What the hell is going on with you?"

"Look at me baby," Elliot reached for her and took both of her hands in his as he stared into her eyes. "I have been a little with drawn lately, but I am still here. I love you and I love our family. This means everything to me. But I can't tell you what is going on just yet. When I can, I will. But I can't yet."

"Elliot…" she shook her head for a second. She wasn't sure what to say so she just gave up. She slid down in the bed and rolled over with her back to him.

"Olivia, please try to understand." Elliot slid down into the bed and traced his finger along her arm. "This is something that I have to do for us. And it just isn't safe for you to know the details yet."

She looked at him over her shoulder. "I just don't like us keeping secrets from each other. Secrets are too close to lies. And I don't like being lied to."

"I'm sorry. I love you."

"I love you, too Elliot. Just stop sneaking around. If you want privacy for a phone call, that is all you have to say. I would give you that. I would give you anything."

"I know. Because I would do the same for you."

Elliot kissed her lips softly and wrapped his arms around her waist as they settled in for the evening.


	67. 67 Picture Perfect

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Sixty Seven: Picture Perfect)_

The tables were set beautifully, with a fresh floral centerpiece on each one. Candlelight cast a soft glow over the entire dining room and the place looked perfect for the dinner party. Olivia walked through the downstairs part of the house carefully inspecting each detail to ensure perfection. It was important to her that tonight was perfect.

She picked Whitney up from the living room floor and carried her upstairs to change as the party planners and caterers were putting the finishing touches on things downstairs. She sat Whitney down in the floor with a few toys as she touched up her make up and put her dress on. Olivia stood her daughter up and held both her little hands as she walked her down the hall to the nursery. She picked Whitney up and sat her down in the crib while she went to the closet to get her dress.

Olivia moved Whitney to the changing table and put a fresh diaper on her and slipped the dress on her. She Combed the baby's dark curls and slipped two little butterfly barrettes into her hair.

Just then she heard Elliot call to her from the foot of the stairs.

"We're in the nursery," she said as he stepped into the room.

"Hey, you two look wonderful." Elliot kissed Olivia and picked up Whitney, placing a small kiss on her forehead.

"And you'd better get dressed. People will start arriving anytime," she replied taking Whitney from his arms and heading back downstairs for one more look over.

Olivia sat Whitney down in the floor and tossed her a couple of toys and put Lexy outside in her pen. She stood with her hands on her hips and looked around the living room to make sure everything was in its assigned place.

An hour later everyone was gathered around the table for dinner. Olivia had fed Whitney earlier to prevent the mess in front of their guests. So for the time being the baby sat in her seat beside her mother nibbling on a breadstick.

After dinner everyone moved to the living room to mingle and carry on conversation. It was starting to get late and Olivia carried Whitney to say goodnight to their guests then headed upstairs to put her into bed. Olivia slipped Whitney into her pajamas and rocked her in the rocking chair until her little eyes finally fell shut. She carried the baby over and tucked her into her crib. She covered Whitney with her favorite blanket and laid her pacifier beside her. She turned out the lamp leaving only a nightlight and a golden glow over the room, then headed back downstairs with the baby monitor.

Olivia walked through the now dark dining room and toward the living room where her guests were. As she walked around the room she heard Elliot's voice behind her whispering. She turned around and walked to the other side of the dining room in the dark to see Elliot standing in the front foyer talking to a man she didn't recognize. She watched as the man handed Elliot a manila folder and Elliot shook his hand opening the front door for the man to leave.

Olivia stood against the wall in the darkness as Elliot walked through the room and up the stairs to the bedroom without seeing her. She wondered what he was up to. And even more, why he still felt he couldn't tell her what was going on. She took a deep breath and walked back into the living room with their friends.

About an hour later Elliot had returned to the crowd of guests and the people were starting to leave. Olivia walked upstairs with Casey to show her the rest of the house and check on Whitney.

They peeked in at the sleeping infant and pulled the door closed behind them then moved down the hall to Olivia and Elliot's bedroom. Olivia pushed the door open and stepped inside as Casey followed behind her. Laying on the dresser was the manila folder Olivia had seen the stranger hand to Elliot earlier in the night. She stood beside the dresser and slid her fingertips under the folder longing to sneak a peek at what was inside.

"Liv?" Casey said to her as she returned her attention to the woman across the room.

"Yeah?"

"I said this place is beautiful. I had only really seen the downstairs when I was here for Whitney's party."

"We like it. Actually it's perfect for us. Big enough for all of the kids and has a yard. It's close to a good school for her when she gets a little bigger. Safe neighborhood."

"Good. It's about time you got a break. You deserve this happiness."

"I am happy. I'm very happy. I just wish I knew what Elliot was up to."

"He's still doing that sneaking around, huh?"

"Yeah. I know he isn't cheating or anything like that. But it worries me a little. I trust him, I do. And I want to be able to just not let it bother me, but I cannot help it. We have never kept secrets from each other. Until now."

"What are you going to do?"

"What can I do? Just wait until he's ready to talk I guess."

Casey stood up and hugged Olivia. "I'd better get going. I have a busy day tomorrow."

"Oh yeah?"

"My mother is in town and wants to go shopping. Wish me luck."

Olivia laughed and smiled. "Good luck, Casey."

"Listen if you need to talk, I'm here."

"Thanks."

Casey left and Olivia sat down on the edge of the bed and just stared at the folder on the corner of the dresser. Downstairs Elliot walked Munch and Fin out. They were the last of the guests of a successful birthday dinner party. He shut down things downstairs, and let Lexy back inside. She followed him as he climbed the staircase and headed to bed. He went in and checked on his daughter sleeping soundly then headed for their bedroom.

As he walked in he noticed Olivia sitting in the middle of the bed, still wearing her dress from that evening and the surveillance photos of Brody from the folder were scattered on the bed around her. She looked up at him with tears streaming down her face and shook her head.

"How long?" She asked through her tears.

"Liv…"

"No! How long?"

"How long what?"

"How long have you known where he was?"

"Olivia, please just let me explain. I didn't know. Until today."

"Elliot, what the Hell is going on?"

Elliot sat down beside her on the bed. He tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and wiped the tears from her cheeks.

"I hired someone to find Brody."

Olivia's eyes widened as she listened to his story.

"He called me this morning and said he had found him about a hundred miles from here. Olivia, this man I hired…..he doesn't just track people down. He takes care of people. I told him to contact me as soon as he found Brody. Then he came by here tonight and gave me the photos."

"And you paid him? I saw you hand him the money."

"Yes."

"You hired a man to kill Brody? Elliot…"

"I know."

"You could go to prison."

"The only thing I was thinking was if this guy took care of Brody, that monster would never be able to hurt you again. You could live your life and feel safe and be safe, you and Whitney. Liv, as long as he is alive he will always be a threat."

"It is not our place to decide weather this man lives or dies, Elliot."

"I know. He told me tonight that he would give me until morning to decide. He has men sitting on Brody so he can't run. All I have to do is call him Olivia and this will all be over. I make a phone call and it just happens. And he can never hurt you again. He can never rape and murder anyone else ever again. Or…"

"Or what?"

"Or I don't make the call. This guy calls the anonymous tip line and reports seeing Brody. He's picked up and taken back to prison. They'll tack on a couple of years for the murders of those two guards and in ten years he will be out again. This time a free man. And we will have to spend every day after that wondering where he is or if he will come after you again. I told him I needed some time to think about it."

"What is there to think about, Elliot?"

Olivia turned her back to him as she pulled off her heels and tossed them across the room. She stood up and walked to the dresser pulling her diamond earrings off and tossing them onto it carelessly. She walked from the bedroom down the hall to the nursery to check on Whitney.

Olivia stared down at her daughter sleeping peacefully and began to cry again. She knew that Elliot was only trying to do whatever it took to protect his family. And she knew that if it ever came down to it he would kill Brody without a second thought. She also knew that the right thing would be to turn him in and let him be picked up and returned to prison. But doing the right thing was putting their family in danger. She was torn and conflicted about something that moments ago had been such a simple decision. She felt the warmth of her tears on her cheeks as she leaned over and kissed her baby girl.

She had no idea what to really think of any of this, yet. Somehow it still didn't seem real. Elliot had been so worried about the safety of his wife and baby that he hired a professional hit man to track Brody down and possibly kill him. As much as Elliot bent the rules sometimes, he was a man of the law. He had to have been genuinely scared for him to have gone to this extreme. She took a deep breath and turned walking slowly back down the hall toward their bedroom.

Elliot was in the bathroom changing and Olivia just crawled across the bed. She pushed the surveillance photos into the floor and laid her head against her pillow closing her eyes. Elliot returned and laid on the bed beside her. He shifted his head over to watch as a tear rolled over the bridge of her nose. He cupped his hand and placed it on the side of her face, then slid his body in against hers and just held her tight.

Olivia trembled a little as she cried in his arms. Elliot hated that he had even put her in this position. He should have been completely honest with her from the start. He held her until she had fallen asleep. He reached to the foot of the bed and pulled up the extra blanket to cover them both. Within moments he had fallen asleep as well, his arms tight around her body and both of them still in their clothes from the party.


	68. 68 Confliction

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Sixty Eight: Confliction)_

Elliot opened his eyes as the phone rang for the second time. He glanced around the bedroom and looked up at the clock on the nightstand. It was just after six o'clock in the morning. He shifted a little in the bed and noticed that Olivia had turned and scooted in against him to sleep. He placed a soft kiss on her forehead as the phone continued to ring.

Olivia opened her eyes to stare into his. Neither of them said anything at all, just stared at one another. They both knew who was calling and what it was about. She blinked and fixed her eyes on his as Elliot raised his hand to the side of her face and gently kissed her lips. They stared into each other, barely blinking through about twenty or thirty rings until finally there was silence once more. Olivia took a deep breath and nestled in against Elliot laying her head on his chest. A few moments later they were asleep once more.

It was about two hours later when the phone rang again. Elliot opened his eyes and picked up the cordless phone to look at the caller ID. He turned the phone on and raised it to his ear as Olivia stared up at him.

"Hello," he said with a tired voice.

The room was quiet for a few moments as Elliot just listened and stared into her eyes. He hung up the phone and kissed the top of her head.

"That was Cragen. It seems the FBI got an anonymous tip this morning and they are going to pick Brody up now."

Olivia looked up and kissed his lips.

"You did the right thing."

"I know. I just really hope it doesn't come back to bite me in the ass later."

She smiled and hugged him.

"I love you so much," she said softly.

"I love you too, baby."

Elliot held Olivia's hand across the car as they drove in to work that morning. Both sat nervously waiting for several hours for the conformation that Brody had indeed been taken into custody by the F.B.I. but it never came. By that afternoon Olivia was starting to almost feel sick to her stomach and was worried that they wouldn't catch him after all. Elliot watched her fidget in her seat nervously trying to occupy herself and focus on her work. He winked at her when she finally looked up at him. Olivia smiled and Elliot extended his hand out to her across the desk.

"Elliot, Olivia, I need you in here," Cragen said as he stepped out of his office. Olivia looked at Elliot as she stood up pulling out the ink pen she had holding her twisted hair in place and tossed it on the desk.

"This can't be good," she said as Elliot walked beside her toward the office, "I don't like his tone."

"I wonder who this is," Elliot said nodding his head in the direction of a tall dark headed man waiting with Cragen in his office.

They walked in and closed the door behind them.

"Detectives Elliot Stabler and Olivia Benson…ehh…Stabler, this is Special Agent Raymond Chester with the F.B.I. Special Agent Chester, these are my two best detectives and they are familiar with the Brody investigation. They would be glad to share with you any information we may have that could lead to an arrest. Our department is offering full cooperation in this case."

"Thank You," Special Agent Chester replied as they all took a seat in the office. "Olivia Benson? The same Olivia Benson from the trial?"

"Yes," she said softly looking at Elliot. "It's Stabler now."

"I'm sorry Mrs. Stabler," he replied as he smiled at her.

"Olivia, is fine."

"Olivia," he repeated nervously nodding his head. "Well ma'am, first of all I would just like to apologize for your ever having to meet Brody in the first place. I assure you that we have a team on this and we will be making an arrest as soon as possible."

"I thought that you were moving in to pick him up this morning?" Elliot asked.

"So did we. The tip we got gave the address to where he was staying. By the time our men arrived he was gone. But our team looked over the hotel room and we found enough evidence to lead us to believe that he is infact planning on making a move for you."

She raised her head to stare into his eyes as her breath caught in her throat. "What evidence?"

"Photo's mostly. Recent. Of you doing everyday things picking up dry cleaning, pumping gas into your car and picking up your daughter from daycare."

"Oh my God!" She gasped as tears filled her eyes and she raised her hands, placing them over her mouth. "Whitney is there right now."

Elliot Moved quickly from his seat toward the door.

"I have men watching her nursery school. I will have until this goes down."

"Until what goes down?" Elliot asked in confusion.

"Mr. Stabler, I am here to ask for your wife's cooperation in a sting operation to take Brody down."

"No way in Hell!" Elliot stepped in front of her and shook his head.

Olivia sat in tears unsure of what to think.

"She would have a six agent team for back up as well as a few of your own your boss has graciously agreed to loan us for the operation."

"Elliot turned to look at Cragen. "You son of a bitch! You were just going to let them go a long with this? Let them use her for bait?"

"You will watch your words detective," Cragen barked standing to point at Elliot. "No one has decided anything, Elliot! That is why I called the two of you in here."

"I can't do this," Olivia interrupted. "I wish I could help you Special Agent Chester, but I can't. I'm sorry."

"You can call me Raymond. Olivia please, just hear me out…"

"I'm sorry Raymond," she said shaking her head at him, "look I have a baby now. A family. I can't be the bait in some elaborate scheme to catch a serial rapist."

"And killer," he added. "Eight, including every woman he raped. Except for you. That is why he is so fixed on you. You are the one that got away. All I ask is that we try. You work with us for a few days. We'll set it up. Parade you around to catch his attention. Go back to your old apartment and spend a few nights. He can't resist that. Then when he makes his move, we make ours. Then we will have him."

"Olivia," Cragen began, "this is completely up to you. They need your help to put this bastard away forever. If you do this, you pick your team. Elliot of course and whoever else you want. We wire you and the moment you say the word, we move. You're in control."

"I need to make sure I got enough to put him away," Special Agent Chester argued.

"You want my detective you play it my way. She is putting her ass on the line here. She calls the shots! My people, my rules! Take it or get the Hell out!" Cragen snapped.

Elliot looked at Special Agent Chester, then back at Cragen as he tried not to laugh at the look on the F.B.I. Agent's face after being yelled at by a Police Captain.

Raymond looked back at Olivia, "you pick your back up. Anyone you want."

"I can't go back to the apartment. I don't even own it anymore."

"I have that arranged. We've contacted the new owners and worked out a deal with them. We'll use the apartment for a few days. You stay there day and night until he comes and he will. We will get him."

"No I mean I can't stay there. I have not slept in that apartment since I was attacked. I couldn't. I can't."

Elliot stood and moved to her side as she leaned her forehead into his chest, fighting off tears.

"Then we can find another place in the area. There is a hotel a few blocks from there. We can do this without the apartment. I arrange to have a few rooms rented. We will send you in with a wire and our team will be waiting in the surrounding rooms. When we get what we need or you give the signal they will bust in and take him down."

Olivia couldn't even remember how it happened exactly, but two days later she found herself sitting at the bar of the hotel drinking club soda. Through the mirror behind the bar she could see Brody across the street standing on the corner watching her. She exhaled softly as her stomach churned and she began to tremble unnoticeably at the thought of the events about to take place. This could be it. Now all she had to do was get him inside.

She wore a black skirt that fell at her knee and a white blouse with buttons up the front. To everyone around her she looked like any other woman who had just come from a business meeting and was here to unwind. But underneath her plain with blouse, below the satin camisole top and white lace bra laid her one and only weapon.

Tucked softly under the curve of her breast laid the wire. Her lifeline to the world outside that hotel room and those four walls that would imprison her once Brody had arrived. And she could only pray that her husband leading the team on the other side of those walls would be able to convince them on her word.

Olivia took another deep breath and looked into the mirror just in time to see Brody make his move. He crossed the street and entered the lobby of the hotel, but not the bar. Instead he walked straight past it not even looking at her.

Olivia tucked her chin to her chest.

"Brody's in the hotel, but he walked right past the bar and down the hall toward the elevator," she said calmly in the direction of the wire wishing to God they had a way of telling her what to do next.

She waited nervously for a moment as she heard her phone vibrate in her purse. She pulled the phone out to read the text from Cragen. _Take the elevator to the room. Teams in position. _

She sighed nervously and paid her tab then walked toward the elevator. The hall was empty except for the housekeeping cart at the end of the hall. The doors opened to an empty elevator as she climbed inside the empty box and pressed the button for the fourth floor, waiting patiently for the door to close.

Five minutes later an empty elevator opened on the fourth floor and Olivia was nowhere to be found.


	69. 69 Confusion

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Sixty Nine: Confusion)_

Olivia stared forward out the big metal doors as they began to close. Suddenly a gloved hand reached into the elevator. For a moment that was all she saw. A pair of hands, his hands. Coming at her, reaching for her and grasping her throat with a tight grip. She gasped helplessly as she stared into his familiar eyes so dark and cold, feeling her fear take over her body. She tried to scream or cry out or say the word, any word, something to let the waiting team upstairs know that there was trouble, but now sound came. They couldn't hear her tears or jagged breathing.

Brody held tight to her throat and backed her into the stair well as he pushed her against the wall. He raised his finger to his mouth to signal her silence then pulled a large hunting knife from is belt. Olivia stood silently in fear as she felt her warm tears run down her face and crash onto the concrete floor. 

Brody stared into her eyes and licked his lips as he held the knife to her throat and slipped his hand up the inside of her thigh and pushed her skirt up. He continued up until his fingers reached the elastic banc of her black bikini underwear and he smoothed his hand across her abdomen and around over her backside. Olivia gulped as he moved his hand from the skirt to unstuck her blouse. He reached to unbutton it and she pulled away from him. As she gasped heavily for breath. 

He held the knife closer to her throat and all she could think about was her daughter's smile. Olivia cried and closed her eyes as he ripped open the blouse and she heard the buttons hitting the stairs leading to the basement. She tried to concentrate on Whitney, her smile, her laugh and her hugs. The way she blew Olivia kisses goodbye every morning when she dropped her off at nursery school and was so excited to hug and kiss her mother every afternoon when she picked her up. But today it wouldn't be her mother who picked her up. Infact, it may never be again.

Olivia whimpered softly as that thought crossed her mind. She felt Brody's hand slip underneath her blouse and her bra as he touched her he pressed the cold blade to her throat and whispered quietly in her ear.

"Look at me," he said in a raspy voice.

She ignored his request.

"Look at me," he repeated this time pressing firmly against her throat until she couldn't breathe.

Olivia gasped for shallow breaths as her eyes opened. "Please," she breathed to him.

He stared into her eyes as he cupped her breast in his hand under her bra. Olivia felt a lump she was sure was vomit as it rose in her throat. She gulped as he released her breast and pulled his hand from her blouse. He grabbed her by the side of the neck and pulled her to him, inches from his face as he stared into her eyes. She made a soft little hiccup sort of sound as she tried to keep from breaking down, sure if she did he would kill her right there. 

"Why Olivia," he whispered as he brushed his nose against hers, "it looks like you have something for me." And with than he stuck his hand down her cleavage to pull out the wire, throwing it to the floor and smashing it with his shoe. "Move," he demanded shoving her up the staircase to the second floor.

He pulled a card key from his pocket and slid it through the door of one of the rooms on the hall and pushed her inside closing the door behind him. Olivia stumbled in almost tripping over the body of a dead man who laid just a few feet inside. Somehow Brody had caught on to them and was two steps ahead of the team waiting upstairs. She was on her own, now.

She stood against the wall and watched as he grabbed her by the wrist and tossed her on the bed. She stood up to move and he grabbed her by the throat and threw her against the wall pressing his thumb into her throat once more.

"Did you miss me baby?" He breathed heavily against her ear. He held one hand against her throat with the knife blade against it. Using his body to pin her against the wall he pushed his hand up her skirt again. "Did you think about me? Cause I thought about you. Boy did I think about you. Every night in my cell, in the dark, when I'd get lonely and needed a little attention. I'd close my eyes and think of you Olivia. And that sexy little outfit you wore on the stand. And that night in your apartment. The way you smelled and tasted and felt. God you felt so good inside." 

Olivia was crying silently and trying not to break down.

"Tell me Olivia," he whispered as he kissed her cheek then turned her tossing her onto the bed once more and pinning her hands above her head, "do you think of me?" He licked the side of her face as she fought off the urge to puke and groaned trying to push him away as he thrust his hips against her and she could feel him hardening against her. He moved upward to whisper in her ear again. "Tell me Olivia, sometimes late at night, do you think about me while your with him. Do you close your eyes and see me above you while he's fucking you? I know you do."

She broke a hand free and tried to swing at him. "Fuck you!"

"Gladly baby, but not yet. This party is just beginning." He held her arms again and tore the white blouse from her body pushing it aside. He took the knife and traced it along her throat and neck as a silent threat then pushed her camisole up and licked and kissed the area around her belly button as he held her arms with one hand and put his hand under her skirt with the other. He pressed his knee hard against one of her thighs and forced them apart with his hand pinning them with his knees as he slipped his fingers past her underwear and pushed them into her. 

Olivia closed her eyes and grunted in discomfort and disgust as he pulled them back out to tug at her panties. For a moment in distraction he moved his knee enough she broke on of hers free. As he struggled to catch it again she thrust it upward into his gut as he doubled over in pain. She seized the opportunity and tried to make her escape put as she pushed away from him and tried to climb from the bed he tackled her and sent them both crashing to the floor.

They struggled there for a moment as she realized he had lost his knife in the fall and she kicked and punched him trying to run for the door. He pulled her back down and they crawled across the floor racing for the knife, him almost on top of her and both of them reaching. His fingers just inches closer he grabbed it and turned around quickly slapping her hard with the back of his hand.

Olivia heard the loud popping sound of his hand on her face and felt the sting as blood poured from her mouth. She sat up for a second stunned as she instinctively raised her hands to her mouth and for a moment wasn't sure he hadn't knocked out some of her teeth. She leaned forward and gasped for a moment as her blood poured onto the carpet. 

Brody stood up and walked to her, grabbing her by the hair and dragging her across the floor.

"Do you see that?" He shouted pointing at the lifeless body in the floor. "Do you? Answer me!"

Olivia nodded her head and gasped, "yes."

"That is what is going to happen to you the next time you decide to pull a little stunt like that!"

"What do you want?" She whimpered as tears rolled down her cheeks and onto the carpet.

"I want what you took from me."

"What about what you took from me?"

He pulled her backward by the hair across the room once more to allow more room for what he was about to do to her. The blood still poured from her mouth leaving a trail across the carpet to the other side of the bed where he pushed her down onto the carpet once more.

He pushed her hands up over her head and began to tare at her underwear trying to pull them off of her. She was afraid to fight him, but more afraid of what would happen if she didn't. She struggled against the carpet and he reached to unzip his pants. He buckled her body pulling her hips in against his groin and she could feel him grinding against her skirt. This was it, this man was about to rape her again. Olivia trembled and started to break down as he pulled her hips hard into him and held her hands tight.

"This was how you liked it, right? Face down on the carpet while I fucked your brains out?" 

He twisted her head to the side and pushed her down onto the carpet again as he straddled over her legs and reached to free himself from his pants.

"What? You can't get women the normal way so you have to rape them?" She snapped and he pressed her face into the carpet.

"Now we can do this one of two ways. You see unfortunately, because you ratted me out the last time we had our fun and I had to go to prison, I'm gonna have to make sure I kill you this time." He laid the knife on her carpet beside her face making her stare at it. "So we can have a little fun before you have to go. Or…." he picked up the knife from the carpet and stabbed it into the floor beside her nose, "I can slit your throat and then fuck you. Either way, I _will_ get what I came here for."

Olivia took a deep breath. "Wait."

"What!"

He pulled her by the hair until she had turned enough to look up at him.

"Can we at least move to the bed," she whispered giving him her best seductive look under the circumstances.

"Fine, but the first thing you try I'm cutting your throat."

He stood up from the floor and watched as she stood up as well. She walked slowly toward the bed as Brody grabbed a hold of her hair again and walked with her. As they got there and there was no where for her to run he loosened his grip and let go. 

Olivia raised one knee slowly and rested it on the bed in front of her. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes for a silent prayer as a tear rolled down her cheek. She opened her eyes and raised her skirt slowly then leaned forward across the bed. She turned and looked over her shoulder at Brody who was now caressing his penis in his hand preparing himself for her.

"Is this how you want it?" She said in a soft sweet voice as she bit her lower lip. She was playing with fire. But at the moment it seemed her only option. 

"Oh yeah," Brody exhaled as he moved forward to touch her, he moved his hand up her thigh and pushed her skirt up to reveal her underwear. He smoothed his hand over them. "You have such an amazing ass." 

Olivia smiled at him again as he let go of her skirt and the material fell back down just enough to cover her underwear. Brody leaned forward behind her pressing his body against hers. He moved one hand hard against her abdomen pulling her back in against his hips grinding hard against her with full force. This time the only thing stopping his penetration were the two thin layers of material from her skirt and her panties. He thrust and moaned as Olivia closed her eyes and cried for a moment trying to think.

She opened her eyes and stared down at his hand pressed flat against the bed beside hers. She felt the pressure of him harden with each thrust against her. Eventually he was going to want more. She leaned forward a little more and forced a soft moan.

"Oh God yes," he said as he closed his eyes. "Tell me you want it."

"I want it," she whispered, moaning again.

Her fingertips danced across the comforter on the bed as she leaned back into him raising up on her knees to tool over her shoulder at him. He raised up with a look of pure ecstasy in his eyes as he stared into hers.

"Now it's time for me to give you something," she whispered seductively.

"Oh God. Give it to me baby," he said pulling her hips into him again.

Olivia moved her hands slowly down the front of her skirt and down her thighs, then began to drag them back up raising her skirt with them. She stared into Brody's eyes and pressed her lips together as she smiled.

"This is for you, only for you."

"Only for me baby."

She turned and reached across her left side then jerked back to her right and stuck the knife into his side. Brody groaned and stumbled backward from the bed grabbing at the knife. 

Olivia jumped up and tried to run toward the door, but he stepped in front of the exit. She backed up against the wall near the bed and watched as he pulled the knife from his side and it fell to the floor, blood pooling instantly around it.

Brody stumbled forward covered in blood and grabbed her again, trying hard to control her. Olivia panicked and tried to pull away from him as his blood poured onto her. She backed away from him and began to cry, trying to push him off her. 

Just then they would hear the voices in the hall way. Brody shoved Olivia back slamming her into the wall as she slid down the wall collapsing into the floor. He made his was across the room and out the window to the fire escape. 

Minutes later Elliot and the team broke the door down and entered the room, but Olivia couldn't talk. Elliot rushed to her side pulling her into his arms to examine her wounds.

"No, no, no," she pleaded trying to push him away.

"Olivia, it's me! It's Elliot. It's me baby." He cupped his hand and placed it on the side of her face turning her chin until she looked into his eyes. "Olivia, hey? Are you okay?"

She panted and gasped short little breaths as tears streamed from her face and she nodded her head at him. Then she fell forward into his arms and broke down. Elliot turned to look over his shoulder at Cragen and the guys staring down on them.

"She's okay. Can you give us a minute?"

Cragen looked up at Fin.

"Rooms clear 'cept for the dead guy."

"Let's give them some space. I want everyone downstairs to cover that exit. He's gonna be looking for a way out. And get call a bus. I want her checked out. There is blood all over this room and I don't think it all belongs to this guy.

Everyone moved toward the door and for the most part they were alone. 

"Hey," Elliot said as he hugged her and she looked up and into his eyes. "Are you okay? Liv?"

"I'm okay."

Elliot picked up her torn blouse from the floor and attempted to dab away the blood from her mouth. She raided her hand and held the folded up material to her the wound.

"It's just my lip," she said softly. "Although when he hit me I was almost positive he knocked out some teeth."

"Let me see," Elliot said gently lowering her jaw to look into her mouth. "Looks like they're all there." Elliot held her tight against him and kissed her forehead. He looked deep into her eyes. "Did he…."

"He tried. No."

"Thank God."

"But he would have. He said when he was finished, he was going to kill me so I couldn't have him locked up again."

Elliot helped her to her feet and covered her eyes as he lead her past the dead man in to floor.

"Who is he?" She asked.

"The man who rented this room. Brody was on to us from the start. He took out the camera on this end of the hall on the first three of the hotel. He killed this man to get into his room. It was close to the stairs and had easy access to the elevator."

As Olivia began to regain her train of thought she started to give Elliot details.

"Elliot, I stabbed him. And he's bleeding, there is a lot of blood."

"Where did he go?"

"The fire escape," she pointed.

Elliot radioed down to the rest of the team.

"If he climbed down they will get him."

"The roof," she said as she ran for the elevator.

"Olivia wait!"

Elliot followed her in as the doors closed behind them.

"We have men searching every floor. If he went up they will find him."

"Elliot these buildings are not that far apart. If he knew we were waiting for him then he had to know all of the exits were blocked. If he can't go down then he would…."

"Have to go up. You're right. Take this," he said handing her his gun as he pulled the one from his ankle holster as they stepped off the elevator and stood in front of the door to the roof. "You wait right here. Cragen is on his way up."

Olivia nodded her head as Elliot walked through the door.

He walked around on the roof for several minutes before he heard a commotion and a gunshot on the other side. He raced over and walked up to see Cragen and two F.B.I. Agents holding a gun on Olivia who was holding Elliot's gun on Brody. 

"Put it down Olivia, let them take him," Cragen ordered but she ignored him.

The agents stood on point ready to shoot if she didn't put the gun down.

"Elliot," Cragen said looking at him, "talk to her."

Elliot raised his hand to Special Agent Chester and his coworker as he approached Olivia slowly.

"Liv, put the gun down baby. Put it away so they can arrest him."

She pressed her lips together and panted as she stared into Brody's eyes.

"Olivia," Elliot said softly as he stepped in behind her, "it's okay now. Put it down."

He raised his arm the full extent of hers and tried to slip his hand over hers and onto the gun, but she shrugged his hand away. 

"No."

Elliot slipped one arm firmly around her waist and held her against him as he held his hand over hers trying to get the gun.

"Olivia," he whispered against her ear.

"If I just shoot him now it will all be over," she said as tears streamed down her face.

"It already is baby. Just put the gun down so they can arrest him."

But she didn't budge. She didn't even blink.

"Liv," he whispered softly. "You remember when I hired that man to find him and they were going to kill him. And you said that it was not our place to decide whether this man lives or dies. You told me to do the right thing. Baby, this is the right thing. Give me the gun."

Elliot pulled her tight into him and slipped his fingers onto the weapon as she released it into his hands and collapsed in his arms for a moment as he held her tight.

"Let's get the hell out of here," he whispered as he leaned her against him and they walked toward the door.

Ten steps away Elliot heard Special Agent Chester yell "GUN!" He pushed Olivia in front of him at the sound of gunfire and turned to see Brody fall to the ground as the F.B.I. Agents rushed to him. 

Elliot held his wife as Cragen radioed for the ambulance crew to send their people up, the scene was contained. 

Elliot stood beside Olivia as the paramedics checked her out. She sat on the back of the ambulance as Elliot pulled his jacket off and placed it around her. They watched as paramedics wheeled out a gurney and loaded Brody into the back of the other ambulance. 

"How bad is he?" Elliot asked one of the paramedics.

"They gotta get him into surgery. We'll see. It could really go either way."

Olivia lowered her head and Elliot raised her chin and kissed her lips softly.

"Are you okay."

She nodded.

"Let's get out of here. Go get our baby girl."

"Yeah," she said softly as he held her.

"Can I take her home?"

"Yeah," the paramedic replied. "She needs to get some rest."

"She will, I promise."

Elliot helped his wife inside the car and they headed for Kathy's to pick up their daughter. 


	70. 70 Closure

_Immediate Danger_

_(Chapter Seventy: Closure)_

Olivia carried Whitney as they entered the house. She kissed the baby's forehead again as the little girl rubbed her sleepy eyes. It had been a long day for them all.

"She's tired. I should put her down for the night. All I want to do is kiss my baby good night and soak in a hot bath for hours to wash Brody off of me."

"Why don't I fix her cup and you take her in and rock her for a little while. I'll go in and run you a nice hot bubble bath to relax in and I'll put her to bed."

"That sounds wonderful."

He stepped around the kitchen counter and poured some milk into the baby's sippy cup and handed it off to Olivia as he kissed her softly. He turned out the light as the three of them headed up stairs with Lexy trailing behind them.

At the top of the stairs Elliot turned right heading to their bathroom as Olivia turned left toward the nursery.

"El," she said softly as she looked over her shoulder at him.

"Yeah?"

"I love you."

"I love you too, angel."

Almost two hours later Elliot walked into the bathroom and handed her a glass of wine. He sat down in the floor beside the bath tub to talk to his wife.

"I thought you could use that."

"Thanks baby."

"You've been in here almost two hours."

"I've just been thinking. Replaying all of the things that happened tonight in my head. Realizing how lucky I am that you came in when you did."

Elliot stared at her for a minute.

"Can you get my back?"

"Sure," he said as she sat up and slid forward handing him the bath sponge.

Elliot dipped his hand into the water and let it pour down her back, then poured some body wash into the sponge and washed her back off for her.

"Are you sure you're okay?"

"I'll be fine. I'm just a little shaken up."

"I love you so much."

Olivia slipped her arm in beside his resting on the bathtub and held his hand.

"I love you too," she said softly as she leaned in and kissed him.

"I'll be out in a minute."

"Okay."

Elliot went in and checked on Whitney and carried the baby monitor into their room. Olivia dried off and slipped on her satin gown and robe. She blow dried her hair then joined Elliot in the bedroom. As she walked in Elliot hung up the cell phone and placed it on the night stand.

He looked up and smiled at her and patted the bed beside him.

"Who was that?"

"Cragen."

She turned to look at Elliot.

"Olivia, Brody died an hour ago."

She stood still for a moment and just breathed. For the first time since that monster had come into her life, she truly felt free. She walked to the edge of the bed and pulled her robe off tossing it onto the chair across the room. Elliot looked at the bruises that covered her body from the struggle with Brody hours earlier. One in particular stood out. A perfect hand print on the inside of her thigh where he had tried to hold her legs apart to rape her.

She climbed under the blankets and settled into her pillow.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"They're just bruises, El. Nothing happened."

"Olivia something happened. This whole night happened. Talk to me baby. I think you need to say it as much as I need to hear it."

He rolled over and settled, staring at her across his pillow.

"He slapped me and busted my lip. He held me down and tried to…" she paused for a moment and took a deep breath. "He put his fingers inside of me. And he held me down on the floor and pushed against me. But I still had my clothes on. He never…." she paused for a few minutes and closed her eyes.

"How did you stab him?"

"I convinced him I wanted it. After a while I quit fighting him. He let me walk to the bed and he was grinding behind me against my hips above my skirt. He got distracted and laid the knife on the bed. So while his mind was somewhere else, I stabbed him. Elliot he didn't rape me."

"I kind of figured that from what you said before."

"I know, but I needed to say it. He attacked me and held me at knife point and threatened to kill me. He hit me and fought me and held me down, but he didn't rape me."

"Honey, he will never hurt you again."

"I know," she said as her tears began to fall.

"Come here," Elliot said as he pulled her in against him and just let her cry.

Elliot held her tight all through the night. After a few hours Olivia began to stir, wrapped up in what must have been a bad dream about everything that had gone on with Brody. Elliot awoke to feel her trembling in his arms. She whimpered a little, with cries that sounded not unlike that of their daughter when she was restless during the night. Elliot slipped his arms tighter around her and brushed her hair back placing a soft kiss on her forehead.

"It's okay Olivia," Elliot whispered against her ear as she curled into him. "I'm right here baby. You're safe now. I'm here and I am never going to let anyone hurt you again."

Olivia moaned softly. "I love you El," she mumbled as she pressed her forehead against his chest.

"I love you too, angel."

And just like that, her nightmares were over.

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEO

_**Eight Months Later…..**_

Olivia woke up early and quickly dressed in the dark. She moved down the hall to Whitney's room to check on her. She brushed her fingertip across her daughter's head and kissed her as she tucked the blanket around her.

She moved down the hall to check on the rest of the children still sleeping soundly in their beds. She loved this. The weekends when they got the kids, all of the kids and even Maureen and Kathleen would join them for some family time. Last night had been a late night for them. Board games and pizza as they got caught up on the big events of each child's life. Olivia loved having all of her kids at home and her entire family under one roof.

She pulled the door closed on the bedroom the older girls were now asleep in. She turned and headed down stairs with Lexy fast on her heels. Olivia let the dog outside and stood on the porch staring out across the yard.

It was a beautiful morning. The sun had just risen and it's rays seemed to dance across the blanket of fresh snow that had fallen over night. Olivia watched as Lexy ran out across the yard barking at a few cardinals that had landed in a snow covered bush near by. She smiled and closed the door.

Olivia made her way to the kitchen and got the coffee started as she got out the supplies to cook breakfast for Elliot and the kids. Bacon and eggs, sausage and toast, coffee and orange juice, apple for Whitney who didn't seem to care for orange. She set the table and smiled again. She walked into the living room and looked at the pile of Christmas gifts stacked around the tree. Most of them of course, had Whitney's name on them. Whitney now being nearly two years old, this would be the first year she was really big enough to enjoy Christmas. Olivia could not wait to share this magical day with her daughter.

She crawled on her hands and knees across the floor to reach under the tree and plug it in. Then got up and went in to the next room to get the supplies to fill the stockings hung around the fire place. One by one she filled each one with goodies. Fruit and candy, a gift for each of the kids and gift cards to their favorite stores. Then a special gift for Elliot's. Olivia held the envelope in her hand as she stared at it and smiled once more. She laughed a little and kissed it, then slipped it inside his stocking. She returned to the kitchen and finished breakfast just as she heard Whitney's little voice over the baby monitor.

She went back upstairs and dressed the little girl and walked her in to wake Elliot.

"Give daddy kisses," she said putting Whitney into the bed with him. Whitney crawled across the bed and kissed her fathers lips.

Elliot popped his eyes open to look at her.

"Good morning princess," he said scooping her into his arms and kissing her.

Whitney squealed and giggled as she hugged her father.

"How was her first night in the big girl bed?"

"Well, she didn't cry all night and she was still in it when I went to get her this morning so I think it went pretty well."

"How long have you guys been up?"

"I've been awake for a couple of hours. She just woke up. I made breakfast, you should come down and eat while it is hot."

"Did you wake the kids?"

"I thought I would give you the pleasure of waking them on Christmas morning. I thought we could all sit down to a family breakfast. Then after everyone is fully awake do gifts."

"Sounds great. Our dinner reservation is for four o'clock. I told Kathy I would have the kids back by seven. But she did their Christmas thing with her mother last night before they came over here, so she probably won't mind if we keep them a little longer."

Olivia sat on the edge of the bed and smiled. Elliot leaned over to kiss her.

"I love you."

She smiled and laughed.

"I love you," she replied. "Now get up so we can get this day started."

"Honey, I think you may be even more excited than the kids."

"I can't wait to see everyone's faces. That is my favorite part."

"Alright, why don't you take her down and I get dressed and wake the big kids. We'll be down in a few minutes."

"Okay," she said kissing him again. "Hurry."

"I will."

_**Fifteen Minutes Later….**_

Elliot, Olivia and all six children sat around the table to eat a family breakfast. Afterward they all moved into the living room and sat around the tree as they opened gifts, saving the stockings for last as always. Olivia handed each child their stocking and sat down with Whitney. She looked up and watched as Elliot pulled the envelope from his. She looked up at the kids all around them.

"El, why don't you save that for a little later?"

But he had already ripped it open before she could stop him. Elliot slipped the Christmas card out and opened it to read the message inside as a picture fell out into his lap. Olivia took a deep breath and watched as he flipped it over to get a better look.

"Thank you honey," he said kissing his wife. "Thank you, too Whit."

"Elliot do you even know what it is?" She said staring at him as her eyes widened.

"Yeah, one of her pictures for my wallet." He raised his eyes to look at Olivia as she shook her head slowly and bit her bottom lip.

"No, El."

"This _is_ Whitney?" He stared down at the black and white sonogram picture in his hand, then noticed the date in the corner. "This isn't Whitney?"

He stared down at it for a moment as it all became clear. All of a sudden his eyes jumped to meet hers.

"This is….you're….we're gonna…."

Olivia smiled. "Yeah."

"When?"

"September."

Elliot grinned and leaned over to kiss her.

"So you're not upset?"

"Baby, why would I be upset?"

"Seven kids, El."

"Honey, we already have six. One more really is not going to be a whole lot of difference."

"How long have you known?"

"I realized I was late about a week ago, but I wasn't sure. I didn't have my appointment until two days ago. This sonogram is early. I'm just over five weeks, so there isn't much to see. But right there is the heart," she said pointing to a tiny smudge on the picture.

Elliot smiled again and winked at her.

"Hey guys," Elliot called out over the busy voices of the children, "who wants to see the first picture of your new brother or sister?"

Within seconds the children had swarmed them and were jabbering in excitement as they put their hands onto Olivia's non existent belly.

After the gift exchange they all bundled up and went out into the back yard to play in the snow. The build snow men and made snow angels and even had a snow ball fight. Elliot threw snow balls for Lexy who chased them across the yard and tried to pick them up only to have them crumble in her mouth as the children laughed. After about thirty minutes, Olivia took the little kids into the house to warm up. She put dry clothes on them and left them to play in the living room floor with their new toys as she made hot chocolate for their brood and called them all inside to warm up.

After their Christmas dinner at the restaurant, Elliot and Olivia told the older girls good bye as they headed back to their busy lives. Later they returned the other three to their mother and headed home.

Olivia turned around in her seat to check on Whitney, who had past out from the sheer exhaustion of the big day with her brothers and sisters. She smiled and exhaled then turned her eyes to Elliot.

"I love you."

"Love you too, baby." He slipped his hand across the car and rested it on her belly. He rubbed little circles there for a moment and smiled at her.

"It was a good Christmas," Olivia said as she yawned.

"One of the best! So far. Can you feel it yet?" He stared down at her abdomen and tried to remember her big belly when he was pregnant with Whitney.

"Not yet." She slipped her hand into Elliot's and looked into his eyes. "It feels like a boy," she whispered with a wink.

"It does, huh?"

"What, you don't want a little boy?"

"I would be honored to have another son," Elliot said looking up into the rear view mirror at their toddler sleeping in the back seat. "But little girls are pretty wonderful, too."

Olivia smiled with tears in her eyes as she leaned in to kiss him. She rested her head on his shoulder and closed her eyes and tried to imagine their new baby.

_**THE END**_


End file.
